Moving On
All he could do was sit there, sit and wait for time to rewind, for the past to be erased. No matter how long he sat there, though, he knew it would never go away. He wished that he could take back every hurtful word he had said to her that night. It had been a week since their fight, and all he could do was sit and drink his sorrows away. It didn't matter anymore, it didn't matter if he lived or died. The only thing that had ever mattered in his life was now gone, so what was the point of trying. Their conversation from that night haunted him; he could remember every detail, every word that had been spoken.
"I'm the one who came back I'm the one who is here. I'm the one who saved you."
"Jack…you can't…you can't do this. If you have problems, you need to figure them out…okay, because I can't have you like this around my son."
"Your son… you're not even related to him!"
So many things he wished that he could take back. He had made so many mistakes in his life, but this had to be the worst. He had lost the only woman he had ever truly loved. He had lost her and he knew that he would spend the rest of his life trying to make it right again.
He brought the glass to his lips, just another sip of vodka. Vodka seemed to be the only thing that could comfort him these days. There were days where he would spend all day drinking. No matter how hard he tried, he could not make the pain subside.
He had to believe that time would heal his wounds, that it would be better in time. He just wondered if he would ever be able to move on, he there would ever be another Kate. How could he move on when they were meant to be together? She was his other half, his soul mate, his reason for living. He knew he had to get her back. He knew exactly what he had to do and no matter how long it took him, he would win her back.
This was not going to be easy. Nothing ever was. He knew going to rehab was the best thing he could do for himself…for Kate. The doctor had told him that if he wanted to get better, he would have to stay for at least six months. Six months. That was a long time to be away from her, but if he didn't go, he may never get to see her again.
After many hours of debating, he finally agreed to the terms. For the first three months, he would not be allowed any visitors. After the first three months, he would be allowed day trips as long as he didn't go anywhere near alcohol. This was going to be hard for him, but he knew if he thought of her, he could do it.
Jack decided not to tell Kate that he was entering a rehab program. He figured he would surprise her in six months when he was back on his feet. He would fix everything, but first he was going to fix himself.
The past week had been a blur for her. She was not really living…just going through the motions, trying to stay strong for Aaron. She refused to let him see her cry again. He had been so upset the night she and Jack broke up. He continued to ask her what was wrong, or where did Jack go. She felt her heart break over and over again every time he asked. She usually ended up saying that Jack had gone back to live at his house or he was on vacation or something. She hated lying to him, but he would never understand the truth. How could see tell him that he would no longer be able to see Jack? The young boy had grown to love Jack. Even before they were together, Jack had always treated Aaron like a son.
His words haunted her every night.
"Your son…You're not ever related to him!"
He was right. Aaron was not her son, but she was the only mother he had ever known. Claire had left him alone in the jungle and Kate had taken it upon herself to take care of the boy. Kate knew that Jack had a hard time with this arrangement and it didn't help things when they found out that Claire was Jack's half-sister. This had bothered Jack for a long time, but he finally was able to work past it and give their relationship a chance. Kate thought he was over it, or at least okay with it, but judging by the way he spoke to her that night…she thought wrong.
She knew that his father had a drinking problem, but she never thought Jack would have the same problem. Sure that had a few drinks together every now and then. Special night, romantic dinners, parties, but Kate never saw a problem with it. As much as she wanted him to come back, she knew that she couldn't have him around Aaron like that. He needed help and until he got it, they couldn't be together. Kate knew he wouldn't get help. Doctors never make good patients, especially in situations like these. Whatever was wrong with him, he was going to have to work through it. She couldn't allow him to bring her down, not this time, not anymore.
She knew what she had to do. Moving on would be hard, not only for her, but also for Aaron. In time she would learn to love again. It would take a while, she knew in her heart she would never completely get over him. How could she? Jack was her soul mate, her one true love, her other half, but sometimes even that couldn't make things right. If it were another time or place, maybe they could have made it work, but there was just too much they couldn't fix. They were broken beyond repair.
Author's note: I know this chapter was short, but don't worry the will get longer. Thanks to everyone who read the original version of this story. I decided to rewrite it because I felt like I could do so much more with it and make it much better. Please review and let me know what you think.
I don't own Lost.
