A/N: There is now an extra omake tacked on to this story!

Prompt: This drabble is PURE CRACK. I make no apologies. Inspired by the bit in the second OVA where Carla turns into Laxus. It is pure gold and I could not pass it up.


Carla's eyes flicked around the guild hall. Her still slightly traumatized charge was sitting with the less crazy members of their new guild. The blue haired Dragon Slayer was having a hard time recovering from her third or fourth abandonment in her short life. Despite Carla's own goals, Wendy was still incredibly important to her.

Fairy Tail was lovely and all, there was just something missing from it, some vital element that needed to be added into the mix.

A chair and three bodies flew past Carla's head.

Oh yeah, she figured it out.

Self-control. That's what the guild needed.

Brown eyes swept over her new guildmates again, this time more…critically. If you were the Guild Master, a little voice whispered in her head, you could whip them all into shape in no time.

That…was a surprisingly attractive idea. Take over Fairy Tail and become the new Guild Master? Could she do it? Of course she could. Carla could do anything she put her mind to. It would just take time. Time, insidiousness, and careful planning if she was to succeed in her takeover attempt.

It was interesting how quickly the idea took root in her mind and dominated her thoughts.

The first one that would need taking down would be the Celestial Mage. The girl seemed innocent and sweet but Carla could see Lucy had the same assessing look in her eyes that Carla did. Lucy was relaxed around her family, but her brown eyes were always on the prowl for weak points, positions and situations she could exploit or at least manipulate to her own advantage. She was a natural leader, with brains and charisma. She could control Natsu, for heavens' sake! That took a considerable amount of power right there. Now, if Carla could bring Lucy over to her side, well, then, Team Natsu would be bound to follow! Carla, despite only being part of the guild for a few days, could see the considerable influence the bubbly blonde had on not only her team, but the entire guild as well.

Once Lucy was on Carla's side and Team Natsu followed, Carla would have to focus her efforts on the others. Juvia would leap to her side if it meant she could be near her beloved Gray. If Levy was talked over by Lucy, Gajeel, Jet, and Droy would follow. Cana could be bribed with beer, a simple enough plan despite being extremely vulgar.

What about Mirajane and Elfman? They would take some persuading, so would Master. Well, Master would have to step down or aside for Carla. Again, a place where Lucy's considerable influence could come in handy…

Carla smiled, setting down her cup of tea. Oh yes, it was only a matter of time before Fairy Tail would be hers…

All hers…


Omake:

Wendy wasn't sure she liked the frankly rather creepy smile her feline companion was now sporting. "Do you think she's okay?" The little girl whispered to Lucy. Lucy shot a glance at the white cat. The look in her face was one Lucy was intimately familiar with.

She saw it every time she looked in the mirror, after all.

"Oh yeah, she's fine." Lucy reassured the Sky Dragon. "She just seems lost in thought, that's all." Wendy sighed in relief and turned back to her conversation with Levy.

Just plotting world domination, no doubt, Lucy corrected herself, brown eyes narrowing deviously. Her own lips curled upward in a tiny smirk as one hand brushed over her gate keys. She wanted power just as much as the next mage, if not so much more; she was just more…subtle about her desires.

Perhaps the white cat could become an ally in Lucy's own quest…

It was worth a shot.


Omake #2: Carla and Lucy enlist some...help.

"You," the Poison Dragon Slayer said pointing at the white cat. "Want to take over Fairy Tail." Carla nodded. "And you," his thumb jerked toward Lucy. "Want to become queen of the world." Lucy nodded, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Yes. Those are our goals. Will you help us?"

Cobra crossed his own arms as he studied the girl and cat. Neither had the gleam of madness he usually associated with psychopaths wanting to rule the world. Calm intelligence, mixed liberally with a surprising amount of ruthlessness, shone in Lucy's eyes. Charisma flowed off her in waves. She needed to be charming, both as a former heiress and as a Celestial Mage.

"I'll help you on one condition." The two females exchanged glances. "Elaborate," Carla said with narrowed eyes.

"I'll help you achieve your goals, heck it'll probably be fun following a not so madwoman and a cat plotting world domination for a change. My condition," he focused his single eye on the Celestial Mage. As he took a step forward, he leaned in closer to the girl. His warm breath caressed her cheek as he murmured in her ear like a lover. "When you are queen of the world, I want to be your king."

To her credit, Lucy only sputtered a little bit before a similar wicked grin spread over her face.

"Deal," she said simply. "I accept your conditions."

Cobra knew this was the beginning of a beautiful relationship.


A/N: Carla and Lucy, coconspirators in World Domination. It could happen, y'all. And yes, Cobra would help them. ;)

I will be hosting a MidKino week (Midnight/Yukino) from January 31 to February 6, 2016. Please join me in this new crack pairing love!

MidKino Week prompts

Day one: Can I keep you?

Day two: Sugar High

Day three: Roommates

Day four: Late night shopping

Day five: Makeup Fail

Day six: Old Friends

Day seven: Transport

Bonus: Burnt