A/N-

Disclaimer-I do not own Degrassi, Eli Goldsworthy, Clare Edwards, or Jake Martin. Any part of this story that is like any person, place, story, etc, is purely coincidental.


Good-Bye, My Darling.


"You made Clara the hero."

"Because she is the hero."

The smile that I had fallen in love with lit up her face. Students began to walk into the auditorium, signaling the end of our conversation. She gave me another smile, a tiny, sad one this time, full of pity, and hurried towards the door. I looked after her, watching her head off towards him.

But she knew. She knew that there was still an us. There would always be an us. And nobody, not even Jake, could take that away.

She had to know. She had to-didn't she? She just had to know that I only did what I did because I love her. I love her too much to have her be with him. She belonged to me.

I knew that she still loved me. I could see it in her blue eyes. She would never forget me. Couldn't. Wouldn't. Nobody could forget Eli Goldsworthy.

I could feel the rage boil in the pit of my stomach. I felt like putting my fist through a wall. But I held on. I had to hold on, if I didn't, I would lose it.

Clare was everything. She was my everything. We would be together no matter what-or who-stood in the way. I wanted her to hold me, and I wanted to hurt her. My mind couldn't pick between the two thoughts. I wanted to hurt her, but I knew I never could. I would never lay a hand on my sweet, sweet Clare. She had to know that-right?

I felt the bile rising in my throat. I ran to the boy's restroom. I threw up everything-thoughts, memories, feelings. I didn't notice the tears streaming down my face until it was all over. I put my back against the wall, brought my knees to my chest, and wept. I wept for me, and for Clare.

How did it feel? How did it feel to be smothered by…by a monster? Did she cry herself to sleep at night? Did she ever think about leaving this all behind? Leaving me behind?

But she did leave me behind, for him. I resented him, for being able to keep Clare happy, and safe. He have her everything she needed, and everything she wanted. She would never again have to worry about me-Eli Goldsworthy. I hurt her, in more ways than one.

Would she look back one day, after raising a family with him, and look fondly on the times we shard together? Or would she not even bother remembering those memories because there was too much pain and sadness?

The tears had finally stopped, but they left sticky trails on my cheeks. My faint eye-liner had run also. I ran the pads of my thumbs across my face and stood up. I walked out the door and started on my way home.

I would never compare to him. He would win, and would get the girl. He would win my Clare.

I loved Clare Edwards. I still love her. I will always love her. And because I always will, I had to do it. I was losing my grip on her, and she was slipping away.

Good-bye, my darling.


A/N- Wow. That's not where I thought it was going to end up. I planned a much happier ending, but it got away from me. But it is kind of happy, in a sad, tear-filled way I guess.

Anyways, If you liked it, press the little review button on the bottom of the screen and tell me so (i also accept CC, but please, no flames). But a free virtual cookie to anyone who guesses which 'The Temper Traps' song I listened to on repeat to give me inspiration!

(Hint: The song was used in the movie 'I am Number Four')