"We need a great body shop, my wife just hit a deer," Craig pleaded to the world, desperately. "You just came out of nowhere," Susan scolded the deer. The deer then started screeching a deafening shriek while holding its head out the window. Susan urged him to calm down and in turn mentioned the deer's mother which got him really worked up. The deer started swearing at the couple and calling Susan a bitch. Craig was ready to fight the deer until a nice man offered a solution. Drey's Auto Body was rated 5 stars by Yelp. This made Susan so happy that she lost all anger toward the deer and offered to do it together, the deer flipped her off and Craig had enough of this, he was ready to throw down.
Craig tore off his shirt so the deer knew shit was going down. The deer had no shirt to tear off so he couldn't replicate the effect, but Craig knew he was in for a serious fight. The deer charged at him, antlers to his chest, but Craig was a trained athlete so he jumped onto the deer's back and started riding it with his hands on the antlers. Susan yelled at them to stop, but there was no stopping this beast that had been awakened inside of Craig. The deer tried to buck him off, but he held on for his life. Craig couldn't hold on forever so he got himself into an awkward, but prime position and kicked the deer straight in the balls.
The deer fell down as an employee of Drey's Auto Body stared at the deer's fallen body. Blood started pouring out of its body. Susan sighed and shook her head, but Craig felt like he did what he had to do. "So, about the car parts," Craig asked the employee. "Um, hi, I'm Desmond," the employee told him, "How can I help you?" While this conversation was going on, an ambulance came and picked up the deer.
"I can't do this," Susan screamed at Craig, "You're always getting into fights, sometimes I just want a husband who can act civilized in public for once." Susan stormed off. "Wait," Craig tried to persuade her to stay, but she never looked back. "Sorry man," Desmond tried to console him, but all he got back was a fuck you from Craig. Craig look at the ground and thought a bit about his situation. "I don't have any friends to drive me home, I'm such a failure," Craig said quietly as he teared up." "I can be your friend," Desmond looked him in the eyes and smiled at him. "Thank you so much," Craig was full on crying as Desmond hugged him to make him feel better. Desmond drove Craig home that day.
