"It is often said that redheads have short tempers, but I had passed it off as superstition until now, Captain."
Holly growled. She had just blown up at Artemis for the third time since arriving at Fowl Manor. "This is infuriating. Why am I even here?"
"It was not my choice nor yours, Holly, but Argon's."
Holly jumped up and began angrily pacing the room. She was supposed to be taking stock of the boy's symptoms, but the symptoms were too annoying! "You are speaking in fives again, and it's catching, Arty."
"No, it isn't. Your subconscious is sympathetic to my condition, and is telling you to bear with me, Holly Short."
"WILL YOU QUIT IT?"
Artemis winced, as much from her irritated expression as from the number of words.
Holly smirked. "Yeah. And I'll do it again."
Fours swirled in the boy's vision. He crunched back in his seat, covering his ears.
You can't keep us out forever, with or without your pointy-eared angel there. We'll get you. Four is death.
"No," he whimpered stubbornly. "I'm not giving up yet."
"Oh dear," said Holly miserably, flopping onto the bed and gazing at her friend from across the room. "Okay, Arty. Starting over. If Argon wants me to check up on you monthly, so help me, that's what I'll do. How are you feeling?"
He resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Barely. "How do you think, Holly? I am... critically clinically insane."
She scowled. More fives. When would it end? "Fine. How is Orion?...Manageable?" she added quickly.
He smirked. "He wishes to tell you 'hello' and 'I love you'."
"Tell him where to shove it, then."
The genius stifled a snigger in his hand. "Now he is sulking in a corner of his room."
"I am not sympathetic at all."
"He is extremely upset, Holly."
"I don't care, Artemis."
He winced. "Please add another word...Captain."
"No, Arty, I refuse."
The boy spoke through gritted teeth, ignoring the bronze fours. "Please."
"Four. It's a number. Four, four, four, four! Will you please get over-" She stopped. Artemis was frozen, an expression of terror on his face. She walked over to his desk. "Arty?"
He spoke through gritted teeth. "It's hardly fair, don't you think, that you know all my weaknesses, yet I know none of yours, Captain Short?"
She blushed, sitting heavily on the floor. "I don't have any... Arty."
"Perhaps one is your lack of prowess at lying, Holly."
Her blush deepened. She crossed her legs and studied her nails. "Well. I do have one or two. And for some reason my brain is telling me to tell you what they are."
"Perhaps you should trust your brain, despite the irony of my telling you to."
"You just want me to."
"Yes, I do." Three was okay. Close, but not... five minus one.
"Fine. I will, because I am incredibly stupid."
Artemis sat up straight and fixed both mismatched eyes on her, the picture of attention.
"Fairies, especially elves, are very, very sensitive... nerve clusters everywhere... especially around the ears. I'm just... more sensitive than most, that's all."
She's squirming, he realized. And refusing to meet my eyes. She must be hyper-hypersensitive or something ridiculous like that.
"Holly?"
Before she even lifted her head enough to see him, his hand had closed around her ear.
She will kill me when I let go, he thought, a moment before she screamed.
He was alarmed at first. His fingers froze. Then her wild gaze met his.
"Oh gods, Arty."
Those words were enough. He squeezed the shell of her ear, drawing another shriek from her lips. And another. And another. Thank God for soundproofing.
He traced his index finger ever so lightly down the rim of her ear to the lobe. Then up... further up than he had gone yet, to the tip.
A noise that needed its own classification ripped from her mouth. It was some odd mix of scream, moan, and sigh.
"ARTEMIS!"
Her brain has to have disconnected a long time ago. She doesn't conciously know this is me. So she is calling my name because... because she associates me with this feeling.
He failed to keep his head from swelling.
A few minutes later, she looked like she was coming close to fainting. So, reluctantly, the boy stopped. He laid her gently on the carpet and began to brace himself for the fury that would be coming.
She breathed evenly and deeply. And inch off of sleep.
She really is quite beautiful.
He turned his mind to her earlier words. "I do have one or two weaknesses... my brain says I can tell you what they are... I am more sensitive than most..."
Not just 'my ears', but 'I'. As in, she was more sensitive all over.
Artemis smiled slowly. He was about to call for Juliet over the intercom when a small voice came from the floor.
"You... "
She tried again. "You... are... mean. Don't you (cough) ever (cough cough) do that again..."
His face fell slightly.
"...without my permission." She climbed off the ground, dusting herself off. She stopped at the look on his face. "What's that smirk for?"
"Oh, I'm just happy that we're even. I know both your weaknesses now, Captain Short."
The elf held up two hands, backing away. "Woah. I only told you one."
"I have deduced the other."
Holly looked horrified, but a smile was trying to twist its way onto her face. "You wouldn't."
"I most certainly would, Holly. Do not underestimate my desicion."
Holly did not doubt said desicion. She knew full well that she would look back on this memory and laugh, but at the moment she was weakened by terror and anticipation. She wanted him to do it, but, then, she didn't.
I am going to look like such a puny wimp. She glanced around once more, fruitlessly. There was nowhere to hide. The furniture was too low to the ground to slide under. The door was locked, and unlocking it would take too long; he would be at her side in a moment. The room was too small to stay far enough away from him for long. In light of this, she resigned herself to her fate.
"Fine." She turned back to him, noting with surprise that he hadn't gotten out of his chair yet. He must have been working out. He knows he can get to me faster now...
She turned, looking for her first hiding place. That was a mistake, she realized a second too late. I can't see him...
Artemis pounced.
Holly felt long, manicured nails digging into her side. She held in the hysterical laughter about a tenth of a second. Her last thought was: Next month, I'm wearing my jumpsuit...
Artemis knew that her tensed muscles would give her no chance to escape. He took advantage of this and her light frame, flipping her onto the bed and raking a hand over her ribcage. Screaming with laughter, she twisted weakly, trying to break free of her frozen body. All this served to do, however, was lift her stomach closer to the boy's other hand.
I have to make sure not to get under her shirt. She must have no reason to be angry with me.
He stopped the movement of his hands for a moment, allowing her to catch her breath. He leaned down, his mouth a millimeter from her ear. The elf's already fast breathing hitched as his warm breath flowed over the sensitive skin. "You know something, Holly? This room is almost completely soundproof. And do you know what that means?"
No answer, but she knew. Without a doubt.
He spoke slowly. "No one can hear you scream."
She grinned, lying still. No point moving, as he would just as quickly hold her down.
He scraped his nails along the inside of her knees. Her leg shot up, folding into her chest, and she squealed.
He repeated the gesture on her other leg, with the same results.
Fine, thought Holly. He wants to tease me? Two can play at that game.
She widened her eyes and put on a sad expression, locking eyes with Artemis. "Arty? Please stop."
He was almost thrown by her honeyed tone. Almost. "Oh, no you don't, Holly."
He's still talking in fives, she realized, a second before he mercilessly attacked.
Two Hours Later
Holly was sleeping. She deserved it, really, after what Artemis had put her through. Though to be fair, he had been about to release her when Juliet had come in. The wrestler had needed no explanation, and had joined in immediately.
Now they leaned against the wall, watching the slumbering elf.
Juliet spoke first. "Have you considered what she'll do to us when she gets her strength back?"
"Oh, I don't think she'll be angry. She quite enjoyed that."
The girl snorted. "Oh, now that's likely. Holly Short, not taking revenge on Artemis Fowl."
"Well, if she does..." he gestured at the exhausted fairy.
"True. You could defeat her easily, with this knowledge. Well, I've gotta go. It's been fun. We should do this again sometime."
"If you even try, I will not hinder her efforts to shoot you dead," Artemis said calmly.
"Oh, because you're soooooo not planning to take advantage of this."
Holly moaned and rolled over. Both pairs of eyes snapped to her.
"I'm making you deal with her. Hell knows no wrath like a woman scorned."
"Right," said Artemis, suddenly feeling a lot less confident.
Juliet ducked out the door, and the genius (who wasn't feeling very smart) went and sat on the bed.
Holly cracked an eye open blearily. "Oh, crap."
"Almost time to go home, Holly," he said brightly. "Did you have fun? I know I did."
"Oh, shut up," she said, grinning and burying her face in the pillow. "That was exhausting. If I did that once a week I'd have muscles like you wouldn't believe."
"I certainly wouldn't object to that once a week."
She laughed. "On the other hand, if I did that once a week, I might grow resilient."
"I don't think that's how it works. You'd get softer."
"All the more reason not to do it."
Artemis pouted. "Alright, you win. But it is almost time for you to go. I don't want to be charged with kidnap again. Off you go, Holls." He pulled her to her feet.
"Ugh. I am unbelievably sore."
"I would say I'm sorry, but I'm not, Captain Short."
"Fives again. Isn't that what started this whole thing?"
He smiled and nodded.
"I'll complain more often then. Are you driving me back to Tara?"
"As you wish."
Next month's visit is in the making.
