Title: What They Say Isn't True

Author: rooster dawn

pairing: Harm and Mac

spoilers: Tangle Webb II and some other episodes of season nine.

Disclaimer: JAG is property of Belisarius productions, no copyright infringement intended.

Summary: Harm and Mac deal with the repercussions of Paraguay and a new woman in Harm's life.

Feed back is always appreciated, it's how we grow.

Author's note: I have watched TWII several time thru and thru. I didn't see Mac doing anything wrong. Kissing Webb doesn't count. Harm was the one who said and did all the wrong things. Never was meant to be a wake up call.

part 1

24 Oct 2003

Mac's Office

Mac was heading back to her office. Once again Sturgis had been unreasonable in court. She had offered Sturgis several alternative settlements, but he refused them each time. He didn't even want to talk about them

Ever since Bud screwed up the appeal with his inadequate defense of Sturgis's abilities as a lawyer, Sturgis had been a hard ass about everything. He no longer spoke with Bud. He would only talked to him in an official capacity as a senior officer.

Bobbie had broken off her relationship with him after she had returned from the campaign trail. And Harm was no longer around for him to be his friend and to talk to about his problems. Mac was fed up with his act and his attitude.

"Just what is your problem Sturgis?" asked an angry Mac.

She couldn't believe his attitude. His attitude had sucked since she had returned from Paraguay. Something or someone must be crawling up his six.

"Is this about Bobbie breaking up with you?"

"It's you Mac. You're being unreasonable. You seem to think you're so much better than everyone else." moaned Sturgis.

"What are you talking about Sturgis? I come in here everyday like everyone else and do my job. It's not my fault that I beat you and you lose to me all the time. If anything you're the hard ass who can't seem to do anything right.

You're the one who can't get along with anyone anymore. Is it my fault Bobbie broke up with you? Is it my fault that you have been accused of being a racist? Is it my fault you don't have a life anymore?" defended Mac.

"It is your fault Harm isn't here now. My life was just fine when he was working here." replied Sturgis.

"Oh please! Give me a frigging break! All you ever did was butt into our lives and complain about our fighting. How it disturbed your inner peace and tranquility. He's not here to disturb your inner peace anymore.

Your problem is Harm no longer buffers you from the Admiral. Harm use to take the brunt of the Admiral's anger for all of us. Now he's taking it out on you." corrected Mac.

"I don't know anything about that, maybe he did, but he's not here anymore. It's all because of you." replied Sturgis.

His voice was beginning to get loud. He was drawing the attention of everyone in the office. Mac's voice got louder too. She knew how to fight. She had had many years of practice with Harm. And being a marine, she never backed down from a fight.

"And just how is it my fault that Harm isn't working here anymore?" asked Mac.

"He resigned his commission to go after you when you were reported missing." snarled Sturgis.

"So how is that my fault? No one asked him to. I certainly didn't. The Admiral ordered him not to." replied Mac angrily.

She wasn't Harm's keeper, never was nor would she ever be. Harm did what Harm wanted whenever he wanted. There was no stopping him once his mind was made up.

"He had to Mac. He didn't want to lose you. He didn't want you to die. He loves you Mac." argued Sturgis.

"Is that so Sturgis. Isn't it quite interesting that he never mentioned that he resigned his commission to me. I had to find out about it from Webb. When I asked Harm about it, why he resigned his commission, he never mentioned anything to me about being in love with me.

All he said was the Admiral wouldn't give him leave or authorize a rescue mission. He didn't do anything for me that he wouldn't have done for anyone else." replied Mac defensively.

She knew what Sturgis said was probably true, but it didn't change anything. It didn't change the fact that Harm wasn't here and she missed him.

"That's not true Mac." argued Sturgis.

"It is true. I know him Sturgis, probably better than anyone else here. What he did he would have done for any of his friends." corrected Mac.

"But he doesn't love anyone else Mac!" whined an exasperated Sturgis. "Why are you being so sanctimonious?"

At this point in time Harm walked into the office area. He had heard the commotion as he walked off the elevator. He had come in to talk with Mac about the Carolyn Imes court martial. She wanted him to testify on Carolyn's behalf.

He quickly knew it was Mac and Sturgis arguing about something. In one respect he was glad he was not the only one that argued with her or could set her off. He always felt bad about it later.

He knew somehow it was usually his fault when they didn't agree on something, that if he had listened to her more carefully and to what she was trying to say they wouldn't fight as often.

As he listened to her voice, it was like listening to a songbird. It was so beautiful, just the right pitch and tremor. It reminded him of how much he missed her. Then he heard the words "He loves you Mac."

He knew they must be arguing about him and why he wasn't at JAG anymore. He knew he had to put a stop to it before it went any further and the Admiral got involved.

Even though he was angry with the Admiral, he didn't want to see Mac or Sturgis get into trouble because they were arguing about him. The last thing Mac needed was the Admiral mad at her.

He walked into the office area and saw everyone gathered around watching the argument. Everyone parted as he walked by them on the way to Mac and Sturgis. Most of them even made an attempt to move back to whatever they were doing before the argument began.

"But you know what's even worse Mac? After Harm rescued you from Sadiq, you never thanked him. Instead you ran to Webb, the sniveling loser of a spook." yelled Sturgis. Harm cringed at that commentary.

He knew whatever decorum Mac still had would be gone now. He had to get to her before it went any further, before Mac kicked Sturgis's sorry six to hell and back, but he was too late.

"Just what makes you think I didn't thank Harm for rescuing me? And who or what gave you the idea that I went running to Webb after Harm left town? What makes you think I'm even with Webb?" yelled Mac.

She was ready to kill someone, especially a certain six foot four sailor with dreamy blue eyes and a smile that caused her knees to buckled, who hadn't return any of her telephone calls for the last six months.

Harm stepped in at that point. He took her arm to try and lead Mac away to her office. She slapped his hand off her arm and turned towards him. If looks could kill, Harm would have been dead ten times over.

"Mac ... " began Harm.

"What are you doing here?" she snapped.

"You left me a message. You wanted to talk to me about Carolyn Imes." he replied.

"Why now? I've been trying to talk to you for the last six months Harm!" yelled Mac.

"Not out here Mac, let's go into your office where we can have some privacy." replied Harm trying to calm her down.

"Take your hands off me Harm! I'm a marine! I will not be taken to my office like a bad little schoolgirl. If you have something to say to me, you can say it out here where everyone can hear you.

Today is the day for clearing the air Harm. It's the day when the truth comes out and all the misconceptions everyone has about what happen are dispelled!" spat Mac as she resisted Harm's attempt to lead her into her office.

"Mac, this isn't the proper place to hash it all out." sighed Harm.

"Of course it is Harm. Everyone here thinks it's my fault you aren't here at JAG anymore, why you're not still in the Navy. We both know that isn't true, right Harm.

You're the one who resigned your commission. No one asked you to, not the Admiral, not me. You knew the consequences of your actions." Mac stated defiantly.

"Yes Mac, you're right. I knew the possibility that the Admiral would process my resignation, but I thought rescuing you was far more important than being in the navy, being here at JAG, or anything else in the world." replied Harm.

"And I appreciated that you did Harm. What I didn't understand was why you thought it wasn't necessary to tell me. Hell, I knew you would come after me Harm. Even Webb knew that. I think he was counting on you to come to the rescue and bail his sorry six out again when he screwed up.

I knew sooner or later you would be there to save the day, though I thought you would have gotten there a little sooner, but I forgot, you're usually late. I kept on telling Webb to hang in there.

That you were on your way. But after a few days he told me you wouldn't because the Admiral wouldn't let you. Why couldn't you have just told me Harm? You had plenty of chances. Why did I have to find out from Webb that you resigned your commission?" wailed Mac.

"It would have made everything so much simpler, but instead you let Webb bait you. I mean, you didn't have any trouble telling me about your wedding to Catherine."

"I'm sorry Mac, I wanted to tell you, but after I saw you kiss Webb, I couldn't. I thought you had moved on to him." moaned Harm.

"I don't understand how you could possibly think that Harm. I was only gone with him for a ten days before you arrived to rescue me. Most of the time he kept telling me what a stupid fool you were for not telling me about how you felt.

He only implied he loved me after you and Gunny put him into the truck. I thought he was dying Harm. That could have been me lying there. The only reason I kissed him was to shut him up and thank him for protecting me." sighed Mac.

"I mean let's face it Harm. You asked me about the kiss. I told you it meant nothing. I told you there was nothing between Clay and me. But you decided to be anal and not listen to me once again.

Yes, Clay and I were closer than before Harm, but that was only because we spent some time together. If you didn't have your head up your six you would have seen it.

What kind of person would I be if I didn't try to help him Harm. He was hurting really bad there. He should have been in the hospital. If anything Harm, you should have thanked him." continued Mac.

"What! The bastard made the moves on you. He did everything to get in between us. He was supposed to be my friend. He was supposed to be looking after you, not putting you in danger. He should never have told you how he felt." exclaimed Harm loudly and in disbelief.

"He did protect me Harm. I wasn't the one that got hurt. He took all the torture. He wouldn't allow them to do anything to me." argued Mac trying to correct a misconception.

"Then why did I find you strapped to the table and not him? If he wasn't in the condition he was in, I would have hurt him myself." replied Harm angrily.

"Because I wouldn't let him protect me anymore Harm. He probably would have died if he underwent one more torture session. I couldn't let him die to save my life. I just couldn't." wailed Mac now with tears in her eyes.

"You know everything was going pretty good in the hotel room until Gunny and Clay showed up. We were in bed together getting ready to show our appreciation to each other for being alive and safe." wailed Mac.

"But you went to him Mac. You left me." whined Harm.

"It was only for a moment Harm. I had to make sure he was alright. You know it was the right thing to do. He's our friend Harm. But you had to let your male pride and insecurities take over. You couldn't see reason after that." argued Mac.

"I thought you wanted to be with him and not with me." replied Harm.

"You know that's not true Harm. You let him bait you. Even after we got him settled in another room, whom did I decide to spend the rest of the night with Harm? Was it with him or was it with you?" answered Mac not backing down.