Full description: "Only Diamonds can cut Diamonds, and everyone else was Metal."
After the disaster that was their mission to the Land of Waves, Sakura Haruno decides she's done being the weakest member of her team. She vows to become a better kunoichi, a better shinobi, and to become someone her teammates can count on. She swears to take her training seriously and to no longer be someone to be watched over because she can't take care of herself.
In her journey to become the strongest shinobi she can be, she will receive help from the unlikeliest of sources and will form bonds stronger than anything, and the team she has always dreamed of will become her reality.

Okay, okay, I know that I already have stories I should be writing. But after rereading Invincible Shadow's Pulling My Weight and Sakucherryblossoms' Strength Within Myself, I couldn't help myself - I started writing this. I mean, really, come on! We need more stories like Pulling My Weight on the internet; it's just so good, but you can only reread it so many times before you get tired!

So I decided to write this.

Yes, it is inspired by Pulling My Weight, but I'm not intending to copy Invincible Shadow's idea. Besides, Sakucherryblossoms technically did it first.

But, anyway, so this story should mostly follow canon. That's the plan, but don't hold me to it. I'm going to be drawing mostly from the manga since it has a slightly better portrayal of Sakura-chan in most cases, but for scenes where the manga's version of events isn't as good as the anime's, I'll use the anime - basically, quality comes first.

Now, with that said, let's get this party started. Shannaro!

Disclaimer: Naruto isn't mine, but the changes you don't recognize are mine.


Diamond


Chapter 1
My Nindo, My Ninja Way


"I'm not gonna run away! I never go back on my word! That's my ninja way!"
~Naruto Uzumaki,
Naruto (Chapter 103)


Though her eyes never leave the hasty graves her team made for Zabuza and Haku and while she is aware of Naruto creeping forward, her mind does not dwell on the tragedy before her (lives lost too early, a good man lost to the darkness every shinobi dips their toe into while running missions, a boy giving up his life for his loved one, lives never having achieved their full potentials); rather, Sakura thinks about the events that led up to it.

Water puddle, ninjas spring. Gauntlets, chains, around Kakashi-sensei. "One down." Tighten, blood. Everywhere. Body parts. Flying. Everywhere. Nauseous. Sick. Frightened. Fear. Fear. Fear. Scared. I'm scared. Kakashi-sensei, I'm scared . . . Where are you? Kakashi . . . sensei . . .

Coming at. Them. Naruto. They. Want Naruto. "Two down." Scratch. Fear. Is. He gone?

Sasuke-kun. Leaps in. Shuriken. Kunai. Chain. Pinned to. Tree. Stuck. Scary. Men. Ninja. Stuck.

Sasuke-kun. Jumps into. The fray. Kick. Bad men. Back. Bad men. Loose. Released. Run. Around Sasuke-kun. And. Naruto too. Sharp. Claws brandished. Running. At her. And. Tazuna.

Naruto. Frightened. She's. Frightened. 'He's coming. I. Have to. Do it.' Still. She leaps. In front. Of. Tazuna. "Stay behind me!" she. Erupts. Holding a. Kunai. In trembling. Hands. Heart. Pumping. Blood rushing. In. Her ears. Inches. Away. Frightened. Scared. I'm scared. Kakashi-sensei, I'm scared . . . Where are you? Kakashi . . . sensei . . .

Sasuke-kun. Leaps in. Between. Arms. Outstretched. A. Body shield.

It was evidently clear from the moment her team had left the village, Tazuna in tow, and had almost immediately after been ambushed by the two missing-nin lurking outside that Sakura is, despite having studied diligently and having attended classes in the Academy for the past six years, is entirely unprepared for the true life of a shinobi - inside and outside of the comforts of the village.

Her mind wandering back to the appearance of those missing-nin, the Demon Brothers Kakashi-sensei had called them, she curses her inattention to her surroundings, her inability to see anything other than him. She has always prided herself on her intelligence - she's pretty damn smart, and she knows it; she always used her high IQ against Ino when the blonde was to insult her abnormally-sized forehead or her less-than-developed figure. But what others have been trying to tell her all along, that her intelligence cannot carry her all the way through a shinobi career, it's been shoved in her face, and she's been doused in metaphorical ice-cold water at the realization. Her intelligence wasn't enough.

And it wasn't that she didn't notice the ridiculously obvious, conspicuous puddle in the otherwise dry dirt; it wasn't that she was unaware of the existence of Water Release jutsu alike the one the Demon Brothers had used to conceal themselves. Such jutsu were, after all, on the Academy syllabus, and she'd read more than enough books and scrolls in her time studying there she knew of it being a thing. The fault was that she had simply disregarded the single, lone puddle they'd encountered on the road since they'd left Konoha, even when it hadn't rained in over a week. She just ignored it, instead fawning after Sasuke-kun and admiring the way he walked, with a comfortable and natural grace (she's still unable to mimic) despite she's fairly certain it was his first time leaving the village, too.

'Speaking of Sasuke-kun,' she thinks to herself as she places the rice-balls she and Tsunami-san made as offering to Zabuza and Haku's spirits, and she glances back at the dark-haired Uchiha in question.

Disbelieving. "Where is Sasuke-kun!?" No. Answer. Realization. Heart. Sinks. Trembling. Run. Find. Sasuke. Kun. Find. Sasuke-kun. Find Sasuke-kun. Found. Him.

Blood. Everywhere. Needles. Embedded. In. Skin.

Wide. Eyes. Realization. Sasuke . . . kun, why . . . why are . . . you . . . not moving? Sasuke . . . kun. Get. Up. Please. Please, Sasuke-kun. Please. Get. Up. Still. Not. Breathing. Realization. Kneel.

"I . . . I always scored 100% on the Ninja Academy Exams . . . memorized over 100 shinobi sayings . . . always . . . correct . . . 'Shinobi Saying #25 . . . No matter what the situation . . . a shinobi must keep emotions on the inside. Mission . . . top priority . . . never show tears.'"

Sobbing. Crying. Begging. Sasuke-kun. Come. Back. Please. Come. Back. Screaming. Crying. Begging. Not. Him. Please. Not. Him.

Sasuke-kun is still looking a little worse for wear, though he is infinitely better than that day on the bridge. His clothing has mostly been patched up, courtesy of Tsunami-san, though there are still bloodstains on his shorts (she assumes there are also stains present on his shirt, but the two similar colors make it impossible for her to tell). His wounds are bandaged - something Tsunami taught Sakura to do in the 2 weeks Team 7 stayed in the Land of Waves for a recuperation period, along with a fairly high mastery of herbs and their many medicinal uses - and he still looks a little uncomfortable standing there. Still, even in his less-than-favorable appearance, his dark, fathomless eyes in her direction is more than enough to make her heart skip a beat and for her face to heat wildly.

Sakura frowns deeply at that realization, frowns at herself, and she looks away, back at the graves the boys had dug (refusing to let her help because 'they didn't want her clean hands to get dirty or for her to get calluses . . . and she's such a delicate, young girl after all' and all that bullshit).

She'd gotten to hold Sasuke-kun after the dome of ice mirrors had been destroyed and the boy, Haku, had died; she'd cradled her crush in her arms and wailed over his cold, still body, but such an action, even as it had warmed her heart, had come at a steep price. Their mission had been to protect Tazuna - that was the only thing she'd been told to do, the only instruction Kakashi-sensei had given to her. And she'd just left him behind.

The moment Naruto didn't give Sakura an answer, the moment she'd seen the look on his face, she forgot her mission, she forgot the orders she'd been given - all she could think about was Sasuke-kun. She ran, and she left Tazuna behind. (Sure, Tazuna had followed, trotted along behind her out of fear for himself and his own well-being, but that didn't excuse her actions.) If Zabuza had sent but one Water Clone after him, she would have single-handedly failed their mission; Kakashi-sensei's injuries and chakra-exhaustion, Sasuke-kun's being turned into a pin-cushion, and even Naruto's bravery and strong words and undeniable determination and strength, it would've all been for nothing. And it would've been all her fault.

Sakura heaves a quiet sigh and shakes her head, only to notice Naruto is trying to sneak a few of the rice-balls to snack on. She smacks his hand, but without any of her usual strength and with none of the usual anger that accompanies such a move behind it.

(Because even Naruto - idiotic, loud-mouthed, dead-last Naruto - had saved the day, had managed to do something important, had been a hero, while she . . . she did nothing. And oh, how it burned.)

"That's bad karma," she hisses, and he laughs nervously, even though she can see the curiosity in his baby-blue eyes; he's noticed she doesn't have nearly the same strength behind the blow - and she's not really angry either - and she's sure he wants to know why. But she doesn't give him a chance to ask (because, if she's being completely honest with herself, she doesn't really know the answer; something's changed, but she's not sure what).

"Kakashi-sensei," the pinkette calls, and with a touch of bitterness, she wonders if he even bothers to look up from his stupid book.

'Cha! How dare he ignore us!?' Inner erupts, but Sakura rather skillfully ignores her inner self's outburst, just in time to hear Kakashi-sensei hum in acknowledgment.

'So he's not ignoring us,' she thinks, and as she takes a moment to plan out what she's going to ask him, her inner self crosses her arms and frowns deeply, in a pessimistic way.

'For now,' she whispers lowly before disappearing.

Still, Sakura does not allow Inner's cryptic words or pessimistic tone to distract her. "Were these two correct about ninja?" she asks, still staring at the graves - but mostly at the one of the boy who had spared Sasuke-kun (Haku, his name was; and she did realize that the boy had deliberately hit non-vital points - only after a few moments of examination once Sasuke-kun had sat up and she was no longer panicked, that is).

Kakashi-sensei sighs, shifting his weight minisculely; her eyes flicker back towards him, noting the movement (she's wary now, ready to defend her back at any moment). "A shinobi isn't supposed to pursue his own goals," the man replies, and Sakura is sure he's noticed her tenseness and the way she responded to his movements - he's not a jōnin for nothing, after all; "becoming the country's tool is most important. It's the same in the Leaf Village."

"Is that what it really means to become a true ninja?" Naruto asks, startling Sakura from her deep observations of her sensei.

The jōnin is acting oblivious to her jade eyes on him, but she knows he can feel the weight of her stare. In an almost morbid way, she wonders if she could break through him, shattering him into pieces or perhaps scorching him beyond recognition, with only her eyes. Somehow, she doubts it, but it's worth a shot.

The blonde huffs. "You know what!? I don't like it!" he explodes, and Sakura silently agrees with him.

(Agreeing with Naruto, who would've thought?)

"You believe that, too?" Sasuke-kun asks, and Sakura notes the way Kakashi-sensei gives the boy a fond, proud look out of the corner of his eye (envy bubbles up, but she does not allow herself to show the nasty emotion).

Kakashi-sensei considers his words for a few moments. "Well . . . each and every ninja has to live while dealing with that issue," he answers finally, "just like Zabuza . . . and that boy."

(Sakura wonders at the pause Kakashi-sensei places between the Mist's missing-nin and the young boy who'd served him, and she considers the possibility guilt is dragging at the man's heart at killing the boy. Perhaps . . . he regrets it, or perhaps . . . it brought back some sour memory from his past. She wonders, but does not say anything aloud.)

Naruto walks forward, then - breaking Sakura out of her thoughts. He stops just in front of Haku's grave and stares at it for a few moments, and she watches as his expression tightens into one of determination. "Okay, I just decided!" he announces loudly, drawing everyone's attention. "I'm going to be a ninja in my own way!"

Kakashi-sensei's eyes widen, and Sakura watches, envy once again rising, as the man's expression fills with a fond pride - a look he has never once awarded her.

Jealousy and a resigned sort of discouragement bubbles up within her, and she bites her lip to hold back the scathing words she'd usually allocate to Inner Sakura. Out of a desire to withhold the less-than-savory parts of her personality, she chews on the inside of her cheek and distracts herself with her thoughts as they walk, though her thoughts are not the pleasant sort, and more of the strange resigned discouragement rises to her awareness in response.

Sakura had had so much pride in herself as a kunoichi before, and she'd had pride in herself as a person for much longer; with Ino's support and encouragement, she'd grown strong, and she'd once thought that since being on a team with Naruto and Sasuke-kun, she'd grown even stronger yet. But now, she isn't so sure.

Sure, she had graduated the Academy with top scores in anything theoretical and based in intelligence and with scores a little higher-than-average in anything physical; she's intelligent, she knows that. She's always been able to think her way around most problems, but after having become a genin, things changed: thinking her way around problems wouldn't make them disappear anymore; suddenly, she was confronted with the issue that her body was not as well-oiled and fine-tuned a machine as her mind was, and since being put on a team with Naruto and Sasuke-kun, she's been confronted with that truth endlessly. She'd always ignored it, though - up until now.

Because on this mission, protecting this bridge-builder, Sakura has realized that to ignore the simple truth that she is pathetic compared to her teammates can no longer be ignored - to do so would be poor for both her health and the health of her teammates. Because the only time any member of her team had glanced her way, it was to ensure that she was still protecting Tazuna - that she hadn't given in like a coward and ran away. They don't trust her, and why would they? She's just a liability.

Because in the fight against Zabuza ("Everyone, get down!" . . . something. Whirls. Overhead. Man standing. On. Blade. Dangerous. He's dangerous. "It will be a little tough . . ." Blood. Red. Eye. Spinning. What. Is. That? Is. That . . .? Orders. Given orders. Protect. Tazuna. Sasuke-kun. Explain. Heart. Pounding. When. Will he. Attack? Disappeared. On top. Of. The water. Hands. Raised. Chakra. Gathering. Gone. Mist. Rising. "8 choices: liver, lungs, spine, collarbone, jugular, brain, kidneys, heart." Fear. Fear. Frightened. I'm scared. Kakashi-sensei. I'm. Scared. Behind. Them. Kakashi-sensei! Clone. Relief. Failure. Behind you! Heart. Pounding. Blood. Everywhere. Naruto. Sasuke-kun. Trembling. I. Can't. Do. Anything.), even Naruto and Sasuke-kun had managed to do something, managed to cooperate and work together in freeing Kakashi-sensei. They fought against Zabuza, too, even though they were both vastly outmatched in both experience and sheer willingness to kill.

But she hadn't managed to do anything; all she'd done through the fight was wait on the shore, a mere kunai drawn and held in trembling hands. All the while, her teammates and sensei were off, doing the works of legends.

Sakura is drawn out of her thoughts by the sound of the bridge builder's gruff voice: "Thanks to you, we've completed the bridge, but . . ." He trails off, sighing. "This is super sad."

'Cha! You don't know sad!' Inner erupts, and Sakura hushes her, listening (information is everything - her mother has taught her that much, at least).

"Thank you for everything," Kakashi-sensei replies diplomatically as Naruto beams at the company of civilians who have gathered at the end of the bridge in order to see them off.

(Sakura silently hopes that she got everything - she'd been moving on autopilot the entire time. And she doubts any of her teammates or her sensei would've noticed - or even thought to remind her - if she left anything behind, so, truly, she hopes.)

Naruto's expression is twisted into a forceful grin - like he's barely withholding tears. "Don't worry!" the boy exclaims loudly. "We'll come to visit!"

'I doubt it,' Sakura thinks to herself scornfully, but she carefully hides her thoughts, not allowing them to play out across her face. She does not want her teammates to know of her innate pessimistic nature.

"You . . . better," Inari whimpers, his bottom lip trembling as his eyes gleam with unshed tears.

Naruto's expression matches Inari's, and he takes a moment of silence to gather himself. "Inari . . .you're sad, right?" he exclaims loudly. "It's all right to cry!"

"I'm not going to cry!" Inari retorts, shouting loudly. "But, Naruto, you can cry, too!"

Abruptly, Naruto spins on his heel, whirling around and walking in the opposite direction; Sakura arches an eyebrow minutely. "Fine . . ." he says quietly. "Later."

"Ah!" Inari calls out, reaching out as though to hold Naruto in place. But Naruto doesn't stop, and the two match devastated expressions, tears rolling down their cheeks and snot leaking from their noses.

'Jeez,' Sakura thinks, eyeing Naruto, 'they're like twins.'

They walk, then, and she thinks, allowing her body to move on autopilot.

She has felt no weaker than these past few days. She has never felt more pathetic. She's never felt so useless - not even when she was marching along in Ino's shadow.

And thinking on that, with those thoughts in mind, an idea starts to come into shape in her mind, blooming from nothingness - a small spark of determination that gradually grows into a flame, flickering and dancing within her with gentle warmth. She'll work on her skills as a ninja, she'll get Sasuke-kun to notice her - but not in the way that he has on this mission, not as something to protect - because they both know that she can't protect herself. She'll get Kakashi-sensei to notice her as more than just dead weight.

She's started to loathe the girl who started the rumors about the type of girl Sasuke-kun prefers - long-hair, slim, pretty, confident - everything Ino insured she was but never received any more recognition than a "Hn. Annoying."

Because Sasuke-kun doesn't need a fan-girl in Team 7. He doesn't need some pretty, little girl standing on the sidelines shouting encouragements at him, telling him how great he is. Because if anything he's done on this mission is to go by, he already knows; his willingness to challenge a ninja who he only knew was incredibly loyal to a renowned missing-nin to a one-on-one battle displays that he's more than aware of his prodigious talents.

What he needs, she realizes with amazing clarity, what allowed him to work so seamlessly with Naruto, as though they'd been teammates for years and despite their constant petty arguing and bickering, is trust. He needs someone he can trust on the team. Because Naruto, with all of his shortcomings, with his lack of knowledge on chakra, with his ignorance on basic thing taught at the Academy, he's proven resilient, determined, strong, and, most of all, trustworthy.

Everything Sakura isn't.

"Hey, Sakura-chan! Hey, hey, are you okay!?" Naruto exclaims suddenly, loudly, and Sakura flinches back from the hand waving extremely close in front of her face.

She looks from the still-waving hand to the person it's attached to, barely restraining another flinch when she sees Naruto's bright blue eyes considerably closer than they should be, considering they're walking -

Wait, they're walking? Since when?

She does her best to look around inconspicuously, figuring that they must have started walking while she was thinking; she knows she tends to zone out when she's really thinking hard. From the look of things, they left the Land of Waves behind a while ago; they're probably closer to Konoha now, rather than the small town they'd come from. She must've been really out of it.

"Sakura-chan?"

Again, Naruto manages to snap her out of her thoughts, and she realizes with a jolt that Naruto is still waiting for an answer to his previous question. And he sounds - and looks - more concerned for her well-being than anyone else since she ended her friendship with Ino; it's nearly painful how jarring that realization is to her.

Sakura bites back her grimace, and, instead, she smiles at the blonde. "I," she chokes on the word but swallows hard and tries again. "I'm fine."

Really, she's not, and she can tell by the disbelieving look on his face that he can tell. Still, though, he plasters a giant grin on his face, tucks his arms behind his head, and nods.

"That's good, Sakura-chan! Believe it!" he exclaims, and she feels a sudden surge of appreciation for him she can't really explain.

For all of the ways that Naruto can annoy her (though if she's honest with herself, she's being a hypocrite because she does the same thing with Sasuke-kun - and her Inner winces at that realization), he can be so incredibly kind and thoughtful.

And so, Sakura decides she'll make an effort. "Naruto," she calls hesitantly, and he turns to look at her, a heartbreakingly hopeful expression on his face.

She's struck by another realization at his expression - was I really that horrible to him? Have I really been that awful?

Inner runs through all of their memories of their interactions with him in an instant and comes up with one solid, definitive answer: yes. And both Sakura and her Inner feel an enormously painful surge of guilt.

We'll fix that, like everything else, Inner promises, and Sakura agrees with a sharp mental nod.

"Yeah, Sakura-chan?" Naruto asks, his voice still so full of barely restrained hope, and she forces herself to smile a bit wider. Because she's going to try - dammit!

"You . . . you did really well on-on the mission," she chokes out. "With, y-you know, Haku and Gato's thugs and . . . stuff."

For a moment, Naruto's expression is totally and absolutely raw and exposed; it's as though, with her simple words, she's stripped him of all his defenses. He seems pleased, obviously, but there is a pained edge to his extreme joy - as if her acknowledgment, something he'd strived for since meeting her, is something he thought totally out of reach and to receive it now shakes his whole world and changes everything he knows. She can identify with him, then.

Though her family is, indeed, complete, there is a deep estrangement between her and her parents, as if they're not quite sure how to respond to her. That metaphorical wall or rift or valley between them has always existed, even when she was a young child, but when she first expressed interest in ninja and then when she said she actually wanted to be a ninja - her parents recoiled and nearly ostracized her.

Sasuke-kun claimed she has no idea what it's like to be alone, but she thinks it's him who has no idea; you're never lonelier than when you're alone in a crowd of people. Parents who don't love you are no better than no parents at all.

The expression fades from Naruto's face and is replaced by a grin that's somehow more blinding than the first. "Thanks!" he shouts, and she's thankful to him for not mentioning - or even acknowledging - her awkwardness. She knows that if she were talking to Sasuke-kun, he'd probably taunt her.

She hears Sasuke-kun snort, and she prepares to be wounded by whatever cutting remark he's winding up to unleash. But Naruto saves her. Again.

Cutting Sasuke-kun off and talking over him, Naruto rattles off a "I'm one step closer to Hokage, believe it!" and awards her another blinding grin. He seems totally unaware of the fact that he completely cut off Sasuke-kun and talked over him, but she has a sneaking suspicion he isn't so oblivious - and maybe he did that on purpose.

As her smile widens a smidge, Sasuke-kun frowns deeply at Naruto's interruption, and he huffs and looks away.

Sakura falls back into her thoughts, then, but not before allowing the boys to pass her by so that only Kakashi-sensei is behind her.

Throughout the entire mission, Naruto, Sasuke-kun, and Kakashi-sensei protected her. They didn't let her do anything! They held her back and told her to watch Tazuna while they went off and did the work of legends. And she, being the trusting fool she was, went right along with it.

Rage burns in her chest at the unfairness of it all, but she pushes the emotion away, choosing to keep a clear head. She needs to plan.

She wants to be stronger, to become someone her teammates can count on. But she doesn't have Kakashi-sensei's support - he's only ever awarded Sasuke-kun that - and she doesn't have a nearly endless supply of chakra - like Naruto does. She doesn't have a teacher, really; for all of the pomp and circumstance Kakashi-sensei has, he has never taught her anything - other than the fact that she has good chakra control.

Wait, chakra control. There's a library near the Academy - she spent a lot of her time there as a child. She can check out books and scrolls there on techniques - maybe she can even find a teacher there. And if not there, then why not go to the Hokage? He may be too busy to teach her, but maybe he can suggest someone to her that she can learn from so she isn't in this position ever again.

She won't be weak.

And as for her parents . . . well, she'll cross that bridge when she comes to it.

Recalling the lecture at the Academy on the Will of Fire and what makes a ninja strive to be the best version of themselves they can be, Sakura recalls a particular word - a particular phrase. Looking up at the sky, she makes a vow on the Hokage Mountain and on the fire burning in her chest. 'I won't bend, I won't cave, and I won't break. I will be a proud kunoichi - a proud shinobi, and I will be useful to my team. I will make them watch my back. That is my nindo, my ninja way.'


Finished with the first chapter, and whoo! That took forever. Borrowed a bit from Spring, but, be assured, Diamond will take a very different path from Spring. For one, Sakura doesn't have a clan in this one - just two asshole civilian parents and more determination than is probably healthy.

Anyway, so because I don't want Diamond to be too similar to Pulling My Weight, though once we get more into the story I don't think I'll have to worry about that, Genma will not be the one to find Sakura-chan in the library. In fact, I'm not sure anyone will actually find her in the library; she may have to go to the Hokage to get her new trainer, but we'll see. ;)

And I'm not going to spoil who it is, though you are more than welcome to guess.

Hint: He is a tokubetsu jōnin.

That's it for today, dear readers! I've gotta go!

Ja ne!

~thestrengthofacherryblossom