I'm back with a small oneshot this time ! My other Fics are on hiatus till after the exams. I just wrote this one because I needed a breather and I HAD to do SOMETHING creative that didn't involve glue, paint, or glitter paste =.=
Anyhow, I just want to point out, that I have nothing against the so called "Sweet Valley" type of girls, live and let live. But sometimes they annoy me. And I'm sure they annoy others too. So I got to thinking. Suppose we put Dark Link together with one of those girls…
You see the genius here?

Hope you enjoy; I am a review whore.

Sweet Valley Hyrule

'Won't she ever shut up ?!!!!' Dark Link desperately thought to himself.
About a week ago, he had found himself wandering around Hyrule field aimlessly.
Just when he had been about to turn back, he had seen a girl sitting on a rock, alone, wearing a light, slightly see-through, white silk dress.
Her long blonde hair was softly flowing in the wind and her bright blue eyes where cast downwards. She looked so sad, so lost. He had approached her and they had struck up a conversation.
As it turned out, her boyfriend had dumped her and she was all alone.
He had taken her home, to his place by Lake Hylia, they had spent a wonderful night together and he had expected she would leave and never return, as all good one night stands should be.
Yeah…no.
Somewhere, high up in that sky, a cruel Goddess was looking down at him, laughing and her name was Karma.
The girl…was a girl. A real girl. Not just physically, mentally too. It was like the Three Goddesses had taken every stereotypical aspect of womanhood and had combined them to form the creature that now sat beside him.
He had watched her, sleeping sweetly and silently, that morning after.
But if he had known what was going to come, the second she woke up, he would have smothered her with a pillow.
Heck, he was close to smothering himself with a pillow! Since that fateful moment of her awaking he had heard everything, from the way she did her nails, to how Heather, Sussie and she were totally gonna kick ass at Hyrule's next New Years ball.
"And then we, like, went for a moccacino. But nonfat, sugar free no whip, of course. I would, like, totally freak out if someone gave me, like, carbs, you know. I would totally kill myself if I, like, couldn't fit in my ball gown anymore!"
'If you don't kill yourself, I will!' the young shadow thought. He asked himself for the umpteenth time what he had done to deserve all this.
Except following Ganondorf's orders, trying to kill the Hero of time and aiding in the destruction of Hyrule.

Even destroying the Earth itself wouldn't deserve this Punishment!
'I she still talking?'
Yes, she is…
'Damnit, I'm starting to see why her boyfriend left her in Hyrule field. This has to end. This has to stop!'
"And so, like, she totally tried to steal my boyfriend, but then I like, totally called her a biatch and she was like 'uh, excuuuuse me?' and then I like totally bitchslapped her"
'I wonder if she would shut up if I were to decapitate her?'
"Hey...cool sword! Like, what are you gonna do with it?"
'Oh you'll see. Just...hold still'

Thanks to Lady Midday for the idea and inspiration ^^