Title: Unlikely Partners
Summary: Coda to "Flesh and Blood." Kejal & Donik, P/T.
Rating: T
Kejal breathed a deep sigh of relief. Captain Janeway was going to let them go.
This ship was the only real home she'd ever known in her brief existence. Though the prospect of visiting Voyager had been tempting, she didn't relish the idea of being trapped on Voyager's holodeck forever.
On this ship, holoprojectors were installed throughout all sections, and she could move about freely. And now that the portable photonic field generators were working, she could go anywhere the generators were located.
She was grateful that Donik had offered to stay, though part of her still felt uneasy about having only an organic for company, and a Hirogen organic at that.
But observing Lieutenant Torres and the Doctor's relationship had shown her that organics and photonics could co-exist peacefully and even develop close, mutually beneficial relationships with each other. The Doctor had been very concerned about Lieutenant Torres and had used his medical skills to heal her injuries. And Lieutenant Torres had the engineering skills to repair the Doctor's holo-matrix. From everything that Kejal had seen of their interactions, they respected each other and treated each other well.
The Doctor had also made it clear that he didn't feel oppressed by the organics on Voyager. He'd said that he was a member of the crew and had rights and privileges. He considered the organics his colleagues and friends.
Maybe she and Donik could learn to trust each other that much too.
She was glad she'd had the opportunity to get to know Lieutenant Torres. It had made her start to question her previous beliefs about organics. She'd learned so much from Lieutenant Torres in such a short time, and she'd grown to respect and admire her deeply. It meant a lot to her that Lieutenant Torres had told Captain Janeway that she and Donik had both proven that they could be trusted.
After Captain Janeway and Lieutenant Torres transported back to Voyager, Kejal was painfully aware of how quiet the ship seemed without the other holograms.
She'd been surrounded by other holograms ever since she'd been liberated, and they had been the only family she'd ever known. They had banded together and pooled their resources to survive, and they'd dared to hope that they could even someday thrive.
The others were stored in the ship's database, but she knew they couldn't risk reinitializing them until their programs had been altered to make them less violent.
"Do you really think you'll be able to reprogram the other holograms?" she asked Donik.
"I think so," he confirmed. "But I'll need your help."
Her surprise must have shown on her face, because he added, "I don't know them like you do. You'll have a better idea of what modifications we need to make."
It seemed like a daunting task. "I don't know if I can make those kinds of decisions," she said uncertainly.
"Why not?"
"It's such a big responsibility. I mean, what if the changes I suggest aren't enough and they try to take back control of the ship? Or what if the changes are too much and their personalities become so different that they're not even them anymore?"
"Then we'll keep trying," Donik replied. "Eventually we'll be able to bring them all back online," he reassured her.
"All except Iden," she said sadly. "His program is unrecoverable."
Kejal felt a deep sense of loss.
"He's gone because of me. If only I'd stood up to him earlier… I could have taken the field generators offline instead of transporting them all to the surface. I could have prevented the massacre and saved his program too."
"I know how you feel," Donik said with a heavy sigh. "I followed my Alpha's orders even though I knew the modifications to the holograms would most likely lead to his death. I feel responsible for all of the deaths I caused."
"It's not the same," she said impatiently. "Hirogen hunters are prepared to die during a hunt. That's the risk they take. And you followed your Alpha out of fear of what he would do to you if you didn't. We all followed Iden by choice. He liberated us, took care of us. He asked for our loyalty, and we gave it to him freely. We depended on him."
Her voice cracked. "He gave me a name. A new existence. I thought he would always be there to protect us. But now he's gone."
"Were you in love with him?" he asked gently.
Kejal turned away, feeling conflicted. She didn't even know how to begin to answer that question.
Certainly she'd felt grateful that he'd rescued her from the hunters. She'd admired and respected him tremendously, and he'd been an attractive and charismatic man.
But did all of that add up to love? She wasn't sure.
For so long she'd followed Iden's orders without question, assuming that he knew best.
She'd only tried to object when he'd ordered Weiss to arm the forward torpedoes and target the warp core of the Nuu'bari ship. The Doctor and Lieutenant Torres had also tried to stop him and Weiss, but Iden had refused to listen.
Kejal had felt deeply disturbed, because as Lieutenant Torres had correctly pointed out, they had already liberated the holograms and there was no reason to destroy the ship and kill the two organics on board. Especially since they all knew that antagonizing organics would only invite further retaliation.
It had made her think that Iden had become overly suspicious and fanatical.
Or maybe he always had been, and she just hadn't been able to see it clearly before.
"I had strong feelings for Iden. But I don't know if I could call it love, exactly," she said quietly. "I'm not sure if I know what love is."
Donik nodded sympathetically.
"Lieutenant Torres understood," Kejal continued. "She said it was easy to confuse feelings of admiration, gratitude and loyalty for an attractive leader with love."
"Was she speaking from personal experience?" Donik asked.
"Yes. She said it happened to her before, with the leader of her Maquis resistance cell. A man named Chakotay."
"Commander Chakotay is Voyager's first officer," Donik said with some surprise. "Second in command to Captain Janeway. But Lieutenant Torres is married to Lieutenant Paris."
Kejal looked at him with interest. Lieutenant Torres hadn't mentioned that. She supposed there hadn't been any reason for her to do so.
"She said she idolized Chakotay for a long time, until she discovered he wasn't perfect, and that following any leader unconditionally is dangerous. I suppose she was able to find real love after realizing that."
"It is dangerous to follow orders blindly," he agreed. "I only started to realize just how dangerous when I was on Voyager."
"What made you realize that?"
"Lieutenant Torres figured out we had deliberately modified your programs and that you weren't actually malfunctioning. I was forced to tell them I had made the modifications myself, under orders from my Alpha. After Lieutenant Torres asked me if that made it right, I realized I needed to start taking responsibility for my own actions."
Kejal nodded. "Lieutenant Torres encouraged me to follow my own conscience and not just automatically defer to Iden's decisions."
It was the complete opposite of what Donik was used to. Hirogen hierarchy was very structured. It was common for an Alpha to strike a lower-ranking hunter for even disagreeing with him.
Being on Voyager had been an eye-opening experience for him in so many ways, and he had been pleasantly surprised to find that his technical skills were valued by Captain Janeway and her crew. Among the Hirogen, he'd always had a lowly status compared to the hunters. But on Voyager he'd had the opportunity to contribute his knowledge and expertise, and they'd readily accepted him as part of the team.
Though the Starfleet officers had a hierarchical structure too, it was for order and coordination of teamwork rather than domination.
He'd observed that their relationships were egalitarian and cooperative instead of competitive. Captain Janeway actively solicited the support and input of her senior officers before making the final decisions. The crewmembers listened to each other, took turns speaking and encouraged one another. They even allowed the Doctor, a hologram, to share his opinions.
Even when they disagreed, they did it respectfully and without fear of retaliation or ridicule.
Donik wondered if their society was so different because they allowed both genders to participate equally. On Voyager, males and females lived and worked side by side.
By contrast, Hirogen society was strictly gender-segregated, and he'd never had much extended contact with females of any species before.
From observing Lieutenant Paris and the other males on Voyager, he'd been struck by how they could be strong and assert themselves without getting aggressive. They didn't consider it cowardly to seek alternatives to violence.
"I wish I could have seen Voyager," Kejal said at last, with a trace of wistfulness.
"Their way of life is very different from ours," Donik acknowledged. "They are explorers who seek to understand other species and learn from them. And in many ways their technology is far more advanced than ours. I was fortunate to have the opportunity to work in Main Engineering and learn from Lieutenant Torres and the other engineers."
"Is Lieutenant Paris an engineer too?"
"No, he's a pilot. An exceptionally skilled pilot. He was able to keep Voyager in the Hirogen vessel's ion wake. That's how we escaped detection by the hunters."
"Oh."
"And he's also a field medic," Donik continued. "He treated my injuries when I was first transported to Voyager. I was too afraid of holograms at the time to let the Doctor treat me."
"What's he like?" she asked.
Donik had to think about that for a moment. "He's human. Physically he resembles Weiss – tall, lean, athletic – but with lighter-colored hair and eyes. He also wears a red uniform. He's not violent like Weiss, though. He's kind and compassionate."
None of the Voyager crew seemed inclined towards violence, except as a last resort.
"He must have been very worried about Lieutenant Torres," she remarked.
"He was quite determined to rescue her," Donik confirmed. "When I first asked to stay on Voyager, Captain Janeway refused because she didn't want to antagonize my superiors. But Lieutenant Paris spoke up on my behalf because he thought I could help them get his wife back."
"He was right. They probably wouldn't have been able to do it without your help. Iden wasn't inclined to let her go, and she could have been killed when the hunters attacked our ship."
"That's why Voyager followed the Hirogen vessels and disabled them after we found your ship. But Voyager's shields were damaged during the fight and couldn't withstand the radiation in the nebula, so Lieutenant Paris, Commander Chakotay and Lieutenant Commander Tuvok had to take the Delta Flyer – their shuttle – to rescue her."
"I'm glad they were reunited."
"Yes. They seemed very happy when I saw them together in Sickbay," he told her. The Doctor had checked him again before he'd transported back to the holograms' ship, to make sure he had properly recovered from his previous injuries.
"What are they like when they're together?" Kejal asked.
She seemed intrigued by the relationships that people on Voyager had with each other, which he supposed made sense. They were the only positive role models she had.
Donik reflected on what he had observed. "They seem deeply attached to each other. They're very affectionate, and they regard each other as equal partners."
It was very different from how Hirogen males and females related to each other. Hirogen didn't usually engage in close physical contact or gaze at each other with tenderness.
But Lieutenant Paris had been able to express care and concern for his wife without it diminishing him in any way.
"It must be wonderful to have a relationship like that," Kejal said. "I hope someday I'll get to experience that too."
Donik had to admit he had been intrigued by their relationship too. He didn't know much about love either. He was not a hunter, and he had no relics, no trophies to proclaim his status. No self-respecting Hirogen woman would ever be interested in him.
Perhaps he would never experience the kind of relationship that Lieutenants Paris and Torres shared, but at least he had companionship with Kejal.
Kejal seemed to value his qualities and technical skills, and she understood why he'd chosen the path that he had.
They'd both found the courage to stand up for what they believed was right, even if it meant they would be ostracized by their people.
"So where should we start on the modifications?" she asked.
"We can start by looking at how your behavioral subroutines have changed in the past few days."
"My behavioral subroutines? Why?"
"You've adapted beyond your programming," he pointed out. "I programmed you all to be as vicious as the hunters. But you chose to take the other holograms off-line instead of seeking revenge against us."
"I'm not a hunter," she replied. "I don't want to hunt anyone for revenge. I just wanted to be left in peace."
"I'm not a hunter either," Donik said. "Before the Hirogen encountered Voyager, that's all I ever thought I could be. Even though I knew I'd never be any good at it. I'm glad that I've had the chance to become an engineer instead."
Kejal nodded. "I think I'd like to be an engineer too. Lieutenant Torres told me, 'It may be the warriors who get the glory, but it's the engineers who build societies.'"
He looked thoughtful. "We'll need many more engineers than warriors if we want to build our own society, then."
"Then we'd better program some more engineers," she said with a smile.
He smiled back, feeling more hopeful than he had in a long time.
The Hirogen hunters and bloodthirsty holograms had only brought death and destruction to themselves and to each other. The warriors would forever be at each other's throats in a senseless, unending cycle of violence and retribution.
Donik and Kejal were both tired of all the fighting and ready for a new purpose in life. To explore all the other aspects of their existence. To connect with others instead of struggling for dominance.
They'd turned their backs on their peoples' violent ways and had to find their own way now, but they weren't alone. They had each other.
And sometime soon, in the very near future, they could build a new community together.
Back on Voyager, Tom and B'Elanna were indeed happy to be reunited and finally alone in their quarters.
He hadn't let her out of his sight since she'd been rescued.
"I'm all right," she repeated. "It wasn't the first time I've been held hostage by an unstable hologram. I'm used to it by now."
"That's not funny."
Suddenly it was very clear to him why she often seemed annoyed whenever he tried to make a joke about a situation that was no laughing matter.
"I knew they wouldn't hurt me. They needed me to fix their programs and install their generator."
"The Hirogen were trying to destroy their ship," he reminded her. "You could have been killed."
"That's why I had to help the holograms until you could rescue me."
It was even worse now that they'd both decided to discontinue their contraceptive injections and try to have a baby. He couldn't imagine how he'd cope if she were carrying their child and in danger.
"And what if you'd been pregnant?" he blurted out before he could stop himself.
He could tell by the expression on her face that the possibility hadn't occurred to her.
"Well, I'm not, so we don't have to worry about that."
"Are you sure?"
"Of course I'm sure. You were there when the Doctor was treating me in Sickbay. He would have told us."
"You have to be more careful from now on."
"It wasn't like I had a choice," she said irritably. "I was unconscious when they abducted me."
"I meant in general. No more orbital skydiving or hand-to-hand combat with Cardassians on the holodeck. No more re-creating near-death experiences or refusing life-saving medical treatments because of moral objections. No more volunteering for Borg assimilation."
"You're one to talk. You take unnecessary risks all the time."
"I'm not the one who'll be carrying the baby," he retorted. "When you're pregnant, even routine tasks could be risky. Even going on away missions."
She glared at him. "I'm not even pregnant yet, and already you're acting like a tyrant!"
"A tyrant?!" he sputtered indignantly. "That's unfair, and you know it! I'm only looking out for your best interests."
"I can take care of myself! I don't need you telling me what I can and can't do!"
"I was just trying to point out that everything will be different when you're pregnant. You'll have to make some changes."
"Don't you think I know that already?! After all, I'm the one who'll be dealing with the fatigue, the weight gain, the morning sickness, the hormonal changes. I'm the one who'll be crawling around all over the ship in the Jefferies tubes, trying to wedge my pregnant body under consoles and panels to repair ODN junctions, ruptured plasma conduits, fused power relays, and who knows what else. The last thing I'd want to do is cram myself into one of those narrow shuttle seats that were never designed to fit a pregnant woman!"
Tom blinked at her tirade. "Isn't it kind of early to think about all that?" he asked. "How would you know what that's like?"
"Because I've experienced it before," she snapped.
"What are you talking about?"
"On the holodeck. In the Hirogen World War II simulation."
His mind reeled.
How could he have forgotten?
Waking up on the holodeck after their neural interfaces had been disabled, they'd had no memory of how they had gotten there, what had happened or how much time had passed.
The first thing he'd seen was B'Elanna, heavily pregnant.
And all he could think was, Is it mine?
Worse, What if it's not mine?
The buried memories began resurfacing all over again. The helplessness, the rage.
For weeks after, they'd both struggled with the residual trauma to their minds and bodies.
He'd wanted nothing more than to forget.
He'd resorted to his usual strategy: escapism on the holodeck, where everything was under his control. Where he could avoid confronting his feelings.
Unable to tell her all that was truly bothering him, he'd pushed her away.
And almost lost her.
Because all that time she'd been doing the same. Only she'd been running the most dangerous holoprograms she could find with the safety protocols disengaged. Occasionally at first, then more frequently until she'd nearly killed herself.
"Maybe we should reconsider," she said at last.
His heart nearly stopped.
"What?"
"We're both senior officers, and we have so many responsibilities. How are we going to take care of a baby? Maybe we rushed into this decision."
He knew he had to tread carefully or all his dreams of having a family would go up in smoke.
"We don't have to decide that right now," he said hastily. "Like you said, Klingon-human conception is difficult, and it could take a while. It's been a long day for both of us. Why don't we get some dinner and a good night's sleep, and we can talk about it more tomorrow."
She stared at him for a long moment then finally nodded, to his relief.
As they sat down and began eating dinner, Tom mentally berated himself.
He'd intended to tell her how much she meant to him and how worried he'd felt, not lecture her. But somehow it had all gotten messed up.
They both had doubts about bringing a child into the world, but she was far more ambivalent than he was.
He understood why. If they had a child together, she would be more vulnerable, more dependent on him, and he knew that frightened her. After all, her father had walked out on her and her mother and had never looked back.
He'd never leave her of his own volition, but life in the Delta Quadrant was hazardous.
There were too many unknowns, and they'd often disagreed on what constituted acceptable risk.
He had to concede that he was a thrill-seeker, but he also tended to hesitate more when it came to high risk of bodily harm or injury.
Overall, B'Elanna feared her own mortality less than he did.
Klingons didn't fear death the way humans did, and even though she had rejected much of her Klingon heritage, those beliefs were still irrevocably ingrained in her.
He really hadn't meant to start criticizing her. He'd only felt angry and frustrated about the unexpected dangers that he couldn't control.
Why couldn't he just say the words that she actually wanted to hear? Loving, tender words that came from his heart.
He wanted to, but the words always seemed to get stuck in his throat.
They didn't speak much for a while, and when they did, they kept to safer topics, like the repairs that still had to be made.
"So what happened here after the holograms abducted me?" she finally asked.
"After main power was restored and essential systems were repaired, Donik helped us follow the Hirogen vessels without being detected. I think he felt guilty."
B'Elanna made a face. "It was his fault. He's the one who re-programmed the holograms."
"I know. But as the captain said, there's plenty of blame to go around."
"He's a skilled holoprogrammer. I have to give him that. They were the most sophisticated holograms I've ever seen."
"Even compared to the Doctor?"
"In some ways, yes. Iden was very persuasive. He even had me believing in their cause."
Tom was shocked. "What?"
"He told me they only wanted to find a new home, where they'd be safe from the Hirogen."
"And you actually believed that?"
"For a while, I did. But then Iden showed his true colors, and I realized that Donik had been telling the truth when he said they'd been programmed to be as vicious as the Hirogen."
"Not to mention convincing liars. And cagey military strategists."
She shrugged. "It's not too surprising when you think about it. Their original programming already included training in tactics and military strategy. Iden's program was based on a member of the Bajoran militia, and most of the other holograms were modeled on Starfleet officers. Kejal was one of the few civilians."
"She's the one who helped you?"
"Yes. I managed to convince her to shut down the holograms and end the massacre, then reactivate the Doctor to stop Iden, who had the mobile emitter."
"I'm glad you were able to get through to her."
"She understood that the Hirogen would never leave them alone if they kept fighting. Thankfully, she found the courage to choose a different path."
"Just like Donik."
"I suppose," she grudgingly conceded.
"It's a good thing they have each other, then. Otherwise it'd be very lonely for both of them."
"They're an unlikely pair," she mused.
"So are we," he pointed out. "But we make a great team. Maybe they will too."
"I hope so."
"Who knows? Maybe they'll even fall in love and get married like we did," he joked.
"A Cardassian hologram and a Hirogen?" she said doubtfully.
"Sure. Why not? Organics have been having relationships with holograms since the first holograms were created."
She snorted. "'Relations,' maybe, but not relationships."
"It's different with a sentient hologram, who's actually capable of having a relationship. You know that. And sometimes the best partnerships are between two people who complement each other. Like you and me."
To his relief, she smiled at that.
"You're such a romantic, Tom," she said, patting him on the arm. There was exasperation in her tone, but affection too.
He took her hand in his and squeezed it gently.
Suddenly it seemed so easy to say what was truly in his heart, and the words came pouring out.
"B'Elanna, I'm sorry about earlier. I wasn't trying to control you or tell you what to do. I was only upset because I was so worried about you."
"I was worried too," she admitted. "I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to convince Kejal to go against Iden's orders before the Hirogen blew up the ship."
"I love you, B'Elanna. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you. I'm so glad you're safe."
Her expression softened even further. "I love you, too, Tom. And I know you're not trying to control me. I'm sorry I got so mad. It just… scares me to think about all the changes we'll have to make if I get pregnant," she confessed.
"It scares me too."
They both valued their independence and were still learning to accommodate each other.
But if they were going to have a baby, their decisions had to be made together.
"I worry about you too," she finally said. "You volunteer for away missions all the time, and you have a penchant for heroics."
"I know. I'm going to work on changing that. All we can do is minimize the risk. To ourselves, and to our baby."
She nodded. "So we're in agreement, we'll both try to avoid away missions and other potentially dangerous situations as much as possible from now on?"
"Yeah. And let's hope there won't be any more abductions, by holograms or anyone else, now that we've seen the last of the Hirogen and the hologram ship for good."
"Let's hope so."
He hugged her tightly, and she hugged him back.
And just like that, they were back in synch again.
The change in mood was palpable.
He wasn't sure he'd ever get completely used to her mercurial temper.
Though to be fair, her volatility in recent weeks could be partly attributed to her fluctuating hormone levels.
To be honest, he'd been feeling a little unpredictable himself.
It was the first time in their adult lives that they hadn't been on contraceptive injections, and the Doctor had told them to expect subtle but noticeable changes to their physiology.
They'd always enjoyed physical intimacy with each other, but he felt more attuned to her than he ever had before.
Maybe he was just responding to her cues.
Or maybe it just excited him to know that every time they made love now, they could create a baby together.
She wound her arms around his neck as he hugged her closer.
"I suppose a sentient hologram could be an adequate companion, but I still prefer a partner who's flesh and blood," she told him. "Especially one whose flesh and blood are as delectable as yours," she purred, nipping at his earlobe.
He pulled back slightly to look into her eyes.
"You took the words right out of my mouth," he murmured huskily, just before his lips captured hers.
The End!
Author's Endnote: This episode has so many great quotes. I wanted to intersperse them throughout the story but couldn't get it to work without interrupting the flow of the narrative. Below are the quotes I used as inspiration:
"They've both proven that they can be trusted, Captain."
"I don't suppose I have a right to tell either of you how to live your lives. All I can do is hope that you'll consider the consequences of your actions."
"She won't be alone. I reprogrammed these holograms once, and it caused suffering on both sides. I'd like a chance to undo some of the damage."
"Iden's program is unrecoverable. The rest of the holograms are intact in the database."
"This is the leader you admire so much?"
"Iden did what he thought was necessary."
"Do you believe it was necessary?"
"It wasn't my decision."
"Why does Iden get to make all the decisions? You can take control."
"How?"
"You're the engineer, remember? Take Iden offline."
"With all due respect, Captain, I'd like to get my wife back in one piece. We can use all the help we can get."
"And that makes it right?"
"You don't have to be a part of this."
"It may be the warriors who get the glory, but it's the engineers who build societies. Don't forget that."
