Clash of the Gods
By Moonlit Aura
And Okami Amaterasu looked to the heavens and saw the light of a constellation.
And she saw that the constellation was in the shape of the Ninetails. She did not want to release the evil and turned to leave.
And the gaming Gods spoke, saying, "Oh Okami Amaterasu, why hast thou not freed the constellation?"
And Amaterasu replied, "Because it's Ninetails. And if I free her, we will have to fight."
And the Gods replied, "No it isn't."
And Amaterasu looked at the gaming Gods as if they were crazy. "Yes, it is. See? There's the nine tails and everything." And Amaterasu proceeded to count the tail.
And the Gods said, "We shall not be denied. Restore the constellation to its former glory, or we will smite thee."
And Amaterasu relpied, "Fine, smite me, but then you'll have to fight Ninetails yourselves."
And the Gods pouted and attempted to reason with the wolf, who stuffed her paws in her ears and hummed annoying music.
And the Gods saw that Amaterasu would not surrender, and they agreed to call on the most powerful force known.
And the Gods spoke, saying, "Oh Okami Amaterasu, if you will not obey us, we shall summon the most powerful source known."
And Amaterasu, having removed her paws from her ears, stared at the gaming Gods in horror. "You wouldn't!"
And the Gods called upon the all-powerful being known as the Director.
And Kamiya-san spoke, saying, "Why hast thou called me, gaming Gods? I had just started my tuna sandwich, and now it is ruined." And he pointed to the ruined tuna sandwich on the ground.
And the Gods spoke, saying, "Oh, Mr. Director, Okami Amaterasu refuses to free the constellation."
And Amaterasu spoke, saying, "It's Ninetails. Freeing it would be stupid. Which is, of course, the reason these bozos are making me do it."
And Kamiya-san spoke, saying, "That makes sense. What should the villain be freed?"
And the Gods, in desperation, spoke, saying, "But Mr. Director! If Amaterasu does not free Ninetails, the Plot will not continue!"
And Kamiya-san said, "That changes everything!" and began to explain to Amaterasu why she should free Ninetails, using threats of replacement and suing.
And eventually Amaterasu agreed with a sulk, but only after Kamiya-san threatened her retirement benefits.
And the Gods departed in triumph.
And Kamiya-san departed, but only after Amaterasu made him a new tuna sandwich.
And Amaterasu freed the Ninetails, and the plot continued, and she was eventually killed, while Ninetails laughed manically.
…Okay, not really.
But don't tell the gaming Gods that.
Yeaaaah… I offer no excuse… Just review.
