A/N: The more realistic version. Harder to write and not as fluffy Tiva, but it'll end well, I promise.
She leaned against the partition that separated what used to be her desk from the windows on the wall, staring at him. He looked the same and yet different from the last time she had seen him. A little older perhaps – he didn't need to know that – and he might have put on some weight – he didn't need to know that either – but the biggest change was in his eyes. It was a change only she could see because only she had broken past every barrier Anthony DiNozzo put up to prevent others from getting in too close. He looked happy to anyone else, but she could see that they lacked just a bit of the customary sparkle. As for her, her skin was a little darker and her accent was a little thicker. Her clothing was slightly different too. Watching him for a last, fleeting moment, she cleared her throat. He looked up at her, jaw going slack. Standing up, he walked over to her slowly.
Swallowing hard, he finally spoke. "You're…you're really here."
She nodded, still unsure of how to approach the conversation. "I am back."
"For good?"
"I hope so."
Tony gave her a smile, searching for something to say to break the growing awkwardness but before he could speak up, McGee walked in.
He wasn't sure he was really seeing what his eyes told his brain they were. "Ziva?!"
Tony and Ziva jumped and turned his way and Ziva grinned. "McGee!" She began to walk towards him and he met her halfway, engulfing her in a giant hug.
"What are you doing here? Is everything alright?"
"Everything is fine, McGee. I am…back."
"Like back back?"
"If you are wondering if I am back for good, yes."
McGee smiled wide. "Yes!" Noticing that someone had walked up behind her, he smiled wider. Before he could say anything, the someone spoke up.
"Ziver."
McGee's smile softened, seeing Ziva's eyes light up at the sound of his voice as she turned to him.
"Gibbs." Without a second thought she strode over to him, hugging him hard.
"Nice to have ya back, kid."
"It is nice to be back." Looking towards her old desk, she noticed it was now being used. No surprise really, since it had been a year since she left NCIS. Nodding towards it, she asked, "where is…?" she trailed off, realizing she did not know the name of the agent who had taken her place.
"Special Agent Ellie Bishop. Sent her to go interview someone a while ago. She should be back soon."
McGee piped up. "It's been a rough case. Remember one of your first cases, Ziva, when you and Tony went undercover as married assassins?"
Ziva nodded and barely made eye contact with Tony, simultaneously remembering the kiss that night and the one at the airport just a year ago. She turned back to look at McGee.
"Well, it's basically that again, except not."
Ziva raised any eyebrow at his description, or lack of it.
"We know who the bad guys are this time – at least we thought we did – but we don't know who the couple is. We have reason to believe that they are actually the bad guys, or at least the ones in charge. We were going to send a team undercover as the couple, but we're having trouble finding someone who'd work."
Ziva looked over at Gibbs, trying hard to hide the slight jump caused by finding Tony closer. She knew Tony saw it by the way he quirked an eyebrow at her, but if Gibbs noticed, he let it go. "Why not send Agent Bishop with someone?"
Tony crossed his arms and fielded the question. "McGee and Bishop have already interviewed the bad guys – the known ones – and it uh, didn't go so well. We can't send either of them back in without risking compromising the mission. I want to go in, but I don't have someone to go with." Suddenly, he stopped. Glancing over at Gibbs, he gave him a look. "Boss?"
Gibbs stared at him for a moment. After a couple of seconds, he nodded his consent.
"Why don't you come, Ziva? You used to be an agent, you know how all of this works."
"Isn't that against the rules?"
"When have we ever played strictly by the rules?"
Gibbs spoke up. "It's up to you, Ziver."
She mulled it over for a moment, briefly recalling Parsons, Bodnar, and the mess surrounding her father's death. Taking a deep breath, she agreed. "I'll do it." Nobody else needed to know that this was as much about spending time alone with Tony as it was catching the bad guys. Not that she didn't want to catch these guys, but after a year apart, she wanted to spend as much time with Tony as possible. If their earlier time alone was any indication, they had some talking to do.
Twenty-four hours later found Tony and Ziva in a hotel room, similar to their first undercover mission years ago. Knowing they had to act the part because they weren't sure if they were being watched, Ziva knew their act had to begin as soon as the bellhop left the room. She wanted to talk before things got too heated though. Currently, Tony was paying the bellhop. She came up right behind him so that when he turned around, he found himself chest to chest with his "wife". She gave him a look that sent shivers down his spine. She sniffed him.
"You smell. Care for a shower?" she looked up at him suggestively.
He smiled, a little taken aback. "Anything for the lady."
With that Ziva grabbed his tie and yanked him down to her so she could kiss him. They slowly backed in to the bathroom and as soon as the door was shut Ziva dropped the act and backed away fast, leaving a slightly confused Tony against the door. She turned on the shower to make it seem as if they were taking a shower, just in case any cameras potentially in the other room could pick up sound
"Before we do this…we need to talk, Tony. I figured there would be no cameras in here."
Tony ran a hand through his hair knowing this talk was coming but dreading all the same. Of course it came in a bathroom. He pushed off the door, bracing himself on the counter with his hands on either side of the sink. The scene was eerily similar to the one in the NCIS building after Somalia.
Taking a deep breath he finally spoke. "Ziva…I told you how I felt. I showed you. I came across the world for you. I wanted you to come back with me, promised that I could and would change for you. I know why you wanted to stay, but it still hurt. I meant it when I said getting on that plane was the 'hardest 180 of my life'." Hanging his head, he reached into his pocket and pulled out her necklace. "I've kept this in my desk since that day, but I grabbed it before we came, hoping to give it back." Glancing over at her, he saw tears threatening to spill. "My feelings haven't changed since that day, Ziva. I want to show you that I can change for you."
"Before you say anything else, let me say what I have to say, please? Then we can go from there."
He nodded.
"In Israel, I did some digging. I visited my mother's grave, and Tali's. I tried to come to terms with my life there, and I did. Someday, I may tell you. For now, know that I trust you, and that I know my past will still haunt me at times and I want you there to help me when it does. I spent a majority of the past twelve months reconciling the past and the present. I tried to figure out my future and I found that I just can't do it without you in it." Pausing for a moment, she pulled a piece of paper out of her pocket and held it up so he could see it. "I made a new list." Tony could see it and almost let a few tears fall himself because there was only one thing on the list, and he could read it. "Number one. Tell Tony." Stepping forward, Ziva came to a stop with a few inches between them. She looked into his eyes. "At the airport I told you that you were loved." Tony smiled at the memory.
Tony. You are so…
Handsome? Funny? What?
Loved.
"My feelings have not changed since that day. I want to show you that, if you'll give me the chance."
Momentarily setting the necklace on the counter, Tony drew Ziva into his arms in a tight embrace. He rested his cheek on her head taking in the moment. The feel of her arms around his neck. The feel of her hair on his cheek. The way it felt so right to be holding her in this way. Pulling back but still keeping his arms around her he answered. "I want forever with you, Ziva. I'm not asking you to marry me right now, but someday. I love you." Before she could respond he kissed her gently, only pulling back when he desperately needed air.
Looking up at him shyly, Ziva spoke quietly. "I love you, Tony." She kissed him quickly.
"Now," Tony spoke a little louder, feeling like the weight of the world was lifted off his shoulders. "Maybe it's just me, but I think it would look just a little suspicious if we came in here to shower together and then came out the same way we went in. I'm going to take a shower. Care to join me?"
Ziva pretended to think about it for a minute before shrugging. "If you insist."
Tony scooped her up bridal style and twirled her around, smiling at the girlish giggle that escaped from her lips. Setting her back down, he smirked, not able to prevent the reference about to escape his lips. "Ziva, I do believe this is the beginning of a beautiful relationship."
A/N: Aaaaaand end! That was longer than I was expecting, and I didn't expect to go from Ziva's POV, there you have it…and, I got it up on time! It's still an hour plus before Tuesday morning where I am. If anyone feels weird about the fact that they say "I love you" when this is supposed to be more realistic, they do pretty much say it in PPF – at least Ziva does – which is why I felt okay adding it here. Everyone probably won't like it, but seeing as it has been as good as said, it felt right enough to include. Thoughts? Comments? Questions? I haven't written much angst so I know it's nowhere near perfect, but is it ok? Until next time,
~tivafanintheusa
