The Hours Unmake
Author's Note: Uhhh…hi? Yeah, I'm just writing this short little fic, because I need something to put me in a writing mood. Enjoy! (P.S: SOTE Chapter Six is being written, albeit very slowly.)
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Bleach. End of story.
WARNINGS: Uhhh…angst? Deep thought? Sort of Kaien/Rukia, implied Ichigo/Rukia.
The Hours Unmake:
'I ran away…because I was afraid to fight you.'
'I only came back…because I couldn't stand my cowardice.'
'I only used my blade…because I couldn't bear to see you suffer.'
'I did it all for…myself. I'm pathetic…so pathetic. I'm not worth saving…I'm not worth shedding blood over.'
These are the words that repeat in my head now, as they did so long ago, in that time when I waited for death.
These are the words that repeat in my head now, as they did so long ago, when the rain fell and the earth ran red.
These are the words I know now to be true, as I lay here dying, at last.
The rain falls much as it did then, and as I lay here gazing upward at the one I love, knowing every breath might
(will, the voices whisper)
be my last, I know these words to be true with every fiber of my being. How can they not, when even as I lay here dying, even as tears fall from my love's face, even as my life's blood stains the earth, all I can see is the face of him, that one from so very long ago?
Even as those I love fight to keep me with them, I know it is futile. I am fading, and I welcome peace
(what peace, the voices whisper)
with all my heart.
I know now that I was never meant to love. For in the end, those I love suffer, always. In the end, my heart is rent in two, always.
It's true. I'm not worth saving. Maybe, should I be given another chance, I will find love, and be loved.
Perhaps, only through ending, will I find my beginning.
But these are but foolish dreams--this I know. I am ever cursed to suffer, ever cursed to be selfish, ever cursed to be
(pathetic, the voices whisper)
nothing. Eventually, this time will end, and I will wander, a soul alone, as I was meant to be.
All these words I know to be true, for as my heart beats it last, and darkness closes in, my last
(traitorous, the voices whisper,)
words slips forth, a breath of wind in the silent rain.
"Kaien…sir…"
----
the hours unmake
our flesh, our bone.
the soul is all;
and all alone.
----
Author's Note: I honestly have no idea was the crap I just wrote. But…in this, basically, Rukia is dying, and Ichigo is next to her (hence the implied), but all she can see when she looks at him is Kaien. Hence her final (traitorous, the voices whisper) words.
She's basically thinking on how everyone she loves is torn from her in some way--how she is not meant to love, and how she thinks she's pathetic.
Not that any of this is true, of course. Rukia is awesome.
Please leave me your thoughts!
Hopefully I'm in a writing mood, now…
