So this my first Vampire Diaries fic! Be patient with me. :P
A/N: I do not own the characters. (Except Jason.) They belong to L.J. Smith, Kevin Williamson and Julie Plec. I just get to play with them for now.
Characters: Bonnie/OC, Bonnie/Damon, slight Damon/Elena, Stefan/Elena, Caroline/Tyler.
Summary: Set the future: I didn't think that after all this time I would be in this relationship. That I was friends with HIM. That he still after all this time still had feelings for Elena and I was begging to lose sense of who I was and my purpose in this life. It had to come to end right?
Warning: There is mentions of physical abuse.
Music that inspired this chapter: City and Colour: Hope For Now and Weightless, Emily Haines and the Soft Skeleton: Crowd Surf off a Cliff.
"I don't get it. I mean why is it that every time she asks you to do something you hop up like her frickin lap dog!"
She had thrown her car keys on the side table as he was stumbling toward his bed. As she was yelling at him she had forgotten that they had under the most unexpected and bizarre circumstances formed a friendship. It wasn't conventional by any means but it was them. With him she didn't have to worry about what she said or what she wore. She didn't have the expectations laid upon her that she had with the rest of them. In particular with the one she chosen to be in a relationship with; appearances meant everything to him now.
That's why she was dressed up in this fancy black gown and had six inch stilettos on. Business dinners trumped anniversary dates. So did the regular trip to the bathroom to top off the last fix he had "to calm my nerves" he would say. The flimsy jacket she had on wasn't doing anything to shield the chill she felt from the rain that had ragged on her as she tried to haul her friend up his staircase that lead to his room. She was pissed that she had to practically carry him home after he had almost embarrassed himself at this dinner party. She really didn't have the time to deal with this.
"What is it with you? Why can't you just accept the fact that she is never going to love you! Not the way that you deserve. I can't stand here and watch as you throw everything away. And for what? An unattainable dream that one day she will look at you the way she looks at him? Caress your face the way she does him? Kiss you the way she does him? Touch you? It's NEVER going to happen and the sooner you realize that the better. Because I can't-"
She had her left hand resting on her hip and her right palm flat against her forehead. She didn't get! After all this time, why was it was that he was still harboring feelings for this women. It is almost as if he had lost utter respect for himself. It hurt her to watch her dismiss him the way she had tonight. To watch her throw the relationship she had with the other one, in front of him was cruel. She even had the audacity to ask him to get them drinks!
From that moment on she knew that she was going to be cleaning up her mess tonight.
The feelings she had for him were platonic right? She had the one she believed she wanted on her arm tonight and she couldn't help but feel like she was in the wrong spot. She still had this feeling that she made a mistake. She never should have told him that it was a mistake and that they could still be friends.
Now she was yelling at him and saying all the things she felt about her own relationship and she didn't know if it was going to ever change.
The right side of her jaw was still tender from two nights before and the bruise was a bitch to cover tonight.
"Hey honey. How was work today?" she walked over to him and helped him out of his jacket and hung it up on the coat hanger for him.
"It was fine." He said as loosened his tie. "How was your day?"
"Oh it was good. Did a bit of grocery shopping and dropped off the dry cleaning. Had a bite with the girls. You know the usual."
"Oh and how are Elena and Caroline?"
"Good. Good. Elena and Stefan are going to be at that business dinner of yours on Friday. Caroline is bringing Tyler with her. I hope that is going to be alright."
He smiled up at her then. "Of course baby, I mean Stefan works there to honey, so does Caroline."
He hugged her and as he inhaled her scent he could smell his cologne on her. He placed his hands roughly onto her arms and pushed backward so that he could look her in the face.
She was confused; she thought that they were getting better. She was obviously wrong. His face had drastically changed from loving and calm to murderous and spiteful.
"So lunch with the girls huh? Then why is it that I can smell another MAN on you? And let's not get it twisted baby we both know who I am talking about. I thought we had already discussed this." His hands squeezed tighter.
"It's not what you think." she pulled her arms from his grasp and walked into the kitchen.
"We ran into each other during lunch it was nothing! And he has nothing to do with this baby. Let's not forget we didn't discuss anything. You seem to think that you can pick and choose my friends now. You can't. He and I have been friends for as long as you and I have been together. You didn't seem to have an issue with it then. So why now?"
"Look I am not stupid ok! Are you sleeping with him?"
"God no! How could you even think that? I would never do that to you Jason!"
"Really; because we both know that you have a history with that sort of thing!"
"That was before I met you! How dare you…" She was hurt by the assumption he was placing on her. How could he think so low of her?
He rushed at her then.
"Don't try and deny it. I can smell him on you. It's all the proof I need. You may not be sleeping with him now. But you and I both know you would be if it wasn't for the fact that you are with me and that he's in love with Elena."
She was eerily calm at that moment.
"You know what Jason you are absolutely right. I would be sleeping him and I am sure that he wouldn't treat me the way that you do! He wouldn't sleep with his frickin assistant behind my back and expect me to be ok with it either. But hey what can I expect from such a small man?"
And just as the words left my mouth she really didn't care that he would raise his hand to her again and she really didn't care that it was going to hurt because at that point, all the hurt she was going to feel afterward was not even a fraction of the turmoil that was raging inside of her.
Just as she though. An open palm came down to the right side of her face. It sent her fumbling against the kitchen counter. He took a step toward her and took hold of her arm. He tugged her in close so that he could whisper into her ear.
"Bonnie you know that I really hate to do this to you. So why do you persist on making me angry? We both know how it's going to turn out. I am man honey. Which means I am stronger then you. Don't forget that. As for Dana, well a man has different needs then a women baby and she fulfills those needs. Don't get me wrong you and I still have an amazing sex life but…hey being the small man that I am someone has to take care of them right? She had her eyes transfixed on a spot on the wall ahead of her.
"I still want you Bonnie and I refuse to live without you. I am a man that gets what he wants. Don't ever forget it." He had a firm grip on her arm then, and as she had her eyes saw his hand raised in the corner of her eye, she moved her face away from his hand as he tried to move her bangs from her face.
"Don't forget that we have my business dinner to attend this week. You better not embarrass me Bonnie. I know that he's going to be there. I just want you to know that if this night is ruined in any way we are going to have a problem. But I know that you are going to be on your best behavior right darling?"
It still amazed her that he could still have the sweetest voice yet have it harbor such coldness and malicious in it at the same time.
"Yes." She said quietly. He let go of her arm then
"That a girl. See when we play by my rules everything is better isn't it?" He smiled then and walked toward the fridge and grabbed a beer. He proceeded to the living room to watch the business channel.
She let out a sigh then and couldn't help to think that this could not be her life. This couldn't be what she had given up magic for. This couldn't be what she had let him go for.
He was sitting on his bed minus his suit jacket and tie. He was trying to remove his shoes now. As he fumbled with them uselessly she walked toward him then and kneeled down and pushed his hands away to help him.
"Cant' what?" He asked, looking down at her hands as they moved as delicately as she walked.
"Do this with you anymore. Yes I am and always will be your friend. But not like this. I can't stand to see you self-destruct anymore. It's really disgusting to watch. You don't even-." As her tone had dropped to no more than a whisper, she couldn't help but feel frustrated.
"You know what? I think that we have had enough for tonight." With that she rose, as did he.
"I didn't ask you to come here and lecture me on how to live my life! You sure seem to have all the answers for someone who throws herself at a guy who- Let's face it -is a few sniffs away from his rightful place six feet under. Have you looked in the mirror lately honey? Because the makeups wearing off, and his handy work is begging to show."
She looked at the ground then and raised an eyebrow to that. She knew there were only so many times she could tell him that she ran into the door. Or she had fallen into to the kitchen counter.
"Hmm... well I guess we have each other figured out huh? You know what's really tragic about this whole thing is that I never thought that this would be US! After all this time we are still here. Nothing's changed. Yes he and I have a complicated relationship. But at least I have one! You don't!' It's not real Damon. Elena is with Stefan. You have to let it go. With that she walked to the side table to retrieve her car keys. She looked over her shoulder as her hand reach for the door knob.
"Make sure you lock the door when I leave."
With that she opened the door and left. Back to her cold apartment. Jason was probably going to be with Dana. She wouldn't have expected anything less right now anyways. He was probably getting high and fucking her right now. On their anniversary night too. When had she become so small? So insignificant? There had to be more then night spent alone in their apartment. Sitting up at night thinking about her what her life had become over one to many glasses of wine.
A restless night in a cold bed was not what she was looking forward to tonight. As she reached her car she looked back up too see that Damon still had his light on. She had to wonder then when they had become this. She put the key in the ignition and sped off into the direction of the nearest liquor store. She was going to need it to celebrate her 2 year anniversary alone.
Hope you liked the first chapter. It's a bit darker then I had originally planned but hey these things happen right?
Feel free to hit that Review button! Tell me what you think. Criticism is always welcome! Any suggestions? Should I keep going? Let me know!3
Love Alisha (love14) ;)
Until next time.
