For Emma, All Those Years Ago
Chapter One
October 1987
"Night, Momma." Robbie and Emma sat up in their beds while their mother, Karen, plugged in their nightlight.
For fraternal twins, they looked quite a lot alike. Both three year olds possessed a wide smile; and the only difference in their eyes was the color- Emma had bright blue and Robbie's were a green. Curls grew from the tops of both their heads, Robbie's sandy and Emma's an icy blonde.
But then again, all little children sort of look alike in one way or another.
Karen pressed a kiss to each of her kid's foreheads and pulled their covers up to their shoulders. The fact that there was only a nightstand between them did make her life a bit easier. "I love you, sleep tight." She wished them and turned out the lights, looking back and leaving only a small crack in the door. The moment that the lights flicked off, Robbie's little hand flung out between the beds for his sister to grab. Emma took it gently and gave Rob a knowing smile; "Look at the nightlight." she encouraged, Robbie nodded but kept his eyes wide open and staring at his sister. "Ain't no such thing as monsters." She assured, giving him another wide smile. Robbie attempted to return it, but Emma saw right through him. "Nuthin' can happen when I'm here." Em promised like she did every night, even though when it came down to it, even she knew that a three year old girl would never stand much of a chance against anything but another three year old… as long as the kid wasn't a lot bigger than her. That didn't matter though, as long as Robbie felt like his sister was invincible.
As the twins went through their nightly routine, Karen made her way down the hall and into the room she shared with her husband.
Bobby sat on the bed in a set of worn in flannel pajamas and a robe haphazardly tied over it. Back in these days, his beard was only a slight stubble and a pair of reading glasses rested just on the bridge of his nose while he read A Wrinkle in Time to decide if it was suitable for his kids. Overall, he liked being a dad. He wasn't the overly- involved type, but he… liked it. He'd never wanted kids, but now that he had em'? Well, he supposed it wasn't so bad. The only real problem being that he was so terrified of screwing up those two perfect kids lives just by being around that he wasn't always all there.
But then he would think of Karen, and how amazing she was and he knew that with her around- nothing could ever be wrong. That woman would never, ever let it.
"You think they'll actually sleep tonight?" Bob asked Karen when he looked up to watch her take off her dressing gown, revealing a light blue night dress. Both of them were well aware of the kids tendency to wait for all the lights to be off before Emma would get up and turn on the bedroom light and she and Robbie would draw and play in other worlds of their own and laugh, then pass out on the floor around 1 o'clock. Then they would sleep until 10 and the cycle would repeat. Pre-school was going to be a rude awakening.
Karen nearly laughed at the question while she walked over to the bed and moved the covers. "No." She answered with a smile and kissed her husband. Normally she would have laid down, but tonight she wanted to talk. "Hey, Bob." She put a gentle hand on his shoulder and he looked up. "There is something that I've been meaning to talk to you about."
Bobby marked his book and looked up at her with intrigue and nervousness, "What is it, baby?" he inquired. Karen gave him a small smile and looked down for a second. "I think…" she started and then looked up at him again with her smile growing wider. "I think I want to try for another baby."
Bobby's breath caught immediately, and thought about his answer long and hard- but he didn't want to lie to her, he couldn't lie to her. "Kare, I love you- but don't you think Rob and Em are more than enough?" Karen moved her hand from his shoulder and looked him over, she hadn't expected that response. "Oh, come on. Please don't give me that look."
"You know I want a big family, Bob." She started. "I hated being an basically an only child an-"
"We have two kids, Kare. They're not lonely. We got a boy and a girl in one go, pretty perfect if you ask me darlin'" He reminded her, she bit the inside of her cheek to hold her tongue. Bobby groaned, knowing her every little tick. "Karen."
"What?" Her eyes met his again and Bobby seemed to lose a bit of his backbone to her.
"Nothing." Was all he could manage, he didn't want to fight- they hadn't fought in so long.
"No Bob. What?" Karen pressured,
Bobby sighed heavily, knowing no matter what- he was going to lose this one. "We didn't even try for Rob and Em, why would we want another?" A look of regret immediately washed over Bob's entire body, his face, his mannerisms. It was one of those rare instances where an emotion was felt just so deeply that there is no way to hide it. The regret spread through him like a lightening strike would have sent electricity coursing in his body.
Karen was brought to the verge of tears. "Did you just say… you don't want our children?" He cringed. Even knowing that was what she was going to make of his words, hearing it said out loud didn't sit right in his stomach. In fact, it made him feel a little sick. Of course he loved his children.
"No, that's not what I-"
"Tell the truth, Bobby Steven." Now standing with her arms crossed over her chest, Karen couldn't quite comprehend what was happening yet. The fact they were fighting hadn't entirely registered.
"I didn't want them at first, you know that already, but it's different now, Kare." Bobby explained, calming her down for only a moment.
"So, why not have another"
Bobby sighed heavily just before his own mother's words came rushing into his head in that cold and suppressed memory. His momma's voice, even disembodied, was clear as day. He repeated them: "Because I screw up everything I touch! It's only a matter of time!"
"You screw up everything you touch what does that even mean." Her face contorted as tears fought their way to the surface.
In that same memory, he heard the bang of a shotgun and he shut his eyes to push it away. "It means exactly what it sounds like, what have I ever done right" Bobby ran through a long list in his head and came up blank.
Karen again took his words to mean something else, she didn't know anything about his childhood. In fact, she was starting to believe she didn't know this man that she loved so very much at all. "You did not just ask me that." She seethed, her body tensing. "Your kids, Bob, your fucking kids!" She near shouted, trying not to let Emma hear. Robbie she knew would stay in the room, but Emma would follow her mother's distressed voice without a second thought. "I can't even believe you right now, I-"
Bobby shook his head, and picked up a pillow, a throw blanket, and A Wrinkle in Time before he announced. "I'll take the couch tonight" and walked past her.
Karen turned to look at his retreating frame and near whispered; "You broke my heart, Bobby Singer."
"Dad," Emma shook Bobby as best she could. Karen was helping Robbie into his Master Yoda costume, watching Bob and Emma out of the corner of her eye. It had been two days since their fight. They had hardly said more than two words to each other since. Bobby stirred- it only encouraged Emma, "Daddy, get up" Em whined and pushed him again. Bob rubbed his eyes and his vision focused onto the little girl in the blue dress. "Napping is for babies." Emma crossed her arms over her chest, Bobby looked at his watch- 5:50pm.
Bobby chuckled at Emma's comment and went to ruffle her hair, but she held up her hand and stepped back. "What?" Bob asked his daughter, not understanding until Emma pointed to the bun on top of her head. She didn't want him to mess up her hair. Bob smiled, knowing that he'd be in trouble with this kid when she got older. "Sorry, pumpkin." he apologized.
"It's okay!" Emma beamed and ran over to Robbie in her Cinderella costume.
Bob's eyes were focused on Karen though, he was afraid to apologize to her, she had every right to be angry with him- he knew that. But balls. Not talking for two days wasn't supposed to hurt this much, was it? "Momma, when Uncle Trevor and Aunt Linda comin'?" Rob asked with that little twang he and his sister picked from their dad, he was playing with his mini light saber. Emma put her tiara on top of her bun and picked up a foam sword, she wanted to be a princess, but she'd also wanted to be a knight.
"Soon, bud." Karen announced after looking down at her thin black watch. Robbie opened his lightsaber and poked his sister with it. Emma smirked, took her sword and went to jab him in the stomach. The attempt was easily blocked and quickly retaliated. "I'm gonna kick your ass." Emma threatened, Bob just shook his head. Emma swore constantly, Karen and Bobby had lectured her, put her in time out, taken things away and nothing changes. At this point all they could really do was hope she grew out of it. "No, I'll win!" Robbie exclaimed swiping at his sister's side.
Emma laughed, "I'm bigger!" This was true, the kid was tall. Emma lunged forward, and with a hysterical laugh, Rob took off with his sister trailing just behind him. Tires on loose gravel rolled up outside and Karen's sister Linda and her husband Trevor came inside without so much as a knock, Robbie came barreling past, and Trevor caught the terror charging behind him. "Uncle Trev!" She shrieked and giggled, wrapping little arms around his neck. "Where are they?" She looked behind him for her 3 cousins, John, Ronald and Allen.
"They're with my Mom, we're gonna go see them now, Robbie you coming big man?" Trevor asked opening the front door for them to leave.
"Bye Mom, bye Dad!" He shouted running outside and to the car. Emma didn't bother with a goodbye, just got carried down to her car seat.
"Thanks for taking the kids, Lin." Bobby thanked his sister in law back inside. Karen popped her head around the corner and smiled at her sister.
"Seriously Lin, I can't thank you enough." Karen smiled. "Just bring them back if they're too much okay? I know you have your hands full with the boys."
"Wouldn't dream of it." Lin smiled, and with that Karen went back to the kitchen.
Karen talked to her sister everyday. On the phone if not in person, and she knew about what had been going on in the house. She wasn't particularly happy with Bobby to say the least. "You treat her good, Singer. Ya hear?" She looked him over and he nodded, smiling. He already had a plan to make it up to her. He was hiding flowers in his study and he was about to go make himself look all sharp and shit. Play some nice music, dance with her. Tell her they could try if that's what she really, truly wanted. He wanted to be better than what his mother said, and he couldn't let her words and that night ruin his marriage to the love of his life. With that, Linda left and Bobby closed the door behind her.
In few moments that Karen had been in the kitchen, a black smoke flew in through the open window behind her. While she hummed and cut carrots, the smoke creeped quietly into her mouth, spreading through every inch of her body, invading her, possessing her. Until she was trapped in the far corners of her mind as if she was locked in a cage with no control. Panicked, she tried to scream, she tried to move her own arms, her legs- even blinking became a task too heavy for her to undertake. Her body continued on like it had been before the smoke overtook her, humming and cutting carrots.
Bobby entered the kitchen and leaned against the doorframe, smiling. He just watched her, lost in his thoughts. Living in fear was never going to prevent him from making mistakes. Though he hadn't lived up to it yet, this family was all he ever wanted and needed. The kids, Karen. He was ready to start proving it, working for it. He was ready to kiss his beautiful, generous, loving, kind wife again. To make the sacrifices for her that she had for him. He couldn't pinpoint the moment the switch had flipped, but it had. "Hey, baby, I really need to talk to ya." His tone was lilting, Karen continued to cut carrots. What he couldn't see was the gaze that followed the SUV his kids were in, if he had, he would have been terrified.
"So talk." The demon possessing Karen used the stolen voice to respond, curious to what Bob singer was thinking. After all- it had all the time in the world.
"Well, I'd like to start by saying I'm sorry." Bobby moved slowly to Karen, "And that we got two damn good kids." He wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his hands over her stomach and his chin on the top of her head. "If you want this, if you want another baby, we can do it. We're in a good place financially. It's feasible." When she didn't respond, he took in a shaky breath and kissed her head, taking in the scent of strawberries in her hair. "And I am-" He paused, looking for the right words and coming up short. "I'm sorry Kare, for how I reacted. I'm gonna fix it." He kissed her cheek. "Say something, Kare."
He needed to hear her voice, needed to move past this and make amends to their marriage. Karen turned around and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Bobby, Bobby, Bobby." Karen said a little on the lower side- maybe even... seductively? It was out of character for her, and Bob picked up on it immediately. "You can't make it 'all alright'." Bobby's brow furrowed, he'd thought for sure she would be open to him. Karen moved her hands down his arms and smiled.
The demon had been watching this family for months, after all, it had been sent here for a reason. "You break everything you touch." It was then Karen's eyes went completely black. Bobby, startled, pushed away from her and stumbled into the kitchen table. The demon switched its eyes back to Karen. "What's wrong, darling?" She asked, innocent, like nothing had happened. She tried to convince him he was going a little crazy, manipulation made it happy.
Bobby pointed to her, baffled, hurt by her words. The demon had known what would cut him deeply, and Bobby knew Karen would never say that to him. Not after his mother. "Wh- what was that?!" He exclaimed.
"Oh, Mr. Singer, you silly little drunken fool." Karen grabbed the knife from the counter. Karen's eyes became black again, already bored with the old man, he wasn't her target. "She never loved you, Bobby. Look at you." The Demon pointed the knife at Bobby, then gestured her arms outward. "I mean look at her. How could this, want you?"
"I can go in by myself, Auntie Lin." Little Emma crossed her little arms and sassed aunt. She wanted to be a big girl, and being able to walk inside her own house by herself was a step towards that in her mind. Lin couldn't believe she let the kid talk her into driving all the way home because she forgot to say goodbye to her Momma. Linda weighed her options but eventually succumbed to Emma's childish charms. "Fine, go let yourself in." Linda rolled her eyes and the three year old jumped out. Lin wasn't going to leave until she saw the child was inside and the door was closed. When it was, she drove off. Without any second thoughts. That's the most stubborn kid in the world, she swore.
Behind that closed door was a literal living hell. "Momma, Daddy! I'm back!" Emma shouted and began to look for her parents, a bounce in her step as she moved. When Bobby heard her voice outside the locked door his heart rate quickened and he felt sick to his stomach. That thing out there was going to have access to his daughter. He couldn't bring himself to hurt it, it was still his wife, it was still Karen. He'd locked himself in this closet and cried for a long while now.
"Hi Momma! Guess what happen- Mommy? What's wrong with your eyes? What's on your dress?" Bobby heard his daughter question, which meant the demon had found Emma. He cried, holding his head in his hand, his chest heaving. He didn't know what he was supposed to do. He wanted to know though. Why couldn't someone just tell him what needed to be done? "Mommy, what- what's in your hand?" Bobby heard the fear in the little girl's voice and unlocked the door. But still didn't open it. He felt like such a damned coward. "Mommy? Mom!" Then Emma started to scream and Bobby busted through the door, tackling Karen to the ground. He heard something slice, and Karen's possessed face looked smug. Emma let out a blood curdling scream and sat in a ball in the corner covering her ears, but unable to take her eyes away. Her mom landed on her knife, blood pooled around her stomach.
The three year old was petrified, how could that have happened? What was wrong with her mom?
"It'll take a whole lot more than that." Karen whispered in Bobby's ear. If it had only been one wound, she could have lived. But then, Bobby didn't know that, he just knew he had to protect Emma, it was what Karen- the real Karen- would have wanted. With hot tears still running down his face and a heavy heart, he reluctantly stabbed the knife through his wife's heart. Emma screamed even louder. "Look at what you've done." Karen whispered, completely unaffected by her wounds.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." Bobby kept repeating. He dropped the weapon and held his head. A door kicked in downstairs and he crawled to his daughter and cradled her, trying to protect her from the horrors that had befallen the family. What more could Bobby do? A man ran up the stairs shouting in Latin with a rosary in hand. Karen's mouth opened long before the exorcism was complete and the cloud of black smoke violently dashed out from her mouth and out of the house. Emma was shaking, terrified. She didn't understand, and honestly, Bobby didn't either.
Karen's breaths were heavy and her hands fell weakly to the ground. Bobby moved to her, a trembling little girl still in his arms. He held Karen's hand, and weakly Karen's final words left her mouth. "I forgive you."
Karen tried to smile but it was bloody, not at all comforting like she had intended. Emma kept repeating the words "Make the monster go away, make the monster go away." Then Karen went limp and soon, she would become cold.
Emma looked up into her dad's eyes, she couldn't breath. "Momma?" she whispered, her eyes went to her mother, and she reverted, crawling to her. "Mommy?" Emma whispered in her ear. Nothing, her eyes were open, but there was nothing there. Bobby was paralyzed. "Momma?" It was even weaker yet, and she looked back at her Dad, a tiny hand holding her mother's, waiting for it to squeeze back. It never came, she got to her feet and kicked her momma.
"Get up!" She screeched, again her mother didn't move. "I said get UP!" She kicked her again with all her might. "Why won't you get up!" She yelled, and then began to scream, even after the man who'd expelled the smoke tried to take her away from the scene, she screamed until she was blue in the face and kept getting out of his arms and running back, kicking and punching her mother. The longer it unfolded in front of her the more Bobby lost it, he was crying so hard he couldn't breath anymore or sit up, his whole body shook. Emma's Cinderella gown was covered in blood and so was her face and her hair, he watched as Emma threw herself on top of the body and sobbed and she screamed at the man to just leave her alone. It was the worst nightmare he could possibly imagine.
After the man's fifth attempt to drag her away, he went to Bobby.
"Sir, I need you to get it together."
And that's when Bobby knew. This, right now, this was the beginning of the end.
Karen Elizabeth Watson-Singer
Beloved mother, wife, sister, daughter
and friend.
September 16th, 1954- October 31st, 1987
Physically speaking, the little girl in the plain black dress and the white hair was there. She was holding her father's hand in silence while all of the adults and her brother cried, yet Emma was stoic and silent. She wanted to leave, she didn't want to spend time in this cemetery, she didn't want to wear black, she didn't want people to keep saying they were sorry- all Emma wanted was her momma to wake up and sing her "You are my Sunshine". Bobby squeezed his kids hand and looked down at her with blurry vision, but Emma didn't return the gesture or look up.
It made sense. Not speaking after what she had seen and heard, but it had been a week now… "It's okay, bud" Bobby comforted the sobbing boy in his arms, Robb was handling Karen being gone the opposite of his sister. He clung to Bob, he spoke too much, he cried and woke up screaming for Karen, he didn't understand. The concept of death couldn't work itself around his young mind, it didn't make sense.
Emma let her hand fall from her father's and she began to walk away with her head looking at her feet, her father's eyes followed her- as did the eyes of every other attendee. Emma walked to the walkway and towards the gates of the grave yard. "I- I'm sorry." Bobby apologized and went after her with Rob still in his arms. Lin and her husband watched Bob as he caught up with her, knelt down to her level, and held out his hand again.
She didn't take it. Didn't even look at it. Rob pushed off his dad a little bit, indicating he wanted to be put down, Bobby did so. Robbie went up and hugged his sister, she was unresponsive. Rufus rolled up in a stolen car, waiting for the family. "We got to go kids." He said, and they all walked to the man that saved their lives. "We got a long road ahead of us."
