"You were my Shannon…" – Diane Sterling

As the upstairs door quietly closed, followed by footsteps receding along the porch before disappearing into the yard beyond, Tony finally drifted back to the workbench from where he had secreted himself when Diane arrived. He held his cup loosely, finding mysteries in its depths as Gibbs contemplated his grandfather's watch. Not even Tony's insatiable curiosity could override the oppressive awkwardness of Diane's admission which hung in the air between them well after she left.

Resting the glass out of the way on the bench, Tony broke the silence. "I guess I should head out…"

Gibbs shook his head. "Pizza should be here any time." His eyes met Tony's briefly, a request hanging in the air. Thumbing the delicate etching on its case, he glanced down at the watch. Taking a deep breath, he explained, "This is the one thing she took that really mattered to me."

"It's beautiful," Tony readily agreed. Using the workbench as a buffer, he gauged Gibbs' mood.

The older man stood pensive before him. Lost in his own thoughts.

Fumbling for something to say, Tony broke the silence, "It looks old."

"Yeah. Family heirloom. It was my Grandfather's. My dad gave it to me when Shan and I got married." Gibbs smiled fondly as he remembered Shannon threatening to cut off her hair so she could get him a matching chain to go with it for Christmas their first year.

While Gibbs stood there reminiscing, Tony nodded respectfully as he quietly edged along the workbench, intending to give him some privacy. When the doorbell rang a moment later, Tony sprang for the stairs. "I'll get it."

Jethro stood in place, damning himself for reacting the way he had. For not moving on as soon as Diane had left. Later that night, he damned himself again for plying Tony with one too many beers for an excuse to get him to stay, and then dragging him to his bed rather than allowing him to take the couch like Tony had suggested, much to his dismay. He then damned himself for the way Tony was so formal – cautious – with him, even going so far as to respect the invisible line between them rather than engaging him in their usual playfulness which invariably led to lovemaking.

Taking the opportunity to spoon up behind his slumbering partner, Gibbs knew deep in his heart that he loved so much about Tony. The way he would call at random times just to check in with inane questions and ridiculous excuses just to speak with him. How he would send him a quick text when a movie he liked was on TV. How he would drop by with something for Gibbs' sweet tooth, and then just hang out while Jethro worked on the boat, often staying the night to the point that his apartment seemed like so much of an afterthought. And yet as much as Gibbs enjoyed their deepening relationship which was unlike anything he had had in over twenty years, he kept driving him off, pushing him back, and refusing to make the next move no matter what his gut told him.

Struggling to set those doubts aside, he burrowed into the warm body and breathed deeply, enjoying the clean, sandalwood scent of Tony's shampoo, which smelled like home and safety and love. And, he dreamed…

Gibbs' eyes slowly drifted open as he awoke, revealing the diffused glow of the early morning sun as it winnowed its way through the ice and snow encrusted window. With a sigh, he burrowed into the warmth at his side, slipping one arm around the delicate waist and drawing her closer. Shannon sleepily turned her head in question.

"Morning," he whispered, gracing her forehead with a chaste kiss before settling down tight beside her. Jethro buried his nose in her hair, reveling in being surrounded by her scent, her feel, her presence.

"Good morning," she smiled back at him. Her eyes danced fondly, as she stroked his hair away from his face. "Gibbs, why won't you let me go?"

"Go where?" he asked lightly, wondering what she had planned for the day. He contentedly snuggled into her, holding her tight, until stubble scratching across his cheek awoke him with a start.

His eyes snapped open to find Tony watching him, his brow furrowed in concern before patient understanding fell like a veil across his eyes. Gibbs looked away from the sorrow he saw reflected back at him. This happened every time he dreamt of Shannon and now, with the tone of the dreams changing, he couldn't immediately handle his lover's patience. With a muttered excuse, he sprang from the bed and made his escape to the bathroom.

Once there, he turned the shower as hot as he could get it and jumped in to pay his penance with scalding heat as he battled to pull himself together. Returning to his bedroom, he found Tony already dressed, with an uncertainty he hadn't seen since the early days of whatever they wanted to call their relationship. They went through their entire morning routine without a word, followed by a stop at Gibbs' favorite coffee shop, and then on to what promised to be a boring day at the Navy Yard.

With the dreams weighing heavy on his mind, Gibbs was short tempered with his team much of the morning, with Tony bearing the brunt of it. The more Tony ran interference for the rest of the team, the greater Gibbs frustration and anger grew.

When Tony was called up to one of the conference rooms halfway through the day, Gibbs hadn't thought twice about it. If he were honest with himself, it was a relief to not have to deal with Tony's willingness to take his admittedly unreasonable bastardity for a little while. As it was, he was halfway out of the bullpen to run down to check in with Ducky on a few details about a cold case they had inherited from one of the other teams as an excuse to escape his mood for a while. Little did he anticipate the Op his second had been recruited for, or what that would mean to him personally.

When he returned to the bullpen an hour later, Tony was gone…