Hi! Another one of my I-Don't-Think-It-Gets-Enough-Popularity rants.

Disclaimer: I do not own the 10th Kingdom

Bath Time

"Wolf, you've got to take a bath… the air around you is rank!" Virginia scowled after kissing him. The wolfie drew his head back and stared innocently at her.

"But why? Don't you like the air around me?" Virginia couldn't help but laugh at her oh-so-innocent (acting) husband.

"Oh yes, I like to make out with you in a toxic gas cloud!" She continued to laugh. Wolf growled playfully and stood up.

"Huff puff! Fine, I'll go take a bath!" he sniffed and walked indignantly out of the room, his tail held high. It took all of Virginia's will power not to laugh at her husband's attempts at being stuck-up. A door slammed shut, and a couple of seconds later, Wolf came jaunting back through the living room. He had a towel over one of his shoulders, a bar of soap and scrub brush in one of his hands. He whistled and walked to the door.

"Honey… you look like Ernie." Virginia knew she was just going to regret asking her next question. "Where are you going?" Wolf stopped and gave an elegant bow.

"Why, I'm going to take a bath like you said!"

"Where?" Wolf looked at her like she was dumb.

"Where does anyone take a bath?" He left the question hanging for Virginia to answer.

"In the bathroom…" Virginia said. Wolf scoffed.

"The bathroom? Why would anyone take a bath in a bathroom?" Virginia raised an eyebrow. "I'm going to take a bath in the lake!"

"What lake?" Virginia stood and walked up to her husband.

"The big one with the green lady taking a bath in it!" Virginia sighed and laughed at the same time.

"That 'green lady' is a national symbol!" She laughed. Wolf cocked his head to the side in confusion.

"Your national symbol is a lady taking a bath?"

"No! That's the Lady of Liberty!" Wolf nodded, and then stopped.

"Well, I'm off to take a bath!" he announced, once again putting his hand on the doorknob.

"No!" Virginia placed a hand over his and smiled at him. Wolf leaned over and kissed her on the nose.

"Oh, would you make up your mind? Do you want me to take a bath or not?"

With a sigh, Virginia answered, "of COURSE I want you to shower, but do it in there!" she pointed to the bathroom down the hall. Wolf sighed and leaned seductively against the door, causing Virginia's heart to sputter.

"Then I still need to go out and get water! You don't expect it to just pour 'magically' out faucet, do you?" he made jazz-fingers on the word magic. Virginia caught her laughter before it exploded, honestly not even wanting to answer that. She merely took his hand and led him to the bathroom, showing him everything about how to use the bathtub and enjoying his child-like joy.

"There, now take your bath!" Virginia laughed, closing the door behind her. She sat down on the couch and relaxed… for about a minute.

"Virginia!!!!" the wife jumped up and ran to the bathroom, sliding on the hardwood floors and slamming the door open.

"What?" There were bubbles… everywhere. It looked like the Great Bubble War.

"What ARE these?" Wolf snapped at a random floating iridescent bubble. Virginia leaned against the frame and sighed.

"Maybe… you should stick to showers."

"Who's having a baby?"


Yeah... we all know he's slightly out of it... but his hotness makes up for it! Please review!