A/N: From the fox_las livejournal community prompt: A character reads a book about him/herself. Must be under 1000 words (I'm not kidding mine was *exactly* 1000 words…after I went through and found a few throw away words here and there that I could remove…*facepalm*). Quite possibly the fluffiest thing I've ever written. Hope you enjoy!
A Tale of Two Siblings
It was the best of rhymes; it was the worst of rhymes…
Finn was certain the phrase seemed somehow familiar, though he couldn't for the life of him figure out where he'd seen it before. He read the rest of the dedication page.
You know who this is for.
Actually, Finn didn't, but knowing Kurt it was probably for himself and more importantly, his passing grade. Finn knew he wasn't supposed to be reading the handmade children's book. It was one of Kurt's creative writing projects, and his step-brother had expressly forbidden him from touching it.
Of course, Finn rationalized, that was before Kurt had actually turned it in for a grade. And Kurt had claimed the reason he couldn't touch it was because the binding wasn't set yet. Surely it would've set by now. So…there shouldn't be any harm in looking at it. Children's books were cute. And now that they were legally brothers, Kurt's little book would quite possibly be perfect material for blackmailing him. Because that's what brothers do, right? At least that was one of the "brother benefits" Puck had mentioned about the situation.
Finn flipped the page to the first page of the story. He gazed at the illustration on the first page, smiling as he noticed that the bunnies were undoubtedly fashioned after their new family. The father bunny wore a tux but also a trucker hat that looked just like Burt's. The mother bunny totally had his mom's hairstyle peeking out from a wedding veil. Standing behind her was an exaggeratedly tall bunny that towered over all the others. He was wearing a football jersey-it even had his number on it. And on Burtbunny's side…Finn almost laughed at the smaller bunny with a vest, a fashionable scarf and what he imagined Kurt would deem a fabulous hat.
Finn frowned as he realized that it kind of looked like the younger bunnies were kind of glaring at each other.
When my father wed my new step-mother
I gained for myself the oddest brother.
Odd? Finn wasn't odd. If anyone in this household was odd, it had to be Kurt. I mean, come on, had the boy even looked in his own closet? Those outfits were far from normal. And need he even begin talking about his step-brother's room decorations?
He lives his life to people please.
And sometimes prays to his Grilled Cheese.
There was absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to please people. In fact, that's a very good thing. Pleasing people makes them like you, and if they like you they listen to you and they don't throw you into garbage cans or shoot you with paint ball guns. There's nothing weird about wanting that.
But, okay, perhaps Kurt did have at least a little bit of a point with that last thing. But it was a one-time…well, three time deal. It wasn't like he was ever going to do it again.
Probably.
And if he did, he'd never ever tell Kurt about it. Now that had been a pretty big mistake.
Finn flipped forward a few more pages, almost afraid to find out what else Kurt found odd about him.
He has an excessively short attention span
Yet has a bizarre obsession with our mailman.
Finn's eyes widened. How the hell did Kurt know about that? Had Quinn told him? Rachel, maybe? Oh God. Had Mom? He closed the book, letting it drop onto Kurt's desk.
Curiosity got the better of him, though, and he picked it back up.
I once saw him as my shining knight
Finn felt his face heating up as he read the line. He knew that Kurt liked him and all, but…shining knight?
Now I see him as a constant fight.
Finn frowned. He didn't mean to, but…he and Kurt did seem to fight a lot. Truth be told, he kind of missed it when Kurt really looked up to him.
Like when he says my clothes are draggy.
Well, Finn thought, come on, Kurt! You wear skirts! According to Rachel you sometimes even wear corsets. Finn wasn't quite clear on what a corset was, but it wasn't something a guy normally wore.
Or when he calls my sofa saggy.
Finn scowled. He'd never once said anything bad about Kurt's sofa. If anything it was too stiff, hardly sagg…oh. Finn realized the even Kurt was actually referring to and flushed. Yeah, he probably deserved that. Not that Kurt was entirely innocent, but he should never have used that term.
Finn flipped past the next few pages, fearing that they were simply pointing out more of his faults.
Would I, could I share a house
With the son of Dad's new spouse?
Did Kurt really have those doubts? Finn did; he wasn't sure that he could handle living with Kurt considering the way the other boy was always mooning over him and everything…but then it seemed that Kurt was quite over that.
But then he got me out of an awful mess,
While wearing an outrageous red rubber dress.
Finn groaned. That hadn't been his fault! He would never have worn that if Kurt hadn't…well…if he hadn't messed everything up by saying the word that shall never be spoken again. Still, the lines seemed as though Kurt was starting to counter all the previous faults he'd found with Finn.
Finn's heart started warming as he read the next few pages, which were, indeed, quite flatteringly all the things that Kurt had grown to love about his new brother. His kindness and sweetness and his way of soothing things over with grand gestures. So…he was no longer a knight in shining armor; he'd been taken off that pedestal. But the friendship they had now was even better.
He couldn't help but grin as he read the final lines.
I couldn't ask for better kith and kin.
Thank you, thank you, for my new brother, Finn.
"Love you, too, Kurt."
He filed the book away for future blackmail anyway.
