Falling for you: Chapter 1: Introduction
Whil-o-whisp
Fandom: south Park KennyxZeMole (christophe)
Word count: 1,093 for this chapter
A/n: ORIGINAL 3/22/2009: Yeah, I pair them sometimes. This is another one of those late night stories that I really need to stop because they keep me up LAWLAWLAWL idk. Well, enjoy. Kenny has a dirty mouth.
NEW 7/1/2009: This is a remake of the original FALLING FOR YOU, thusly, same story, better written. I changed it from third person to first person Kenny's point of view, and also, its now five chapters long (including introduction, excluding the original). It's still Kenny and Christophe, still has the same plot, just, better. Kenny has an even dirtier mouth now, lol. The original is at the end of the five chapters, i am leaving it as is. I hope you enjoy this!!!!
Disclaimer: hahahahahahahah, hahahahahahahaaaaaaaaahahahaha, you really thought I was pretending to own this? hahahaha
High school bores the shit out of me, truthfully. It's all girls and gossip and academics. It sucks major fucking butt, nothing fun ever happens. No zombies or crap people attacks, it's nothing like south Park Elementary. Fuck, we aren't even in South Park anymore. Shitty ass town like that with a high school? As if. Nope, we're at the enthralling, ever so prestigious mind control camp innocently named NORTH Park High. Now, we south parkers and the north parkers, we don't like each other much. Well, most of us. The ones that were born here anyway, can't say much for foreign exchange students from hell or British pansies from Yardale.
The hatred between us… Parkers or whatever has no meaning, or reason, and it's only made worse by the most recent switch. You see, we are the unlucky ones, my class and I; we got fucked by the school system, again. We're the test subjects, this year our test, or as Kyle calls it 'The Screw up', though, I'm more inclined to Cartman's name for it, 'The cluster fuck to North Park'
Before the big cluster fuck to North Park, the middle school students who graduated on and actually went to High school were shipped off to a slightly nicer, less prestigious mind control camp called Middle High School (Okay kids, wrap your minds around this one. It's a High school, called Middle. Weird, huh?). However, our darling mayor in all her lesbian wisdom decided the price for sending us brats all the way over to the next town over cost way too much and lumped us in with the retard school.
Well, we're still together though, our gang as we aptly call it. All four of us, occasionally three when Cartman decides to start his own group. He's still a fat ass. Tall, but still fat. He hasn't changed a lot, still hates Jews, poor people and hippies. He still thinks 9/11 was a conspiracy by republicans, and he still hates Kyle. I think the feeling's mutual. Kyle's changed a bit, not much though. He straightens his hair now, something Cartman delights in making fun of him about. I think it's stupid, he looks good with his hair straightened so he couldn't really make fun of him.
Okay, so there's the girly aspect, but whatever. Kyle's kind of still Jewish, but not really. Just in name. He needs something to put down on the surveys. He finally took Cartman's advice and told his mom to go fuck herself, that, I'm proud he did, but he's still frightened of her. Otherwise, he's the same. Still hates Cartman, still tries to make sure I eat on a daily basis (I love him sometimes), and he's still the smartest person in school. Of course, he's started slacking off, but who doesn't in high school?
People try to beat him up sometimes, key phrase being try. Hard to beat up Kyle Broflovski when his 'super best friend' crush is the quarterback. Stan's changed a bit, not much. He's tanner now, not that pale ass kid who complained about stupid people (he still has no respect for adults), and wittier. Better at sports too, though, I thought this was impossible at one point, he carried the team back in South Park. He still has a crush on Wendy Test-a-tit though, bitch a woman she is, lucky she's a lesbian now. Always knew Bebe would bring her round sooner or later.
They're kind of fun to watch. Stan and Kyle, not Bebe and Test-a-tit, though they're pretty fun too. Kyle's pretty obvious and Stan's pretty oblivious. Even Butters knows the Jew's got the hotts for Stan. Too bad all of Stan's brains are spent on school work. Irony, huh. Oh, Stan's friends with one of the Goth kids now, well, sort of. The tiny one and him have the same creative writing class, go figure. Kids like six years younger than us and already in high school. The next Kyle or Ike Broflovski. Ike's in that class too I think.
Nothing's changed. I still die about once a week, twice if Damien's feeling a bit lonely. He goes to the high school too, but only twice a week, sometimes on Wednesdays when Satan's in a good mood. Ever since the bad break up, Satan's been a bit more bipolar. Other than that, my deaths are still accidents, if you can call the North Parkers antics accidents. Just a month ago they threw a javelin at me while I was waiting for Stan's football practice to be over to get a ride home. Uncanny aim those track guys, impaled me right through my brain.
Ever since they found out my immortal status, they'd taken great delight in killing me on bad days and not getting in trouble. They call most of their antics freak accidents, like when the satellite fell on my head back in the third grade and I turned into a zombie and infected everybody. I miss that crap, torturing Tweek, sneaking out and TP'ing people's houses, or even when we used Kyle's dead grandma to scare the sixth graders, which didn't work, but it was still fun. Got to see my favorite band in concert so it wasn't all wasted.
Strangely enough, though I'll never tell him this, (he'd probably call me a fag), I miss Mr./Mrs. Garrison sometimes too. Sure he was a retard fucker, but there was just something so amusing about him. First he's straight, then he's gay, then he was a transsexual woman, who is straight, then he was a lesbian, and then he wanted his penis back and became a man again. What's not to love about that fucker? Seriously! Well, other than his puppet, or… puppets. Mr. Hat is a fucking devil rapist, I swear. Mr. Garrison teaches at the middle school now, trying his damnedest not to get transferred to North Park with Ms. Victoria. I'm pretty sure she's a lesbian too.
No, not much has changed, except schools. The Goths still hang out and smoke behind the dumpsters all day, every day, though sometimes the red one and the curly one would disappear for a while (probably to go fuck in whatever bathroom's deserted at the time), Craig and his gang still hate Cartman, Tweek's still a spastic dork and addicted to coffee, Token's still rich, Gregory's still an asshole, Kyle's still smart, Stan's still a jock, Cartman's still a dick, and I'm still Poor. Nothing had changed, and it was all rather boring.
A/N: KEEP READING! THERE ARE FOUR MORE CHAPTERS!
