The Discourteous Challenger
By Tie-dyed Trickster and AgentMalkere
Note: This segment is one of three that was written in collaboration with my sister – she started it, and I completed it and edited them so they flowed better. Because this series is an example of 'gosh, I had this great story idea, wish someone else would write it for me'… for her. Freaking sisters, getting you to write freaking epics for them…
Set four months after Desert Bandit in the Jungle. (by this point, Bulma has been to Geta's 'nest' and seen his attack pod. She's not entirely sure what it is, though (other than very high tech), because Geta won't let her open it up. Or take out all the pillows and blankets, they're arranged just so, he doesn't want her messing them up.) Also, please keep in mind… this is Tien before he reformed. I like Tien, Tien is awesome, he just happens to still be a jerk at the moment.
It wasn't that the village was small that bothered him. It was actually fairly large, considering how remote and isolated it was. No, it was more that, around the edges, it looked as though the village had grown directly out of the jungle it was surrounded by. Towards the center the homes and shops looked relatively modern, some even bore the distinctive Capsule Corp logo. On the outskirts, however, the houses were made from rough-cut wood, clay, and thatch. They were so home-made that they were practically organic.
Tien Shinhan wrinkled his nose as his feet touched down lightly on the ground. This was beneath him – this place, this task… A job like this, it should be given to the novices, not someone like him, second only to Master Taopaipai himself in terms of skill and power! But Master Tsuru had ordered it, and so here he had come. Because some people were just too stupid to live, so Tien was to make sure they stopped doing both.
"Tien, are you sure this is the right place?" Chaotzu asked as he landed next to him, "I can't imagine someone who trained with our master ending up here."
Tien sighed. "That's precisely the point, Chaotzu; no one who'd been trained by the Crane Sen'nin would ever debase themselves by coming here. Clearly this imposter is claiming to be of the Crane School to inflate his own reputation, and it is our job to put a stop to this besmirching of the Master's name."
"Oh, right," Chaotzu nodded and gave Tien a bright smile, "I remember now!"
Tien sighed again. His much shorter associate was rather distractible and didn't always listen as well as he should. Then again, he was still only fourteen. He would learn. Hopefully before the next Tenkaichi Budokai.
Together they walked towards the center of the village. Flying into the center of town was dramatic, but tended to scare the locals, and the last thing Tien wanted was to scare off the Crane School imposter before he had a chance to deal with the soon-to-be-dead idiot. Also… buildings all tended to look pretty much the same from the air, and landing dramatically at the wrong location tended to rather detract from the sort of image the Crane School tried to uphold. Finding the local dojo would be much easier on foot. Though, given the exceptionally haphazard organization of this village, finding a guide might be a wise idea if they wanted to find the place before nightfall. Or at all. Honestly, this place was like a practical study in chaos theory, the roads twisting and meandering aimlessly…
At that moment, a young man rounded a corner further up the road, heading in the opposite direction as the Crane students. He was short, with a flame of black hair and no shirt, and the large canvas knapsack he had on his back appeared to be stuffed with groceries. Tien waved him down and did his best to be... not too abrupt. "You there – where's the local dojo?" he tried to supress his grimace, but wasn't very successful. He disliked relying on others.
"The dojo?" the young man grinned at him, obviously completely unaware of what the crest on Tien and Chaotzu's changshans meant, "You're heading the wrong way if you're trying to get there. Don't worry, though, everyone gets lost at least once their first time here! And their second time. And their third. Actually, it's easier just to get born here in the first place…" he trailed off at Tien's scowl, "Anyway, dojo! I'm actually heading that way myself to meet some friends – I'll show you how to get there if you like."
"Thanks!" chirped Chaotzu, who was still a little too friendly for his own good when he wasn't concentrating, a fact that Tien… didn't find nearly as grating as he should. In any case, it would be poor form to correct his fellow student like this in front of outsiders – it could potentially be viewed as weakness within the school. So he merely gave a silent nod of agreement. He couldn't wait to get out of this place.
And the stranger was right – Tien wouldn't have found the place on his own. The dojo was at the end of a maze of side streets – the only way they would have ever found it on their own would have been through pure luck.
The sliding doors of the dojo had been pulled back to let the warm breeze circulate through. Inside, Tien could see several younger pupils in homemade gis practicing on the mats, watched over by some older students. Their guide, meanwhile, bounded cheerfully up the steps ahead of them, leaving his backpack in the shade on the porch.
"Hi all! Hi Bulma, hi Yamcha!" he waved to a blue-haired young woman and young man who looked to be about Tien's age, with long black hair and some prominent facial scars. The woman, Bulma, was sitting off to one side and watching while the man, Yamcha, practiced forms from an unfamiliar style. She looked up and waved at the greeting.
Their guide grinned, then went over to a tall man with wild white hair, to whom he bowed formally from the waist. "Good morning, Master Moo-shun."
"Good morning, Geta," the old man smiled. His face had the colour and wrinkles of a very friendly walnut, which was a little odd, since Tien didn't usually judge walnuts based on their amiability, but it really was the only way to describe him. The man, Moo-shun, gave Tien and Chaotzu a quick, curious look, "And who are these people whom you have brought with you?"
Geta straightened up with bright smile, then frowned. "I… don't actually know. I forgot to ask. I do know they were looking for the dojo, though! And I was coming here anyway, so, yeah! It all worked out?" he gave a hopeful smile.
Master Moo-shun shook his head with fond resignation and turned to give Tien and Chaotzu an appraising look. He frowned slightly as he noted the crest of the Crane School on their changshans, but his face quickly smoothed (well, smoothed as much as it could) back into a friendly expression. "Welcome to my humble dojo, gentlemen. I am Moo-shun, the ki-sensing master. How may I be of assistance?"
Tien stepped forward with a scowl. Finally, he could get this demeaning task over and done with. "My name is Tien Shinhan, and this is my associate Chaotzu. Our master, the Crane Sen'nin, has sent us out here to… deal with the imposter in your dojo who claims to be one of his students."
Master Moo-shun wrinkled his eyebrows. It gave the impression of two very fuzzy caterpillars trying to do battle on his forehead. "Students of Master Tsuru? I have no one in my dojo who would make such claims."
Tien snorted in disbelief, and Chaotzu chose this moment to speak up as well, trying for intimidating like Tien and… not quite succeeding. "Yeah right! We have it on good authority that someone here is claiming to know the Dancing on Air technique, and that they're teaching it to people! That's a secret Crane School technique and now we're here to challenge them so they can no longer beturge-"
"Besmirch," Tien automatically corrected.
"-besmirch Master Tsuru's name!" Chaotzu finished without missing a beat.
There was an awkward silence as the entire dojo stared at them in confusion.
"Dancing on Air? What on earth are you- oh." A look of comprehension dawned on Master Moo-shun's face. "I believe they are referring to you, Geta." And he gestured at their guide, who had been edging towards the blue-haired woman as Tien and Moo-shun talked.
"Him?" Tien gaped at the same time Geta blurted out, "Me?"
The youth turned to give Tien a surprised look, them back to his teacher. "But I've never even heard of this 'Crane School' place! How could I have stolen one of their techniques?"
"I wouldn't know, I don't make a habit of trying to understand the minds of lesser warriors," Tien sneered, then stalked forward. "I hearby challenge you to combat for the right to your life, for thinking to steal from the Crane School." It was a formality, but a necessary one for a public job like this one – less legal work for the Master to go through later.
Geta continued to look puzzled, though, to Tien's surprise, he smiled at the challenge. "I still have no clue what you're talking about, but I am always open to new opponents!"
Moo-shun however looked doubtful. "Are you sure you wish to challenge him? He is the strongest in this dojo – indeed, the strongest student I have ever taught."
Tien stared at the man for a moment. Was Moo-shun- was Moo-shun really asking him whether he was confident enough to continue? Then he scoffed. "That boy? He doesn't even have a black belt – it's brown!"
The so-called champion looked down at his waist where the ratty brown belt clung – ugh, he hadn't even taken good care of it, the thing was hairy. Geta, however, seemed undeterred. "I haven't taken the black belt test. Besides, you aren't wearing one at all."
This was true, Tien was attired in the traditional uniform of the Crane School, including the hat and long changshan. "I'm beyond black belt level," he replied coolly.
"Oh, well, that's okay, then." The so-called champion smiled at him, and all this smiling was starting to get on Tien's nerves. He was the finest disciple of the Crane School since Master Taopaipai, and this entire issue was so far beneath him that he wouldn't see it even if he looked down, but his master had sent him here, so Tien had come. Removing his hat and changshan, he handed both to Chaotzu, who scurried off the mat excitedly.
Tien sighed. To be honest… he'd known Chaotzu since the boy was given to the Crane School at age four, and, though he called Chaotzu his associate, really… if there was anyone in the world he would deign to call his friend, it would be this boy. Which was why he snapped 'With dignity!' telepathically instead of out loud as Chaotzu forgot he was representing Crane School. Again. Chaotzu stopped bouncing on the sidelines and straightened up, and Tien turned back to Geta. "Enough talk, boy," he sneered, "You claim to be the champion of this dojo? Then prepare to be shown how wrong you are, and to suffer for thinking to steal the techniques of the Crane School!"
The flame-haired youth tilted his head to the side. "If you're sure you want to…" he shrugged and turned to Moo-shun.
The old master nodded, then turned to the rest of the students, who had been surreptitiously watching. "Clear the mats, students, we have a discourteous challenger."
Tien raised an eyebrow at the 'discourteous,' but wasn't overly bothered by it. What did bother him was the lack of fear he seemed to be inspiring in Moo-shun's pupils, who chattered excitedly as they followed their instructor's orders.
"All right!"
"Nobody's been this rude about a challenge in months!"
"This is going to be awesome!"
Stupid backwater hicks – they didn't even know enough to be afraid. Hell, the scarred youth was eyeing Tien like he wouldn't mind fighting him himself.
"It's going to be fun to see it from the sidelines this time," the youth in question said quietly to her as he flopped down next to the blue-haired woman.
She grinned at him, then nudged him in the ribs. "So, whadda'ya think? On a scale of one to ten?"
"Bulma…"
"No, come on, one to ten!"
He rolled his eyes, then gave Tien a slightly appraising look. "I'd say… a solid 6.2, for the chest and arms. Many points off for the bad attitude, though."
"Mmm," she nodded, "More points off if he's wearing the hat – seriously, bobble hats are a crime to humanity if you're between nine and sixty."
Tien sneered and stopped paying attention. Sentiment and frivolity. He had more important things to do, and returned his focus to the so-called champion-
…who had simply sauntered to the space across from Tien and was standing there, hands in his pockets, a mildly curious expression on his face. He was obviously used to being a big fish in a little puddle – perhaps it would be mildly amusing to see his face when he realized just what he was up against. Tien smirked.
"The outcome of this match has been decided before it is begun, boy."
The youth shrugged. "You're probably right. And my name's Vegeta, by the way, only you can- no, no, wait, on second thought, you can just stick with that. You seem like kinda a jerk. So, wanna fight me anyway, even if we know how it's going to end?"
Tien gave a brief nod. He had an assignment to carry out.
"Challenger Tien Shinhan versus Champion Vegeta," Moo-shun announced from the sidelines, "Begin!" and he clapped his hands together, presumably to signal the start of the match.
Tien glanced at him in disbelief. A clap? Really? They couldn't even afford a small gong to start matches with? He turned back to his opponent to find Vegeta… still standing with his hands in his pockets, a vaguely curious expression on his face. The triclops straightened up, scowling. "What are you doing?!"
"…waiting for you to attack?" Vegeta answered, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"You haven't even taken a stance!"
"Oh! Right!" the youth shuffled his feet into a more square position, but otherwise didn't do anything. " 'kay. Ready."
…had Tien mentioned how beneath him all this was?
Deciding he'd been more than generous, especially since he really was here to make a kill, not just spar, Tien dropped back into his stance and attacked-
-and staggered as his fist met nothing but empty air. He spun to see Vegeta looking over his shoulder at him. "When did you get over there?" the youth asked, surprise evident in his tone.
Tien frowned. Surely he couldn't have misjudged his aim by that much- But he must have- And- "Is there a reason you're just standing there instead of attacking?"
Vegeta shrugged. "I thought I'd let you get a hit or two in first. I mean, I can attack if you want me to, but-" he tilted his head to the side in consideration just in time to avoid Tien's fist, "I dunno, doesn't seem fair somehow."
"Cocky, aren't you?"
"Confident in my abilities." He gave a toothy grin, stepped backwards, and tripped over his own feet, falling down just in time for Tien's kick to whiff over his head, not even brushing that ridiculous hair of his. "Ow."
The fight continued in this manner for a few more minutes, with Tien attacking and Vegeta stumbling, losing his balance, or getting distracted at just the right moment to avoid getting hit. Finally, Tien had had enough.
"I refuse to believe a clown like you could have defeated all those fighters like you're supposed to have, or that you're the one who could have stolen one of the Crane Sen'nin's techniques! Either fight seriously or bring out the real champion, I will not be-"
"Why?"
Tien glared, cross at having been interrupted mid-tirade. "What do you mean, 'why?'"
"Why should I take this seriously?" Vegeta asked curiously, hands still in his damn pockets, "I mean, you aren't. If you were, you would have hit me by now." He grinned at Tien's expression. "I'm the champion of the ki-sensing dojo, Shinhan – did you really think I wouldn't be able to tell that you were holding back?"
Tien growled. "You want serious? Try this on for size!" and he flashed forward to punch Vegeta-
-who stood there and just let the blow connect with his chest. The shorter teen grunted a bit, bending forward. Then he straightened, a sunny smile on his face.
"Awesome! My turn now!" and he nailed Tien with a kick that sent him flying off the mats and would have ended the match, if not for the technique that had started the whole thing in the first place. The triclops halted in mid-air, straightening to glare at the champion, who looked like a light was coming on in his head. "Wait, hold up a sec – is that what you've been going on about? The 'dancing on air' thing – it's a fancy name for flying?"
"Of course! What did you think it was?!" Tien demanded.
Vegeta shrugged. "The hell should I know? I mean, Yamcha's 'Wolf Fang Fist' doesn't have anything to do with wolves or fangs-"
"It's metaphorical!" came a shout from the sidelines.
"Regardless," Vegeta waved a dismissive hand, casually dodging a kick from Tien at the same time before returning the hand to his pocket, "All I'm saying is that you can't always tell what an attack's going to do based on its name. Like the Goblin Punch, for example-"
"Is this really the time to be discussing this?" Tien interrupted angrily.
"Why not? 'snot like I'm doing anything important right now." Vegeta gave another obnoxiously toothy smile.
The bald teen snarled, furious at the mockery he was receiving. But, try as he might, he couldn't lay a hand on his infuriating opponent.
"Really," Vegeta smirked as another blow breezed past him, "I'd kinda expected more from you. I got a better fight from the last guy who challenged, and you've got way more ki than he did at the time, and you know how to use it! But this is really kinda…" he avoided another punch-kick combo, mind obviously not on the fight, then nodded sharply as the word he was looking for came to him. "Boring! That's it- you're boring me. So I'mma end it now."
And he kicked Tien in the stomach with enough force to both wind him and send him flying into the dojo wall, sliding to land on the ground in a heap.
"Out-of-bounds," Moo-shun announced, "Match to Vegeta!"
Tien looked up to see the youth in question standing there, grinning over his shoulder at someone, hands still in his pockets, and he saw red. He'd always secretly dreamed of meeting his equal in martial arts, of being able to truly push himself to his limits, but that was not what this match had been. This had been a mockery, a far superior warrior toying with one of lesser skill for his own amusement and it grated on Tien to have been cast in the latter role. That he had gone into the fight planning to do the same thing didn't matter, or even really occur to him. He was livid and, beyond that, he had a job to do. Which was why he reacted as he did, standing and leveling one finger at his infuriating opponent.
"DODONPA!"
Vegeta turned, saw the deadly ki blast coming for him-
-and kicked it through the roof.
Tien didn't have time to finish gaping before he found himself flat on his back, Vegeta on his chest, pinning Tien's arms to his sides with his knees, and, struggle as he might, the taller youth couldn't get free. Vegeta had his hands held in front of him slightly, one palm facing up the other down, parallel to each other and ki slowly gathering between them.
"In case you're wondering why you can't get up in spite of the fact that I'm surprisingly tiny, what I'm doing right now is kinda the opposite of flying," Vegeta said, staring down at him. "And you didn't have to do that, you know. You could have shouted, or demanded a rematch – an honorable one this time. We could have fought all-out, and you could have at least walked away knowing you'd done your best. It could have been fun." He looked a little wistful and Tien sneered.
"The match was always going to end that way. I'm a disciple of the Crane Sen'nin, and you stole one of our techniques. There is no future where my master would have suffered you to live."
Vegeta stared at him for a moment. Then his gaze hardened, and the tiny ball of ki between his palms began to grow larger. "So that's how it is."
"That's how it is."
"Except, it's not," Vegeta said, staring down at him, eyes dark, "Because, as you found out? I'm stronger than you. A lot stronger. And now I have a choice, the choice of what to do with you, how to make you pay for coming to my home, endangering my family like this. I could break your bones. Take a limb. Blind you. Paralyze you. Kill you." The ball of ki grew larger and brighter with each suggestion, and Tien was starting to get a vague sense of… something from it, a- a feel of it, almost. Vegeta, meanwhile, kept talking, his eyes narrow and looking nowhere near as friendly as he had when they'd first met.
"There are so many things I could do to you right now, and they would all be so, so easy." He leaned forward, "But this is what I'm going to do." And he stood, dismissing the ball of ki and folding his arms, stepping away and scowling. "Go home, assassin. This dojo, this village, this jungle, and everyone in them – they're mine. They're mine and you leave them alone. Go away, leave us out of your power plays and your school squabbles, assassin. Leave us in peace."
Tien got cautiously to his feet, wary of another attack. "You should kill me. If you leave me alive, I'll just get stronger and come back to kill you."
Vegeta stared at him coldly for a moment, then sagged as if he were tired. "That's your choice," he said quietly, "Me, I'm just as happy not to have your blood on my hands. Go away, Shinhan, go get stronger and come back if you need to, maybe we'll both get the fight we're looking for if you do. But don't involve anyone else. And for now, just… go."
Tien stared at him for a moment longer, then narrowed his eyes. "You're no brown belt."
A spark rekindled in Vegeta's eyes at that. "Never said I was." And his belt uncurled from around his waist to become… a tail. "I just said I hadn't taken the black belt test."
A slight widening of the eyes was the only indication that Tien was at all surprised. Then he nodded once and turned. "Come, Chaotzu, we're leaving."
"But Tien…" the boy protested even as he moved to join him, carrying Tien's clothes.
"NOW, Chaotzu."
"Okay…"
Tien pretended not to see his friend sticking his tongue out at the dojo en masse as they left. Part of him was still fuming – the entire episode had been utterly humiliating, and he would be back for revenge against Vegeta. And yet…
Master Taopaipai was the finest martial artist Tien had ever seen, and the strongest, and Tien's goal in life had long been to surpass him and become the best. But the way that Vegeta fellow had moved, like Tien was standing still, and how he'd deflected the Dodonpa… Master Taopaipai couldn't do that. Maybe there was farther to go to be the best than he'd initially thought. And even now, as they made their way to the jungle's edge, part of Tien acknowledged this, acknowledged and took a harsh joy in it. If an obnoxious twit like Vegeta could get that strong, then Tien could get stronger; all he had to do was-
"Tien?"
The triclops' musings were cut short by Chaotzu, who was frowning in concentration. "Yes, Chaotzu?"
The pale boy looked straight ahead, brow furrowed. "That guy you fought, he had a monkey's tail, right?"
"Yes, Chaotzu."
"And he was all tricky and wily and stuff?"
"Yes, Chaotzu." Vegeta certainly played the part of the clown well enough.
"Okay." Chaotzu was silent as his friend and fellow student put his changshan and hat back on, and they rose up to fly back home. He'd been starting to think the boy would be silent for the whole trip when-
"Tien?"
He sighed. "Yes, Chaotzu?"
"Did you just get beat up by the Monkey King?"
"I-" Tien's eyes bugged out before he pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. "Yes, Chaotzu."
Because some battles just weren't worth fighting.
OoOoOoOoO
Quick note:Just so you all know, a new piece of Geta!verse will be going up every Friday until I run out. If I don't post a piece, and the last piece wasn't marked as the end of the story, it means I'm dead. Or late. Anyway, moving on.
As is probably eminently clear by now, Geta is not Vegeta. That said, nor is he Goku. He has a strong possessive/protective streak when it comes to things and people he cares about, and if you give him shit he is more than happy to give it right back. He also realised young that he was born with an amazingly convincing murder face when he chooses to use it, and is a consummate liar. He can't keep this sort of act up for long, though – too contrary to his nature.
Also, if this seems like kinda a harsh beat-down to you, please, let me assure you, it was actually very necessary. Because if had not happened now, it would have happened at the Budokai, and no one wants to see Tien this thoroughly curb-stomped at the Budokai (Yamcha, put your hand down, no you don't, I don't care how much he embarrassed you, we are being better people than this). Seriously, though, if this encounter or something similar had not taken place, Tien would have had no reason not to show up to the up-coming Budokai at the same power level he did in the original manga. And, given that everyone else is going to have trained a lot more by then and be way past the power levels they were at the start of that – Yamcha's been training with Geta and Moo-shun for about eight months now, and his power level is in the upper hundreds as a result, and he'll only be getting stronger (like I said, power levels are getting higher sooner in this world, but also leveling off faster, and the mad climb from the manga is being totally negated). Without a set-up like this, Tien would get creamed. I don't want Tien to get creamed. I like Tien. He just hasn't gotten hit with the character-development stick enough yet. Though… he's going to be different in this story. Not an out-right bad guy, but a more Piccolo-style character than his original incarnation is.
If you know what the Goblin Punch is, congratulations, you win fifty points and a cookie.
Also, this is actually one of the more 'recent' pieces I wrote for this series, and I remember writing out 'Vegeta' in it was really weird, because I'd spent months and months by this point referring to him as 'Geta.'
Epilogue:
Geta spent the rest of the day fixing the dojo roof.
