The Witch and The Doctor
The Tardis materializes in a forest, and two people step out.
CLARA:
Where are we?
DOCTOR:
I have no idea. I pressed the random button!
CLARA:
The Tardis has a random button?
DOCTOR:
Yes. And a pudding button. Yum.
CLARA:
Pudding? Why a pudding button?
DOCTOR:
I get hungry when I'm flying the Tardis sometimes.
Clara doesn't have time to reply. Men armed with swords rush toward them.
DOCTOR:
Ah. Hello. Could you kind gentlemen tell us where we are?
SMITHY:
We saw you appear from afar. What is that box behind you? Why are you not dressed?
Smithy, who appears to be in charge of the men, stares at the Doctor and Clara's strange clothes.
DOCTOR:
I asked first. Where are we and what year is it?
SMITHY:
This is Andover. Are you mad? It's 1692.
Smithy turns to the men armed with swords, and bows and arrows.
SMITHY:
TIE THESE PEOPLE UP! I have reason to believe they are witches. We shall take them to Prenderghast.
DOCTOR:
Well, shit. Clara, this is Massachusetts in the early 1690's. The Salem Witch trials. We couldn't have landed in a worse place.
CLARA:
But we're not witches! At least, I'm not. You're not a witch are you?
DOCTOR:
Sadly no. Merlin refused to share his powers with me. Ahh, ol' Merly. We used to get drunk together-but that's not the point. We need to get out of here.
The men tie the two up and force them to walk ahead of them through the forest. The men push the Tardis onto its side, and are using horses and ropes to pull it along with them.
DOCTOR:
Careful with that! I just had her waxed and buffed.
CLARA:
That's hardly important now Doctor. But can't we just prove that we're not witches and they'll let us go?
DOCTOR:
No, Clara. It's not like that. 1692 is a terrible stain in the history of Earth. They murdered people, good people, because of hysteria. They already think we're witches because we materialized in front of them. Not to mention our odd clothes.
SMITHY:
Silence! You witches will not tempt us with your sinful and evil words. May the Lord deliver us from your devilry.
The men push Clara and the Doctor into the town square, filled with children playing games, and women tending to fires and cooking food.
A tall, middle aged man sits in a chair, little children surrounding him. He's telling them a story.
Clara and the Doctor are tied to the large oak tree in the middle of the square. Several men search their clothes for weapons. They take the sonic screwdriver, a yo-yo, and lipstick. They find nothing in Clara's pockets.
Smithy walks over to the man talking with the children and whispers into his ear. The man walks over to the tree.
PRENDERGHAST:
Folks, witchcraft is a serious accusation. Smithy, what have these strange people done to make you think they're witches?
SMITHY:
They appeared in that box right in front of us! It came out of no where! The sorcerer did not know what year it was. All signs they came from their coven to turn us against the Lord!
DOCTOR:
Oi! We're not from any coven. I'm the Doctor, and this is my...companion.
PRENDERGHAST:
Companion? Concubines are not legal here.
CLARA:
HEY! I'm not his concubine! We're just friends!
DOCTOR:
Just friends?
CLARA:
DOCTOR!
DOCTOR:
Sorry.
The people in the square begin to chant and throw things at the two tied to the tree.
CROWD:
WITCHES! HEATHENS! DEMONS!
MAN:
GIVE EM' THE TEST!
MAN 2:
BURN THESE WITCHES!
The crowd cheers. Prenderghast leans into the Doctor.
PRENDERGHAST:
What is your name?
DOCTOR:
I'm the Doctor. And I don't seem to have a nature fetish in this regeneration, so untie me and my friend please.
PRENDERGHAST:
How can a man have no name? But you are not a man. You are a demon, sent here by Satan to deceive us and damn us!
Prenderghast turns to the rowdy crowd.
PRENDERGHAST:
WE SHALL GIVE THEM THE TEST!
DOCTOR:
Damn.
CLARA:
What's the test?
DOCTOR:
They're going to put us in sacks and try to drown us. If we float up, we're witches. If we drown, then obviously they were wrong. I don't know how to get out of this.
Prenderghast and the men huddle together, and begin to make plans for the test. A small boy, about 9, wanders over to the tree and stares up at the Doctor.
DOCTOR:
Hello little one.
BOY:
My momma says you're a sorcerer.
DOCTOR:
I'm many things. But I'm not a sorcerer.
The boy eyes the small sack a few feet in front of the tree, filled with the Doctor's possessions.
DOCTOR:
Young man, will you open the bag?
The boy shakes his head no.
CLARA:
Just open it, kid!
DOCTOR:
Clara, shush. That's not helping.
CLARA:
Forgive me if I'm a little frantic. I'm only about to die at the hands of angry Americans!
DOCTOR:
If you open the bag I'll give you some candy. I promise.
The boy slowly lifts up the bag and opens it, peering it.
DOCTOR:
See the green stick? Hand it to me. Please.
The boy slowly takes out the sonic screwdriver. He walks forward and pushes it towards the Doctor's tied up but outstretched hand. The Doctor just has time to pocket the screwdriver before Prenderghast turns around.
PRENDERGHAST:
TOM! GET AWAY FROM HIM!
A woman runs forward and picks Tom up. She smacks him and begins to berate him. Tom looks over at the Doctor.
TOM:
Where's my candy?
DOCTOR:
I lied.
The men untie the Doctor and Clara and march them up to the tall cliff overlooking the ocean. The sun is now setting, and the ocean is getting rowdy. Torches and various fires poke into the night sky. The crowd also drags the Tardis up to the cliff. They begin to pile wood around it.
Clara and the Doctor stare out over the edge of the cliff. The men suddenly separate the two, and begin to shove Clara into a human sized sack.
CLARA:
HELP! DOCTOR! HELP ME!
DOCTOR:
CLARA! PRENDERGHAST, PLEASE! We mean you no harm! Just let us go and we'll never come back to this place.
PRENDERGHAST:
You'll just go back to your coven and bring back more devilry! Now I am sure of your witchery! Throw the girl over!
Clara struggles in the bag as the men heave it up into the air...and down into the ocean 50 feet below. Clara screams, and then it's silent as she hits the surface.
Underwater, she struggles for a few seconds before the bag sinks.
DOCTOR:
CLARA! She's not a witch! You've killed her you bastards!
The men inch towards the tied up Doctor, and prepare the bag for him. They untie him, and in a flash, he reaches into his pocket, and pulls out the sonic screwdriver.
TOM:
IT'S HIS MAGIC WAND!
DOCTOR:
NOBODY MOVE!
The men rush toward the Doctor, armed with pitchforks and torches. He thrusts the sonic screwdriver into the air and, an ear splitting sound fills the air. The crowd doubles over in pain, ears bleeding.
The Doctor takes the moment to his advantage, and jumps into the ocean, tearing off the ropes as he falls.
Prenderghast yells.
PRENDERGHAST:
BURN THE EVIL BOX! RID THIS TOWN OF SIN!
The men throw their torches and set the Tardis ablaze.
The Doctor hits the ocean and begins to dive and search for Clara. After a minute of searching, he's found nothing,
Suddenly, the bag is down to his right. There's no motion in it. He pulls the surprisingly light bag to the surface, and like an Olympic swimmer, paddles them over to the cave that is under the cliff.
He takes a breath and breathes in oxygen for the first time in several minutes. He frantically unties the sack and pulls Clara out. She's not moving.
DOCTOR:
CLARA! IT'S ME! CLARA OPEN YOUR EYES!
Clara doesn't respond. The Doctor begins CPR, but she's gone. He pounds her chest again and again. No response. He screams.
The Doctor pulls out his soggy sonic screwdriver and presses a button on it. The burnt Tardis begins to materialize inside the large cave. The waves from the ocean are starting to flood the cave. The Doctor shoves open the once vibrant blue box, now burnt black. He shuts the door and gently lays Clara on the console room floor.
The Doctor slowly walks to the console and dematerializes the Tardis.
A hologram comes to life next to the console. It's Clara.
CLARA:
Hello? Is it on? Ok. Doctor, it's me. The Tardis is helping me make this. If you're seeing this, I'm dead. Don't feel sad Doctor. We had lots of fun. I hope it was a good death though. Saving some children maybe? Or an epic kickass explosion?
The Doctor sighs. It wasn't a good death. It wasn't like falling off a tower, or radiation poisoning. She was shoved into a bag like an animal and drowned like a feral cat.
The Doctor buries her on Earth. A normal funeral, with her father and grandmother sobbing next to the frowning Doctor. The tombstone didn't mention her travels in time, or anything epic. Just Clara Oswin Oswald.
If ever you went to Andover, you could go into the library and dig through the archives. If you went back to 1692, you'd find the tale of the two sorcerers whose bodies they never found. The ones who appeared suddenly in the forest in a magical blue box, and were shoved off a cliff like wild animals.
END
