Octopussy vs Fiona Volpe

A competition for Jaws' affections but not only a competition now it's a duel!

One day Jaws was out and about and suddenly Octopussy came up to him and started flirting with him but not too long did the red head wench Fiona Volpe come up and got jealous. She and Octopussy both have feelings for Jaws. Jaws needs to pick one.

Jaws:(admiring himself in the mirror).

Octopussy:(comes up to him) hey Jaws lookin good.

Jaws: hi there Octopussy.

Octopussy: so Jaws are you busy later on?

Jaws: no why?

Octopussy: i was just thinking that maybe you and i could you know go on a date.

Jaws: i would love to.

Fiona Volpe:(comes up) hey Jaws.

Jaws: hi Fiona.

Fiona Volpe:(sees Octopussy) whoa whoa whoa who is she?

Octopussy: who is you?

Jaws: uh Octopussy this is Fiona and Fiona this is Octopussy.

Fiona Volpe: Jaws is mine!

Octopussy: oh really because last i heard he likes me more!

Fiona Volpe: oh really well i am about to change Jaws' mind so he'll pick me!

Octopussy: or maybe i'll pick you up and toss you out that window!

Fiona Volpe: you know what-

Jaws: ladies ladies there's only one way to settle this!

Octopussy: which is?

Jaws: i'll let you two fight but i'll give you space!

Fiona Volpe: i'd love to fight this!

Octopussy: i'd love to engrave my name on her pain gland!

Jaws: listen i was-

Octopussy:(pushes him aside) look ginger head why don't you just leave and let Jaws be mine!

Jaws: now Fiona don't-

Fiona Volpe: Ginger head?! ok prepare to have your face rearranged!

Jaws: Octopussy don't eve-

Octopussy: you're about to have your bone crumbled!

FIona Volpe: bring it!

They start to have a cat fight

Fiona slaps Octopussy

Octopussy judo tosses Fiona on a table which shatters into pieces

Fiona puts Octopussy in a head lock

Octopussy flips Fiona

Fiona and Octopussy are soon pulling hair and choking each other

Octopussy yells ,"Jaws loves me not you!"

Fiona yells, "no moron he loves me!"

Octopussy elbows her in the gut and then pushes her against a wall which cracks once she bangs her head

Fiona kicks Octopussy in the chest knocking her down

Octopussy grabs Fiona by the hair, pushes her through a sliding door, and puts Fiona's head into a swimming pool

Fiona now looking like a wet rat kicks her back and kicks her again in the gut

Octopussy knees her in the face

Fiona grabs a big shard of glass which is pointy and sharp and cuts Octopussy on her arm drawing blood

Octopussy not willing to throw in the towel punches Fiona in the face

Fiona not willing to surrender returns a punch to Octopussy and then throws Octopussy to the floor

Octopussy now having enough pounces on Fiona and kicks her in the head

ding ding ding Fiona is out cold and Octopussy has won and her reward/trophy is...Jaws!

Octopussy has won Jaws' heart

Jaws is happy

Octopussy now tired from the fight jumps into Jaws' arms and the two go up into the bed room and make love!

The end