N/A: Sorry for any mistakes, Brazilian trying to write in English here xD
Stiles heard that Derek was back in Beacon Hill the day before, but insisted in not looking for him. It was useless, anyway, he didn't have anything to say. Or maybe he did, but didn't have the guts to do so. The fact is that since Derek Hale left town, things took a turn to the worse, and they weren't that good to begin with.
He laid in his bed with a big American History textbook by his side. He had an exam in the following week and, even though he had the volume at his reach, he knew he wouldn't read it. He couldn't keep his mind in just one place and American History certainly wouldn't help.
He walked down the stairs, reaching for the living room. He turned the TV on and zapped through channels until he found some random Indian movie. He couldn't understand much of what was going on, much less the songs that began every 10 minutes, but still didn't change it.
Stiles got lost in his mind for a while, laying on his couch, not paying attention at all to the TV, when he heard a knock in the door. He stood up slowly, kicking the coffee table his father insisted in maintain on the middle of the room, even though he knew how clumsy his son was. He opened the door and when he saw Derek in front of him, showed all his surprise and confusion on his face.
"What are you doing here?" He asked with no reservations, observing the man in front of him. He looked drained, his beard, that used to be stubble, now took all his face. And, most of all, he looked worried.
"I heard you are having… troubles. I came to help."
"You can't help me." Stiles left the door open and came back to the couch in the same position he was before the werewolf knocked. He looked at the TV again, the lights dancing in front of him and, for a minute, his mind got lost again. He came back when he felt Derek's hand touching his shoulder.
"Stiles…" Derek called him and it didn't look like it was the first time. The boy shook his head, trying to fully wake up. "What is going on with you?"
"What is…" He laughed ironically. "Maybe what is not happening is a better question. I'm having nightmares and I can't sleep straight for days. My body is more uneasy than ever and the medication is not helping anymore. I'm having hallucinations all the time. My father never leaves the station because now he knows about the supernatural and that he can't stop it. I'm trying to help Scott because he is an Alpha now and he barely knows what to do, especially when his beta is dating his ex-girlfriend and…" He couldn't breathe for a second, all going through his head like an enormous storm. He couldn't control it. He couldn't hide from it. All he could do was get exposed and hope to survive.
Derek just stared at him, not sure what to do. He knew desperate Stiles, fearing his dad would get hurt, fearing ending up alone. But that Stiles in front of him was different, he seemed to have… given up. He looked like he had no strength to keep going and that scared Derek.
"We are… we are gonna solve this, Stiles, but you need to calm down." He tightened the grip in Stiles' shoulder, trying to calm him, wishing with that the boy could see things would work out. It didn't work.
"Solve this?" He laughed again, even though he couldn't find anything funny on the sentence. "You were not here, Derek. You left and we got to deal with all that crap by ourselves. I'm 16 and this is my life. Murder druids, crazy werewolves and hallucinations I don't understand. I have a History exam next week, but I can't think about it, because next week someone will probably end up dead in this freaking town and…"
He started to get uneasy again, his heart pounding. The blood coursed fast through his veins and his lungs seemed full of sand, as if there was no space for air. He tried to calm down, but it just got harder by the minute. It was his second panic attack that week and they got more frequent every day.
"Hey, hey." Derek shook him, trying to get his attention. "It's okay, you are save now. Your father is fine, Scott is fine, everyone is fine. We are gonna take care of this, but I need you to calm down."
Derek kept repeating that, but it didn't change anything. Stiles could barely hear him.
"That is why I came back, I… I know I shouldn't have gone, shouldn't have left you guys when you needed me, but… I needed to take care of me before helping you. This town stands for everything that hurt me throughout the years, my family, Kate, Jennifer, everything that I lost was here, but… I have a pack now. All of you. And I'm not leaving again. I'm gonna help you guys, I will…" He grabbed Stiles face, forcing him to meet his eyes. "I'm not going anywhere."
The werewolf almost jump from his sit when he felt the boy collapse on top of him, throwing his arms around him in a deep, desperate hug. He felt Stiles' breath get back to normal. Derek couldn't hug him back, too confused to know what to do. He just waited for the physical contact to end, trying to decide what to do next.
Soon enough, Stiles let him go and sat in front of him, looking a little uncomfortable with the situation. He scratched his head and finally turned the TV off.
"I'm sorry for… this." Stiles sighed. "It hasn't been easy."
"I can imagine." Derek confessed. "I didn't help much. But I will now. I promise. And I stay truth to my promises, Stiles."
"Okay."
