Say…do you remember?

Hey…Shizuru, do you remember the first time we met? I mean…when your eyes saw mine for the very first time. Before you spoke to me in the garden. I still have that time engraved in my memories. Our paths had crossed many times already in Fukaa academy. But you were always so well surrounded by those fan girls of yours. So I never really could have a look at the one they all praised.
But on a sunny afternoon, I had decided to skip math class. So I was sneaking out of school when I passed by a half-opened door. And there you were. While I was cowardly hiding against the wall I could hear your voice and see a little of your face. Standing in front of your class speaking to your classmates with such presence, assurance and ease, you just could not be ignored. And so I stared at that piece of face. I don't know for how long you knew I was there but when I finally came out of my thoughts, you were looking at me with a smile. And then I ran away from the slightly opened door.

By the time I noticed, I was thinking about you. Day and…sometimes at night. Even though I thought about you kind of often after that time… it was to avoid you better. As I said "you just couldn't be ignored" but still I tried. Not that in my opinion you weren't pretty but still… There was something about you I could not bear. So once again, I isolated myself from the world. Seeking to forget… to forget the suffering, to forget all about this world full of crap which I lived in. I had hidden myself in my unreachable fortress of loneliness. Surrounded by a thousand kilometres of lava ditch, I feared the pain I shunned it. To do so, I just made such to let no one in my life.