A/N: So this is my first fanfic in some time. It's been about seven years since one brought out the need in me to write...that feeling of being so compelled. Go FMA, you did this to me XD. This fic contains lyrics to a song that touched me the most. It's based off a current favorite of mine called "One Last Goodbye" by Anathema. By the way I do NOT own Full Metal Alchemist or the lyrics to One Last Goodbye and I'm not making any money off of them, so there you have it. Now read away my fellow RoyxEd LOVERS!!!

One Last Goodbye

Chapter One - Fade

He just couldn't believe it, his mind was still whirling with doubt, and no matter how he tried...and God did he try...there wasn't any way of avoiding the events that had taken place between him and a boy named Edward. He'd left Roy, left him for good. He'd never see that prodigy again. The thought sickened him, and he wasn't sure why. Could he...have feelings? The Flame Alchemist? Yes, he felt and right now his heart was wrenching and tightening in his chest. His stomach twisting and rolling.

He felt like he wanted to die, that would have been easier than trying to breathe at the moment. Not to mention he was angry too. Ed had given him a pretty mediocre goodbye. A slap on the hand, what the hell? After all Roy had done for him...After all the trouble that shrimp had caused him, he couldn't even shake the Lieutenant Colonel's hand. That wasn't enough for Roy, no, it could never have been enough. He wanted Ed, in a way a commanding officer shouldn't..

He knew their age difference...and well...Edward probably didn't even feel the same, how could he? Roy hadn't really shown any signs of affection toward the younger alchemist. Not a single adoration other than general concern, he'd been careful not to. He wanted to tell Ed himself, but now he'd waited all too long...his stomach took another turn...what the hell was going on with him? He cared all too much, and now he would wait...he would wait for eternity if that's what it took, because he refused to fall in love again.

How I needed you...how I grieved...now you're gone...

In my dreams, I see you...I awake...so alone...

I know you didn't mean to leave,

Your heart yearned to stay...

But the strength I always loved in you...

finally gave away..

Ed trudged through the mud, his boots covered in it, it had been raining all day and he hadn't been outside until now. It was dark, but he could see that the clouds were beginning to brake apart, showing an eerie crescent moon in the distance. Something about that was beautiful though. His thoughts wandered on many things, mostly on the Colonel. Who seemed to be intruding his every waking thought the past few months.

He considered the idea that he might have a crush on the older man, but the thought itself was entirely ridiculous. There was no way he could have feelings for another man, or for THAT man to be more specific. Or maybe Edward was just avoiding the truth, as usual. He didn't want to except that he might have a tiny crush on Mustang. Or the fact that it wasn't tiny. In reality his heart fluttered every time he saw him.

His breath hitched when the other man spoke to him, and he always felt quite nervous too. Perhaps that was why he always ended up acting like a jack ass. He couldn't help himself, it was easy to be angry, too keep his guard up. So many bad things haunted him that he wasn't sure if he could give his heart away. At the same time he yearned for nothing more than to let go. To be rid of all the anticipation.

Some how I knew, you would leave me this way...

...Some how I knew, you could never...

Never stay.

And in the early morning light,

After a silent, peaceful night...

You took my heart away...(and I grieved)