The Fireball

After his last victory over Cypher, who had been last seen running nekkid through the subway screaming something about evil vermin and little teeth, GuaRRand was feeling quite content with himself.

It was now almost 2 days ago and his next fight would be today.

He was curious about who he would have to fight next.

He walked over to the contest board and looked for his name.

"AlexGeeWiz vs Do'omaz" the board read

"Nice effect..a self reading board" said GuaRRand

"I can also hold conversations" The board announced

"Magic!!, what will they think of next" said GuaRRand

"Well, This Do'omaz will be np, i can take him with my arms tied behind my back, my feet crossed and my knees in my neck"

He felt quite confided, as usual.

The match wouldn't start for another 3 hours, so he would have loadsa time to find out what this Do'omaz guy was all about.

He walked over to another group of wizards and tried to fit into the conversation, hoping to find out if they knew something.

Wizard 1: ".So i said to Madonna, GURL, you HAVE to get that vogue stuff back, that was your best stuff evah!!"

Wizard 2: "I agree, i agree, after the vogue it went downhill. That last song of hers is the pits!!"

Wizard 3: "I still think that 'Material Girl' was her best song evah. It was Da Bomb man"

Wizard 1: "No No No, Vogue was definitely her best stuff. I mean, that wavy thing with her arms is just GENIUS!!"

Wizard 2: "I know what you mean, u mean this stuff, like so"

He starts to bend his knees, puts his arms above his arms and starts waving them around.

Wizard 1: "YES. Like that, exactly!!"

The first wizard joins in the dance.

Wizard 3: "Humpfff, i still think Material girl is the best song!!. You can't beat her walk in that video clip. And the work she does with that Boa thing around her neck.just MAGIC i tell ya"

GuaRRand watches the spectacle and decides they probably don't have any information he wants to know.

All right then, he would have to do without additional information about this Do'omaz.

No matter, he never ever EVER met anybody that could resist his Summon cloud of smelly sox or the sheer terror that his Bring out the dead spell would inflict.

No, he had things well in hand.

Time passed uneventful, except for the 16V turbo dragon that broke the soundbarrier right above the contest area.

The match would start in 10 minutes. He would have to hurry.

Stuffing his face with the last of the remaining 4 McWyverns he got up and ran to the contest ring.

A loud cheer greeted him as he jumped up in the ring.

Do'omaz wasn't here yet.

"Great, maybe he's still studying his spells or something" GuaRRand laughed.



Time passed. 5 minutes.10 minutes.30 minutes and still no Do'omaz to be seen.

"Hmmmm, i hope i haven't scared him with my last match!?"

"I saw he defeated the wizard B.Vorlon fairly easy"

"i wonder.."

At that point a flash of light and a cloud of smoke appeared just outside the ring.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!"

CRASH

"@%$#@&#%&^*BUUUURP*^#%@&^#%&@

"WTFS, WHERE 'hik' AM I??"

A man scrambled up from the floor and climbed into the ring.

He wore a ragtag ensemble of shirts, cloaks and some weirdlooking sport shoes.

He was bold and had atleast 20 rings through his ears, nose and...errr..

"Right m8, whoz u then?" the man asked.

"Well, i am AlexGeeWiz" GuaRRand said

"And i guess u are..errmm..Do'omaz?"

"Lazt tzime i 'hik' czhecked" the man said.

"You look like crap, are you sure you can go through with this?" GuaRRand asked

"You look like crap.BAH.NAG NAG NAG, letz get on with thiz kthnx, i don't have all day, i need toz get back to thoze luvly ..errr.. well..LETS GET ON WIH IT!!" he shouted

"ok, if you say so" replied GuaRRand.

The gong rang

"Hey, where's the bell gone to?" asked GuaRRand

"CATZCH" he heard Do'omaz yell

A fireball the size of a small village was heading towards GuaRRand.

The crowed yelled and screamed and tried to dodge the huge fireball.

Nearby trees and plants caught fire and even the ring, which was made of magical enhanced steel and iron, was beginning to melt.

GuaRRand stood with mouth wide open and watched the fireball come closer and closer.

"HOLY MOTHER OF ALL THAT IS CHEEZY.WTF.." GuaRRand yelled

He quickly threw up a protective globe of minor invulnerability and hoped for the best.

The fireball contacted with the globe and engulfed it.

Do'omaz moved his hands in the air and the fireball stayed in place, engulfing the globe and GuaRRand.

Do'omaz grinned and started to dance.

"Nevah fawk witzh the Do'omaz, i will screw u evahry time"

After a minute or 2 the fireball disappeared.

Do'omaz stopped dancing, atleast that was the plan, only his feet didn't comply fast enuff and he fell face forward to the canvas.

"Hihihihihihihihi" he grinned.

He pulled himself of the ground (hey, he knew that trick also!!) and stood up.

"LOOK AT WHAT YOU HAVE DONE WITH MY CLOTHES!!" He heard someone yell.

"THEIR ALL BURNED TO A CRISP!!"

Do'omaz looked up and looked GuaRRand straight in the eye.

There wasn't a nose lenght between their two faces.

"RIGHT.THATS IT.NO MORE MISTER NICE WIZARD!!" GuaRRand yelled.

He was really mad, those had been his best Levi's!!

Before Do'omaz could recover from the shock, GuaRRand threw some black stuff on the ground, stomped it and waved his hands in an intricate set of movements.

A puff of smoke rose up between the two and a figure started to appear from the smoke.

Do'omaz, a bit intrigued at the pretty smoke, moved closer to with his face.

A woman appeared from the smoke.

It was a woman in her mid 40'ies Do'omaz guessed.

"Funnyyyy, what's thiz then, do u intend to entertain me with old women??"

GuaRRand looked with blood red eyes and trembling hands at Do'omaz and yelled:

"PH34R MY MOST EVIL SPELL

Do'omaz looked from GuaRRand, to the woman and back to GuaRRand.

"Ur kiddin me right?" he grinned.

"If this is ur most powerful spell, what do u do with ur other spells, bake cookies?"

GuaRRand relaxed a bit and tried to gain back some dignity, which was hard, standing almost nekkid in a crowd filled arena.

The spell was now complete, the woman stood in between the two and gazed at Do'omaz.

"Do'omaz, meet my Mother-in-law, Mom..meet Do'omaz" said GuaRRand

Do'omaz, still very giddy, grinned at the woman and was about to say something when GuaRRand's Mother-in-law exploded.

"WHAT HAVE U DONE WITH MY CHILDS HUSBAND!!, JUST LOOK, HE'S A MESS, YOU HAVE RUINED HIS CLOTHES. DO YOU KNOW WHO MADE THOSE FOR HIM??..WELL DO YOU?, NO OFCOURSE YOU DON'T, YOU WIZARDS ARE ALL THE SAME, NEVER THINKING ABOUT ANYTHING ELSE THEN YOUR OWN REPUTATION. I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I MADE THOSE FOR HIM AND NOW THEIR RUINED. JUST WAIT UNTIL I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!!."

Do'omaz took a step back.

"Errrrmm..m'am, please, lookout, i don't wanna.."

"DON'T WANNA WHAT??, ARE YOU THREATHENING ME NOW??. OH, THIS IS GETTING PERSONAL NOW. THREATHEN ME WILL YOU!!. WELL JUST SEE WHOM THREATHENS WHO. NOBODY THREATHENS ME AND GETS AWAY WITH IT.."

She moved over to Do'omaz, who in turn took another step back, turned around and ran out of the ring, with GuaRRand's Mother-in-law hot on his heels.

"MISS, PLEASE, DON'T." he screamed.

"DON'T YOU MISS ME YOU LOUZY EXCUSE FOR A WIZARD" she yelled back.

The ran out of view.

GuaRRand, now fully calm again, looked at the spectacle and couldn't help but grin.

"To bad i had to use that spell so early in the contest, but he had it coming" he said to himself.

The announcer, who hadn't even had the time to properly introduce the contestants, came into the ring, put a complementary cloak around GuaRRand's shoulders and addressed the crowd.

"AND THE WINNER OF THIS very weird MATCH IS..ALEXGEEWIZ!!!!"

The crowd cheered.

Walking away from the ring, GuaRRand started wondering how Do'omaz could have come up with a fireball that size so quick. Normally that would have taken minutes if not ten's of minutes to prepare.

The only strange thing he could remember was the strange odour that emanated from Do'omaz.

Shrugging GuaRRand walked to the McDonalds. This fighting gave him a huge appetite.