A/N: Soooo I'm probably shooting myself in the foot by writing this one shot because I'll probably have to change it around to fit Never Let You Go and use it, because I have a feeling this isn't going to be what happens on the show BUT as soon as I saw the promo, and then like a creeper, paused on Caleb's face to try to work out where he was (legit had no clue, picked the barn because of my headcanon and he's chilling there a lot) I saw he was crying. And I HAD to write this. I have a feeling the show will show him eavesdropping on Spencer all upset because of him and he'll be all sad and everything, but, while it's not my best work, this is MY version. What I'm really and probably in vain, hoping will happen. I mean considering the synopsis I guess there's a small chance it could be something like this but with all the Spaleb fuckery, I doubt it. This was actually really hard to write because this is TV Caleb and not the Caleb we know and love that I'm writing in Never Let You Go and I don't understand TV show Caleb and his actions so...I tried. OMG I also had a totally weird thought while I was writing this like...what if Spencer kills Hanna and Caleb over heard her talking about it, I don't even know where that thought came from but I've been reading about this theory that Spencer is Uber A and I've been suspicious of her ever since and I was trying to think of what would make Caleb cry! Totally ridiculous so I had to share with you guys! So yeah, I'd be stoked if this is what that's all about and not just Spaleb.

"Spencer?" Caleb called as he entered the barn. No response. He was sure she was here, there where lights on and her car was here…maybe she's asleep. Caleb was trying so hard to make things work with Spencer, and after their conversation the other day, he knew he had a lot of making up to do, which is why he'd returned to the barn. Later than he should have…but he was here. He knew he'd made a mistake as soon as he'd hesitated which had made him hesitate more which had made things…not look good. He was just…he didn't know. He wanted things to work with Spencer didn't he? Besides Hanna was happy with Jordan wasn't she? Why ruin that. He walked towards the bedroom, he could see light coming from the room, as he got closer he could see the door was partially open, he went to push open the door…and stopped. Spencer wasn't the only one in there he could hear….Hanna? What was she doing there? Caleb knew he shouldn't eavesdrop but, he couldn't help himself. I just want to know what's going on…make sure everything's okay. He reasoned with himself. A small part of him whispered that he just wanted to hear Hanna's voice. He shoved it down. He crept closer so he could hear better, Caleb became more and more concerned and the more he listened….the more he froze to the spot. He was barely breathing. He wasn't sure what he'd been expecting them to be talking about, but it wasn't that. He felt his heart starting to break and a tear slowly started to slide down his cheek.

The girls had buried Rollins's body and done their best to hide what had happened, Hanna had been shaken. Badly. The whole kidnapping situation on top of this? It was a miracle Hanna was even standing and not crying in a corner. Spencer hadn't wanted Hanna to be alone, so she'd offered to let Hanna stay with her. She figured Caleb wouldn't make an appearance after their earlier conversation so it should be safe to have a sleepover with Hanna. While Spencer had been getting wine and two glasses, Hanna had been taking a longer than necessary shower. Things where still a bit awkward between them after Spencer had confronted her about her feelings for Caleb. But Hanna was her friend, and there was something very wrong with her. They needed to keep it together, be above suspicion when people realised Rollins was missing. Hanna in her current state? She'd be suspect number one. The girls knew it was an accident but with their history and the accusations they'd thrown at Rollins? Spencer wasn't so sure they police would believe them. Spencer poured two large glasses of wine, figuring they both needed it. She'd just set the bottle down when Hanna emerged from the shower. She was still just wrapped in a towel and it was like she was on auto-pilot.

"Han, I'm so sorry, I forgot, do you want me to get you some clothes?" Hanna's had to be…disposed of. Hanna hadn't even wanted to look at them, let alone wear them. Hanna didn't reply she just stared down at the ground. "Han? Why don't you sit down?" Hanna sat on the bench at the end of Spencer's bed and Spencer nudged a wine glass closer to her. Hanna mechanically picked it up and took a large gulp. Spencer wasn't sure what to do, she needed to get Hanna to talk but Aria, the more sympathetic of the group, had failed, and if Aria had failed, Spencer's chances where slim. But she had to. She had to make sure Hanna could handle this.

"What's going on with you?" She said gently, "This is more than just what happened tonight, I know it is" No response. She decided to be blunt. "Hanna, you need to get it together, you're acting exactly like you just killed someone-"

"That's because I did Spencer" she replied.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Hanna shrugged.

"What do you want me to say Spence? I killed him. It was an accident. But I'm not sorry he's…." Hanna took another swallow of wine.

"Hanna you need to talk about this, about what happened in that barn"

"I can't Spencer. I don't want to" Hanna ground out.

"You may not want to, but you need to. I'm your friend Hanna, no matter what and I'm worried about you"

"I'm fine, I'll get over it" Hanna replied stubbornly.

"No. You're not" Spencer said quietly. Hanna just shrugged again. Spencer sighed, and decided to try a new tack.

"Han…do you think you should tell Jordan what's going on?"

"No"

"But-"

"I said no. He doesn't need to know. He can't know."

"Why not Hanna? You're going to the marry the guy!" Hanna drained her glass and nudged it towards Spencer for a refill. Hanna felt tired all of a sudden. As Spencer refilled her glass, Hanna pulled the ring off her finger and stared at it, she'd thought it would ward off questions about Jordan, but all she was getting was more. Hanna stared at it as she played with it, then watched with casual interest as she let it fall from her fingers. It hit the ground and bounced before rolling to a stop.

"Han?" Spencer started to get up to retrieve but Hanna stopped her.

"Leave it, it's just a stupid ring"

"It's not, it's your engagement ring Hanna" Spencer paused, "and it's really expensive it must have cost like-"

"Forty bucks"

"What?" Hanna sipped her wine.

"It cost me forty bucks" Spencer looked at her confusion.

"You bought it?" Hanna nodded.

"Yup" Spencer opened her mouth, and then closed it, brain rapidly working through the information she had.

"I thought Jordan-"

"He did….but I bought this one" Hanna said gaily.

"You have two? Why?"

"Because I gave him his one back, and I bought this one so no-one would know I ended our engagement" Hanna said with an insincere smile and Spencer just stared. How could she not have realised how very wrong things had gone.

"You ended things?" Hanna dropped all pretence of being casual and looked Spencer dead in the eye.

"How could I not? This A is even freaking crazier than the others. Everywhere I look people are getting hurt because of me, getting dragged in to this mess. After everything he's done for me, everything we shared, I couldn't put him in harms way Spencer. Not anymore. I was freaking….you know" Hanna gestured to herself,"…in that barn, you saw the photo, what do you think Rollins would have done if he'd gotten hold of Jordan? If Jordan had been here to use against me? Anything could have happened to him, and it still could because we know nothing about AD. NOTHING." Hanna went to take a sip of wine but stopped when she saw Spencer's face, "Don't look at me like that Spencer. If you think A wouldn't drag him in to this then you're deluded. No-one is safe. What happened at the…..well I know different now. I'm not going to ruin his life, screw him up, not when I-"

"When you what?"

"Nothing"

"….but why the fake engagement ring?" Hanna opened her mouth but Spencer held up her hand, "I'm so not buying your excuse" Hanna looked at Spencer for a few moments before continuing, quietly.

"I knew you guys would ask a million questions that I didn't want to answer and I didn't need more pity. I just wanted everything to go back to normal…but it never can." Spencer raised an eyebrow.

"And it had nothing to do with Caleb right?" Hanna didn't answer. "Nothing to do with keeping him at arms length to keep him safe, right?" Hanna still didn't answer. "Hanna!"

"I'm not a good person to be around right now, Spencer" she said quietly staring in to her glass. Spencer frowned.

"Han-"

"When I saw him on the road…there was a split second when I wanted to accelerate. I so, so badly wanted to. But I didn't. I braked. But that hesitation….I still hit him anyway. He was dead, and he was right there staring at me and his blood was on me and his blood was everywhere and I couldn't look away. I couldn't. He made Ali think she was crazy, he was bringing her out here to do God knows what and…and….he tortured me Spencer, it was him, in the barn. I know it because I know it had to be a guy because….because….." Hanna had started to cry, her breath sawing in and out of her chest. "And…and I killed him. I didn't mean to, not in the end but I killed him. And I…..I was….I felt bad, but at the same time….I was relieved because I knew he wouldn't be able to hurt me again, he wouldn't be able to get to me. It was like….it was…"

"Revenge. Justice. Both" Spencer finished for her. Hanna nodded wiping her eyes. Spencer reached out a comforting hand to Hanna, but Hanna flinched back and as she did Spencer caught a glimpse of….something.

"Hanna…what is that?" Hanna looked away, "Han….let me see" Spencer said gently. Hanna turned and presented Spencer with her back. Her usually flawless back, that was now covered in big, angry, red burn marks, surrounded by bruising. Spencer's hand flew to her mouth. "Oh my God" she choked out. "He….he did this to you?" Hanna nodded and took a sip of her drink.

"I was in a barn, or something. In the dark. I was in the dark the entire time, but he could always see me. Always knew exactly where I was. I couldn't escape or avoid it. It was like he had, what's the word?"

"Night vision?"

"Probably" Hanna swallowed. "It was never light in there. Even in daylight it was still dark….not completely because of the sun…but the darkness was still there. I could make out things here and there. But whenever it got too light it hurt my eyes, I had to sit in the shadows. There where….there where rats, or…or something, I could hear…something moving. When I woke up, I was all bruised, probably from when he hit me over the head and pulled me down that hole. I don't think he cared if I got a few bruises." Spencer nodded.

"The photo….that's what we assumed had happened" Hanna nodded.

"I don't know what he did when I was….when I….I…when I was unconscious. I just woke up and I didn't know where I was and I was alone and it was dark and I hurt everywhere and I couldn't get out. I was trapped. I cried for help again and gain but no-one came. No-one except him, to take photos or to….to…" Hanna was staring in to her wine glass, lost in the memories. She absent mindedly took a sip. "I would sit, with my back to a wall, because I didn't know if anyone was there, and I didn't want…I wanted to be facing anything…or anyone…I was already vulnerable enough you know, he took my clothes for that creepy doll thing. I was freezing, it was never warm in there and there was this vent thing or something, I don't know it just blew out cold air. It's how I got out, eventually." Hanna shook her head, Spencer didn't dare interrupt her in case she clammed up again, "I didn't get any food or water…" Hanna choked out a laugh, "Well that's not true. I got plenty of water"

"What do you mean?" Spencer asked gently.

"The first time he did it, I didn't know what was happening or what to expect, the other times…I knew it was coming. It was easier to deal with but….I'll always remember that first time. Complete darkness and then I heard the door open, that sound…I always hear that sound….I hoped it was you guys, coming to save me but it wasn't. I couldn't hear him moving, I didn't know where he was, but I heard the door shutting again then there was silence, and I called out to you guys, but it wasn't you…it was him. Then this…this….torrent of freezing cold water hitting me, I couldn't avoid it. He kept spraying and spraying, all over me, I kept swallowing water whenever he'd aim at my face and I couldn't figure out why the entire time. I was already cold enough, did he want me to freeze to death? I didn't even see it coming, I was trying to get the water out of my eyes. I felt it though."

"Felt what?"

"The cattle prod. When he shocked me with it. He did it over and over and over again. I kept asking him to stop, but he just kept doing it over and over. Hitting a different spot each time, arms, neck, legs, stomach. It didn't matter what I said or did or how much I cried or pleaded he kept doing it. I told him over and over I didn't kill Charlotte, and I didn't know who did but he kept going" Spencer glanced down at the burn on Hanna's back and got a very bad feeling.

"A few hours later he was back. He….he spoke, his voice was disguised but it must have been him right? He asked me questions. Asked me again and again about Charlotte and how she died. Why. When. I couldn't answer because I didn't know and I told him I didn't know, told him I'd already told him and then he said…he said he believed me he'd just wanted to check I was telling the truth. Then he started to ask me who killed her. No matter what I said, how many times I asked him to stop he would just repeat the question over and over and over. I think that's when he got really mad, when he started to believe me, because that's when he… he….he…." Hanna took a large gulp of wine.

"He grabbed me, I couldn't fight him off, I doubt I'd have been unable to even in normal circumstances. He didn't look it but he was…really strong. He threw me down to the ground and then he pinned me so I couldn't get away and he….he pressed the rod to my back and he held it there. He held it there and he kept asking the same question over and over and over. Who killed Charlotte? Who killed Charlotte? Who? I kept telling him I didn't know, I didn't have any idea but it wasn't me, I swore it wasn't me but he just cared about who it was. He wouldn't stop, he wouldn't…." Hanna broke down and Spencer carefully put her arms around her friend, and started to murmur soothing words. "I had a dream when I was in there, that you came to see me, and I told you…..told you that I was glad I didn't know who'd killed Charlotte because I would have told if I knew and I would have Spencer….I really would have. If it had been you or Aria or Emily or Caleb or Toby….I would have told him just to make it stop. I don't know what he was going to do next…but I got out. You showed me the way out. And I ran. But I can't stop thinking about what could have happened just as much as what did because there where some….some really scary things in that barn Spence"

Hanna started to shiver and Spencer grabbed the blanket off of her bed and wrapped Hanna in it. The two sat there, Spencer holding Hanna as she cried, as she recounted everything she could remember again, just to make sure it could have only been Rollins. That it couldn't have been anyone else…anyone still out there. Spencer couldn't blame her for wanting to accelerate. Wanting to kill him. But she wasn't sorry Hanna had done it accidentally either, she was sorry for Hanna….for the trauma this would cause her. But she wasn't sorry for him.

Unseen to both of them, Caleb stood on the other side of the door. Tears falling down his face. He'd risked looking around the door in time to see Hanna's back and he'd slowly drawn back, numbly listening to everything she recounted to Spencer. The asshole deserved to die. He did. If he wasn't dead already Caleb would have killed him, right then and there. For doing that to his….to Hanna. The worst part was Hanna would feel bad about it. Feel guilty. It would add to the trauma she'd already experienced. She'd killed her friends husband….granted he was a psychopath but still. All this time….and he'd had no idea. He hadn't fought for her, he'd let her push him away, let her walk away. He should have known better but he'd given up so easily. Fooled himself in to thinking he belonged with Spencer. He didn't know what the hell was wrong with him. The old Caleb would have fought for her, would have insisted on being there for her….looking after her but he'd just walked away. He'd seen right through Hanna's facade and he'd walked away anyway. Right back to Spencer. Hanna had been suffering this entire time, with no-one there for her. She'd been dealing with this alone. He should have been there for her, he should have been taking care of her. Instead he was too busy trying to convince himself that he loved Spencer. He should have protected her, this never should have happened. This was his fault. He could hear Hanna crying on the other side of the door and it shattered his heart more and more. It was gut wrenching. He suspected she hadn't cried since she'd escaped. He stood and listened for a few minutes and then he couldn't take it anymore. Caleb wiped his cheeks, and under his eyes, pulled off his sweater and pushed the door open. Hanna needed him, and he wouldn't let her down this time.