A/N: this may be a bit early, but this is the time of year when u can't just expect everything to go as planned… because it won't. So I'm getting this done early so I don't have to worry about it later. :D
So without further ado, my 1st Christmas/ akatsuki fanfic. :D
Warning: THERE WILL BE CRACK _...
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"No-no-no-no-no-no-NOOO!" Itachi thought almost losing the box of Christmas ornaments he'd been carrying up the stairs.
"You alright there, Itachi?" Kisame asked from behind him.
"Y-yeah. *sigh* I just don't understand why leader-sama is making us celebrate such a pointless, useless, and over all annoyingly bothersome day." Itachi puffed his cheeks out like a blow fish.
"It's not pointless!" Kisame argued. "It's a magical holiday. Where everyone puts aside their differences to—"
"To what; join hands and sing in a whoville chorus? I'd think not."
"Well I mean, I didn't mean THAT, but we could still—"
"Give it up Kisame, You know as well as I do that the akatsuki doesn't have time for such foolish fancies."
"Ya, well you don't have to be a scrooge either…" Kisame mumbled under his breath as they walked into the "Grand room" where there stood a huge1 story undecorated Christmas tree with a large staircase to its right.
"Alright," Pein said, standing closest to the tree, with the rest of the akatsuki in a semicircle in front of him. "Time for the jobs, now who wants to make cookies?" he said rather unenthusiastically.
"ME! OH, ME! PICK ME! ME! PICK ME! OOO!" Tobi frantically jumped around.
"Anyone at all?"
"PICK ME! PICK ME LEADER-SAMA! OOO! OOO! PICK ME!" He jumped on top of and hit other people in the process.
"… *sigh* anyone BESIDES Tobi?"
"LEADER-SAMA! LEADER-SAMA! OOO! OH! PICKKKK MEEEEEEEEEEE!"
"FINE! YOU MAKE THE COOKIES ALRIGHT! JUST… please. For the love of god. Shut. Up." Pein face-palmed exasperatedly.
"! Who makes the cookies? Tobi makes the cookies! Who makes the cookies? TOBEH MAKES THE COOKEHS!" he repeated to himself as he bounced into the kitchen.
"Alright, where were we…. Ah, yes. Sasori, you'll be wrapping the presents. Kisame, you'll do the Christmas feast. Zetsu, you'll be decorating outside. Konan, inside. And the decorator of the tree will bee…" Deidara stepped forward. (And twirled a little bit o.O)
"No need to say another word, my Beautiful art will make sure this Christmas goes out with a ba—"
"Itachi. You can decorate the tree." Deidara blinked his awe-stricken eyes.
"B-B-B-B-B….WHAAAAAA! I SHOULD BE THE ONE DECORATING THE TREE! ME! NOT ITACHI! MY ART IS THE GREATEST OF ALL ARTS! UN!" A vein on the side of Deidara's head looked like it would burst at any moment, as he held Pein by the collar.
"If you want to do ANYTHING, I suggest you let go of me this instant." Deidara hesitantly complied.
"Now, if you wish to work on the tree, you may assist Itachi-san ONLY if he agrees with it. Do you, Itachi?"
"Yeah, whatever." Itachi looked around nonchalantly.
"Then it's settled. Deidara, you will assist Itachi in decorating the tree. You may use anything you can find. Now everyone, get to work. And DON'T break anything." Everyone nodded off and went their own ways. Within 10 minutes of doing so, sounds of objects falling and breaking objects could be heard from every corner of the fortress.
"Alright, so I was thinking we could create small clay ornaments, and on the day after Christmas, we could take the tree outside, and blow it up. For easy clean up." Deidara said, pacing back and forth, tapping his head with his index finger.
"No." Itachi said simply, heading back to the 'basement'. Awestruck for the second time that day, Deidara rushed to Itachi's side.
"And why not? It's a perfectly grand idea!"
"It is." Itachi said, grabbing a few cans of paint and some brushes, and then heading back upstairs.
"If you agree, why can't we do it?"
"Because," he set his items down by the base of the tree, "I'M decorating the tree. Not you. And I already have something in mind. Deidara's face puffed up and turned a brilliant shade of crimson.
"That's just it with you Uchihas; you always think you're better than someone, un." Itachi didn't satisfy him with a response on the subject.
"If you want to make yourself useful, pipe down, grab a brush, and start painting." Deidara cursed under his breath as he picked up a brush and did so.
"Why are we painting a tree anyways?"
"I don't know. I thought it'd look cool, I guess." Deidara laughed a bit, which caused Itachi to smile.
"Well well well; look who's capable of showing emotions besides hatred and disgust!" Deidara laughed a little.
"Shut it, Deidara." Itachi took his brush a whipped it so that a few drops of purple paint landed on the side of Deidara's face. Deidara smiled big with a furrowed brow.
"No you didn't." Itachi leaned back.
"Yet, I have reason to believe that I have." He looked at him through one open eye. With an exhale, the relaxed Uchiha was completely tackled by Deidara. Konan decorated around the pile of wrestling and laughing flesh that moved every which way. When they finally got to a point where they were both tired, Deidara had Itachi pinned down. His body floated dangerously above the Uchiha's without notice, but Itachi would have to admit… he was ok with that. They sat there for a minute without saying a word, just smiling back at each other and breathing deeply.
"So… Is that all the fight… an Uchiha has to offer?" Itachi ignored the comment, but laughed anyways. He looked around the room. Konan decorated pretty decently in such a short time. Looking back towards Deidara, he looked just around the blondes head to see a perfectly perched and bowed mistletoe.
"Heh, hey, Deidara, look up." With a short raised eyebrow he turned his head around as Itachi brought his head closer.
"huh… who's dumb idea was this we're mostly boys her—" Deidara turned around only to meet a certain someone's lips.
It started off slow…
And it began to grow…
And Deidara kissed back as he let his hands play in Itachi's hair, while Itachi's were perfectly happy perched on the blonde's hips.
And Itachi could swear he heard… singing…although, it was probably Leader-sama with a Christmas CD, because before he knew it, Kisame's tone-deaf baritone solo joined the mixing making the boys laugh so hard they had to break the kiss. And they laughed, and they laughed some more. And it was then Itachi thought, that maybe… just maybe, Christmas wasn't so bad after all. And even if only two people knew it, Itachi's stone heart grew 3 sizes that day.
~OWARI~
A/N: so many "how the Grinch stole Christmas" references ,':D so what'd ya think (for a holiday drabble?) xD
