ARGH! I know! I should be updating Wished Away! I'm such a bad authress! But this idea popped into my head and just had to be written down. I will update WA soon. Probably. Enjoy!

I can't help but wonder if things could have been different if we weren't Nation People.

If we didn't have the obligations of our countries on our shoulders.

If we could simply be.

Live our lives without having memories of hundreds or even thousands of years. If I didn't have to be living with heart break for hundreds of years.

Oh yes, I have been in unrequited love for hundreds of years. Not that you would know to just look at me. I always have a grin painted on my face. I am always smiling and laughing and acting as if everything is fine. It isn't. When I see him, I want to hold him and never let go. When he gets angry and calls me a bastard, I want to tell him how much I love him and need him in my life.

But I never do, and never will. He would never speak to me again. I know he does not feel the same way as I do. Not that I've asked him, but I know mi Lovinito well enough to know that he doesn't love me.

I don't know how to live without him though. I tried for a while once. I cut myself off from him. I didn't call him, didn't ask him over and didn't answer the door when he came by pounding on it demanding to know why I was ignoring him.

It was the most excruciating time of my life. It was worse than the times when I was constantly at war. Worse even, than when England defeated my armada.

I couldn't keep it up for long. I broke down and called him again, asking him over for some tomatoes. At first he was angry that I was calling him after all this time, but he agreed and I fell back into the cycle of loving him and living with an ache in my chest whenever I see him. But an ache is better than a hole, isn't it?

Everyone calls me oblivious and stupid, but I see more than they think. For example, I know how much Prussia wants Austria to love him and how Austria wants Prussia to do the same.

I see how England wants to cry every time he sees America with Russia, and I see how Romano will never love me the way I love him. He will never break away from his Catholicism, especially not for me.

So I smile when I see him, I laugh when he calls me names and I die inside every day I can't tell him how I feel. But I paint a smile anyways. As long as he's happy I'm happy.

Right?

Well, this was my first attempt at Spamano and any Hetalia fan fic. Let me know how it was! I might do a second chapter about Romano, but only if anyones interested.