Chat had always been aware that Ladybug was more loved than he was, but this was going a little too far. They'd both been sitting in this bookshop for hours now, and the line for Ladybug's autograph kept growing as Chat Noir's dried up. Sure, the odd girl broke free of the crowd to come over and flirt with him while he signed their posters, but it felt... I don't know... just... wrong.
It wasn't so fun to flirt with these lot. They just flirted back and made him blush. They wanted him. There was no chase. Not like Ladybug. Even now she was giggling at some pun Nathanael had made as she told him how much she loved the drawing he'd done of her. Nathanael turned pink but looked delighted at her approval. He hurried away like he was walking on air. Chat sighed.
He was bored.
He was used to signing autographs as Adrien, he was bored of that too. He looked over at his Ladybug again. Every fan was met with a smile of sheer delight. She had to be exhausted. They'd been at this for hours. If he could he'd help her, but he couldn't. She had to do all this alone. Even so, she still beamed at each person who came to talk to her. She even smiled at Chloe, even though she'd shoved her way to the front of the line and made everyone wait as Sabrina ran off to print the selfie she'd just taken with Ladybug, for her to sign.
Even Adrien rolled his eyes at that. Ladybug though, Ladybug just smiled and apologised to the pair behind Chloe, who had been clearly annoyed at her selfishness. Of course he knew she was trying to prevent an akuma, but he admired her patience none the less.
He turned back to the que in front of him.
It was empty.
All the boys in their school (with the obvious exception of Adrien) were crammed into the line in front of her. Not one even glanced his way.
"Hold my place," Alya said to Nino.
"But I-" Nino began anxiously.
"Please babe?" Alya begged.
Nino couldn't resist that tone. "Be quick!"
She winked at him and promised she would be, before ducking out of the line to join (or create) the one in front of Chat. Chat perked up excitedly. He could always rely on Alya to entertain. Besides, she owed him. He was certain the Lady Blog had something to do with todays popularity.
"Morning Chat Noir," she grinned.
"It is now," Chat purred.
He blushed immediately. Flirting with Alya with Ladybug and Nino right there was just wrong. Alya just giggled.
"You look busy. I won't keep you long," Alya promised.
"Oh I'm super busy. Look at all these adoring fans just dying to get my autograph. I'm so smothered I'm feeling claws-trophobic," Chat sighed sarcastically.
"I can bell," Alya tapped his bell across the table and winked.
Chat smirked. "Punny. You could put more of that on your blog."
"You read my blog?" Alya gasped.
"Everyone reads your blog," Chat said, pointedly.
Alya lowered her voice and asked eagerly, "Do you think she reads my blog?!"
"Yes. I do. Because she does," Chat said, calmly.
"Really?!" Alya squealed.
She looked over at Ladybug like she was nothing but a daisy and Ladybug was the sun. Chat's face fell. Alya wasn't exactly his best friend, and yet he felt she could show a little more decorum for him. Especially when getting his autograph. He cleared his throat, pointedly.
"Want this to Alya or to eBay?" He asked.
"Oh, sorry, you're great too, but she's just..." Alya sighed dreamily, gazing at Ladybug like she had a crush on her.
Ladybug happened to glance over. Alya waved eagerly. Ladybug chuckled and waved back. Chat raised an eyebrow. Looks like he has competition. He sighed her poster with a flourish and slid it back across the table.
you're im-paw-sible Alya!
Alya smirked. "I guess I am a little! Thanks Chat."
She didn't even wait to hear him say you're welcome, before hurrying back to Nino as the line edged forwards. Chat blew out a long breath of air and reached for a piece of paper. He wrote a note with a smirk and folded it into a paper plane. Ladybug didn't see it swoop through the air until it hit her in the forehead.
"Ow!"
"Oops, sorry bugaboo!"
"Chat, quit messing around and calling me Bugaboo, I'm busy!"
"But-"
"Pretend a cat got your tongue and shhh! I'm sorry about him, he missed his cat nap and he's a little crabby."
She went back to ignoring him for her fans as he whined and grumbled under his breath, "I'm not crabby. I've got claws not pincers!"
Chat frowned as Ladybug swept aside his paper plane. He accepted that she was busy, but he was her partner! She couldn't just sweep him aside like this! He wouldn't let her. He twirled his pen like a mini baton and wrote another note. This one landed in front of her, knocking her pen and making her autograph jog. She glared at him.
"Quit it kitty!" She hissed.
"C'mon bugaboo, help meow-t I'm bored!" Chat whined.
"You know what chat?! Fine!" Ladybug huffed.
She slammed her hands on the table in front of her and climbed up onto the chair so everyone in the shop could see her. Chat's mouth flapped like a fish as he tried to figure out what she was up to.
"Ladies and gentlemen-" she began calling loud enough to hush the crowd.
"What are you doing?" Chat hissed urgently.
"Ladies and gentlemen, I'm so sorry it's taking so long to get to each of you, but my partner Chat is bored and annoying me, which is making things take so much longer. Help me to help you! Half of you move into his line, and things will speed up!" Ladybug called.
"Are you kitten me?" He asked in the most dumbfounded voice.
Ladybug ignored him to usher the crowds towards him. People were begrudging at first, but they figured that they'd only have to wait half as long to get Chat's signature, and then half as long again to get Ladybug's. That seemed fair. They moved slowly to Chat's line and piled in front of him, ready to wait. Ladybug sat back on her seat and smiled sweetly at him.
"Happy meow?" She purred.
"I want to be mad but you make my tail tingle when you make puns like that," he purred back.
"Get to work kitty," she winked.
Chat chuckled as he turned back to the long line waiting before him. The first person seemed bored and impatient. Chat knew the feeling.
"Don't worry, I'm bored too," he promised. He put the pen into his mouth to yank the lid off with his teeth. "Name?"
After a while the line in front of Chat had died down again, and the line in front of Ladybug was growing. Chat yawned pointedly. He stretched out his arms and tossed a piece of paper in the air again. It was the third ball he'd made. He kept getting too boisterous and hitting it away. Ladybug pointed at him with the end of the pen.
"If that hits me there'll be a lethal akuma heading your way," she threatened.
"You couldn't hurt me, my lady. I'm purr-escious to you," He purred.
She rolled her eyes but smiled away. Now that half the people were wandering over to keep Chat busy, Ladybug had time to focus on the boy in front of her. Max.
"I have powers too you know Ladybug, I have a super mind-" Max began to ramble.
Marinette was used to max rambling and knew just how to avoid it by cutting him off. "Yes, I remember the robot. He was awesome. You're very good."
"Thank you, but that was nothing-" Max began.
"Hey!" Markov's robotic voice cried from his bag.
"Not nothing, I didn't mean nothing, sorry Markov," Max apologised.
"You're forgiven," Markov beeped happily.
"All I meant was that Markov - excellent as he is - is not as awesome as this," Max said.
He placed on the next in front of Ladybug, and small round device, sort of like a bracelet with a black box on top. Ladybug lifted it and examined it curiously.
"Interesting. What is it?" She asked.
"I call it the bug snapper! It shrinks people down to the size of a ladybug! Approximately I mean, because obviously ladybugs - like people - come in all sizes, but I made sure they follow the average size of ladybugs. Much easier to handle," Max beamed proudly and pushed his glasses further up his nose.
"Fascinating. Um, what's it for?" She asked.
"Well its only a prototype so I thought you could use it and give me some feedback on how to make it work better," he said.
She raised an eyebrow. "You want me to shrink people?"
"Only when it'll make things easier. Tiny things are easier to trap," Max said.
"And to lose," Ladybug pointed out.
Max's shoulders sagged as if he hadn't thought of that before. "Will you try it anyway? Please?"
"How can I say no to a fan that's just trying to help? Thank you max," Ladybug said.
"Excellent!" Max beamed.
Ladybug laid the bracelet on the desk carefully as Max walked away. She set it to one side to make sure that no trouble would come from it. It seemed pretty pointless to her, since it'd make it harder to capture an akumatized object, and easier to lose the akuma, but she'd write a nice review pointing out all the good she could find in it. Then another paper ball bounced off of her head.
"CHAT NOIR WILL YOU STOP?!" She huffed.
"How comes people bring you jewellery and not me?" He teased.
"You can bring me jewellery if you want," she shrugged.
"Would you wear it?" Chat bounced his eyebrows suggestively.
"If I liked it," she nodded.
"If I gave you a ring would you wear it?" Chat purred.
"Course I would," she smiled.
"An engagement-"
"On my middle finger."
Chat straightened up and tried not to smirk at her teasing him. "Cold Ladybug."
"Don't be silly. I hate the cold," she smirked.
She turned back to the line of people waiting, and neither of them noticed the door open again. It was constantly opening and shutting and letting in the cold, which was why Ladybug had a space heater behind her. Chat had to just suffer. This time a group of boys entered.
"God look at this line! Its gonna take hours!" One boy groaned.
"We could have come earlier if someone didn't take forever to get ready!" Another said, pointedly.
"I had to look good for the selfies," the first countered.
"With a beak like that you'll never look good," another smirked.
The smallest and nervous looking one say, "If you guys wanna go, I can-"
But one of the arguing boys shook his head and cuffed his shoulder. "Don't be dumb Marc, if you're meeting a hero, we're all meeting a hero!"
"Even though you should never meet your heroes," the first muttered.
"You're basing that off the one time you met Mar-"
"You never say that name. Never. No."
While the others laughed, Marc fiddled with the rolled-up poster in his hands nervously. He was shoved forward by one of the others, so he stumbled towards Chat Noir.
"Lets just get this over with!"
Chat Noir didn't notice the boys heading his way. He leaned across his desk and picked up the bracelet that Max had left on her desk. He was fiddling with it, in a kind of bored entertainment, when the boys reached the desk. He hardly even glanced at them. His mind was back at home in his bedroom getting a cat nap before his photoshoot tonight.
The fact he was missing out on the chance to sleep because of this, to watch Ladybug flaunt her fans in front of him, was deeply irritating. It wasn't fair as far as he was concerned. Yes he knew Ladybug was more popular than him, given that she actually fixes everything and stood up to Hawkmoth and everything, but there wouldn't even be a Ladybug if he wasn't there to coach her in the first place.
He wasn't usually jealous, less fans meant he could easily escape crowds that Adrien couldn't, but he was a hero too. With her long line and him entertaining himself by pre-signing cards to save time, he felt more and more like a sidekick.
"C-chat Noir?" Marc stammered.
"That's my name too, what a coincidence!" Chat chuckled.
Marc gulped. His palms were getting sweaty. Chat glanced past the bracelet for a moment to look at the boys gathered around his desk.
"Ladybugs line starts there," he said, pointing a claw back towards the door.
He yawned as the boys shared anxious looks again. Marc was already turning pink.
"Um, no, I wanted to um... get your um... get your autograph," Marc stammered.
"Mine? Oh," Chat said. He groaned as he stretched to reach for the pre-signed cards and dragged one forward. "What's your name?"
"Marc," He said.
Chat wrote his name above the signature and threw it carelessly across the table. Marc leapt to get it. His friends frowned. They understood he had to he tired, he must have been here a long time now, but still. This was no way to treat his biggest fan.
"I d-drew this painting-"
"Bugaboo? Are you nearly done? It's getting late and I-"
"Have fans trying to talk to you! Pay attention kitty! You could cause an akuma the way you're going!"
"Sorry kid, go on, what do you want, a selfie? Come on, squeeze in,"
The boys squeezed together and Chat held the phone up to fit them in. Marc looked at the selfie, but it came out blurry, so they wanted to try again. That's when Ladybug noticed what Chat was fiddling with.
"Chat! That's my bug snatcher!" She huffed.
"Your what?" Chat frowned.
"Give it here!" She reached out to snatch it back.
In the ensuing momentary struggle a button got pressed. There was no flash or vibration or sound like you might expect. There was just a tingling sensation that started in the boy's fingers and edged down to take over their whole bodies like pins and needles. Suddenly everything around them was huge, and they were feeling very uneven. Suddenly having six legs and a pair of wings will do that to you.
"Guys? Guys what the hell just happened?"
"Victor?!"
"Marc?!"
"You're a ladybug!"
"you're a ladybug too!"
"Am I a ladybug?!"
"We're all ladybugs! What the hell?!"
"Guys, look. Chat Noir's massive..."
"So his nose..."
"He needs to get rid of that bogey."
The others chirped in agreement. When Ladybug finished scolding him, Chat looked around in confusion. The boys had vanished and left the signed cards behind.
"Weird. I guess they had places to be," Chat shrugged.
The gang of ladybugs on his desk went unnoticed as he went back to fiddling with the pen he'd been given.
"Guys, we're gonna have to get their attention to try and get them to turn us back into us. Marc, Victor, take Chat Noir. Luke, you and I can try ladybug, everybody ready?"
"Ready!"
And yet none of them went anywhere. Not for lack of trying though. All of them were trying very hard to lift themselves off the ground with their glistening wings, but they couldn't quite manage it. Not that they stopped trying. Meanwhile Chat was yawning again. He checked his watch. If he left now he could squeeze in a nap before the shoot. He glanced over at Ladybug. She hid a yawn behind her hand and he felt a sting of guilt. She was so busy, she had to he exhausted too, and he wasn't being much help. He leaned back across the desks.
"Listen... Im fe-line pretty ex-paw-ted so I think I'm gonna cat-nip out early, I don't want you to think I'm abandoning mew, but I'm needed on the catwalk," he explained.
He was pretty proud of that one because not only was it a pun but in many ways, it was true. Ladybug didn't even glance back at him as she signed the next poster.
"Good, you've been bugging me all day!" She huffed.
It hurt a little, but he forced a smile, "My tail still tingles!"
A little flying bug zoomed past his head and he didn't register it. When it came zooming back, he batted it away thoughtlessly. Ladybug leaned over the next, back towards Chat.
"Go home Chat. You clearly don't wanna be here, just go. I'll apologise to your fans for you," Ladybug said, bluntly.
Chat scoffed scornfully. "Oh yeah, apologise to all four of them, these ladybugs are the only things paying any attention to me in an hour! Have I ever told you how much I hate annoying flying insects like this?"
He batted the air as the bugs buzzed around him again in irritation but they wouldn't let up. He huffed at their relentlessness.
"Maybe fix your personal hygiene then-" Ladybug waved at the girl walking away, feeling a little bad she hadn't had time to talk to her properly, "bye, thanks for coming!"
"Its called musk," Chat said, smugly.
"Soap'll get rid of it," Ladybug teased.
"If you're really worried about my hygiene you could join me in the shower," Chat purred.
"I thought cats didn't like water," She teased.
"I like anything you're in," He purred.
Ladybug rolled her eyes and looked up at the boy in front of her desk. "You see what I have to put up with?"
The fan glanced back at Chat as bugs descended and he tried desperately to bat them away, "Stupid bugs!"
A couple buzzed past Ladybug's eye, dangerously close. She cried, "Hey! Now you're chasing them over here!"
That was the final straw he leapt to his feet, eager for a game of chase. "Don't worry bugaboo, I'm a killer ex-purr-minator! I'll deal with this and then I'm out the door!"
"My hero," Ladybug rolled her eyes.
Chat rolled up a spare poster tight as he could and held it up like a baton. Ladybug rolled her eyes and wafted her hand to wave another bug away. The bug-boys were beginning to wonder if they could ever get the attention of these heroes, and even if they could, how were they going to communicate with them?
"here, buggy, buggy, buggy! Come to kitty, no one's going to hurt you," He purred.
"Hey, I have an idea! Help me get this pen!" marc called to his fellow bug-boys.
"little busy right now!" came the response as his friends tried to fly away from Chat Noir's reach.
Marc was on his own. He landed on the desk again (bumpily though. he didn't think he'd ever get used to having six legs and hoped he wouldn't have to) and charged right at the pen standing upright on the desk.
"MARC LOOK OUT!"
The warning came just in time for Marc to leap aside, and Chat's weapon to slam onto the desk where he had just been. Marc took to the air for safety.
"DIDN'T I SAY NEVER MEET YOUR HEROES?! IT ALWAYS ENDS BADLY!"
"SHUT IT LUKE!"
"Guys, if I can get to the ink in that pen, I can write a message, just give me a wing!"
"NOW ISNT THE TIME FOR PUNS MARC!"
"Come on little bug, I'm not going to hurt you! I couldn't Paw-sibly hurt a fur-end like that," Chat purred, viciously.
He swiped through the air with his paper baton as two of the ladybugs dashed away, heading straight for the pen on the desk. Marc headbutted it while Luke tried desperately to wriggle the lid off of the end. It wasn't working! He didn't have the fingers to do it with, and it dwarfed him! it he pulled it towards him too far, it would roll and crush him dead.
"Stay there bug. That's it. nice bug. Stay still for an ex-purr-t ex-purr-minator," Chat said, softly, as he advanced.
Victor went crashing down towards Ladybug's hand, exhausted by the effort it took to fly, especially to fly away from Chat Noir's reach. Ladybug's eyes widened at the cute little ladybug as it landed on her finger.
"Hello little lady," she chuckled.
Victor rolled off of her hand, exhausted, and onto the desk like he'd been shot. Fearful for his friend, Jean swept down to land beside him as he laid on his back. Ladybug raised an eyebrow, fascinated by their actions. Meanwhile Chat Noir was wriggling himself into position, preparing himself to lash out and get both bugs with one poster. He was, after all, a perfectly designed hunter, like all cats were. Chasing bugs was like chasing yarn to him. Just more fun. Ladybug jumped as Chat thumped the poster against the desk, sending both ladybugs flying into the air to the safety of her desk. She scowled at Chat.
"Hey don't kill them they're ladybugs!" she cried.
Chat's arm holding the baton drooped. "Are you telling me tall tails?"
"Chat they're ladybugs! Look!" she gestured to her desk.
The last too ladybugs joined their friends as Chat leaned over Ladybug's shoulder to see them. his eyebrows rose. "Huh. I didn't spot that."
Ladybug rolled her eyes. she reached for the pen to her left to sign the next item, ready to apologise to the waiting fan, but she paused. There was a ladybug on the nib of her permanent marker. The bug then hovered down to the spare paper to one side and began to hurry across the page, like it was writing something. Ladybug glanced at the bracelet, and then at Chat, and then back at the four little bugs.
"Chat… those boys that came to see you, there were four of them, right?" She said, slowly.
"um, I dunno, I didn't think to count," Chat shrugged, "why?"
"when you were playing with my bracelet max gave me, they vanished, yeah?" she continued, feeling her heart beat harder.
"Uh, I guess so. Why? What's up?" Chat asked.
"Max's bracelet is supposed to make people ladybug sized! I think you hit them by accident, and it didn't turn them ladybug sized, it turned them into ladybugs!" Ladybug said, urgently.
Chat scoffed in disbelief. "are you kitten me? fur real?"
Ladybug reached for the paper that Marc was desperately running across. She gently tipped him into her hand, where he would be safe, and help the paper up to Chat Noir. Written in small, fading ink, was the word "help". Chat gulped. That was pretty damming evidence.
"You turned your fans into bugs kitty, and then tried to cataclysm them!" Ladybug said, firmly.
Chat looked guilt stricken but tried to laugh it off with a half-hearted pun. "cat-astrophe?"
Ladybug rolled her eyes. she apologised again to the last few people waiting in the line around them. it was getting late, and she knew they were probably tired and impatient about having to wait even longer for their autograph, but this was important.
"Chat will you lend me a paw?" she asked.
"Anything for you my lady," Chat promised.
Ladybug gently scooped up each of the bug-boys and placed them in Chat's cupped hands. They crowded together in his palm, deadly aware of the cataclysmic powers he was yet to show off today.
"Very paw-rry about this mix-up boys," He apologised, "I didn't mean to bug you so bad."
"Less puns, more apologies," Ladybug said, firmly.
Chat's ears flattened against his head sheepishly. He muttered, softly, "sorry boys…"
"better," Ladybug said.
Her focus wasn't so much on Chat and the bugs, as the bracelet that Max had given her. there was a button on top to turn people into ladybugs, which was what had been pressed in the first place, but there was another button, a smaller button, on the edge. Ladybug assumed this would fix all of the problems, but when she pressed it, nothing happened. She hummed thoughtfully.
"maybe it's just an on-off switch," Chat suggested.
"Well I'll make a note of that in my review," Ladybug grumbled. She dropped it back onto the desk with a sigh. "How many people are left wanting autographs?"
"five," Chat said, being careful to count everyone.
Ladybug nodded thoughtfully. The only way to fix this was with a lucky charm, which would give her five minutes to get away before anyone saw her. This seemed like a perfect opportunity for her to make an escape and drop the cat in it, since he hadn't been pulling his weight today anyway. she gathered up the last of the fans and signed their things while apologising for not having more time to talk to them, and then turned her attention to Chat Noir.
"Lucky charm!" she cried.
It took a moment or two for the pink and white lights to kick into action but they twirled around him and the ladybugs in his hands, getting ready to transform them back into people. Chat realised he was being punished when the five ladybugs began to grow, and gain weight, and his knees buckled. He was trying to hold up four boys who weighed more together than he had ever tried to hold before, and he didn't have a good grip on them. his knees buckled first, and then he and all four boys went crashing to the floor. Ladybug giggled as the lights died away. She held out a hand to Marc, to help him up. he reached back to reveal his hands were covered in permanent marker.
"Smart idea, writing a note like that. you're a smart kid. Sorry kitty didn't see that," she smiled.
"T-thanks Ladybug! Thank you for saving us too. I hope you don't mind, but even everything he put us though… Chat Noir is still my hero," Marc shrugged, sheepishly.
"REALLY?!" his friends cried in protest.
Chat Noir scowled at them, but when he met his lady's scolding glare, he shrunk back into himself, and set his mind against voicing his objections to their protests.
"Really! He's cocky and clumsy, and clearly doesn't pay enough attention, but he's loyal. He's kind too. And he tries, he really tries. Even though his power is to destroy everything he touches, he finds a way to make destruction useful. It kinda tells me that, no matter how much I mess up, there's always a way to make things better, y'know?" Marc shrugged again. his blush was growing deeper with each sentence.
Ladybug squeezed his shoulder gently. "I do. I'll let you into a little secret, he's my hero too."
Chat's ears perked up as he grinned at her, pushing himself to his feet, "I am?"
"Sure. despite how much you bug me, you're my kitty. You're always there when I need you, and when I don't, and you never let me down. Besides, there'd be no ladybug without Chat Noir," she smiled.
Chat purred playfully, "D'you want my autograph?"
She smirked and shook her head, trying not to roll her eyes again because it was beginning to hurt slightly. the boys didn't seem as impressed at how easily he moved on.
"I'll settle for you helping tidy up here, and then taking these boys home. I'd help but-" she gestured to her earring as it beeped to let her know she had to go.
"You're right Ladybug. I'm sorry for my behaviour today. It wasn't acceptable," Chat said seriously.
"Tell bug-boy here. he's the one who admires you. me, I tolerate you," Ladybug smirked.
"You're cruel my lady," he said, with a smile.
"only when you deserve it. now I really gotta go, I'll see you around kitty," she said as her miraculous beeped again. she grabbed the bracelet from the desk and hurried towards the exit.
"Bye bugaboo," Chat called after her.
She rolled her eyes at the nickname, but the door shut behind her too quickly to scold him for it. she latched her yo-yo around a lamppost and pulled herself up onto the rooftops to hurry home as quickly as she could. After all, she had a very important review to write.
