Daniel's Day

Disclaimer: I don't own or have a share in the profits from these characters or the franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

0500 Hours, VIP Quarters of Daniel and Vala, City of Atlantis, Pegasus Galaxy

"What the hell?" Daniel said grumpily as he heard his communications ear piece click on the side table next to the bed he and Vala were sharing. He looked at the clock he had brought and it said 0500 hours.

"What??" he hissed testily as he acknowledged the signal. He shot a loathing peek at Vala who was laid out in a position a professional contortionist would find painful, yet she was blissfully unaware of anything as she slept on with her eye shades keeping out any light. No doubt she would wake up completely refreshed and wanting to take on the world, leading to nothing but trouble for him in the process. He winced as he remembered Sam's punishment the day before. It just figures that he finally gets here with time enough to actually explore his dream and she calls a halt to it for a week.

"Rise and shine, Space Monkey," came the annoying response of one Jack O'Neill.

"Do you have any idea what time it is, Jack?" Daniel drawled as he let himself fall back into the bed and out an arm over his eyes.

"Time to get up and get me out of here," Jack said firmly. "You're pulling wheelchair duty this morning."

"At 0500?" Daniel asked in a very frustrated voice. He was tired, damn it. Vala had felt 'frisky' as she called it and had totally wiped him out by the end of their 'activities.' He'd been asleep for all of three hours.

"I'm bored and awake, Danny Boy," Jack said sarcastically. "You got me into this mess, so I figure that you can help me out for a bit today. I've got plans."

"Can't Sam push you around in the wheelchair?" Daniel complained. "She is your fiance, after all."

"She's too busy," Jack said after a momentary pause.

Daniel picked up on it instantly. "You pissed her off, didn't you," Daniel stated firmly.

"No," Jack said instantly. "Well maybe," he admitted. "It wasn't my fault that someone left a donut next to the bed and it was just begging to be ate."

Daniel laughed. "She caught you wolfing it down," he surmised.

"Yeah," Jack admitted.

"All the more reason you should be having her wheel you around. You can apologize and beg for forgiveness for deviating from 'The Plan,'" Daniel replied.

"Hello??" Jack said loudly. "Have you been listening to me the last week or so when I let it be known quite clearly that I so very want to get laid again in this lifetime? Right now Jack Jr. is traumatized from the horrific experience of having to listen to McKay for four hours last night. Then when Carter comes by to cuddle, the poor guy couldn't even raise a half salute for the love of it's life, let alone the whole enchilada. To top it off even foreplay is ruined since even the slightest damn move of my lower body is rather painful. Now who do you think I hold responsible for all that humiliation?"

Daniel sighed. "That is way too much information, Jack," he said with a shudder. The absolute last thing he ever wanted to think about was Jack's sex life, or rather his lack of one at the moment. "I still think it should be someone else to wheel you around."

"You have two choices, Space Monkey," Jack said in his gruff commanding officer voice. "Option one is to get your ass down here and wheel me around this morning. If you don't like option one-"

"I don't," Daniel interjected instantly.

"Then there's option two which means I let slip to Carter that my order to make her wear that totally hot dress when we were guests of the Shavadai was based solely on your comment that field anthropologists dressed in native garb all the time," Jack stated smugly.

Daniel shot straight up into a sitting position. "What??" he practically shouted in a tone full of dread. To this day mention of the Shavadai and what Sam had to wear was a strictly forbidden topic of conversation, especially for Jack. Sam's look of pure lethal intent whenever it was brought up years ago in the aftermath was enough to make them all swear to silence on the issue. If Sam found out that it was his comment that led to her personal 'humiliation and near rape' as she put it when in a good mood, then he'd be lucky if he left Atlantis with only no exploration as his punishment. "You wouldn't," he said with a certain amount of trepidation.

"Try me," Jack said without a trace of good humor in his voice.

Daniel caved. "Twenty minutes?" he asked.

"I'll be counting the minutes, Space Monkey," Jack said as he clicked off the comm.

Daniel got out of bed and walked to the bathroom grumbling. Here he was in Atlantis, the ultimate example of Ancient technology and development, and he was stuck wheeling Jack around in a wheelchair. "The Gods hate me," he muttered as he stepped into a very cold shower which was his normal way of waking up rapidly. He'd hit the coffee as soon as he could once he had Jack in tow, or rather Jack had him in tow. Jack always seemed to win, the lucky bastard.

Once he dressed in his blue BDU's, he gave a last wistful look at his bed and Vala, then headed out the door. He could only hope that he could avoid seeing Sam until things had cooled down, and he was perhaps on a break from wheeling Jack around. Daniel was motivated by self-preservation and as such, he was not interested in putting himself between Sam on the one side and Jack on the other. He'd be dead before he knew what hit him. Damn control panel! Why would anyone put it there where he could bump it and get Jack injured? He definitely had bad Karma.