I aimlessly stared at the clock mocking me, wishing time would speed up. The ticking seemed to echo throughout the room lingering there. I averted my eyes from the clock glancing to my left where the desk that had been empty for months was now occupied. I felt his eyes, once again falling upon me. Would he just stop looking at me? I get that he had been gone for the begging of the school year, but jeez I didn't change that much from the summer. Nearly not as much as he did and he had in tremendous ways. When I first saw him enter the room that day I couldn't recognize him. He had gotten extremely taller, muscular, and however weird it seemed he almost looked beautiful. How could anyone like him look beautiful? I'm seeing things. That's all.

The bell finally rang I slung on my coat, and pressed my hat with the pom-pom on the top over my head. I flung my book bag over my shoulder, retreating from the class as fast as I could. I headed down the hall weaving myself through the mess of people finding my friend, Gaia. It wasn't all that hard seeing as she was the only one to attend La Push High that wasn't Quileute. Her mother had remarried and moved here, seeing as her step-father was Quileute is the only way she got in. Sure we were no private school, but might as well be. I guess you could say La Push High was different than most schools.

Her long light red hair falling in curls down her back, her sage green eyes finding my face. She pulled my over from the crowd in the pushing us near the lockers.

"Sloan, calm down what's wrong? Why are you in such a rush?" She asked scanning my face, reading it.

"I'll explain while we walk. There are too many suspicious ears listing." I said trying to make my way out the doors. We walked back in the crowd of people heading out the glass doors. We stepped into the frigid winter cold. Snow began falling from the sky placing itself lightly against our skin.

"So… are you going to tell me?" She asked as soon as we were farther away from the school, walking down the path we only knew about.

"It's him. He's back." I said still in disbelief.

"No way?"

"Yes. I can't believe it. Don't you remember how he acted during the summer?"

"Yeah, that was horrible; I definitely remember how he acted. That ass."

"Gaia!" I exclaimed I seldom ever herd her curse, but she had a very valid point.

"What?"

"So guess how I know. He's in my English class. Oh and he has to sit next to me. Stupid last name of mine."

"And…" She gestured for me to continue, she definitely knew I wasn't done yet.

"Oh right. He kept starring at me the whole period. The whole period Gaia! It was the weirdest thing and he acted as if nothing happened."

"That ass." I laughed she soon joined in with me. I gave her a high five to let her know my pleasure with her comment.

The wind soon picked up, blowing the fresh snow flurries into my face, the hairs on my neck began to rise.

"It's so freaking cold out." I exclaimed.

"Yeah it's never this cold in November. Maybe it's because he's returned." I felt a smile creep upon my face. We had made it off of our trail and now walking along the edge of the highway, heading towards our houses. I sighed realizing we still had a long way to walk in the cold.

I heard the motor of a truck slow down, staying along side of us. The window slowly rolled down. I cocked my head to the left looking into the window of the red truck, seeing who it was. Him.

"Need a lift, Sloan, Gaia?" He asked. Why in the world would he be acting nice? He couldn't possibly hold up this façade for long.

"No were fine." Gaia said coldly. We continued to walk starring straight ahead.

He kept following right along side us.

"Don't you have some where else to be a jerk at?" Gaia asked, always there to stand up for me. I kept quiet.

"Hurtful. Come on its cold out here, much warmer in this truck. And you still have a couple of miles to walk back. What do you say?"

"We'll manage. Now if you don't mind, why don't you go stalk someone else where?"

He swiftly pulled the truck in front of us, coming to a stop. I stopped dead in my tracks.

"What the hell?" Gaia exclaimed. "Move your truck."

"Get in where its warm and I will." I could see Gaia about to go into ultimate bitch mode. I pressed my hand on her shoulder, glancing into her eyes giving her a look as to say 'hey free ride from the cold.'

I opened the door the warm air hitting me immediately. It felt so inviting. I slid in beside him, not that I wanted to at all, but if Gaia had it wouldn't have turned out so well. She was a fireball when set off, and trust me you didn't want to press her wrong buttons. She hopped in throwing her bag at the floorboard.

I was jammed up next to his new massive stature crowding most of the truck, Gaia pressed against me. I felt warmth radiating from his body, and if I didn't abhor him it would've been kind of nice. And if, which would never happen again, I still liked him it would've been a great excuse to cuddle against him.

Whoa, Sloan, stop thinking like that he's an ass, a big ass. I told my self, why in the world would I be thinking such things like that. Sure I might have before the last month of the summer, but defiantly not now.

We reached Gaia's house, she hurriedly left the truck. Before shutting the door she looked into my eyes.

"Call me later will you?" I advised more than asked. My eyes hinting at my uneasiness.

"Yeah I will catch you later, girl. Thanks." She replied knowing of my nervousness she reluctantly left me in the car with him. I slid towards the door shutting it as I did so. I pressed my body as close as I could to the door, seeming as if I pressed hard enough I would fall through the door.

"Did I do something to upset you?" He asked. That dimwit did he not know what he did. How could he forget? I guess he was just that heartless.

"You know what you did." I said duly. I had no intent of discussing it and tried to stay quiet.

"Well I don't, but I'm sorry for doing what I did." I didn't reply. "Was it that bad?" Still I continued to be quiet and starred at the snow falling onto the earth from the window. "Sloan," he pressed his hand upon my shoulder. I turned my head looking at him then glancing at his had. A silent notion of mine, for get your hand off of me. "Look whatever I did I'm sorry." It was sincere like he meant it, but I would never fall for his lie. The car stopped in front of my house. I reached for the door handle. "Really I am." I couldn't take his lie anymore I jolted from the car and headed swiftly for the door. I ran up the stairs eager to call Gaia, completely ignoring my mom saying something manliness to me. I pulled my phone out of my bag and quickly dialed her number I had memorized by heart. I closed my door, even though it was irrelevant my parents wouldn't listen to the conversation.

"What is it?" She answered eager to know what had happened with him and me.

"Meet me at the cottage and I'll explain everything." I answered knowing she would.

"Ok I'll meet you there." She hung up the phone.

The cottage was hidden in the woods only a place that Gaia and I knew about. We would go and get away from out families there. Mine who seemed to never care what I was doing or noticed me. Gaia's overruling step-father who was awkward about her. A place where we could escape, and be with each other as sisters. I always considered Gaia as my sister seeing as she was my closest friend- well only one for that matter- we shared everything, no secrets between us.

One day we had been walking in the forest when we stumbled upon the cottage, we hand had been that close then, but it brought us together instantly. We ventured in pondering what we had found. We couldn't fathom how the small cottage had still held up on its own. It looked almost as if it had waited for us for someone to find it. We had decided it was from original settlers around La Push that were probably run out sooner or later by my tribe. Even though we had been a very peaceful clan it made no sense to find it on our property without reasoning such as that.

When finding the cottage it was disheveled and fragile. As soon as we made our pact together we fixed up the cottage. My parents not paying attention enough to know what they were giving me money for helped increasingly. Gaia could also ask her mother for lunch money every day while in turn she carried a lunch with her to school. Another trait I loved about her, her amazing cleverness. It never seemed to fail her.

Our cottage had come along over the years, sure it wasn't much but it was ours. All Gaia's and mine. I loved that we had a place to get away from the world, to think, to escape, to live.

I slid my hat back upon my head heading out towards the back door that led unto the woods. I never bothered with telling my parents where I was going, they were too engrossed in their own lives to care. It always felt to me, which was probably true, that I was unplanned that 'oops' I just happened. Same with Gaia her step-father added an immense load of rules on her as soon as her mother married him. So it was her way of retaliating, another thing she did well. I had to lover her for it. I was too good to retaliate against my parents even though they would know. They're so oblivious, I could be screwing every guy in La Push High, but they'd never know or care. They only played mom and dad, if those names should be given to them, when it was absolutely mandatory. They acted as if they were a young couple in their prime doing anything and everything they wanted.

The frigid wind bit at my cheeks causing shivers to be sent down my back. I inhaled deeply as I went into the woods, so many memories with Gaia flowing back. Then without thinking what had happened in the woods with him fled my mind. I immediately pushed it out of my mind not wanting to remember it.

I reached the cottage deeply hidden throughout the trees. I slipped in finding Gaia lighting some lanterns.

"Hey girlie." I exclaimed.

"Hey so tell me. What happened after I left?" She asked still antsy to know.

"Let's get comfortable and then get ready for your ears to be flooded with all my information." I slipped off my boots, jacket and hat, that made my hair fly away filled with static. In my socked feet I ran into the small part of the cottage that held all of our food that never would hold for a while. I grabbed a couple of waters, and snack food. I pitched a water bottle to Gaia, who of course caught my horrible throw. I plopped down by Gaia on the couch that we had racked up enough money to buy. I drug a blanket across us and snuggled next to my best friend.

"So…" She pressed on.

"Ok, ok. After you left I slid as close to the door as I could he asked if he did something to upset me. Well no freaking duh. And I was like you know what you did. Then he has the balls to say he's sorry, sorry Gaia! I didn't say anything and all he did was ask if it was that bad and I continued to sit there then he placed his hand on my shoulder. Well you know how I am with people touching me." She nodded. "Then he said he was sorry that he really was. As if I'm going to believe that crap. It was so weird like he was sincere."

"Whoa Sloan don't even think he was." She instructed me.

"I know not to, but it's just that he's acting different. It's just so…" I was at a loss of what to say.

"Creepy. I mean look at him. He's gone for two months of the beginning of the school year and he comes back looking like he did. Like that Paul guy, remember how he looked from the summer to now."

"Well Gaia it isn't that much of a difference in Paul, he's always looked mostly like that. Now he's just taller, and more of an ass."

"And still a man whore."

"He always will be. Now just watch he'll bring Jared in with him. I just never thought he could…" Gaia immediately cut me off.

"Sloan, stop. Just let it go."

"Fine ok. So do you want to here a song I've been working on?"

"Do you even have to ask?"

"Be right back I'm going to go get my guitar." I stood from the warmth of being by Gaia and under the blanket, heading back to the small bedroom. I found my guitar heading towards it in the back corner. I stepped forward stumping my foot on the floor falling.

"Are you ok?" Gaia asked from her previous position on the couch.

"Yeah I'm fine." I yelled back. I gazed back at what had caused me to fall. I loose board, that's weird. Why the hell would the wood be loose here? I turned my body around placing the wood back down. To my surprise it was looser than I thought; I steadily picked it up placing it to the side. I looked down at the whole finding something down below. I slowly placed my hand down, clutching the mysterious item. I pulled my hand from the hole placing the wood paneling back in its place. I looked at my find. A book? I opened running my hands along the edge skimming through the pages. No a journal. I soon found that this cottage held more secrets, and untold stories than I thought.

"What's taking you so long?" Gaia asked impatiently from down the hall.

"Nothing." I quickly slipped the journal underneath the bed that had just recently been placed in our cottage. This was one thing that I felt I had to keep from Gaia I didn't know why, but somewhere deep within me was telling me not to. I grabbed my guitar from its place in the corner dragging it out of its case. I felt if leaving it here was better than at my home. Here in the cottage I could actually think and let my music flow.

I went back into the small living room type of room. I sat by the fire place, that was burning small pieces off wood keeping us warm.

"Are you ready?" I asked. "Now I'm not finished so it might not be that good."

"Just shut up and sing."

"Ok."

I began to strum my guitar the new rhythm flowing from me. The verses began gracefully soon after smoothly coming from my mouth.

I gave you my heart/ I let you own it/ taking all of me/ then slowly it fell apart.

Not knowing what's wrong/ feeling so strong.

Letting it get the best of me/ caught only in a dream.

Now I know/ what was shown/ behind those eyes/ all the lies.

Only because I was caught in my dream.

I continued to strum the guitar finishing the unfinished song off. Gaia just stared at me.

"What?" I asked in wonder.

"Sloan." She said barley audible. "Oh my God! Sloan!" She exclaimed much louder.

"What?" I asked shocked at the way she was acting.

"That was amazing! You wrote that?" She jumped up from her seat still excited.

"Yeah. So… It's not like it's different from my other songs."

"Yes it is! It's so much better! And you want to know why?" I didn't get to answer she went on. "Because it's taken from you're real emotions, real experience. I guess you could say one thing he helped you right that song. The song that'll go to the top of the charts.

"Oh hush, Gaia." I let out a sigh, and began to mess around with some cords. I looked up from my guitar. "You really think so?"

"Uh… Would I be telling you this if I didn't think so? I'm here to support you. I'm not going to boost your dreams telling you can do it when you really can't. I don't lie. I am telling you the truth Sloan Evelyn."

"Don't use my middle name." I said smilingly joking with her.

"I can use it when ever I want. Now go put your guitar up before it becomes apart of the fire."

I laid on the bed Gaia by me, she slid under the covers facing her back away from me and the small light the lantern illuminated. I reached under the bed slowly sneaking the journal onto the bed and began to read. I flipped to the first entry, letting my mind scan and memorize the page.

November 19, 1817

I realize it is wrong of me to feel the way that I do. When seeing him my past world with James, it seemed to vanish. All I feel as if I should be with him. I couldn't do that to James no matter how much I wanted to, we've only been engaged for a week. My feelings for the Indian boy have increased so just with one look. When our eyes met it felt as if gravity wanted him to be with me. As if it was fate.

And now if I think of it my relationship with James isn't what I want. As if my feelings have changed. I cannot defy my father's wishes I know what he wants' for me. Even if my heart aces to change, for the Indian boy. What happened to what I want? Maybe there could be a way for me to sway James' mind. It's seems peculiar to marry James who is seven years my older than I. The Indian boy is my age though.

Now it seems as if my heart longs for him, like something is pulling me towards him. Curse my young seventeen year old mind. So inexperienced, not knowing what is real? Lost in a…

"Go to sleep Sloan, remember we do have school tomorrow." Gaia said groggily pulling me from my reading. I closed the book sliding it back underneath the bed. I couldn't help but wonder what was going on with the poor girl. Having to get married to someone that much older than her, pedophile. I couldn't wait till I could sneak another glimpse into her life again. I slowly shut my eyes trying to find sleep, but my mind was too absorbed with the thought of the woman and what was to happen. Later in the night my thoughts would leave me and sleep would engulf me.