Chapter 1 Born To Fight
"So," he asked, keeping his voice cool. "What's going on?"
John Henry spoke first, his voice grave. "A machine has been sent back in time to Red Valley, New Mexico where it will attempt to murder a fifteen year old boy named John Connor."
All trace of a smile instantly disappeared off John's face. This was real. John Henry was dead serious, as were Cameron and Savannah. "Cromartie," John stated.
"He will succeed," John Henry agreed. "Unless someone stops him."
John felt as if he'd been punched as he realized what John Henry was insinuating. "Now?" he croaked. "You want me to send her now? No…" He shook his head. No, he couldn't do that. He needed her, needed her help to win the war. He couldn't do this alone!
Savannah looked heartbroken for him, but she agreed with John Henry. "You have to. If Cromartie has a chance to change the timeline… you'll cease to exist."
"This isn't Back to the Future," he snapped. "I won't disappear if I wait!"
"How can you be sure?" she asked reasonably.
He shook his head vehemently. "Not now! I can't!"
Cameron stepped forward, speaking softly. "John… you knew this was coming."
He kept shaking his head. "Not now. I'm not ready."
"Will you ever be ready?" she asked. "This has to happen. You know. You and I both knew this day would come."
"This is what you were trying to warn me about," he said. "Last night. You told me everything would change."
"I don't want to leave you," Cameron said firmly. "But I have to. I have to protect you. You can't send anyone else. I can't stay."
"But you can," he insisted. "We can change the future…"
"If I stay, you will never meet me," she explained. "You would grow close to whoever your new protector was. You may even fall in love with Riley. And Jesse would win."
"But you'd lose," Savannah said softly. "You'd lose the war. Without her, you wouldn't have made it this far. She has to be the one to go."
"I will prepare the TDE chamber," John Henry said, moving to the door. Savannah quickly followed after him, leaving John alone with Cameron, his mind racing, trying to think of some way he could talk her out of it, some loophole, some way that she could stay.
She seemed to anticipate what he was thinking. "John… it's time for me to go."
He didn't want her to go. He wanted her to stay here forever, with him. But she was right. There was no one else he would trust to protect his younger self. No one else would prepare him for his role in the future.
Besides, like Weaver had said, it was because of Cameron and his love for her that brought the rogues to his side. And that's what would win this war. Cameron would win this war.
Whether she was here to see it or not.
He forced a smile he didn't feel and took her hand. "I love you, Cameron Phillips," he said softly. "I always will, even if we're miles or years apart. Ours is a love that transcends time, just like Kyle and my mother. And I want you to know something." He paused, pursing his lips. "I was a complete jerk to you. I trampled over you and threw away our friendship. I abandoned you for Riley and I blamed you for everything."
She opened her mouth to protest, but he held up a hand. "But I want you to know that down deep… I had never stopped loving you. I've always loved you. And a love like this doesn't die. Not ever. Not even when separated by two decades. Remember that."
She nodded and he leaned forward and kissed her desperately. How on earth could he let her go? Why did he have to sacrifice everyone he loved? Why him? Why couldn't he be selfish just this once?
Because… I'm John Connor.
He pulled back, opening his eyes to see Weaver standing in the doorway. She gave him a tight smile. "We must perform the memory scrub."
For a moment fear flashed in his mind. "What? So she won't…"
"Don't be absurd," Weaver replied. "We will only erase what is necessary. Memories of Ms. Dawson here in the future and everything that happened in the past. We will leave everything that happened in the future and it will be as if she was never in the past before."
"Is that really necessary?"
"You tell me, Mr. Connor," Weaver replied. "Don't you think that if she knew what she'd already lived through in the past, she might be tempted to change some things?"
He frowned. "Maybe."
"We can't have that," Weaver concluded. "Don't be afraid. John Henry will supervise the process. I promise we will only erase what is necessary."
John glanced over at Cameron who didn't seem fazed at all. "It's okay, John. I asked for her help. It's best this way."
"Right. Of course."
He watched dejectedly as she followed Weaver out into the hall towards the computer lab where John Henry would scrub some of her memories. She wouldn't remember meeting him the first time, or when he had reactivated her after she'd destroyed ARTIE. She wouldn't remember her proclamation of love when he had her trapped, wouldn't remember overriding her own programming so she would spare him. She wouldn't remember Riley, or the jealousy she felt, the time she came into his room and talked to him about being lonely, when she discussed feelings in the car ride from Mexico.
She wouldn't remember that night in the hotel right before she'd sacrificed her chip to John Henry. She wouldn't remember any of that.
But she would remember everything that happened in the future, the love they shared.
She'd remember this.
And that was all that mattered.
Serrano Point
Computer Lab
Cameron stood in the doorway of the computer lab, staring at John Henry who was looking up at her with a sorrowful expression. "You love him."
She felt a spike of emotion, something she'd become accustomed to feeling whenever the subject of John came up. "I do."
"He's sending you back."
"I know."
"You don't want to go."
"My mission is to protect John," she recited. "Even Past-John."
"But you won't be with John," John Henry replied.
"I'll be with a John."
"Not the John who loves you."
His statement was not entirely true. John had just revealed to her that he had always loved her, secretly. Perhaps he'd never even realized it himself until later on. But John Henry was right. It wasn't the John who loved her, not truly. Not yet at least.
"It doesn't matter," she replied. "I have to protect him."
Serrano Point
TDE Chamber
John swallowed hard as he stepped away from TDE, having already programmed in the date. He still couldn't believe this was real. It had been a whirlwind. She'd only been with him for less than a year and now she was getting ready to leave again. She entered, her face stoic and emotionless, but he knew for a fact that it was just a cover.
She could hide her emotions better than he could. It didn't mean she wasn't feeling them.
She stepped into the chamber, walking up to him and pulling the necklace over her head. "You should keep this," she said, dropping it into his open palm. He fought back a wave of tears as his fingers closed around the ring that she'd never got to actually wear properly.
"It doesn't go through," she added.
For her maybe, he thought bitterly. She would get to be with him again, reliving the experiences. But it wouldn't work out for him. He'd still be here, completely alone in the fight against Skynet.
And when he won… if he won… he'd have no one to share it with.
But he couldn't be angry with her. It was impossible. The blue lights began to flicker and John backed up out of range, into the darkness that was dimly lit up by the blue blur of the time displacement waves.
Through the tears glistening in his eyes, he could still see Cameron standing inside the bubble, her eyes locked on his. "I love you, John."
He saw the blue flash and called into the void, hoping his voice would follow her through time. He couldn't see, but as Cameron landed in the past, she heard his voice carry through the spark of blue lightning.
"I love you, too."
John sank to the ground with a moan, staring at the empty place she'd been. His heart was breaking, but he knew this had to happen. No one else would protect him with the same devotion and love as she did. Because no one else could love him like she did. No one else could have turned him into the leader he was destined to be, could have taught him everything he needed to know.
But it devastated him. How much loss could one person take?
This was the end of an era. The end of the year 2027 – one that John Connor had just dubbed the year of sorrows.
In less than twelve months, he'd lost his mother, Allison, Marcus, Max, Kyle, Star, Danny, Seth, Derek, Jesse, Riley, and Cameron. And that was still only scratching the surface of the losses during this war.
There's only one way for you to be safe… and that's to be alone.
She'd said that to him last night, assured him that she meant alone from humans not her. But it hadn't mattered anyway. Because John was lost and alone. Completely and utterly.
He couldn't believe what he had just done. There must have been another way, something else he could have done. He hadn't tried hard enough, hadn't looked long enough for a way where he wouldn't have to send her. Because as he knelt, in grief-stricken agony, staring at the place Cameron had been moments ago, he knew he'd never be the same. He knew what he'd done.
He'd just sent his heart away. He has Lost everything that meant everything that he was fighting for and lost everyone, Allison, Cameron, Derek, Kyle, his mother. Want else can Skynet take my the great John Connor now.
