Disclaimer: I own squat.


If asked, most civilians would agree that Shinra was run on scare-tactics and money. Reno knew better. It was run by paperwork. There was an inordinate amount that flowed through the Turk offices, and somehow, most of it ended up on his desk. His pile of work was always double Rude's, and triple Elena's. He looked at the thick stack with hatred, then sighed and leaned back, stretching.

It was late at night, and the office was practically empty. He swivelled around in his chair, intent on finding someone to bother, for the hell of it. Maybe he would tamper with the coffee machines again- click.

"Click?" he asked out loud. Across the hall, Tseng had a gun pointed at Reno. Reno paled. Tseng was writing with one hand and gesturing to Reno's paperwork with the gun in the other. "Tseng," he whined, "why do I have so much paperwork, yo?"

"Because you do unnecessary damage on your missions, and you ignore the paperwork for days. I have to wait for you to be done before I can leave. The work is backlogged for weeks because of you," Tseng explained calmly. He jiggled the gun a little at Reno, who got the hint. He spun back around, cursing. He lit a cigarette and hunched over his desk, signing papers with a messy scrawl.

There was a loud retort and Reno dove under his desk. The fucking hell was that? He looked around wildly, and his eyes settled on Tseng, who was looking at him with irritation.

"No smoking in the building." Wha? Reno noticed, for the first time, that the end of his cigarette was frayed.

"You shot my cigarette? You shot my fucking cig from behind?! Bloody fuck Tseng! You coulda blown my godamned face off!" Reno's heart was racing.

"My accuracy is unparalleled. Now finish signing Report #3506, I need it."

Reno never complained about his paperwork within Tseng's hearing again.


Tseng gets cranky. Leave him alone. XD