I received this prompt of tumblr Red Swan Drunk. Enjoy
It's after midnight in the small town of Storybrooke Everyone is in bed, everyone but the local Sherriff and everyone's favourite waitress. The two are sat in front of the bar at the diner, drinking. They've just downed there fourth tequila shot and are wasted since they had been drinking since the diner closed at 10:00pm. The red streaked woman wraps her arms around the blonde haired Sherriff's neck.
"You know what we should do?" She whispers to the blonde. Emma turns her head to face the other woman; she captures her lips with her own.
"What?" she asks her when they break apart.
"We should, we should go to the Mayors house and do something" Ruby gets out drunkenly stumbling over her words
"Like what?" The blonde questions, eyebrow raised. The brunette looks deep in thought before a smile comes onto her face
"We could leave a flaming bag of dog crap on her doorstep knock and then run." Ruby explains excitedly.
"Yes, wait no. The only dog I know is Pongo and I don't think that Archie will be too happy with us waking him up." Ruby looks down with sadness at her destroyed plan.
"True. Oh" Ruby pushes herself of the stool but stumbles; she falls to the ground, hands breaking her fall.
"Oh my god, are you okay?" Emma asks concerned for her girlfriend.
"Yeah, I'll probably feel it in the morning though" Ruby pushes herself off the floor and makes her way behind the counter to find some paper and a pen.
"What are you doing?" The blonde asks. She looks at the paper Ruby is writing on and laughs, "That's really good". Ruby laughing herself,
"I know right?" She walks around the counter again, behind Emma, to hold the piece of paper out in front of them both, "We leave this on her doorstep knock and run"
The two drunken ladies find themselves outside the Mayors house. The red streaked girl pushes the paper towards the blonde.
"You go do it"
"No it was your idea you do it" The couple stare each other down until Ruby rolls her eyes,
"Fine, get ready to run" She makes her way down the pathway leading to the Mayors door. She places the paper on the doorstep, she reaches both hands out, one finger goes to the doorbell and holds it down, the other hand knocks rapidly on the door. After a few knocks Ruby stops and legs it down the pathway, grabbing Emma's arm they both run back to the shared apartment of Emma and Mary Margret. They miss an angry Mayor Mills opening her door to see who had woken her up. She looks down at her doorstep and rolls her eyes at what she sees. She bends down to pick up the paper and heads back inside.
The next morning Emma wakes up fully clothed with a splitting headache. She brings her hand to her head as if that could stop the pain.
"Oww" she hears from next to her. Emma turns around to face her girlfriend.
"Rubes, baby you okay" she reaches an arm out to stroke down Ruby's arm.
"No my head hurts" Emma leans in to kiss Ruby's forehead, "My hands hurt" She then proceeds to grab both hands to place gentle little kisses to the palms of both hands. "My lips ache a little bit to" Emma looks up to see Ruby smirking. She leans in for a chaste kiss. She rolls over onto her back while Ruby curls into her side her head on Emma's chest. Emma runs her hand up and down Ruby's back. Ruby traces small patterns on Emma's stomach where her T-shirt had ridden up. Their silence is broken by a shrill ringing of a phone. Ruby buries her head in Emma's chest hoping that it would make the sound stop. Emma reaches into her jeans pocket to pull out the source of the noise.
"Hello" She speaks hoarsely into the phone.
"Miss Swan" Emma's eyes go wide at the voice on the other end of the call. "Whenever you and Miss Lucas are ready will you come down to my office to discuss what you left on my doorstep last night? Maybe then you can explain why you think I'm a big meany, I suck at my job and that I should go step on a flaming bag of dog crap"
"Uh of course, of course Madam Mayor" Emma stumbles
"Good" After that she hangs up. Emma stares at her phone, She only comes out of her trance when she hears a voice.
"What did she want?" Emma looks down at the curious face of Ruby.
"We did something stupid last night Rubes" Emma can't help but laugh when she see's realization hit Ruby.
"Oh. Do we have to go deal with it now?" Emma leans down to kiss Ruby on the lips longer this time.
"No. We need to sleep off these hangovers before we face the wrath of Regina Mills." The pair smile at each other before snuggling down into a peaceful sleep.
