A/N: This was inspired by thanksgiving, obviously. Pretty much spoiler-free. House/Wilson. One-shot. Reviews and concrit are verrrrry appreciated. HAPPY THANKSGIVING! And to those of you non-Americans...happy november 22nd! Haha.
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Chinese Take-Out and Parades
House walked into Wilson's office, cane in hand.
"James!" House greeted him.
"Gregory!" Wilson replied, much less enthusiastically.
"What are your plans for this wondrous holiday evening?" House asked.
"I don't know," Wilson replied, "I thought I might take myself out to dinner."
"By yourself?" House continued, "How sad. Good thing my plans are better."
"Wait, you're actually celebrating thanksgiving?" Wilson asked, shocked.
"I'm ordering Chinese take-out, and I'm TiVoing the Macey's Thanksgiving Day Parade, so I can watch the hot cheerleaders," House replied.
Wilson nodded his head in comprehension. "Sounds about right. So, House, what are you thankful for? I know there must be something in that cold heart of yours…"
"I'm thankful for Vicodin. And underage hookers," he added, as an after-thought. "What about you, Wilson? What you thankful for? Did you get a coupon for divorce attorneys? After one divorce, you get the second one half off, type of deal?"
"Exactly. I'm saving it for the next divorce."
"Who will that be from?"
"I don't know." He seemed to ponder it for a moment, "Maybe my divorce attorney. I'm sure she'd be on-board with a pre-nup."
"Is she foreign? You've always gone for accents," House responded.
Wilson shrugged noncommittally.
"So," House began after a moment, "Rice or noodles?"
House and Wilson sat on House's couch, watching the TiVo-ed Macey's parade, eating Chinese out of take-out boxes.
"How's your lo mein?" House asked.
"You actually care?" Wilson replied.
"I'm trying to figure out if I should steal it."
Wilson frowned and pulled his take-out closer to him.
House motioned toward the television, "That's chicks tits look like they're about to pop out of her shirt."
Wilson snorted and rolled his eyes.
"What, you don't like scantily-clad cheerleaders?" House questioned.
Wilson replied a bit tentatively, "I just think they're…overrated."
House patted him on the back. "It's okay, Wilson. I know you prefer the men on the floats."
Wilson laughed, "You're right, you caught me."
House turned his head sharply towards Wilson. "You do," he stated, a bit of surprise in his voice.
Wilson raised his hands almost in surrender, "I was kidding."
"No you weren't," House replied knowingly. "You're gay."
Wilson gaped at him, stuttering to form a sentence.
"You're gay," House continued, "That's why you can't have a successful marriage. It all fits."
Wilson frowned, "Would you stop treating me like one of your cases to diagnose?"
House smiled, lips pressed together. He patted Wilson on the thigh. "It's okay. You know I don't have a problem with homosexuality, even if I don't choose to go that way."
Despite what House had just said, he didn't remove his hand from Wilson's thigh for the rest of the three hour parade.
fin.
I enjoy reviews. Thanks. XD
