Secrets and Guilt
By Monkan
Pairings: Thor/Loki, Thor/OFC
Warnings: Slash, Incest, more will come.
Disclaimer: I still don't own anything in this story. Maybe the plot but none of the characters, they rightfully belong to Marvel and/or the mythology.
A/N: Here is the beginning of the much awaited sequel to "Secrets and Ties". I hope you enjoy it as much as the first installment.
Summary: Three months has gone by since Loki woke up from his coma without a single memory of his violent past or his relationship with Thor. Loki struggles with a life he knows nothing about, and feels like a stranger in this world that he supposedly belongs in. At the same time, Thor is struggling with his feelings for his half-brother which won't go away.
~ Chapter 1 ~
School had started again after the traumatic first term, but not everything were like it used to be. Thor still had his friends, and he were still the light of the school which had been missed because of everything that had happened in his family.
However, the biggest difference were that Thor now had a younger brother, Loki Laufeyson. His father's unknown child with a mistress, Thor's real half-brother who he never knew about. Of course no one outside the family knew about this fact and that were the way they were going to keep it.
To everyone else, Loki had just been adopted by Thor's family after he had been attacked by his "father" Laufey who had escaped from prison just a few days earlier. The assault had left Loki in a coma until he woke up without a single memory. So to the public, the Odinson had taken in an unfortunate soul.
Things wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for one little detail.
Loki and Thor had been lovers before they became family. And for Loki who didn't remember anything about their relationship it had been a blessing.
But for Thor it had been torture.
Loki sat at the kitchen table with two sandwiches in front of him, he chewed carefully as he read a book about criminology. It was another morning in a house he didn't really know.
When he woke up in the hospital room he had had no idea who he were or where he belonged. Then, a man his age had come in and presented himself as his brother. It should be fine from there because he lived in a fine big house, a lovely mother, a caring father, and a reliable brother. They took him in when he had nowhere else to go. So why did he feel so out of place?
According to his school record he already held two degrees, and he had no idea why he would chose criminology. Absolutely no clue. He knew he had been in an accident and that his family history were somewhat not good, but would that really explain why he were reading criminology as his third PhD?
Then again, there were a lot of things that didn't make sense at the moment.
As lovely as his adoptive mother were, he could see that she were uncomfortable around him for some reason, his adoptive father barely talked to him, and where Thor were concerned there were something he couldn't understand about the other.
He sometimes caught looks that were so filled with pain that he felt something major must have happened between them, but he couldn't remember.
Just at that moment Thor walked down the stair and into the kitchen. When the blond man saw him there were a slight hesitation before he walked over to the fridge and took out the milk.
Loki watched his brother carefully as the other took a swing right from the package. "Long night?" he asked with a slight hint in his voice.
"Yeah." Thor agreed in a gruff voice as he brought the milk down. "Sara were really horny last night."
"No need for details." Loki answered as he looked back on his book, not really focusing on it.
The big muscular man put the milk back before walking with a slight limp around Loki to go back up. "I might have pulled a muscle."
Loki sighed with his eyes closed. "Maybe you should train more."
"Wouldn't help." Thor called as he walked up the stairs. "Sex uses different muscles than sport."
"Ugh." Loki wrinkled his nose.
Sara. The new girlfriend Thor had.
He didn't know much about Thor's dating life but things were looking serious with Sara. A big breasted, slim waistline, long black hair and big brown eyes. She were a bombshell, at least from what he had seen of her in passing. Not to mention Thor were screwing her so fast and often that bunnies could be jealous.
Thundering steps down the stairs drew his attention as Thor half jogged to the front door.
"Going out?" Loki asked as he felt his heart flip a beat.
"Yeah." Thor simply said. "Bye."
And the door closed their conversation.
Loki really didn't know why Thor seemed to avoid him but he guessed that it could have been worse.
Loki walked across the pawned path leading to Valhalla High. A school he supposedly attended before his attack, but he couldn't remember anything. The only proof he had was that when he opened some of his books he already knew them, but he had no idea about the layouts about the school.
Not to mention that people were watching him ever since he returned to school, by Thor's side. It were making him uncomfortable and nervous to be at the center of attention. Still, people didn't really talk to him.
From what he gathered, he had no friends and the only thing he really did in life were study and read. He were a regular in the library, no lunch buddies, and a total social reject.
As he thought several times, his current life weren't so bad. He lived with a generous family who cared for his well being, he went to a school that were out of his social capabilities, he were smart and had a bright future ahead of him.
So why did he feel so out of place?
Thor walked with long, fast steps until he were out of sight from his house. Then, and only then, did he stop and sank down on his knees. With his head bowed Thor took a deep breath and tried to calm his shaking nerves.
Every day were the same.
Every single day he had to face Loki without being able to touch or hold him like he longed to.
His heart still raced when he saw the dark haired man and he wanted nothing more than to seal those tempting lips with his own.
But that was forbidden now, out of his reach. They could never have any other kind of relationship other than family bonds.
He hated it. He hated the world. He hated his father.
And he still loved Loki.
TBC
