DISCLAIMER: Sadly, I do not own South Park. It belongs to Matt and Trey.

Many thanks to SomeoneCMary, for being an awesome friend and reading this through.


Clyde was running down the street as fast as his legs could carry him. He had to make it to Craig's so he could get his reward. It didn't go too well with combination of icy roads and his lack of exercise. He was slipping about and having to grab onto things nearby, like lampposts and fences. He hurried along and cursed the damn assholes that hadn't covered the road in grit.

"Shit!" he yelled as he fell forward, landing badly on his right leg and scraping his hands. That little incident slowed Clyde down, having to walk with tears welling up in his eyes.

When Clyde got to Craig's house, he heard Tweek's screams from inside. He assumed that they were in the middle of a fuckfest. Clyde shrugged and knocked on the door.

No answer.

He sighed and knocked harder, yelling at Craig to come and open the door. Clyde eventually gave up and sat down on the front steps, catching his breath. He wondered how he'd got like this, running all the way to some guy's house just to get a fucking taco. Well, a taco every day and whatever else he wanted from Craig for two weeks. It was just a stupid bet after all, but at least he didn't have to walk around in a skirt every day for the rest of the week like Butters.

After what seemed like ages, Craig finally opened the door and greeted Clyde with his signature finger.

"Oh, it's only you." he said in his monotone voice. "What the hell do you want?"

"About goddamn time, Craig. It's time to pay up." Clyde responded, looking up at the chullo wearing boy. "What are you and Tweek doing anyway?"

"I'm showing Tweek how to play Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood. He's quite good for a beginner." He paused. "What else would we be doing?"

"Dunno. Maybe each other." Clyde suggested and laughed.

"Shut up. You fucking know that Tweek and I aren't like that." Craig said coldly, glaring at the chubby boy, who started biting his lip. "Do you want your stupid reward or not?" he continued, raising an eyebrow. Clyde scratched the back of his head and nodded.

"Then you better shut up about me and Tweek, understood?"

"Okay, okay, fine. Can we just get going now?" Clyde whined. Craig rolled his eyes as he went to get his coat. He couldn't help but think that Clyde was retarded, running all the way to his house in order to get a taco off him. However Clyde thought it was an awesome victory, and he couldn't wait to rub it in Craig's face.

"Hey Tweek!" Craig called out into the hallway. Tweek just screamed, finally responding with a "Yeah?"

"I'm just going with fatass here to get a stupid taco, I won't be gone long." Clyde looked hurt before turning and walking from the house.

"Damn it Clyde, you don't have to take everything I say so seriously." Craig said, joining him. "Where are we going?" Clyde looked thoughtful for a moment, trying to figure out which place in South Park sold the best tacos. They had to be the best of the best, because Clyde couldn't stand cheap, tasteless tacos that you need to drench in salsa and cheese to get some flavour.

"Hmm, maybe Denny's or Sizzler, not sure. What's nearer of the two? Maybe even the food court in the mall? I think that'd be best." he eventually said, starting up a monolouge about tacos.

"I don't care. Let's just get going so I can get back to playing with Tweek." said Craig, cutting him off. Clyde couldn't help but snort at Craig's choice of words.


The line at Taco Xpress in the food court seemed to take forever, especially with Cartman in line.

"Dude, how long is this going to take?" Craig asked, resting his head on his hand. "I can't stand this, not with all the little kids and sluts that hang out around here."

"I'd say around another ten fifteen minutes, give or take another five with fatass." Clyde responded, yawning.

"Damn. I need a cup of coffee or something to wake me up."

"You hang with Tweek too much; you'll be addicted if you keep going at this rate. Then you can scream and twitch and drink coffee together. Sweet, huh?"

"Wipe that fucking smug smile off your face, or you'll regret it. I'll send those Underpants Gnomes on you!"

"Come on, we both know those don't exist. You're really retarded for believing that."


"There, you got your stupid goddamn taco. Happy now?" Craig said twenty minutes later, pulling out his phone and walking away. Clyde was simply more than happy, and resisted the urge to hug him. Well, if he did, he'd risk getting Craig all sticky with sauce. And the taco could be endangered if he put it on a nearby bench a moment. Instead, he chose to simply smile at him, his chubby face beaming. He followed Craig, who was talking to Tweek, giving him instructions of some sort.

"What are you two chatting about? Tonight's plans?" Clyde asked suggestively.

"No you retard. Tweek's having problems with rescuing Caterina Sforza. God Clyde, you have such a fucked up mind." Craig responded, ignoring him. "Anyway, after you reach the next checkpoint, swing across the series of poles..." Clyde shrugged and blocked out Craig's voice as he admired his taco. It looked almost as good as the ones his mother made. He was about to take a bite of it when somebody caught his attention.

"AY, CLAHD!" Clyde jumped at the sound of Cartman's voice, causing him to drop the savoury, saucy goodness.

Everything was in slow motion in his eyes. He watched as the crispy taco shell smashed into tiny little pieces. The meat landed partially on Craig's feet, sour cream staining their trousers. Cheese and salsa was splattered all over the floor. All that was left in his hands was the little paper the taco was in.

It was one of those situations to either laugh or cry.

Clyde did what he does best.