Post break up. Sean's P.O.V

As soon as the horrible words left my mouth I regretted them instantly. I knew it was the only way that T.J. would let me go. After all he's been through, all the drugs from the life he was forced to live in by his parents, I didn't want him following me or wondering if we stood a chance after Collier's threats. I tried to tell myself I was doing it for his own good but there was a nagging feeling in my head which made me think otherwise. If I was nice and let him down easy he wouldn't let me go and would try to get his mother to help us but we both knew she wouldn't even attempt to help him let alone help us stay together. He wasn't helping her aspire in her political career so she didn't care for his needs. I open my phone as I walk out of T.J's apartment building and punch in the number Fred Collier gave me. He answers almost immediately. "I take it you are calling with good news?" he asks fully aware that his blackmail is only good news for himself.

"For you, yes. For me and the children who that bill effect, no. I'll make a statement tomorrow morning saying I'm in full support of the bill, which will get more votes on its side, but in return I want every copy of the pictures."

"It's a deal." His voice says almost gleefully. "Where shall I send the documents to? I presume not to your home address."

"No!" I almost shout. "Send them to my hotel room at the Wrigley. I want them tomorrow morning before I go to the press."

"As you wish." His voice responds before hanging up the phone. I take a quick look up to T.J's window hoping he is ok. It's a stupid want. No one would be ok after having such harsh words hurled at them when they have done nothing wrong but I can't help but hope he knows I didn't mean what I said.

The morning after I head down to the hotel lobby at The Wrigley and find the expected envelope waiting with the receptionist from Collier. I don't open it but call him to say that I have received his end of the deal and will be producing my own end in a few short minutes. "I was hoping that you would call, make sure you issue that statement to the press, they are waiting outside. Someone tipped them off. Enjoy it." The phone is silent and I head out to face the press.

Once my statement is issued I take no questions but get into the waiting car only to be handed a phone by my assistant as she mouths COLLIER as I pres sit against my ear. "I really enjoyed your little statement; it has already pushed the votes for the bill in our favour. I forgot to mention earlier that there is still one copy of the photos out but don't worry they are with Elaine Barrish and she won't do anything with them.

"What?" I growl. "The deal was that you would give me every copy."

"Actually the deal was I would give you all of my own copies. If you want them back speak to Barrish."

"Twenty-five impoverish children just got the Christmas gift they deserve. Now, if you'll excuse me two children in Akron who just asked Santa to bring their daddy home." I said as I left the press to go to and see Elaine Barrish before heading home. I had made an appointment with her after the call with Collier and although it was her chief of staff, and son, Douglas who took the meeting details I still felt nervous about meeting the most powerful woman.

Sitting down in her office across the table from her glaring eyes made me even more on edge then when I had been contacted by Collier about the blackmail. She hated me not just for my views on politics, because I broke her son's heart but the edginess soon disappeared when I remembered that she could have helped us instead of leaving us to be hunted by Collier and his rats. I was the first to speak and when I told her why I was sitting in her office her face hardened and she gave me a much angrier and deeper glare than I thought possible. There were small black rings caused from lack of sleep forming under her eyes as well as a faint red puffiness to her eyes which made me wonder if she had been crying. "Do you have any idea what you have done to T.J?" She asked. I couldn't bring myself to answer with words so instead I just gave one subtly nod. "He hasn't been the same since when you broke up with him. Now, I'm not angry you for that but what I am angry at you for is cheating on your wife, who is oblivious to your orientation, with my son and making him believe that you loved him and where going to leave your wife for him. Where you ever going to do that or where you just playing him along so that he could keep your bed warm while you where away from your wife?" I took me a while to respond.

"I had no intention of leaving my family ma'am-"

"-So you just used my son."

"Until recently when I realised how happy he made me feel but realistically I couldn't advance in my career as a Politian and T.J would get a lot of crap from the press and he has been doing so well with his sobriety that I didn't want to mess that up for him."

"It doesn't matter now. T.J is hurt in so many ways because of you and the lies you fed him." She takes a file out of her desk and hands it to me. "That is all I have on you two. No please go and leave me and my family alone before you cause any more hurt." I follow her instruction and head out of her office and onto the main street to get my plane back home.

It's late when I arrive but she is still up waiting for me as I come through the door. "Hey honey, how was work?" she asks gently kissing my lips.

"It was... fine." I say before kissing her cheeks and taking off my coat.

"We've missed you so much. Come into the kitchen, I've made you some eggnog just for the holiday!" She beams taking hold of my hand. Her hands aren't the same as T.J's. They don't feel right in my hand anymore but I know that I have to stay with these different hands that are too small holding my own and live my life just as I hope T.J. is living his.

Author note: I will be doing more T.J/Sean fics but please review!