Golden Locks, Champagne, and Silver Smiles
By: Megan
Chapter 1: The Sorted History of Nathaniel Fitzwilliam Vanderbilt Archibald and Serena Celia Rhodes van der Woodsen
"Look at you, you're a mess."
"So are you."
The date was September 19, 2007.
"I heard she was pregnant…"
"There was a story involving rehab…
"She looks good, actually…"
The setting was New York City, and the backdrop was an annual, almost weekly, Waldorf family Soirée. The ornate and expensive rooms and hallways littered with guests, glittering diamonds encased in the ornate setting that was the exclusive, lavish Upper East Side. And in the middle of the dim, was the crown jewel, with dancers legs, tiny arms, and an exquisite face rivaling that of any Botticelli angel, topped with a mess of silken blonde hair. The voices, joining in one magnificent and awful crescendo, assaulted her ears. But, Serena had spent her entire life facing lies and rumors, letting them slide down her (usually) bare back and scantily clad shoulders, willing herself to forget the spiteful gossip, so why should today be any different? Yet it was. Because the once beloved place that she had called home now seemed foreign and dangerous. She had been away at boarding school for an entire year now.
"So I told him to forget it: I don't care if it is mahogany, it clashes with my sofa."
And that is how she spotted Lily.
"Mom! Hey…"
"Oh, Serena, darling."
The two blondes hugged each other, and Serena could tell from the all to brief contact that her mother had been on several more of those micro-biotic diets.
"So, where is he?"
The look on Lily's face read, I cannot believe you brought this up and we will not talk about this now… Serena let out an exasperated sigh, typical.
"What? They haven't let him out yet?"
"Let's not talk about this now, sweetheart. I though you might like to see some of your friends."
"Thanks."
And there he was. To her right, in the doorway. His dark blue eyes staring directly at her, and when her wandering gaze had met is, she bit her bottom lip, as her heart rate had accelerated at a breakneck pace and it seemed as if all the air had been knocked out of her delicate lungs. He looked more handsome than she had remembered, his golden-brown hair wavier than usual, the suit that he wore slightly wrinkled, his lips swollen. Yet he was perfect. He always was perfect to her. Blair then appeared in the doorframe, blocking Nate from Serena's view. Standing in the middle, in the way, as always. Serena nearly smiled at the sublime cruelty of it all. Then it had hit her; that the reason for Nate's swollen lips and disheveled appearance had most assuredly been caused by a romantic rendezvous with Blair. The thought nearly made Serena choke.
"Hi Serena, so good to see you."
"So good to see you."
Her (once, and hopefully still, but probably not) best friend's arms embraced her, and all at once Serena felt suffocated by the smell of Nate's cologne on Blair's skin, as the animated voice emanating from the petite brunette's mouth reminded her that she had quite a bit of explaining to do.
"Come on, we're about to have dinner."
"Yeah, actually, there is somewhere I have to go."
"You're leaving?"
"Yeah, I just... I don't feel well. I just wanted to come by and say hi. I'll see you at school tomorrow."
Serena had escaped the awkward situation. (As it would be, if your supposed best friend disappeared in the middle of the night without a word and then popped back up after nearly a year with no explanation.) But, being the one who pulled the disappearing act in the first place, she figured that the burning questions could be answered later, those unrepressed, ever constant memories resolved at a different time. Now she needed to see Erik. She needed to see her brother. Out of Blair's sight, her heart sped up again as Nate began walking towards her. His heart was beating even faster than hers. She was the last person that he had ever expected to see. (Yet the one that he had always hoped for.)
"Hey you," Serena breathed as Nate hugged her, wrapping her arms around his warm and taut waist, hanging on tight. Nate's cheeks had turned pink, as he told himself to calm down, resisting the urge to lift her of the floor and spin her around, telling her that he loved her. But he wouldn't, not for the risk of being laughed at. He couldn't, because he was with Blair. He wanted to kiss her face over and over. The moment Serena saw this look, this look of pure happiness wash over his face; she let go, her hands falling at her sides, her face crumbling.
"Nate," the name escaped her lips, as she tried to hold back a sob, swallowing hard. "I need… I need to talk to you."
"Alright."
Nate clasps her hand to lead Serena into an adjoining room. She stops him, shaking her head.
"Not here, not now."
Serena Celia Rhodes van der Woodsen: The talk of Manhattan, the uncompromising, always surprising, beguiling IT girl. Naturally slender and ethereally beautiful, with a fashion sense to rival that of Kate Moss. She has been in love with her childhood friend, Nate Archibald, for years. Yet he has always belonged to her best friend, Blair Waldorf.
Nathaniel Fitzwilliam Vanderbilt Archibald: The conventional UES Golden Boy; heir of the Vanderbilt empire and incredibly good-looking, almost ridiculously attractive. He has secretly been in love with his childhood sweetheart's best friend, Serena, for as long as he can remember.
He found her, outside the Palace hotel, after she stood him up at a coffee shop, where they were supposed to finish their conversation.
"Nate." She wasn't exactly surprised to see him, to see that he had found her. He always did.
"Oh Hey, your mom told me you guys were staying here at The Palace."
"Yeah… we're renovating, again. You know my mom, if it's not broke, break it."
An airy laugh, a soft chuckle.
"So what are you doing here?"
"Well, you stood me up. I just wanted to see how you were. You seemed kina upset last night."
Why do you think?
"I have to get going and change for school, I'm going to be late."
"Serena…"
I love you…
Nate came closer, his fingertips brushing against hers. Serena looked down at them, they felt soft and warm. She inhaled his scent, and he smelled like the cleanest, most delicious boy alive. She knew that she was home. Hot tears mercilessly pricked at her crystal blue eyes. And she knew what she had to do.
"No. No."
"But you're back now."
"I didn't come back for you."
I'll always come back for you…
"Look, Blair's my best friend and you're her boyfriend and she loves you, that is how things are supposed to be."
Although I wish they weren't.
And so Serena let him go, she walked away, leaving him behind. Because she could not do this to Blair now or ever, because it would hurt her beyond belief, to betray her friend, and she would despise herself even more than she does know; for being herself, because being herself meant loving Nate; and because loving Nate meant hurting Blair. This is why New York felt dangerous and foreign now. Because it was not home. Nate was her home, and he was forever denied her, they were forever denied each other. Serena has always known, honestly, although she was too afraid to admit it, to Nate or even herself. And it is so simple, so frightenly simple in how it hurts. Ever since she fell in love in an empty bar.
Authors Note: This is a multi-chaptered story revolving around the love triangle involving Serena/Carter and Serena/Nate. Blair/Chuck will make regular appearances. And Vanessa haters can rejoice because, being one myself, she will be gone within the third chapter.
