Lost

Horatio knelt by a disturbance in the brush and looked out over the expanse of Everglades that stretched before him. Somewhere, out in the wild wetland his brother in law struggled to live. Sharova said that Eric had been bleeding heavily before they crashed. That meant that one of the officers had hit him as they fled.

Horatio stood and cast about for any clue as to where Eric might be. If he was bleeding as Sharova said, then the alligators would be drawn to the scent of the blood. They would be hungry. Gators were always hungry. Slipping on his sunglasses, he began to backtrack and head back to the Hummers. That's when he heard it. It was so soft at first that he didn't think it was more than the wind in the reeds, but as he followed the curious keening sound, it became more distinct. Someone was in complete agony and the sound was terrible and raw. A momentary flash of hope that it was Eric shot through him along with the realization that the sounds were too high pitched to be that of a man.

Still following the sound, Horatio rounded a low clump of scrub bushes to find the source of the sound. Calleigh knelt on the ground on hands and knees, rocking and giving full vent to the pain she was in. She drew in another ragged breath before letting it out in an agonized keen.

Horatio's heart shattered, hearing and seeing what he had. In all the years they had known each other, never once did he see her so raw. Sure, he had seen her cry when Speed was killed, but it was nothing compared to what he was bearing witness to just then. He knelt at her side and gently touched her shoulder. "Calleigh?"

Calleigh's head snapped up and she turned her tear-stained face to him. Her words were incoherent as she physically crumpled further, body wracked in misery and guilt.

He gathered her in his arms to let her spend herself out, trying to soothe her. Finally she was calmed enough to listen to him. "We'll find him, Sweetheart."

Calleigh sniffed, wiping at the tears staining her cheeks. "No, you don't understand. He's injured and bleeding and it's my fault. It's all my fault."

"How can that be?"

"I hit him. I'm the only one that fired at the car. I shot Eric. If he dies out here it's on my head. If he dies; I killed him. I killed him. It wasn't supposed to be like this. I can't do this," she rambled recklessly. Suddenly she yanked her badge and firearm from her side, shoving them both into Horatio's hands. "I can't."

Horatio laid them aside in favor of wrapping his arms back around her. She was inconsolable and he wasn't too sure why. What she had said made sense but there was obviously something more. "Talk to me, Calleigh; please. I need to understand."

Her voice was muffled against his chest. "I can't lose him. He means too much to me. We just found each other. We've been so happy. I should have known it couldn't last. Something always happens, always. I have to be cursed because I can't think of any other reason why all my relationships end up in pain. I knew it was a bad idea. This always happens when my heart rules my head."

He sat back, reeling at the revelation that Calleigh and Eric were in a serious relationship. How had he missed it? He tightened his grip on her as she was seized by a fresh torrent of tears. She shook from the force of it. "Then that's all the more reason we need to find him. Calleigh, sweetheart, I know you're tied up in knots of worry, fear and guilt, but I need you to pull it together and help me find Eric. Can you do that?"

She felt as if she were being torn in two. "No."

Horatio stroked her hair and rubbed her back. "Yes you can. I know you can. One deep breath at a time. You can do this, sweetheart. Eric needs you right now; he needs you to find him. If you had known that Eric was driving that car you never would have shot so high up, would you?"

Calleigh shook her head. "No. I can't do this, Horatio: I can't."

He placed a soft, chaste kiss to the top of her head. "You can. Eric was helping Sharova get out of the mob. That's why he was here. He was doing a good thing. He was in the very wrong place at the very wrong time. Help me find him so things can be made right. Help me, Calleigh because I can't do this without you."

"Then I'm doubly damned," Calleigh said, fighting more tears. Until just then she hadn't realized how deeply she cared for Eric. Feelings that had only been nebulous and unborn two and a half years before had matured and come to full bloom. She had never really envisioned falling so completely in love with anyone before, let alone her best friend.

Horatio's mind whirled as he labored to find something, anything that would help pull Calleigh back from the edge. "Calleigh, you have to do this. You have to do this for the both of you. Don't let the County be proven right. Don't give Stetler the advantage. Relationships can work out just fine between co-workers, even when forces pull things apart. Help the both of you."

Calleigh listened to his words, realizing, yet not really caring, that she'd outed her and Eric. All she wanted was Eric back and safe and sound. She wanted him to not hate her for shooting him. She hadn't known it was him behind the wheel at first. The sun had glared off of the windshield and she couldn't see the driver. Gradually, she was able to shove her emotions into the background and regain a semblance of composure. "You're right. I'm sorry-"

He shook his head. "No. Just take your badge and firearm and help me bring Eric home. By now Natalia and Ryan will be processing the car and may already have some answers." He helped her off the ground and handed her a handkerchief so that she could wipe the tear tracks from her cheeks. "Once we have him back, then we'll talk about how to handle the two of you and IAB."