Fake Plastic Trees
Grissomsbutterfly
AN: Dedicated to all who have lost someone over the holidays. I am fortunate enough to be surrounded by friends and family- A big hug goes out to all who have lost someone around this time of year. It may be hard but you will always have someone. Thanks to Mel for the amazing beta job- as always. Happy Holidays everyone.
--
She
looks like the real thing
She tastes like the real thing
My
fake plastic love.
But I cant help the feeling
I could blow
through the ceiling
If I just turn and run
And it wears me out,
it wears me out
It wears me out, it wears me out.
-Radiohead
--
"By all accounts he has lead a meager life, an un-noticed life. And then all of a sudden in a flash...It's over. And now for him the real suffering begins."
--
Grissom needed a break, it wasn't a desire or a choice- it was a necessity. His stress level was beginning to have no limits and he ached every time he ventured into a new crime scene. Years ago he once felt promise, curiosity and a hint of excitement when jumping into a new case. Now all he felt was dread and sorrow for every victim he met.
As the holidays drew near there was still no sign for "peace on Earth and goodwill to men." Grissom could only hope that William's could tear him from the world of death and back into his peaceful and scientific world of entomology. Bugs were innocent life forms, they had a purpose. Sometimes he could only wonder as to what the human race's purpose was. Humans are the only species to kill their own kind without a need or a cause. Some kill for the excitement while others kill to hide the truth of their own misdeeds. Animals were at least honest about their needs.
Today was the day he was leaving Sara. It wasn't forever, nor did he want it to be. In fact if he had a choice in the matter, he would take her with him, even though the very notion in itself was selfish. As he entered their apartment he looked around quickly for any hint of her presence. The sweet pea scent casually lingering in the air made his heart flutter, already causing for his lips to turn up in a devious grin.
She waited for him.
As he entered their living room he was pleased to see that she was decorating their tree, a tree he would never see on Christmas. He knew that his position at William's came at a horrible time, he wanted more than anything to be with her on their second Christmas as a couple. The scent of fake plastic trees filled his nostrils as he silently made his way over to her as she put up ornaments in deep thought. The branches welcomed Sara's touch, whereas whenever Grissom attempted at embracing its synthetic beauty the needles merely fell to the ground.
She looked upset, but she had a right to be. He shouldn't be leaving her, even if it could mend his broken spirit.
"I didn't think you would say goodbye." She hoarsely whispered, as she placed a Santa ornament on a branch. Her back was still turned to him, even as his hands slipped around her waist. He lowered his head as he kissed the side of her neck.
"I hate goodbyes." He simply stated.
Sara finally turned around to face him, still within the safety of his arms.
"Then why come back?"
Grissom cocked his head to one side and avoided the question.
"I think we should exchange gifts through the mail. I still haven't found the right thing. I guess I'm a procrastinator huh?" He forced out a laugh trying to make light of the situation.
"You rushed back here only one hour before your plane takes off to tell me that?" She inquired, gently brushing an eyelash away from his cheek. A smile formed automatically on her lips, as he blushed slightly at the sudden contact.
Truth be told, Grissom had been having a distinct feeling of panic in the past two days. As his departure grew closer he quickly become more protective of Sara and he had no explanation for his behavior. He knew he was being paranoid; his manly need to protect the woman he loved was taking over.
"No, I came back for this." Grissom explained as his lips parted and met hers. He looked up briefly from their embrace to meet the illuminated glow of the tree behind him. It was beautiful no matter how fake it appeared, however beauty never lasted.
Maybe this goodbye wouldn't be as hard as he thought. After all, his departure was not forever.
XxxX
The plane ride was uneventful and boring. He looked through all of his notes on mosquito breeding and habit statistics and was satisfied that he could teach with the knowledge he had on the matter. It had been a while since he last lead a class, but the prospect of teaching a new generation brought back a new spark into Grissom's life. Lately his work at CSI was taking its toll; he was starting to be thankful for accepting the offer William's had laid out.
His hotel room was spacious, cozy and…Lonely. A small Christmas tree lay in the corner by the fireplace, a few decorations hung from its branches. It was pitiful compared to the specimen Sara had put together at home. His bed was a double, far larger than what he needed and he almost had the urge to call room service and order a smaller suite. The vastness of his room daunted him; this would be his home for three weeks.
Three weeks without Sara and their fake plastic tree.
XxxX
Sara ran into the mall and accidentally pushed an old lady over in the process. After the standard apology, she entered the crowded plaza, shaking her head over the mess she had gotten herself into. It was three days before Christmas and she still did not purchase Grissom's gift. It wasn't a lack of motivation or devotion that impaled her shopping purgatory; rather it was his sudden absence that took her heart out of the gift giving equation. What gift could possibly encompass her love when words could not come close to defining it?
As she stood in the middle of the mall's center court the answer came to her. Her grin widened as she approached the large evergreen on display. Her attention was immediately diverted to the top of the decorated tree. A star shone as proud as a lion looking down on its pride; a perfect symbol, a perfect gift for their fake plastic tree.
XxxX
Grissom held Sara's gift one last time, his hands shook nervously as he placed it in its velvet box. He was inspired almost immediately when he first laid his eyes on the true object of beauty.
A delicate butterfly crystal ornament lay inside its handmade cocoon of velvet; never to truly metamorphize into anything other than beauty. Every look made Grissom smile wider.
It was a perfect symbol, a perfect gift for their fake plastic tree. With a little finesse, their tree could grow into something more. Perhaps with love it could become an illusion of reality, becoming stronger rather than fragile.
He kissed the top of the box before sealing it once and for all.
It was only a matter of time before he received her token of love, an object that he was sure to truly cherish.
XxxX
Sara's patience paid off. Christmas Eve brought good tidings as she heard a faint knock on her door…Their door.
The FedEx man looked like an average delivery guy: clean-cut, well groomed and polite. It was when he didn't ask for a signature that she knew something was wrong. She glanced over one last time at their tree before stumbling onto the floor.
They should have known—the evidence wasn't clear.
He wasn't caught, he would never be.
Maybe she could give him one last clue to his puzzle, even if it meant that everything would come to an end.
XxxX
The knock at the door didn't even wake him. In the week he had studied at Walden Pond he couldn't stop thinking about her. He finally had something that he once thought was unattainable- love. They had been happy for far too long; an anomaly. "Happiness comes to all who seek it", a philosopher once said; Grissom didn't believe it. He believed in cause and effect- the butterfly effect. Perhaps he was paranoid, but he always believed that too much happiness was like the calm before the storm.
The storm had come; he just didn't realize it yet. The rain and the wind would be heavy and eventually blow him away like he always imagined.
Grissom inhaled a deep breath as he looked at the miniature plastic tree behind him.
The FedEx man greeted Grissom with a jolly "happy holidays", a greeting he could have done without.
The brown parcel bore his name and address that still seemed foreign to him.
"Sign here." The man cheerfully commanded. It was nice to know that someone would be enjoying their holidays.
A tinge of nervousness sent Grissom into a state of confusion.
Why should he be nervous? If anything he should be happy. The gift he held was from the only woman he cared about.
As he shut the door behind him and slumped on his bed, he began to slowly rip away at the paper. The box he now had before him was unwrapped and slightly dented. Sara was usually not one for surprises, but this Christmas would be the first time she did not elaborately wrap his gift.
As he lifted the lid and peered into the unknown, he immediately felt the room whirl and spin as he felt bile rise up to his throat. Without thinking, he dropped the box to the ground, un-harming the contents he would usually delicately preserve.
As Grissom rocked back and forth on his couch, he succumbed to the loneliness once and for all; the box looked on without pity or solace.
Inside the box was an elaborate scaled model of Sara's apartment. Trapped under their tree lay Sara, dead with a crystal butterfly ornament through her chest. Blood was everywhere. Their fake plastic tree was no more, its branches were broken and its bristles were scattered about.
"God no!" He shouted.
Their tree was dead and no amount of water or love could bring it back.
In one simple box was his life: fake and void of realism. Nothing is ever perfect, even when synthetically mastered in a factory.
As Grissom's cries grew faint a group of carolers began to take over his sobs of sorrow.
"Silent night, holy night. All is calm, all is bright. 'Round yon virgin Mother and Child. Holy infant so tender and mild. Sleep in heavenly peace… Sleep in heavenly peace."
End
