A/N; Hey everyone I'm new here and I don't exactly know much about how to use this thing yet but I'm getting there. Hehehe
I'm really excited about this story as it's not your average J & R romance it has a sick twist so I hope you like it! Remember this is M Rated and in some chapters you will truly realise that.
I hope you like the first chapter. Please review I really enjoy what you all think! Thank You! - Isabelle
Here's The FULL SYNOPSIS;
Nessie-the daughter of Bella and Edward Cullen has finally found her other half. Jacob Black. He has been everything she needed him to be from a; playmate to a older brother to a best friend to finally a... lover . Her undying feelings for him got wilder and wilder as she grew and the lust she suffered for him was slowly killing her. But, finally they tie the notch thinking nothing can go wrong when Jacob marries Nessie. Finally.
But what they're thinking a happily ever after... how long until it isn't?
This story starts when Nessie is getting wed to Jake and goes on their honeymoon. Thinking they have the rest of their life of happiness was the wrong way to go. ALWAYS EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED.
You won't believe what happens in...
"When I'm Alone" - "Renesmee and Jacob's Undying Love"
The Continuation of the Twilight Saga.
Chapter One
'Darling, you are taking an awful long time in there' mom asked through the door, her voice full of worry.
I was fixing the strings on my dress, I mean wedding dress which Alice had designed and sent away for me.
'It's a Vera Wang! Everyone looks good in it!' I remember Alice explaining in a high bell tone as I starting freaking out in case it wouldn't hang right on me.
'I'm fine mother, just I can't get it to tie right' I fidgeted with the strings of the corset when mom nearly burst down the door and was right behind me tying the strings into what I guessed a beautiful bow.
Mom looked at me from the mirror and gasped 'I never thought I'd see the day but now my Nessie's all grown up' Mom looked like she'd cry which is impossible in her case.
She cupped my cheek, her cool palm soothing my overheating body 'you look beyond beautiful, my dear'
I felt a tear in my eye as I gazed up at my enviable goddess like mother 'Thanks mom, I'm just so nervous'
She patted my back 'Just look at yourself, you are such a beautiful young woman and in this dress you look like a Princess.
'You can entrance any man with one look; you are smart, lovable, adventurous and strong. No wonder Jacob fell for you with one glance well… besides the imprint thing' –I giggled a little feeling more self confident by the minute.
'Thanks again mom, for the great pep talk' – she lightly kissed me on the cheek before nearly being trampled by little Aunt Alice.
'What are we doing standing around? The wedding is out there people' she pointed her manicured nails-which Rosalie did also on mine and mom's nails this morning-to the window which we could just about see people gathered around talking and laughing all in wedding attire.
I gestured my hands in a flowing motion as if blowing out all the nervousness and letting the excitement take its place. 'Okay, I'm ready'
'Ready? You don't have your shoes on and you don't even have you veil on properly… Oh, my am I the only one sane here?' Alice started babbling as she what looked like dancing around the room grabbing my shoe box and hairpins.
'Now, you look good' – I peered into the mirror taking in my appearance in full. My long Vera Wang gown came down to the floor with a slight small train. Delicate beaded flowers flowed down over my breast area until stopped by the lacy corset that heisted up my breasts in a complementing way. The lacy corset had little diamonds placed separately around it. As if someone had randomly sprinkled them on. The corset stopped before the curves of my hips in which it flowed gracefully to the floor. My hair was done by Esme. She tied back my hair loosely with Quileute hairpins Jake gave me; he said his mother wore them at their wedding. I gladly took them of course. A few strands left to hang flowingly around my face.
My hair was shielded by a white lacy translucent veil that Vera Wang also created. Alice clipped it on properly at the back of my small tiara mom gave me.
'Alice made me wear this on my wedding day, and so I just thought I'd give it to you... for good luck' I remember mom stumbling trying to hand me the hair piece probably remembering what happened when the tiara was taken off. Eek, I don't want to think about that.
Alice did light Smokey eye-shadow, which I was happy with as I never wear make-up as I think it itches my skin plus Jake always said I was way to pretty for make-up anyways but this looked fantastic I felt just as pretty as all the other women in my family.
'Thanks mom, thanks Aunt Alice this is absolutely perfect' I smiled hugging them not caring if I ruined their hair when I ruffled my hands on their heads.
Alice nearly screeched 'Thanks but now I have to spend the next minute fixing this' she pointed to her new hair-courtesy of me-which looked like a birds nest.
Mom giggled and hugged me again 'Here, I wasn't going to give this to you yet but why not' mom opened a box that held a gorgeous silver necklace, it was beaded with pearls and white diamonds until it met a big aqua rock that had bending and binding silver twisted around it which made it look even more beautiful.
I gasped even by letting my fingertips rub it 'Mom... I-I can't take this... it's yours'
She took the necklace out of the swaid box and held it up 'Think of it this way, it's new and blue. Then you have my tiara which is borrowed also'
'Oh, mother I-I don't know what to say. Dad gave you this for you birthday-I... I can't' I pushed away the necklace with my palm feeling guilty for even thinking of taking it.
Mom looked sympathetic 'Don't worry, your father won't mind and you can always give it back. But in the mean time wear it' - she opened the catch before stepping behind me and as I lifted up my hair and veil.
When she closed the catch of the necklace and let it hang down, it hung down to the gap of my breasts.
The big aqua gem bringing more attention to my cleavage.
'With a strapless dress, a long necklace is always the key' mom smiled as she handed me the gloves Rosalie picked up in Paris.
I giggled 'Mom you spend too much time around Alice' -Mom started to laugh only realising herself how much Alice had rubbed off on her.
'You're right; I should probably rethink the weekend shopping thing'
'Don't even think about it!' Alice shouted out from the bathroom.
I laughed as I pulled the gloves up where they reached my elbows 'I must have forgotten the super hearing thing also'
We heard Alice's sarcastic laugh before Esme entered the room wearing such an elegant dark violet dress which hung to her calf 'I heard you were still here so I said I pop back in to see you'
Esme had been down at the cliff where the wedding ceremony was going to be held checking if the place was all ready and set before the guests made their way there. Me and Jake shared such life changing moments there and so we just decided to hold another one there by having our wedding in the exact same spot.
'Is it crowded there grandma?' I asked before she hugged me gently and pulled back to get a good glimpse at me.
'Don't worry about it, when I was coming back in I only saw the Amazon coven, the Denali coven, the Egyptian coven, the Irish coven, the Olympic coven, the American nomads and the European nomads. Vladimir and Stephen couldn't come for difficult reasons... they hate wolves' Esme whispered the last bit before giggling 'and then there's the wolf pack and all Jake's family, some of your friends and the village people'
'Thanks Grandma, that really helps' I smiled sarcastically
She smiled brightly and brushed my cheek 'Don't worry pumpkin, this is the biggest day of your life-the guests will be the last thing on your mind'
'Esme...' Mom tsked from the bed where she put on the high heels Alice replaced from mom's original converse which I didn't realise she was wearing until now.
Grandma giggled 'Sorry...'
'Yes, I suppose the last thing Bella wants to hear about is when her daughter will finally have sex for the first time it'll be with her former best friend' Rosalie popped her head in the door smiling viciously.
I heard mom growl from across the room 'Since when was he a "former" friend?'
'I dunno, maybe since he had dark thoughts about your daughter...' Rosalie giggled as she escaped before mom could grab her.
'Bella, why aren't you wearing the heels?' we heard Alice lecture mom.
Mom sighed heavily as if she'd need to anyway 'The heels hurt and I feel more comfortable in these'
'These? These are rugged old punk runners that you wore three years ago! And you'd even think about wearing them to your daughter's wedding? I'm surprised Bella, I thought you were learning' Alice pouted as she crossed her arms over her chest.
Mom stood up and placed a hand on Alice's shoulder 'Sorry... I just... I tried to wear them but they cling to my feet too much'
'They are supposed to cling; if they didn't cling then your feet would fall out!' Alice *hmped* at mom and turned her head to me with a cheap grin on her face.
Good ole, Alice always as per usual up to her guilt trip tricks. I knew mom would crack any second now.
5, 4, 3, 2, 1...
'Okay, okay I'll wear them just this once, since its Nessie's day and all' Mom grumbled before taking off the converse and slipping on the black wedge sandals Alice had bought in New York last week.
Alice let out an unmistakable Alice bell chime giggle 'I knew you'd say it'
'Besides the fact that you envisioned it that is' Esme smiled from before me as she interjected her "daughter's" bickering.
Mom and Alice looked at each other before laughing again 'Well everyone seems set in here' Grandpa Carlisle spoke with a genuine smile on his pale face from the doorway.
Esme smiled when he pecked her lightly on the check, I wonder if Jake and I will be like that when we are finally husband and wife.
Husband and Wife, just thinking about it makes my heart quicken and my palms somewhat sweaty 'Mom, where's dad?'
Mom got up and tried stepping around the room in her new heels before answering me 'He's just downstairs, why honey?'
'Am… cos' he's walking me down the aisle and all I was just worried in case he was gone to the ceremony already'
'Don't worry Ness, Edward decided not to leave until you were ready' Carlisle smiled reassuringly from Grandma's side.
I sighed relief; dad-besides Jasper-could always calm me down when I was going berserk.
'I think we're ready' Esme smiled as she handed me my bouquet she arranged. Beautiful white, orange, pink and red roses contrasted beautifully together and the silk red ribbon sealed it almost with a kiss.
Dad was behind me in a flash gazing at me in the mirror 'You look like a goddess' he smiled and kissed my forehead when I turned to hug him.
But, I knew that mom was his goddess. I just couldn't wait til' I could finally see Jake and hear him say it to me truthfully.
A shiver of excitement went down my spine; I really couldn't wait to see him in the suit Alice had created for him. Just thinking about the soft black fabric accenting his broad features nearly made me lick my lips in playful curiosity.
Then the honeymoon… That's when the nerves kicked in. What if I look stupid? Or if I don't co-operate properly? This is the first time we ever will make love to each-other and just the thought made me feel awkward and out of place. I mean me against Jake he would definitely win in the "hottie scale".
I heard dad cough and give me a knowing look. I bit my lip forgetting that he could read my thoughts.
'Try to keep your mind at ease today, okay Nessie?' Dad spoke with a half smile.
I pulled away from our hug to look at him 'Daddy, I'm going to be a married woman and still be bossed around by my parents?'
'Now, now dear you must remember you are only seven years old' he spoke in his usual cool and calm voice.
I giggled looking down 'But, I'm truly nine-teen in appearance'
He patted my head softly not ruining Esme's beautiful work 'Well, all I'm saying is… keep your "imagination" as limited as possible'
'Edward, how can you say that? I'd bet on yours and Bella's wedding day you had a very "creative" mind' Alice tsked from behind us using her middle fingers in annotation as she spoke.
If mom could blush she would definitely be now as she looked at Dad through curious eyes 'I wonder if he did' she stepped closer to us
Letting go of Dad neck I stepped back gesturing for mom to take my place and she gladly accepted. I almost envied mom and dad's love for each-other. It was so strong and passionate I just hope Jake will be like that with me.
Even without the imprint he has on me I'm sure I'd love him just as much as I do now. I hope he's doing okay right now. Alice took my phone and forbid me to go see him like I usually would.
'Well people, we better be heading away now' Esme grabbed her matching violet purse and let it hang gracefully on her shoulder.
Alice nearly jumped up and down with joy 'Queue the limo' she spoke monotone into her mobile
"Affirmed, be right there, Mrs. Hale" we heard a deep voice return before Alice giggled and closed her flip phone down.
'Well, you heard the man…' she glared at us when we didn't move '… now!' she almost screamed at us
'We should go, her head is giving me a headache' Dad squeezed his nose as if he had a killer headache, which is impossible.
Alice giggled shyly which was a first as we passed her and stepped into the corridor of the Cullen's house.
Alice stood by the window and made a hand gesture to Emmet who started telling people where to go for the ceremony.
I took a deep breath and soon mom was by my side holding up the train of my dress and saying soothing words to tame my unquenchable fear of facing the big crowd. I mean the Amazon, Irish, American Nomads, Egyptian, Denali, Olympic and European Covens weren't all that bad but then there's all Jake's pack and then Sam's pack and then Lucy and Serrah and their families too.
'Don't worry, Lucy and Serrah are too busy chatting about how "hot" the tanned boys in the suits look' Dad scoffed lightly beside me.
I nearly jumped, God he was so agile I didn't even smell him – 'Maybe that's because you were nervous to realise' he added in his casual cool voice that my Mom smiled slightly to.
'Stop reading my thoughts!' I barked not really meaning it; maybe all the nerves were turning me into one of those things… Zilla something sometimes on television.
'I believe it's BrideZilla' Dad pointed out as we reached the bottom of the staircase which took a little longer since most of us were in heels and floor length dresses.
I nearly gasped when I saw Alice already downstairs sitting pretty waiting for us 'H-how did you get down here so quick?'
She giggled and hopped up twirling on the balls of her feet 'I couldn't take your slow pace so I jumped the stairs'
'Same ole Alice, always finding shortcuts' I smiled almost to myself.
'Don't you know it' she laughed happily, making me almost gawked at her how could she be so happy? When I was almost choking back the nerves?
'Maybe because she's married so many times already and besides she isn't the one making the big step… now is she?' Dad looked at me before he opened the door to a sleek black limo.
I inhaled the forest air which cleansed me of most of my worries 'I guess so'
'Come on, people we'll miss the wedding' whined Alice who was peeping her head out of the limo's tinted window.
Dad took my hand and led me to the door of the limo. I smiled faintly as Mom came over to help me get all of my dress into the car without dirtying it or getting it caught in the door.
The car drive to the cliff was longer than it actually was. I felt like I wanted to burst the windshield open, hop out and run far beyond the Canadian Border by miles. But that was stupid thinking, truthfully I wanted Jake to be here, holding my hand like he would usually do if I was worried or upset-which freakishly he always knew when.
I watched as my dad's face turned to different expressions as he listened to my rambling thoughts. I gulped again feeling the lump in my throat build as I could finally see the cliff approaching and see all the dots-people-moving around.
I felt mom squeeze my hand softly from beside me. I had nearly forgot I was surrounded by people-actually vampires-in the limo. I was so indulged in my thoughts that I almost forgot why I was rightfully here in the first place.
'Nearly there' Alice chirped as she gazed out the window and hopped up and down in her seat.
I definitely missed Jasper in this car. He had to go with Emmet to the ceremony didn't he? And, leave an over hyped Alice with us and have no control over it?
I saw dad place his hand on Alice's knee and as he stared at her deeply 'Alice… calm'
She gulped and nodded 'Okay…' and just continued staring out the window in silence.
Dad smiled at me when he noticed I had seen. Thanks dad, the last thing I needed was reminder I thought to him.
Dad nodded 'But dear, you must remember you can't actually resent this. It is your wedding after all' he whispered so low that barely I could hear him.
I nodded and gazed back out the window. He's absolutely right, I must get a grip just forget everyone else and remember… him. Jake, Jacob, my Jacob.
Just imagining us on the cliff, having a picnic like every other Saturday morning. Me reading him novels I found in Alice's cabinets, I would enjoy his reactions to the more "Mature" scene as I explained them in the cheesiest naughty expressions. Just picturing his laughing face, how beautiful he looked at the soft sea breeze would stir his soft hair as he grabbed the book off me and leaned in to kiss me.
I sighed in awe; he truly was perfect and caring in every way. I knew I didn't deserve such a person.
I heard dad's fake cough which woke me out of my fantasy trance. He had his usual knowing glare on his face.
Sorry, I got… carried away I thought, apologising to him.
He weakly smiled and rubbed his temples probably thinking "I'm in for some day".
His face composed into a genuine smile as he read my thoughts.
'Sorry to say, but we're here' Alice said in her-as much as she tried-normal tone.
I nearly jumped out of my seat. After all this thinking about Jake now I couldn't wait to see him, marry him, kiss him, dance with him and… the honeymoon.
A big smile lit up my face as Alice opened the door and climbed out leaving the door open so I could and everyone else also.
The soft breeze calmed me even more as I glanced at the crowd around the cliff, I could hear laughing and talking from the Cliff, people were already getting into their seats.
'This way, Nessie we don't want you to get seen by the groom' Alice lightly grabbed my hand and pulled me into a four pitch tent.
'Alice, when did this get here?' I asked looking around the big tent; it had appliances to make tea and had a small table and chairs.
She was peeping out the tent as she answered 'I asked Emmet and Jasper to do it for me, just in case you were nervous a cup of tea would help, and also a place to sit. It also works to cover you from the guests' she winked slightly at me before returning to her position of gawking out the tent.
I sat on the chair which seemed to fancy for this tent 'Alice, thanks for all this it's beautiful'
'I had a vision that today would be a great day for the wedding and that's why I pushed the dates from next month to this month' Alice glided over to sit next to me while still keeping an ear for any salute to go.
'Where's the reception going to be held?' I asked, I still didn't know much about Alice's wacko ideas-number one because she never even thought to tell me about it in the first place.
Alice giggled probably thinking the same as me 'Well, if the weather was going to be bad which is an almost yes since it's winter and all it would have been held at home but besides the fact that half Sam's pack and…*cough* Leah don't like our house we hoped it would be sunny so we'd be able to have it on the beach, which is great because this is La Push, Washington we're talking about'
'Oh, so it's going to be held on First beach?' I asked as she sat up in her chair probably hearing something.
I however, was too addled with thoughts that I didn't have time to track down certain sounds at the moment.
Alice looked at me and smiled 'A duh! The Cliff is over looking it for crying out loud!' she tapped her head as if to say I was stupid.
'Right, I guess that would work' I placed the bouquet on the table in case my shaky hands would let go of them.
Alice got up and danced over to me, just slightly kneeling in front of me so she could place her palm on my cheek-which I usually do to project my thoughts. 'You will love it, full stop. Everything you had told me you liked to have and what Jake did I combined them perfectly like a gene'
I gagged 'Alice, that's not very…'
She giggled and hopped back on her feet gracefully 'I know, I just thought you'd get a laugh'
'Epic fail'
'Well, at least I tried doesn't that score me brownie points?' Alice asked sweetly as if she cared what I thought about her "joke".
'Okay, I'll add three'
'Yay! I win' she jumped up and down delighted with herself.
I couldn't help but laugh at her 'Alice, for some reason you always lighten the mood besides Jasper'
'That adds five more points so that leaves me four more than your fiancé' Alice clapped her hands and tried to laugh evilly which was pretty hilarious considering she was such an adorable person.
'Alice we started that game when I had the appearance of a three year old and wanted the most attention' I explained to a giddy Alice
She stopped and let her bird mouth pop open 'What? You still are, sweetie'
I bit my lip a little 'Do you think Jake thinks the same?'
Alice nearly choked 'What? No way, if he crept into your bedroom each night just to "snuggle" then I don't think so'
I went red just thinking about us "snuggling" on our honeymoon. The honeymoon, I can't wait I mean its Switzerland after all. Beautiful, warm and outstanding in the summer and an absolute wonderland in the winter. All I heard was Alice had planned on sending us to the Medieval style inspired mansion almost palace her friend Joliette who had high hopes for Switzerland and had built only recently but didn't know what to do with it yet. It was supposed to over look the big city of Luzern which was overlooked the beautiful lake of Lucerne.
'Alice, the honeymoon resort is it nice?' I asked fixing my dress before looking up to her.
A smooth giggled smile appeared on her pale face 'You'll love it; I have a whole two weeks planned out for you. I'm talking about skiing, hiking, mountain climbing, camping, steaming, shopping, relaxing, more shopping, eating, relaxing, a little bit of the lovin' now and then, and boom your two weeks are up' Alice's eyes lit up as she only explained to me about it, her hands moving everywhere in the air as she gestured how big and long the places were.
I acted as if I didn't know about the resort at all 'so… it's somewhere in the Alps?'
She gulped 'M-maybe'
'Where, come on Alice gimme clues' I nearly begged even though I already knew where we were going anyway.
She crossed her arms 'Fine, this better add more points… I was thinking Switzerland and the sorts…'
'Switzerland? Why?' I acted not impressed where really I was jumping out of my bones that know that she told me the dream was coming true. I had never been away from America. I had been to New York, California, Mexico City etc on shopping trips Alice sometimes only sent me and Jake's pack as Alice couldn't be seen in daylight especially in Cali for crying out loud.
'What? Switzerland is amazing, gorgeous skiing resorts, romantic cottages near the slopes, imagine you and your newlywed just relaxing by the fire place snuggled up and watching a romantic movie together?' Alice smiled knowing that if I wasn't convinced I was now.
'I'm not one for soppy movies' I added just to see her reaction.
She threw me a sly look 'what about Jakey-Wakey, I bet he'd like to watch some smoochy movies'
I felt like bursting out laughing when Alice copied my voice to a tee when I was younger and called Jake by Jakey-Wakey just to see him smile. 'He doesn't either'
'Hmm… well after a night ALONE with you I'd bet he'd just about love them' Alice really dragged out the "alone" part just to get on my nerves or make me excited.
Alice stopped her messing about and stood still, eyes open wide and hands still.
After a moment she blinked and looked back to normal again, she looked at me 'Time to be getting ready, the reverend is nearly finish preparing his things for the ceremony'
I sighed and looked down 'I hoped Old Quil would have married us but I guess no one can stop illness, right?'
'Don't worry, I had a vision last week that he'd be discharged next week' Alice smiled reassuringly and tugged gently on my wrist to get me up. When I say gently I mean "thank god, I am half vampire because if I was just human she would have dislocated my arm" kind of way.
'Okay, thanks Alice' I smiled weakly as Dad graced us with his usual unsure smile.
'You ready, Ness?' He came to my side and gestured to the white light coming from the opening he came in from.
'Is he out there?' I asked dad, him knowing who I was asking for.
Dad nodded 'and he's looking pretty… eloquent' dad tried to complement him.
I smiled at his words,
Does he look hot? I asked him mentally.
Dad coughed alarmingly 'what did I say, Ness?'
Sorry… I replied silently.
Alice looking confused as per usual like anyone who surrounds us when we are mental talking.
Esme appeared in the tent 'Everything okay here? I just checked around and everyone is here and Clair is set that she has nothing to say besides throw flower petals on the ground'
Dad nodded – 'Is Nessie ready?' Esme asked looking between me and dad as she spoke.
I inhaled again and nodded, not having the voice to speak at the moment. So instead I just remembered my vows over and over.
'Nessie… please, for your father's sake' Dad whispered his eyes squeezed shut.
'Sorry…' I whispered back, I knew by the way I was violently roaring the vows in my head that dad-if he was able to-would definitely have a soar head by now.
Suddenly mom appeared with her sweet smiled plastered on her pretty face 'Is my baby okay?' she spoke whilst leaning in to hug me.
I accepted her hug and tightened my grip; just thinking about being separated made another lump form in my throat. 'I'm fine momma, thanks' I whispered into her hair
'Don't be afraid okay darling, its Jacob your… soul-mate, best friend… big brother even. Just look at him when you are walking up the aisle, I did that and it really numbed the nerves. Believe me' Mom pulled back to talk to me
I nodded taking her advise wisely, hopefully that would also numb my nerves. Sure, I felt fine now but when I walk down the aisle in front of all those people imagine how crazy my mind will be going?
'The reverend is ready' Alice spoke lower than usual probably hoping not to be a "ruiner" of good moments.
'Ready?' everyone asked in unison towards me.
I smiled weakly 'Yes, definitely'
Sneak Peak of;
Chapter Two...
I felt self conscious, like it wasn't me getting married but a more prettier and talented person. Unlike Jake who was perfect, I didn't deserve him.
Alice practically danced down the aisle which probably would have made most of the guests including the coven's contacted-Alice forced them to wear contacts as humans were also attending-eyes popped.
I watched Serrah nervously look back to me, I smiled to calm her. She is spontaneous yes, but she hates walking in front of what she calls "prissy" people especially at weddings.
Lucy winked and smiled at me before straightening her face to a strict smile and almost waltzed down the carpet.
'This is it' Dad whispered coolly into my ear before stepping in front of me to pull my veil carefully over my face and hang over my crossed arms.
I looked up and smiled 'Okay then'
'After you, dear' he spoke in his old fashioned tone as he gave me his arm to wrap my in.
I did just that and before we knew it Mendelssohn's wedding March was being played.
Thanks for reading everybody! REMEBER the more reviews the more chapters are posted. Thank you so much. BTW you gotta know I'm a review junkie, please review!
hehe, tanx so far for all the support and reviews! I am really happy and appreciate it so much! =]
~Isabelle
