"Mr. Cassadine your pilot called and the flight is cleared to Port Charles whenever you arrive."
"Thank you, Bernadea. I shall leave presently," Nikolas answers absently as he stuffs folders into his laptop case. "Damn," he curses, dropping his planner case and two files.
Bernadea drops to the floor and helps him pick-up the files. She grabs the planner and shuts it, but not before noticing the photo of a beautiful brunette inside, one she does not recognize as Mr. Cassadine's deceased wife, Emily. She believes she has found the reason for Mr. Cassadine's distraction this trip, he has a new woman in his life. Ynez, Bernadea's assistant will be greatly disappointed.
"I'll take that," Nikolas barks, taking the planner roughly from Bernadea. He hurries to the door but pauses, "Please accept my apologies for being so rude. As always, you have made this visit smooth and successful. I shall call about the Dubai deal in the next few days. Le merci et jusqu'à la fois suivante."
"Au revoir," Bernadea calls after him as he leaves the Paris office.
On the flight home, Nikolas tries to review the multi-million dollar contract before him. While the meeting with the Shamar's had seemingly gone off without a hitch Nikolas knows that most of the time he wasn't thinking about the business deal, he remembers little of the negotiation. Without Bernadea's able assistance, Cassadine Industries would be looking at a large capital loss instead of the gains it will be receiving over the life of the deal.
Unable to concentrate he opens his planner and pulls out Elizabeth's picture. He thinks of what Elizabeth said during the group therapy session, that while she was with him she felt like she was outside herself, watching someone....., he ends the thought with the word seductive. She didn't use that word but he's sure that was what she was thinking. It was either seductive or destructive, but to Elizabeth they are one and the same. He knows that the passion they experience together is raw and something new for the both of them. It scares him too.
He's given up all of himself for a woman before, for Emily, and the recovery was not easy. If it hadn't been for his friendship with Elizabeth and for Spence he would have ended his life to be with her. To turn his life and happiness over to Elizabeth, his best friend is not easy for him, his pride fights it. At the same time his pride won't allow him to walk away. She wouldn't let him leave her, she said she loves him, he knows she felt more passionate in his arms than Lucky has ever managed to bring out in her. She told him so, she isn't in love with Lucky anymore. He's an ideal she wants to live up too, she doesn't need to be an ideal with Nikolas. He loves her as she is.
She was cruel, saying the Cassadine money is cursed. Elizabeth knows how to hurt him more than anyone else, she went for his juggler. He almost didn't go to the therapy session but if he could help her, he had to attend. When she said she deserved to lose both of them he forgave her. Her feelings of unworthiness are ones he can understand, she has struggled with it her entire life. He wishes she could see herself through his eyes, so beautiful and wise, fiery when riled and very protective of her family. She is a good and loving mother, a canny business woman, he meant it the day he told her he would work with her, but would fear being in business against her. She is never boring, but always surprises.
He wants the baby to be his, as a way to stay connected with her but also because having children with her seems right. He wishes Spence had a mother like her. Spence suffered from Emily's loss too. Nikolas doesn't feel so out of place when Elizabeth is there with him and Spence, she shows him how to act around his son. He knows she wants the baby to be Lucky's, it would be 'easier'.
For now Nikolas's life is on hold, he waits the results of the paternity test and the results of Elizabeth's therapy. Two things he has no control over. Waiting is all he can do, well that and plan.
"Mr Cassadine, we are one hour from Port Charles," he hears over the airplane speakers. Nikolas picks up the secure phone and calls Alfred. "Please see if Audrey is fine with a play date for the boys. I will pick-up Spence there." There is no way to get used to children faster then spending time with them, as he can't be with Elizabeth he might as well spend time with his son and nephews. They might even teach him something about hope.
