Prologue
It was a dark and stormy night.
Suddenly, a shot rang out! A maid screamed. A door slammed. A man jumped on the table and started to polka.
"Polka polka polka party!!" He screamed.
Suddenly, a dark, hooded figure appeared in the doorway! Everybody turned their attention to him. He was as tall as a kid, with his face and hands hidden from view by his travel stained cloak.
He slowly approached the middle of the room. Suddenly, he threw back his hood and said:
"Where's the polka party? What? It's over?? Aww...".
A pirate ship loomed on the horizon...
To clear a misconceptions
To clear up any misconceptions, prologues usually have nothing to do with the book. Right? Well neither did this one. (Yes that's my opinion I hate prologues)
BIO ON MAIN CHARECHTERS
NAME: Isaiah (I-say-ah) Chmit
LIKES: MR.noodles (especially curry chicken flavor)
DISLIKES: soggy noodles
GENDER: male
AGE: 12
INFO: has a brother named Gibu also his rival, his best friend name is Itat
NAME: Itat (eetat) (his last name is unknown)
LIKES: Allot of things
DISLIKES: Tattle tales
GENDER: Male
AGE: 12
INFO: Isaiah's best friend
Chapter 1 (finally): ninja school
Out in the middle of nowhere surrounded by forest the sat a lone building the ninja academy.
it was a hitech ninja training facility for ninja that show extraordinary talent or a really big wallet.
this story is not about this ninja academy it is about a small ninja school
in a small town in the vacinity of konoha.
this book isn't exactly about the school but actually two small boys at the school.
it starts on a fine summers day while our two young heroes are trying to dodge responsibility.
"Hee hee hee they'll never find us here" whispered Itat
"sh I think someone's coming" muttered Isaiah
Teacher guy "I wonder where they could be"
"hee hee" laughed Itat
"Shut up Itat" whispered Isaiah
"Well look what we have here"
"Uh oh" said Itat and Isaiah at the same time
"You can't hide from me" said teacher guy proudly
"This is all your fault Itat it was your idea to skip class" said Isaiah
"Well you didn't have to come and your talking gave us away" said Itat
"My talking? your the one who kept laughing" said Isaiah
"it's both your fault so that's why you both have to stay after school for detention" declared teacher guy
"NOOOO!!!!" yelled Itat
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhHHHHHH" yelled Isaiah (that is where he gets his name)
Chapter 2: detention
Later that day:
Ding ding ding "well theirs the bell class dismissed" said theater guy
"Now's our chance to skip detention" Itat whispered in Isaiah's ear
"yah" replied Isaiah
so they calmly stood up and slipped towards the door
"where are you going?" said teacher guy
"um home" said Itat
"oh ok" is the answer that they wanted to hear but what it really was was this
"no you don't" said teacher guy angrily "don't try to deceive me"
"now lets start by reviewing the lesson you skipped on the art of transformation
step one focus on the person or thing that you want to turn into then you make the hand signal and release your chacrha. now Itat since I hear it was your idea to skip class you go first" said teacher guy
"Fine" grumbled Itat with a distasteful glance at Isaiah before proceeding to the front of the room
"Transform" said Itat while making the proper hand signal turning into a perfect copy of teacher guy.
"Good job I see you have already had previous training with this technique. Where though?" asked teacher guy
"Well when me and Isaiah where younger his brother would always show of his skills so me and Isaiah watched him and learned a thing or two about doppleganger, transformation and manipulating charcra throughout our bodies"
Said Itat
Teacher guys thaghts"wow he got that good at transformation just by watching someone else and he said some thing about manipulating his chakra that's very advanced and all that just by watching someone show off he must be gifted"
"Change of plans take these notes to your parents/guardian" exlamed teacher guy
suddenly Itat pipes in "what if I don't have parents/guardians because if I did the writer of the book would have a reason to not give me a last name because he can't come up with any more at the moment as you can tell by your own name teacher guy"
"Very well just give it to Isaiah's parents" answered teacher guy "now good by"
Chapter 3: strange letters
On the way to Isaiah's house Itat was lost in thought "I wonder what the letter is about" said Itat
"Don't know" said Isaiah "but where did you come up with the whole chakra control story he actually believed it"
"I know" said Itat "I was just making things up out of no where. I wonder if you really can control chakra like I said?"
"Maybe" said Isaiah "but how did you get so good at the art of transformation?"
"I didn't lie about that part" said Itat "I learnt it by spying on higher grade classes two years ago"
"Oh" said Isaiah "by the way can you show me how to transform properly? I'm no good"
"Weren't you paying attention to the teacher? Anyway first you make the hand sign then you focus your chakra and realize it after concentrating on what you want to turn into. Observe"
Not so suddenly out of somewhere with allot of warning Itat turned into a oversized novelty item foam hand that has a big #1 on it.
"Wow!" Isaiah exclaimed "that's cool! Now it's my turn!"
Isaiah made the hand sign then suddenly turned into a not so perfect bowl of ramen (which wasn't so perfect as I said before it looked more like a plate of ramen that still looked more like a bowl than a plate and the ramen looked more like a cheese burger that looked more like a bowl of ramen than a cheese burger)
"If you keep trying you may be able to do it properly some day" said Itat after they where done with transforming they kept walking down the street in the direction of Isaiah's house when Itat saw an advertisement that caught his eye through a glass window on a TV commercial that went like this "are you a perpetual failure of a ninja? Do you need a new secret weapon? Well we have the perfect product for you! The first five people to buy something from our store will be entered in a draw to win this fantastic new item!"
"Hey Isaiah just wait here a minute I'll be right back" said Itat "oh and by the way do you have any money?"
"ya. but what do you need it for?" replied/asked Isaiah
"to buy something what else would I need it for, to stare at?!! Itat replied to the reply of Isaiah
"oh" replied Isaiah to the reply of Itat at the well you get the point already
"so how much money do you have?" asked Itat "I have about 1.25$" answered Isaiah
"So I can have it"? Asked Itat
"On one condition" replied Isaiah
"What"? Asked Itat
"You have to pay me double tomorrow" replied Isaiah
"Fine just give me the money" begged Itat
"Ok here you go" said Isaiah
"Thanks" said Itat
so after reciting the money Itat bolted for the door to the shop determined to win the draw.
"Hello do you have any thing for 1.25$" said Itat
Not so Chapter 1: the chapter that has nothing to do with any thing
This chapter has nothing to do with any thing as stated in the title above. Suddenly Joe started to laugh maniacally "mwhahahahaahabwhahahahahabwahahahahahhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahateeteeteehee"
suddenly the Calvary charged the castle and monkeys that are made of rubber ate a fuzzy pickle and drank tea through it's nose while writing the script for shackspher as aristocratic apples where ate by apes on airplanes in Africa while attaching armor to aggravated boars and my plan to lose wait is: to day I kill he boar eh baby boar eh a boar in armor (all said in a cheesy French ascent) and also swallow a hoard of starving anchovies with a side of fries served with a side of cooked rubber monkey stuffed with fuzzy piccolos that died shortly after composing Beethoven's 9th symphony I can't I said I can't hi hi the lemon is in the gold plated brick being smashed over my head once upon a wedge a guy died uyioouimntefbgy is a weird word even though it isn't a word./';,;
Chapter 4: introducing the pyromaniac that doesn't have any thing to do with the story (yet)
Bio
name: Oryp Cainam (pronounced Oryp Cainam)
likes:fire
dislikes:water
gender:male
Info: a young pyromaniac ninja who is very skilled in the way of fire and has split personalities one that's serious and one that just wants to light things on fire
Oryp the young ninja from some village of fire on his graduating year received a letter Reading the following
Dear graduate
we ask if you would like to be a foreign exchange student to konoha village (the village hidden in the leafs)
from principle of kanoha village ninja school
Ps. to get further info please phone 811-2341
this is his response
reply
from Oryp
village hidden in leafs eh that means trees to burn. sure I accept.
to principal guy
Continuation Chapter 4
As Itat and Isaiah entered Isaiah's house something strange happened- nothing "that's weird" said Isaiah "I thought some thing strange would happen"
"Well maybe the writer was just trying to make it interesting" said me (the writer)
"Hey you're the writer" said Itat "get him"
"uh oh" said me "bye" suddenly I disappeared in a puff of spinach
"that was strange" said Isaiah "why were you attacking him?"
"Because something strange had to happen" said Itat "why else?"
"Okay" said Isaiah "mom I'm home!"
"Just a second" called back Isaiah's mom "coming"
"Hi Mrs. Chmit" said Itat
"Hi Itat" said Isaiah's mom
"Here me and Itat got a letter for you" said Isaiah
"Ok and by the way where did all that spinach come from" said Isaiah's mom
"Just ignore it" said Itat
"Ok well you and Isaiah go play out side or something I have to make supper oh Itat do you want to stay for supper?" said/asked Isaiah's mom
"Sure" said Itat
Later that night after supper Itat and Isaiah where siting at the supper table and suddenly remembered the strange letters
"Oh I just remembered the strange letters we got should we open them? "Said Itat
So they opened the letters the following is what the envelope contained
Dear recipients
For some reason if you are reading this letter you have bean chosen to graduate early congratulations
From school board of ninjas
"Wow" said everybody at or close to the same time
Chapter 5: graduation day!!!!!!!!!!!
(This is the part of the story where Oryp comes in)
"Congratulation (and good riddance)" said teacher guy "oh and by the way for your three man squad we had to get a foreign exchange student because the class was an impossible number to divide by three but because of you we needed one more graduate so we borrower a spare from the some fire village his name is Oryp" said teacher guy
"Hi" said Oryp
"Hi" replied Itat and Isaiah
"Any way I have class to teach so I'll go now your new teacher's will come soon" said teacher guy as he walked out of the door
Now I the writer must think long and hard on some wired and funny name for the new character hmm hum ER what could it be what could it be pasta its some sort of noodle (refer thy self to bobobo-bobo-bobo chapter 1 page 16 by shonen jump (funniest manga ever you must buy and read now or forever be doomed to the horrid fate of BOREDOM! MUAHAHAHAHAHA (actually the name isn't spaghetti)))
"Hello IM your new teacher master pasta" said pasta "according to this info you two are gifted and where boosted ahead two grades and you are a fire ninja and the top of your class two so tell me why did you get boosted ahead two grades"
So Itat and Isaiah explained every thing including how it was a mistake
"hmm very interesting" said pasta " so you relay are talentless well lets get training then"
"so your not going to tell teacher guy?" asked Itat
"No I hate him we're rivals" replied pasta
(I'm in a creative slump so I'm ending this chapter short)
Chapter 6: Training
(Note I'm still in a creative slump because I'm used to siting on my bed and writing but my brother is siting on it to play my gameboy (I don't have the time or will to explain the story of how the mouse on the laptop broke and he tried to fix it but couldn't so he just lay on my bed playing my gameboy instead oh never mind he got of))
"So when are we going to start training?" asked Itat
"Right away" replied pasta "just as soon as I eat lunch"
So they sat down and got some lunch from the cafeteria
The special was pasta so they got that suddenly pasta noticed he was eating himself and puked then Oryp, Itat and Isaiah noticed they where eating the master and puked then teacher guy noticed he was eating his rival and smiled (what can't I have one ER, three crappy puns about pasta)
"Ok now well train" said pasta "to the training field"
"Ok where here. Before we begin any questions" asked pasta "yes Itat"
"How'd we get hear in one second and what are we doing for training?" asked Itat
"For your first question I don't have a clue and for training we're going to try and find your strengths and weaknesses" replied pasta "any more questions"
"Yes" said Oryp "can I go catch something on fire cause I'm bored" "fine go knock your self out" replied pasta
"Thanks" said Oryp as he ran of in the direction of the nearest tree
"Any ways let's begin with a exercise to test the amount of chakra you posses
First you know how you call upon your chakra to make dopplegangers and such well what you do is call on it but not use it for any thing got it? Ok begin" said pasta with out stopping for a breath resulting in almost fainting
It looked like it started out even but then Isaiah started to get tired and in the end Itat won by allot (hmm that Itat has a abnormal amount of chakra better remember that) thought pasta
"Ha ha I beat you Isaiah" said Itat
"I don't care" replied Isaiah
"stop fighting" said pasta "now I will use my immense intellectual powers to deiced which is a better fighter. eny meny miny mo catch a ninja by the tow if he beats you up let him go eny meny miny mo"
"I now what your thinking what's a ninja master doing eniy miny mieny mo even if it his own version? Well stop thinking then!!" said me after appearing out of no where
"Look the author get him!!!" yelled Itat
"not again! Bye" said me before disappearing in a puff of spinach
"What's with the spinach?" asked Isaiah
"I don't know I don't know" replied pasta
"Well then what should we do with all it?" said Itat "every time I chase him of we get more"
"I'll deal with it hehehehebwhahahahamwahahahahhatehe" said pasta while imagining ringing teacher guys door bell then running of and leaving a mountain of spinach for him to step in.
"Wow what a brave man taking on a mountain of spinach all allows," said Isaiah
"a moment of silence... Ok moment over"
"Oh and by the way the winner is Isaiah" declares pasta "now that we know witch is a better physical fighter and which is a better tactical user person so I what both of you to go and train those skills and meat back hear in three days"
"But shouldn't we try to get better with the stuff we are worse with first?" asked Isaiah
"Not really you should get better at what your best at to some extent cause it will make things easier on hard missions" replied pasta" but I have to go get Oryp by"
"See you in three days" said Itat
"By" said Isaiah
Short story: ninja food fight!!!
(this chapter does not have any thing to do with the book)
"food fight!!!" yells ninja 1 (ninja 1 being the mane character of this short story)
Suddenly all the ninjas in the cafeteria start throwing food around and using carrots as kaunai knives or burgers as shuriken and other various food articles as weapons ninja 1 grabbed a hand full of carrots putting one between each finger throwing eight at once an started throwing them at random passerbys then. Then he saw a ninja running to get a teacher so he grabbed five sausage's and tied them together then he threw them at some guys legs raping around and tripping him then ninja 1 ran over and picked up the tripped guy and used him as a human shield to block food being throne at him then he grabbed a particularly mushy tomato and threw it right at the head of some other guy right as he ducked and it flew over his head and at the same moment as a teacher walked threw the door and the tomato hit him right in the face splattering all over him suddenly all the ninja in the room pointed at ninja 1
The end
Chapter 7: Itat's training
day 1:
early the next morning Itat awoke and then thought to him self "let me see I need to train my chakra. but how? oh I know today I'll go to the library and get some scrolls on chakra consuming techniques then tomorrow I'll just keep practicing them"
"to the library" declared Itat as he jumped out of bed "away"
(but first he ate breakfast)
later that day at library
"excuse me" Itat said to the librarian "where are your scrolls on chakra consuming techniques?"
"it's over there" said the librarian not looking and just pointing in a random direction without looking up
"thanks" replied Itat
then Itat walked over to the closest bookshelf grabbed five scrolls and left
(what Itat didn't notice was that he went to the advanced section)
later that day at Itat's house
"oh great" said Itat to him self "I grabbed the wrong scrolls oh well they'll have to do"
so Itat spread them out on the floor and started to read them
"hmm lets see" Itat thought "hay these scrolls say you can manipulate chakra though objects to control them cool and you can also send it through your body to make your fist super strong or sticky for climbing I guess I'll start with the first one but with what?"
just as Itat stopped thinking to him self he sneezed making boogers go every where that gave him a idea a gross disgustingly good idea(the other three scrolls where just 2 scrolls of lists of techniques how to use them and what they are for and the other scroll was exercises to get better at controlling chakra)
day 2:
day 2 was spent practicing the new disgusting technique and various others
day 3:
day 3 is a story for another chapter (if you think I'm just doing this because I'm out of ideas and it's only chapter 7 well... your absolutely right)
The not so chapter 2: the very short chapter where I explain about some thing
in chapter 3 strange letters the unexplained prize item was a shovel that is unbreakable (or at least that's what they say). Itat one the draw (as the stores only customer)
Chapter 8: Isaiah's training
later that day (the graduation day) as soon as Isaiah walked through the door of his house his parents jumped out of no where and yelled "surprise!!!"
"hi" said Isaiah's older gifted brother named Gibu
"a party! for me! wow I really deserve it!" says Isaiah sarcastically "I don't want to graduate early" (in a bad mood just because I'm righting this chapter at 9:46 at night and am tired but just want to finish the next sentence or two)
"see I new he was a fraud" (like cheese) said Gibu "he deserves to go to jail"
"stop fighting or I'll send both of you to a orphanage" said Isaiah's mom suddenly jumping up and resorting to extreme physical violence
(suddenly every body happy)
"I know this is the best day of my life" said Isaiah happily
"good job little bro." said Gibu
"let's celebrate with a party" said Isaiah's mom
"this is crazy" thinks Isaiah's dad
thus they partied on into the night
"party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party party" chanted every body at once all night
day 1:
was later remembered as a blurry haze but it is said to have been spent sleeping and having a root beer induced hang over
day 2 (of training):
Isaiah woke up the next day at 9:30 am his parents had already left for work and his brother was of on important ninja business so Isaiah made breakfast and because he couldn't think of how to train and what to train so he went fore a walk to get some fresh air to clear his mind
"every thing that happened to me this past while has been a accident like graduating early and the eniey miny miny mo thing" thought Isaiah to him self "I'm a terrible ninja I'm no good at chakra control and or fighting I only one because master pastas intellectual powers are a fraud (like cheese) and it was all random. maybe I should read this random book of fighting stiles that is ling on the ground"
Then Isaiah went home and studied long and hard finally finding two fighting technique he liked one called the art of the chicken which is a combination of jabbing people with his fingers, head butting and running around with your thumbs in your arm pits and clucking and waking people in the face with your "wings"
It also includes other holism things such as being a horrible coward and running very fast the second one called the art of the rubber animal where you whack things with rubber animals.
day 3:
day 3 is a story for another chapter (sorry for repeating this but if you think I'm just doing this because I'm out of ideas and it's only chapter 8 well... your absolutely right)
Not so chapter 3: the elusive day three
narrator: this is the story of the mysterious day three!!! dannhaanhaanah
director/writer/author/me: hay chinch when was this a narrative???
narrator: got to go now. bye! and don't forget to eat your greens!!!
director/writer/author/me: forget this ever happened it was all a figment of your imagination.
"apple."
"shut up narrator"
narrator: ow the pain the misery
Chapter 9: the real story of the elusive day 3 (with no narrators!!)
(To tell the truth yet again I'm in a creative slump and decided that my original idea for day 3 sucked so I'm going to leave that part for later and just talked about Oryp and pasta for now)
"Now that should keep them busy for now" thought pasta "where'd Oryp go?"
So off went pasta to find Oryp.
When he finally found Oryp was lying on the ground surrounded by burnt tree stumps
"When I told him to nock him self out he took it literally I see" thought pasta " well I better get him back to the house"
(Oryp is staying with pasta well he's in konoha and I think I'm out of my creative slump so I'm suddenly going to switch to day three)
The story of day three:
"YAWN" yawed Isaiah "what day is it?" he thought to himself "oh ya it's my last day of the three day training period thing. I think at least I'll check this random calendar that appeared out of now where. Let's see yep it's the last day of the three day training thing oh and it's also the county fair apple sauce day I should go get some... But what's a county fair?"
later that day on the way to the county fair:
"Hey look it's Itat" thought Isaiah "hi Itat are you going to the county fair to"
"yep" replied Itat "but why are you going I thought you hated apples? wait I hate apples."
"Oh ya I forgot" said Isaiah "oh well where already there let's go any where"
"Okay" replied Itat "I wonder where that author is though he's getting annoying"
"Eep" said the author (me)
Then both Itat and Isaiah turned around and saw a pile of spinach
"oh well he's gone let's go get the apple sauce guy then" said Itat "charge"
So on they ran into the county fair never to be seen again (just kidding there seen again it turns out all the county fair was is a apple sauce stand)
"What is a county fair any way?" asked Isaiah to the air
"Hey you apple sauce guy where here to complain!" said Itat
"Ya and what's a county fair any way" asked Isaiah
"Oh no my imaginary secrets out what will I do?" thought apple sauce guy
Suddenly apple sauce guy ripped of a mask
Chapter 10: count applesmimer
"You'll never defeat me for I'm Count applesmimer of the ninjas hidden in the county fair
"...okay" said Itat
"Now to beat you up because you now my secret identity mwhahahah" said Count Applesmimer
"you'll never win we have team work" said Isaiah
"ya team work" said Itat
"let's see" replied Count Applesmimer
Suddenly Count Applesmimer puled out an excessively large jar of applesauce pulled of the lid and started firing it like a bazooka it launched out over sized apples that had fuses for stems and exploded on impact.
"Super secret technique of the ninjas hidden in the county fair death apple bomb bazooka," yelled Count Applesmimer
"Ahhhhhh" screamed Isaiah as a apple zoomed right past his head exploding a bench right be hind him (the county fair was set up in a park)
"Let's use are super team work to beat him," said Isaiah
"right" agreed Itat
"TEAM WORK THEQNIQE ITAT CANON!" Isaiah yelled well picked up Itat and started spinning him around then letting go of him and launching him at the count
"Hay this wasn't part of the plane stop it no hay ahhhhhh" protested Itat well flying threw the air
"You think that will work on me," said the count well dogging the Itat projectile causing Itat to fly out of the park and crashing into a Dumpster
"Your evil" Isaiah said
"And I'm Proud of it" replied the count "now die" bang bang bang
"Ahhhhhh" yelled Isaiah well barley dogging more apple bombs
"Oh great out of bullets" said the count "oh well" he said well puling out two punching gloves shaped like bomb apples "I'll just use my bomb gloves the harder I punch the bigger the explosion"
"Uhoh" said Isaiah as he ran away "I have to go get my dry cleaning. By" suddenly Isaiah tripped
"I have you now. Say good b" said the count before suddenly stopping in the middle of his sentence then falling forward with a big greenish yellow splat on the back of his head. Then Isaiah fainted.
Isaiah came to four hours later when he woke up he was in a hospital
"You finally woke up. why'd you faint? asked Itat
"I don't know probably because I thought I was going to die" replied Isaiah "oh and what happened after I fainted"
"Well cinch you passed out after you tripped the count walked over and right before he punched you I hit him in the back of the head with a chacara powered double barreled shotgun snot gun (a technique made by Itat)
Which knocked him out int'l the police arrived it turns out count Applesmimer was wanted for selling illegal apple sauce made of strawberries so since we chaght him we got his bounty which by the way was only 5 dollars so then we came here but since you only fainted from shock we can leave now" said Itat
"Ok but hand over the money first" replied Isaiah
"why" asked Itat
"Because of the money you borrowed had interest so now you ow me about 5 dollars" replied Isaiah
"fine" said Itat
then Itat and Isaiah left the hospital and went home.
"Well by Itat see you tomorrow at the training field" said Isaiah
"ya by" replied Itat well waving and walking away.
Chapter 11: test
back at the training grounds the next day:
"So now are you confident with your skills?" asked pasta
"yes" replied Isaiah
"yep" replied Itat
"All ways was" replied Oryp
"Ok then before our first mission I just noticed I never really tested you to see if your worthy of me to train you" said pasta "so the last three days may have bin a waste of time "
"What" yelled Itat and Isaiah at the same time
"Don't worry the last three days actually helped if I had tested you three days ago you probably would have failed. So I'll just test you now" pasta "this is how the test works I'll make three solid (shadow) dopplegangers of me one four each of you the goal is to catch your doppleganger. any questions no ok"
Then master pasta made three shadow dopplegangers, which ran of in three different directions one towards a forest training section. One towards a rocky plain training section. And one to the cafeteria?
"Your not supposed to go that way! Oh whatever." pasta yelled at the doppleganger "any ways Itat you go after the one in the plains Oryp you get the one in the forest and Isaiah you get the cafeteria. Go!"
So the three young ninja ran off in search of the dopplegangers. But little did they know that……… absolutely nothing would happen!!! (other than the following)
Oryp in the forest area:
"yay forest that means I can burn things! Wait no first I must catch the doppleganger. But the trees. Do it me. But. Do it or else. Ok ok I'm going.," thought Oryp (split personalities) "so what to do hmm I know I'll dig a pit fill it with wooden stakes and cover it with tree leaves and when he goes to get this golden turkey I'll put in it he'll fall in and die mwhahahahahaha. One thing me. What? One you don't have a shovel two that's a waste of a turkey. Then what's your plan mister smart pants well I say we just go find him and tie him up. Then where is he? Ok then I have another plan why don't we just burn the forest so he can't hide then we tie him up. I like the way I think me lets do it."
Then Oryp ran of in a puff of self-agreement to find dry kindling for his "little fire"
Itat on the plain type training grounds:
"Yes the plains theirs no where to hide this should be easy," thought Itat "he must be behind that boulder over there"
"Ah ha I chaght ... A cow? Behind a boulder that's weird. Oh ya now I remember I once saw a documentary on the plain dwelling boulder hiding cow" said Itat
(Itat's memory in high definition TV: the plain dwelling boulder boulder hiding cow lives on any plain near a ninja training ground (don't ask why). It eats mostly anything that's green (a word of advice if you live on the plains near a ninja training center don't paint your house green or you may wake up in a p.d.b.h. cows stomach). The p.d.b.h. cow's natural enemy is the tea kettle which unlike the p.d.b.h. Cow the kettle don't live in herds so they only attack cows that have Been separated from the heard first the kettle will role up close to the cow by wearing a disguise like draping a cloth used for picking up boiling tea kettles over there spout and saying there nuns then it springs into action suctioning onto the cows face and pouring sugar less English morning tea down the cows throughout until it can take it no longer and swears alliance to the ninja hiding in the tea factory where they will have there milk extracted to be put in tea that doesn't need it)
"Moo" mooed the cow
"Oh well I am thirsty" said Itat well puling out a: stool, a cup and an authentic straw farmer hat.
A few minuets later:
"That was some good milk," said Itat "now where could that doppleganger be? I looked every where accept... under ground but how would he get there oh well I might as well check" suddenly Itat puled out his shovel jumped in the air twisted so he was facing the ground and went hands first plowing into the earth ("I give him a 7 for jump but a 2 for his entry") then he sped of in search of the sub-terrain doppleganger.
Isaiah in the cafeteria:
"Yes I got the best place the cafeteria there is hardly any where to hide… what he's not here oh well I'll just eat some thing then go find him" thought Isaiah
"What's the special today?" asked Isaiah
"Pasta" replied the cook
"Ok I'll take it," said Isaiah (said Isaiah without thinking)
So Isaiah took the pasta and sat down but when he took a bite he heard "ow" out of no where
"Weird that sounded like pasta" said Isaiah
"Yes it is me and stop chewing on my arm," said pasta
"Hay aren't you that doppleganger I have two catch," asked Isaiah
"By" replied the doppleganger while running for the door
Then Isaiah jumped into action throwing him self between the fake pasta and the door
"Don't move I'm hear to bring you in and pass," said Isaiah
"Bring it on" replied the doppleganger
Suddenly Isaiah puled out six rubber chickens (three in each hand). Then he charged flailing the rubber chickens in front as if to hide behind them if fake pasta retaliated but for some reason Isaiah couldn't land a hit "that's weird I haven't hit yet how can he dodge so much" thought Isaiah
Can Isaiah win? Will he beat Pasta? Tune in next time to find out!
"Stupid narrator get out" Said Author (me)
Narrator: ouch
Oryp in the forest:
"There I have all the kindling," thought Oryp "will you do the honors me? Yes thank you me"
So he pulled out a match and threw it on the kindling
"I think you should light the match first me," thought Oryp "oh"
So he pulled out a match light it and threw it on the kindling
"There now I just wait till it burns to the center where the doppleganger is" thought Oryp " one thing me. What. THERE IS NO EXIT AND WHERE ON THE INSIDE… oh gha I'm going to die faint wake up gha faint"
Doppelganger:
"I smell burning OH NO," thought the doppleganger "I microwaved my burrito to long mmm burrito AH A FIRE"
Faint
Oryp:
"Hay me look over there. Where? There. Oh their where's there? Where we are pointing. Oh. It's the doppleganger," thought Oryp "ok well now I just find a exit and take the fainted doppleganger with me as proof but where is the exit? Hay me make an exit you worthless imbecile. No I'm busy watching the fire you do and get me when I'm done. …………?????? (Confused other personality). Ok lets
Go now"
So Oryp walked over to the doppleganger suddenly he heard a voice
"I'm the ghost of the burrito this guy choked on and from now on I will haunt you. Woo boo," said Al the disembodied burrito
"Oh. Hay look a burrito with a big bit mark if I bit that much of I'd choke" said Oryp well picking up the burrito and shoving it in his pocket
"Hay don't ignore me hay no DON'T SIT DOWN I DON'T WANT TO DIE AGAIN NOOOOOO!!!!" yelled Al
"Now where is that exit" thought Oryp
A few minutes later: (thanks to instant transitional phases)
"Hi pasta I chaght the doppleganger it was a intense epic battle with a blow torch a hippo a frozen pea and a ice pack but I won" lied Oryp
"liar " said pasta
"What do you mean?" asked Oryp
"I mean this doppleganger died by a burrito not you" replied pasta "so you fail unless you still have that burrito do you?"
"Actually I do it was on the ground beside the microwave and three kilometer extension cord hear" said Oryp
"Thank you. Oh and you pass," said pasta after taking the burrito
"Yes thank you' replied Oryp
"ack glek blea" pasta choking on burrito
"I guess the doppleganger was just like him," said Oryp
Itat under the plains:
"Now where could he be" thought Itat "how can I find him? I know I could give up now I'll never find him unless he pop's out of know where."
POP
"Hi" said the doppleganger that had just reconstructed it's self out of thin air
"Hi" said the shocked Itat "hay I'm supposed to catch you right?"
"By" said the doppleganger while tunneling off threw the ground away from Itat
So Itat bolted of after him after a while of running Itat noticed the doppleganger starting to slow down
"He must be getting tired now's my chance" thought Itat while gathering his chakra to his nose so he could shoot a booger at the doppleganger (you do sneeze at 100 mile an hour it's true) then he launched just when the doppleganger was leaning over to catch his breath. But the booger still managed to hit the fake pasta on the elbow throwing him over into the ground. Then Itat walked over so he was standing above the doppleganger and shot one last shot into the back of the doppleganger's head knocking it out.
Isaiah in the cafeteria:
"Why can't I hit him?" thought Isaiah "what a minuet I just hit him but nothing happened"
"I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you? I'm fine how are you?" said a random psychopath hunched up in a corner
"Shut up can't you see we are trying to fight here" said Isaiah
"Ya" said the fake pasta
"……… I'm fine how are you?" replied the random psychopath hunched up in a corner
"????????? Let's ignore him," said Isaiah
"Ok" replied the fake pasta
So ignoring the psychopath the two battled on for about a howl two seconds before Isaiah noticed some thing important.
"Hay" thought Isaiah "I am hitting he just can't feel it he must be wearing armor. Well I could use that technique but he could easily dodge so I should get him in a corner first"
"Hay look a penny," said Isaiah
"I saw it first" said the doppleganger while running into the corner and the trap
"Now's my chance" thought Isaiah
Then Isaiah ran to the corner puled out a five-meter long rubber whale jumped in the air and brought it down on the dopplegangers head knocking it out.
"Now I just have to Cary this shadow doppleganger back to pasta. Away!" said Isaiah
Back at the main ninja training ground meeting place:
"Well I guess you all pass," said pasta sounding discouraged because he didn't want to have work
"Yay we pass go us ya!" yelled Itat
"Don't party yet you have even more work now that you passed you have to do mind dulling boring jobs that are constant and repeating till you get better and pass then you can do better missions" said pasta
"Sound's pain full" said Isaiah
"Painful as in day time television painful or butter knife in the fore head painful" asked Oryp
"No I think he means anvil dropped on your head painful," said Itat
"No I just mean painful you imbecile!" yelled Isaiah
"Any ways to morrow we take are first mission good night," said pasta well jumping away
Chapter 12: Freaks and Geeks
The next day at the meeting place:
"Ok now that every one is hear now the mission we have is to cut my grass and plant some flowers in front of my house ok," said pasta
"That sounds like forced labor," said Oryp
"It is but am I complaining" replied pasta
"I guess your not well. lets get to work," said Isaiah
A few forced labor missions later:
"There it's done," said Oryp while looking up at the mansion that is now pastas house
"Now what is our next mission?" asked Itat
"Well my house is done so now for a real mission," said past
"Real?" said a confused Oryp
"Did I say that? It was just a joke. Now to the ninja recruitment center." Said pasta
"Where there but why when ever you say to some where we appear there?" asked Isaiah
"I don't know" replied pasta "but it dose save time. Now lets see what missions we can do. Ah here is one find a run away dog for "name withheld" lets go"
"Hay a dog. I found it" said Oryp
"That was to easy how about this one" said pasta
Meanwhile:
"What are they doing?" said person 1
"I don't know," said person 3
"Lets attack them" said person 2
"No not yet" said person 1
"But what are they doing?" said person 2
"They seam to be finishing missions without moving" said person 1
"There good to good" said person 3
"Now can we dispose of them?" said person 2
"Ok" said person 3
"Fine with me" said person1
Meanwhile the meanwhile:
"Stop that!" yelled agitated pasta
"Stop what?" asked Oryp
"Stop being so good!" replied pasta
"Why?" asked Oryp
"Because some one or maybe some three ya three people shrouded in mystery and called one two and three could see you and try to kill you and they could say this "What are they doing?" said person 1
"I don't know," said person 3
"Lets attack them" said person 2
"No not yet" said person 1
"But what are they doing?" said person 2
"They seam to be finishing missions without moving" said person 1
"There good to good" said person 3
"Now can we dispose of them?" said person 2
"Ok" said person 3
"Fine with me" said person1" rambled pasta
"Hay look a burrito," said Oryp while ignoring pasta and running away after the burrito
"I'm thirsty," said Itat completely oblivious to the current state of his surroundings "hey milk."
How can you tell where milk is all the time?" asked Isaiah
"I have a six sense of liquid like there is some lemon juice over there" said Itat pointing north
"But it's just a guy with a full bladder in line for the toilet" pointed out Oryp
"What's the difference?" replied Itat
"Hay can you hear that annoying sound it sounds bleak and repetitive just like educational television I must put a end to it" said Isaiah running of towards the sound
"Well this sucks I'm going to checkout my new forced labor built mansion. By" said pasta well running of
Itat:
