Summary: Smith, Neo and a haunted pie factory ? What ever could go horribly right ?

'First person thoughts' , Bold


Pie

Smith looked at the building across the street. The Old Mary Pie Factory, it had been abandoned for years after it got burnt out. Even when he'd been an Agent he hadn't been able to confirm if it was really haunted or not. He looked down at the street and saw his oblivious affection and obsession pacing in front of the factory.

Ah, dearest Neo. The tall, slim and pale skinned black clad form beautiful as ever. He always looked amazing, a sense of power emanated from him or maybe that was just sex appeal. Or maybe it was both ? He liked that option more than the others.

A group of teen Rebels led by the teen called Kid walked up to Neo, or at least Kid did. The others looked too awed to approach the One. They shuffled around embarrassed.

Kid said "Hi, Neo."

An annoyed look crossed the pretty face and Neo growled "What is it Kid ? It better be good. There was no bloody werewolf. "

"But this is different Neo. The old factory's supposed to be haunted by ghosts and a demon."

"Ghosts, demon ?. Kid do I look like a damned priest to you ? "

Kid said sheepishly "Sorta. "

For once he couldn't help but agree with the idiot. Neo in that cassock did look like a priest. Fucking hot one, he could exorcise me anytime. Whenever, where ever.

Neo glared "Rhetorical question, Kid. Now, why should I ? "

"Because we're too terrified to. Cause we're not strong enough, or fast enough. "

"Alright, alright. Shut up - you're sounding like a little creep Kid. If I don't find anything I'm kicking your ass. "

With that Neo turned and ran at the fenced off factory. He jumped, soaring over it and landing in a crouch, he stood and stalked off smooth as anything. Cassock flared gracefully as he walked, he had a really nice ass. Definitely nice. As the human disappeared into the building he jumped over to an adjacent roof and into the yard.


One of the Kids' friends said " You better hope he finds something. He sounded like he really was going to kick your ass. "

Kid sighed "I know he's great isn't he. "

It made him want to jump back over the fence and punch the kid in the face. Or shoot him, or both. No stupid kid was going to steal Neo from him. Neo was his damn it. His.

Slipped into the building after him, it was in even worse shape than the last time he'd seen it. Burned and falling apart, all the lights either didn't work or had been smashed out.

Neo was a few feet ahead, he nearly disappeared in the shadows. He jumped as he kicked a piece of machinery and then he muttered "Why's it smell like pie ? "

We both stopped as something appeared, a human form my vision flickered into code. He could see Neo but he couldn't see the ...ghost. It said "Get out. Before it's too late. Get out. "

It faded away and he could practically feel Neo's shudder. The smell of pie faded and he followed Neo, who walked through the entrance and into the work area.

"This is so creepy. Bloody kid, I'm really gonna kill him after this. Especially if this turns into some sort of horror movie."

'Don't worry Neo, I'm here. I'll protect you.' He jerked around as something moved on the edge of his sight. Nothing was there, he sighed in relief. Then yelped when something pushed him. Then slammed him into a burnt out metal desk, which groaned and collapsed under his weight.

Neo's voice up ahead "What the fuck ? Why'd it really have to be haunted ? " then walked cautiously back toward him. The man jumped and raised an eyebrow as he picked himself up.

Neo asked him "Smith ? What, what are ... you doing here ? "

"I was following you. I wanted to make sure you would not get yourself killed. You know this place is haunted since you were listening to the little idiot. "

Neo laughed " Wow, never thought I'd agree with you before that. Seriously, one time I went looking for a werewolf just cause he asked me to. I hope he's not in love me, that'd be awkward. "

He also answered the unspoken question "Trust me, if he wants to live he will not say anything. This place was burned down, I never figured out if was a glitch, Exiles or Rebels that did it. Plenty of people died and it was rumored that they summoned a Demon. "

Neo laughed again and looked around nervously "A Demon ? Like a pie Demon ? No way in hell. Those don't exist." then yelped as a pie slammed into his face. "Owww, fuck. Smith something scratched me. "

Watched as the other blinked pie out of his eyes before wiping some off . 'Wonder if he tastes as good as he looks ? Hmm, I really shouldn't have thought of that.'

And he reached a hand out to run it over Neo's cheek-bone. Licked it off his hand and noted that it was some sort of coconut and chocolate mix. Smirked as he noticed an opportunity, then leaned in and kissed him. Pulled back to say " You missed some. Hmm, not bad. But maybe that's just you. "

Neo stared at him in surprise and asked "Smith are you ... . " Yet another two pies flew out of nowhere, one hit him in the back of the head. The other slammed into Neo's chest, who actually got winded from the force of it.

"Smith, I don't think that ... Demon likes us. "

"What is the One scared of a little pie ? "

"No. I'm scared because it's a fucking Demon."

Smith blinked in surprise he'd never heard Neo swear this much before. He ran his fingers through his hair, trying to pick out the pie as Neo stood up. At first he just brushed off the pie, then just unbuttoned the cassock and dropped it. Stared at him, now if only he could get Neo to do that a few more times. Then he stared because of the words carved out of the black shirt.

" Leave or stay. Face the consequences or die. Your choice."

He muttered "Hmm, funny thought you'd be too small to fit sentences. It even gave us options, how ... nice of it. I think. "

"What the hell are you on about ? Small ? Fuck you. "

Grinned back "Later definitely. "

Neo blushed, shook his head and muttered "This is crazy. I'm crazy. Why the hell'd I agree to this ? "


Shadows flickered as the lights came on and went off. He didn't answer and started walking, Neo raced to catch up. We walked into an office, it was covered in what looked like blood.

"I don't like this, not at all. Ahhk. " We crashed to the floor and he rolled off of Neo. Wondered why he'd done that. Then he saw it... a giant ... Pie Demon stood over us.

Somehow it was terrifying a being made of coconut, chocolate, banana and lemon pudding. Well, it was an eleven foot Demon made of pie after all, you did not see those everyday. It had crusts for eye-lashes, sharpened claws and horns. The Demon glared at us with glowing blood-colored also had a giant sword made of molten metal.

Neo whimpered "Dear god , I don't wanna die this way. " and pulled him into his side. Terrifying as the Pie Demon was he couldn't keep to himself, a different sort of whimper coming from Neo.

Then something else, the ghost from before appeared again. He could actually see it now, it was a smaller, white-haired woman. Somehow he knew it was glaring at the Demon.

"You leave those boys alone, they ain't done anything to you. Go. Shoo. You're not welcome here. "

The Demon growled it sounded like a roaring furnace " Who are you to stop me ? You're nothing but a ghost. You have no power over me. "

What could only be called Pie - shadow Demons appeared around the room. Great now there were four of them and they looked angry, it was his turn to whimper. Bits of crust flew at them and he hissed as one cut through his arm.

The ghost replied "Did you forget where we are ? "

Suddenly pies were flying everywhere Neo, himself and all the Demons got covered. The pies almost seemed to glow with some sort of light. Pie-Demons howled as they exploded and disappeared.

He blinked as Neo kissed him and then licked his cheek. "Hmm, your right. Just, maybe you're not so bad after all. "

Groaned and then replied "Neo, you know this place is a mess. A fucking mess. "

"Sure, looks like it huh. As for that Smith. I don't give a damn. Now say it again. " Then Neo leaned over him, lips on his neck.

A few seconds later he pulled at the torn shirt and asked "Wha ? Ahh, fucking Neo did you just bite me ? "

" That's it, good doggy. Maybe..."

He blinked at Neo and groaned again. 'What is he doing ? Ahh, that's it yes. Mmm.'

Four hours later

It'd been so long since anyone'd shown up here. Especially as good-looking as these men were. Mary grinned as she watched them, they were still at it. Why couldn't everyone be as satisfying as these two ?


The End - Thanks for reading, please review.