The Photo Album
The Photo Album
By: P.E.E.V.S.Y.
Disclaimer: I obviously don't own Harry Potter. Sorry.
Okay, so I know your average every day Joe uses something called a diary to keep track of important events in life and everything. And I know that most people who want to use photos to preserve things do something called scrap booking. I know this, okay? You don't have to tell me. So just shut up. It's not my fault that I keep a photo album instead, alright? I got the original album from Aunt Audrey who is, like, a rabid picture taker or something.
I wasn't actually planning on using it. I hate cameras. They scare me and I can never take good pictures. This is why that huge empty photo album was going to disappear under my bed along with my broomstick and never be seen again. Ever.
But then James had to make fun of my photo album in front of Aunt Audrey. I know he wouldn't have done it if Aunt Audrey had been in front of him instead of behind him. But still! So that was when I had to defend the stupid thing, so that Aunt Audrey would quit looking like one of those poor, sopping wet mutts that someone had just kicked. And I ended up telling James that I actually loved it and was going to take it with me everywhere, and take pictures of everything and then write about what happened and then put the parchment with the photo in the album, like a diary. That was when Aunt Audrey lit up like a Christmas tree, whisked me away, bought me a camera and ten billion rolls of film and told me to get cracking! And because I felt really, really guilty, I did.
Now I can't stop. It's like a really, really, really bad habit. I always have a camera with me, everywhere. And I'm always taking pictures of everything, and I do mean everything! Al, my best friend and favorite cousin, told me that it's slightly creepy and that he's probably going to go blind from all the flashes soon.
Anyway, the fact that I take so many pictures, I suppose, is why I filled up the last photo album and now have this one. Yeah, you know, the photo album that you apparently opened in spite of the really large 'THIS IS ROSE WEASLEY'S PHOTO ALBUM YOU GIT! STOP LOOKING AT IT!!' that I wrote on the cover of it. Thanks for ignoring me by the way. I really appreciate it (please note the sarcasm. I don't appreciate it in the least and would really love it if you stopped looking at this).
Anyway, now that I explained what this is to my elderly self (since that's the only person who should be looking at this, hint hint, wink wink!), I suppose you ought to move on to the actual photos. My comments on the photos will be located on the parchment folded up and stuck behind them. If you are my elderly self or have received my express permission to look at this, feel free to pull the parchment out and read my comments. If you're not my elderly self or don't have permission, shut this right now and go think about what an awful nosy person you are and pray to God that I don't find out about this and hex you. Thank you.
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Alrighty, photograph number one! Notice how this photograph is not blurry, crooked and doesn't have someone's head cut off? Yeah, that's because I didn't take this picture. Dennis Creevy did. He's been taking the annual Weasley/Potter Clan (yeah, I said clan. There's twenty five of us for heaven's sakes! If that's not a clan, I don't know what is! Well, technically, I do, but that's beside the point) picture since as long as I can remember. This is the most recent of the family 'portraits' as Granddad Weasley calls them.
Anyway, I'm not really a fan of the family 'portraits' because I don't think they do a good job of portraying us at all. See, all the mothers (including Grandma Molly) spend all day preparing us and making sure we look perfect for the picture. The end result is something like what you see: a picture of a perfect, happy, positively normal, albeit a little bit large, Wizarding Family. This, my dear friend, could not be farther from the truth.
Victoire Weasley, the eldest of the children of the clan at 21, is pictured at the far left corner of the photograph. She's the one with the silky silvery blonde, shoulder length hair, the perfect smile, classical features and the thick eyeliner, black tank top and skinny jeans. From this picture you are probably under the (very mistaken, might I add) impression that Vic is either a) a complete phony or b) nauseatingly perfect. I am proud to say that neither is the case.
Vic is, for lack of better words, the coolest rebel you will ever meet. Before Aunt Fleur attacked her and started bemoaning about how awful she looked, Vic was wearing her customary 16 earrings (eight in each ear) her lip ring, tongue ring, nose ring and eyebrow ring. She was also wearing this really cool skull and cross bones choker that she made herself and her hair was choppy and short and, to put it simply, kinda punk. She looked amazing. However, with much swearing on Vic's part, and furious wand waving on Aunt Fleur's part, she became as you see her. Not very Vic-ish, but rather, more Dom-esque. Who, coincidentally is right next to Vic in the photo.
She's the one with the plaited, silky red hair, black cocktail dress, sweet grin and the drawn in devil ears and pitchfork. I added the pitchfork and devil ears in case you were wondering. Anywho, Dom is actually short for Dominique and at 19, she is the second oldest of the Weasley/Potter Clan. I don't like her very much. Despite her very sweet, innocent and naïve demeanor, she is a complete monster. She's a control freak, obsessive compulsive, a tattle-tail, a complete fake, devastatingly clever and conniving. Not to mention a complete monster. Oh, did I mention that I hate her? Because I do. I really, really, really hate that arrogant, vain, manizer. And yes, I know that's not a word. So shut up.
Behind the Monster, is Aunt Fleur and Uncle Bill. Aunt Fleur is smiling prettily and expertly hiding her awful temper and arrogant streak while Uncle Bill is looking scarred and slightly scary in an excellent attempt to hide how sweet and smart he really is. He's totally one of my favorite relatives. Next to him, is Louis, the last of the Bill/Fleur part of the Weasley/Potter Clan.
Louis is 17 years old and best friends with the two boys standing to his left: Fred Weasley (son of Aunt Angelina and Uncle George) and James Potter (Al's older brother and son of Aunt Ginny and Uncle Harry). I mention this only because I'm going to describe them all together. And I'm only going to describe them all together because I think it would be nothing short of a crime not to. They're inseparable and just plain scary.
Now, I don't mean scary in looks. As you can see, with Louis' earlobe length, blond hair, dazzling smile and rugged good looks, he's not scary to look at. In fact, if he weren't my cousin and if he hadn't been teasing me and pranking me since I was in diapers, I might be too shy to speak in front of him and all his hotness.
And the only scary thing about James Potter's (the smirking idiot directly to Louis's right) face is the smirk. Other than that, his casually floppy dark brown hair, hazel eyes and general scrawny-ness, might be classified as cute, maybe even handsome. But the smirk is just dangerous. It gives an inside look to the madness with in.
Fred, who is on James's right, is also fairly handsome. He has this great cocoa colored skin, this awesome black hair and these really cute freckles which look totally out of place on him. If it weren't for the fact that he was giving James bunny ears, he might actually look like a mature young adult. As it is, he totally just ruined it for himself.
Anyway, the three of them together (plus their best friend Romulus and occasionally, though not as often as some would think, their other friend and the girl James has fancied since he was eleven even though the stupid idiot will never admit it, Kilee. Kilee and Romulus are complete sweethearts and totally deserve better friends than my crazy cousins. Although, granted, Kilee might actually become my cousin in law if James has his way… and Kilee hers since Kilee has also fancied James since forever even though neither of them knows the other fancies—whoa. Way off topic. Sorry) cause more than half of Hogwarts' problems. It's really a complete miracle that they're still alive.
James has got to be the most reckless person known to man, poor Fred the most accident prone and Louis has to be in the spotlight all the time and positively must let people know what they've done even if it does means a dozen detentions for each of them. To be painfully honest, I will be shocked if the three of them don't land themselves in Azkaban before their twentieth birthdays…
Next to Fred is his family: Roxanne (whose blue robes, you have got to admit, completely accent her blue eyes that I'm totally jealous of. After all, how many people with that dark of skin and hair have that blue of eyes?) looking positively exasperated about her brother and his bunny ears (Roxy spends most of her time looking exasperated about Fred and when she's not doing that she's on the Quidditch Pitch hitting bludgers at people. She is really strong and really mature for being such a scrawny fourteen year old), Aunt Angelina (who's laughing and looking very much like Aunt Angelina for once) and Uncle George (who's making Aunt Angelina laugh and wearing the magenta robes of WWW that clash horrifically with his hair).
Next to them is Uncle Charlie. Uncle Charlie is smiling wearily and looking kinda depressed. You can't really blame the guy. Only a month before this picture was taken, the love of Uncle Charlie's life (Vera MacDonald, who everyone in the Clan loved and adored and was hoping Charlie would marry) had died in an awful accident with one of the dragons she was studying. Mum and I reckon poor Uncle Charlie will never get over it. He can't even hide it in the photograph, although, Grandma Molly did make him change out of his pajamas and into some decent clothes.
Speaking of Grandma Molly, she and Granddad Weasley are right next to poor Uncle Charlie. In case you're wondering what it is Granddad is looking so guilty about and why Grandma looks so furious, it's because Grandma just found out that Granddad was tinkering with another car trying to make it fly. According to Dad, Granddad did this before and it somehow ended with Uncle Harry and Dad crashing into the Whomping Willow at Hogwarts. Apparently Grandma Weasley wasn't very happy about it. I can't imagine why…
Anywho, next to the Grandparents, you will see the lovely Aunt Audrey. She's the wispy little brunette witch that looks like one good puff of air will knock her over. She's also the one who got me hooked on this really awful, really horrible habit of photo album-ing. And yeah, I know that's not word. So shut up. Anyway, on top of looking so frail, Aunt Audrey has got to be the nicest, the sweetest, the most-forgiving person that I have ever met. And when you combine that with how frail and pitiful looking she is, can you really blame me for wanting to make her feel better? Though, I know now better. That woman can be downright determined when she wants something. I don't think I've ever been more scared than I was the day she nearly got into a fist fight with some body builder in the grocery store over a bunch of bananas.
Next to her is Molly, age 19. In case you couldn't tell, yes, she is wearing really dorky glasses. And yes, her chin length hair does look like someone cut it with a shears. And yes, that is a noose around her neck. I drew that in. I don't like Molly very much either.
She's not as bad as Dom is though and sometimes can be positively nice. Especially when she loans me her books. However, most of the time, she's really catty, super gossipy and, her worse trait if you ask me, she tells Dom everything. This is really depressing, because if Dom hadn't been such an awful influence on her, I think Molly could have been decent and we may have gotten along well. She likes reading too and who doesn't like gossip once in a while? I'm positive that if she and Dom hadn't grown up together, Molly would have been a lot nicer about her gossip too. Oh well, I guess.
Anyway, Lucy, who's next in line, is 16. She's the really cute girl with the round face, tiny build and that really bright tomato red hair that is refusing to stay in its ponytail. I like Lucy. She's nice. Maybe a bit too bubbly and a bit too happy-go-lucky and, over all, a bit too Hufflepuff-ey if you know what I mean but generally Luce is nice and fun. Besides, she is really great at cheering people up. You might be able to tell that by that huge grin she's got and how she keeps waving and bouncing up and down like a rubber ball.
Next to Luce is Uncle Percy, glasses and all. He's smiling in this picture and looking generally relaxed and normal. Uncle Percy's a complete nutter most of the time though, especially when it comes to breaking rules and all, but according to Dad he used to be ten times worse. Besides, it's kinda funny when he goes on one of his rants about cauldron policy, or broomstick policy or whatever soapbox he's on that day.
Next up is my family. Dad's first. He's the tall guy with the freckles. He's smirking down at Mum who's blushing. Hugo, the short kid next to them and my little brother, says that Dad just told her a dirty joke. I'd believe that. It sounds like something my Dad would do and something Mum would blush about.
Anyway, onto Hugo who, like I said, is my 13 year old little brother. He's a complete pain in the bum. He likes telling off-color jokes, tripping people and flirting with girls. He also has a really bad habit of running his hand through his red hair (a habit I swear he picked up from Al just to drive me insane) and seems to think that if he wears that Chudley Cannons t-shirt long enough they'll actually win something. Good luck with Hugh.
Next to Hugo is only the most gorgeous person in the whole photograph: Me! Even though, in retrospect, that dress Mum made me wear makes me look more bean-pole-ish than usual (which is saying something, because I always look like a bean pole: far too tall and far too skinny). It does nothing for my brown eyes…And it really clashes with my huge red hair too. Which, now that I think about it actually does look kinda like a clown wig, what with it only reaching my earlobes and being red (though, it's actually more auburn than red really) and poufy… Huh. I might actually have to apologize to Scorpius Malfoy (one my acquaintances and Al's best friend beside myself) for hexing him when he told me that… he might have just been trying to be helpful…
But in any case, it is so not my fault that it looks like that! See, last year, only a week before school got out, I was trying to study for my exams and my stupid hair kept falling into my face! Now, I don't know if you know this, but I'm taking every single class Hogwarts offers (you have no idea how long I had to beg Mum to let me… it took me ages to convince her that I'd be fine!) and I was naturally a bit overwhelmed. So, really, you can't blame me for just chopping it all off with my wand in a fit of frustration. Really. And, it's starting to grow out again. It's even now and I'm pretty sure it looks okay when I wear headband…
Anyway, moving on to Al. He's the kid next to me that only reaches my shoulder with the super messy black hair, green eyes and the one that kinda looks like a miniature of the man next to him. (Who is my Uncle Harry and Al's dad.)
Al's a complete sweetie and my very best friend. I love him to death. See, Al's a total angel (thus the halo I drew in) and not about the whole breaking rules bit. He breaks more than his fair share of rules and we've done numerous detentions together. I just mean that he's an angel when it comes to people. I have never met a sweeter, kinder, funnier boy than Albus Severus Potter. Not that you'd know this from the picture. He looks rather demented here, doesn't he? What with that manic grin, the crazy glint in his eye and the way he keeps rubbing his hands together before throwing his head back and laughing evilly.. But that's only because James had insulted Al's girlfriend several minutes before this was taken. Al can be a bit overprotective and a little over sensitive.
Anyway, next to Al is Uncle Harry and Aunt Ginny, who are almost like second parents to me. Hugo and I seriously spent as much time at their house growing up as we did at ours, and vice versa. I love them both to death as well. They're fantastic.
And finally, you have Lily Luna Potter. She's the kid with that fiery red hair, and really big grin who is waving at you rather desperately from the far right. I like Lily too. She's got great spirit and always, always, always, always, always speaks her mind. It gets her into trouble sometimes seeing as her mind's not always the nicest. Anyway, she's also the best Quidditch Player Hogwarts has ever seen and the sole reason why Hufflepuff (because my darling, bad tempered cousin is, in fact, a Hufflepuff… crazy, isn't it?) has won the past three Quidditch cups, much to Al's and James' embarrassment and dismay. Unfortunately, she's also more than a little spoiled and can also be a brat…
Anyway, there you have it: the Weasley/Potter Clan and my first photograph in my brand new album. And they're in here because, despite how much I hate some of them (cough DomandMolly cough) and how annoying some of them are (cough LouisJamesFredLilyLucyandHugo cough) I really do love them all to death and they are a huge part of my life. But I kinda got to stop writing now because Professor Trelawney the Divination teacher is glaring at me and I don't think I can tell her that the fates have come upon me and want me to write down a message for them again. I mean, she already fell for it once, but I doubt she's stupid enough to do it again. Maybe I can—Holy crap! I forgot about Teddy!
He's the guy who keeps walking back and forth and ducking and talking to people. His hair changes depending on where he is. When he's near the Bill/Fleur section, he's got the silvery blond hair, when he's in the middle he's got the red, and when he's by the Potters and the Fred/Angelina section he's got the black hair. Occasionally you may even see his hair flash turquoise. Anyway, he's Teddy Lupin and while we're not blood related, he is definitely family.
He's super cool, super nice and a metamorphagis which is totally awesome. Oh yeah, and he's engaged to Vic. Which, by the way, is a really funny story. See, Vic hates romance. She totally rebels against it and if anyone tries to be romantic to her, she will laugh in their face and tease them within an inch of their life. So, Teddy knew this and, being the nice, caring person he is, he went with Vic's hate of romance when he planned his proposal.
This is how it went down: Teddy walked up to Vic one day in the middle of one of the Weasley/Potter Clan's Sunday dinners, plopped down next to her and started to eat his food. Anyway, half way through Grandma Molly's amazing lasagna, Teddy turned to Vic and said, "Hey Vic. You know, I've been thinking."
And then Vic made some sarcastic, witty comment about how she didn't know he could do that. Teddy rolled with it and then kept going, "You know I love you and all and you love me and I get along pretty well with your family too,"
And Vic, who was a little confused by now, went with it but was shooting him bizarre looks. Uncle Harry, of course, already knew that Teddy was going to propose, so he started watching. Aunt Ginny, Uncle Bill and Aunt Fleur also knew Teddy was planning on popping the question soon but they didn't believe Teddy would actually propose in the middle of dinner. Uncle Harry knew better though. So did Al and I
See, Al and I were right across from the two lovebirds and Teddy had winked at us and sent us a paper airplane informing us to watch. Which we were totally doing. So, anyway, then Teddy continued in between bites and not really looking at Vic, you know, acting like this was just another, normal conversation.
And Teddy says, "I also hear that Lily thinks it'd be really cool if I could really be part of the family,"
Vic is just staring at him by now, lasagna still in her mouth, unchewed. Oh, and Aunt Ginny, Uncle Bill, Aunt Fleur and Mum had caught on by now and were all gaping at him. Al and I were starting to get where this was going to and I, for one, was grinning like a Cheshire Cat. Anyway, Teddy ignored this, and as cool as you please went on eating as he talked.
"This is really great lasagna Mrs. Molly!" he even complemented Grandma. No joke! Anyway, then he went on talking to Vic, "So, anyway, I was just wondering if you might want to get married some day. James, pass the beans please,"
James and everyone else (including Vic) were just staring at him and Teddy was just eating away as if this was the most natural thing in the world. But, anyway, James obviously didn't answer. So Teddy looked up and asked again, "James. The beans," And James just blinked and if anything looked more confused. So Teddy, being Teddy, shouted, "OY! James! The beans!"
This seemed to wake people up and, while James still didn't give him the beans, Vic finished her lasagna and turned to him and asked, sounding completely bewildered, "Did you just propose?"
And Teddy said, "Well, that's what I hear they call asking someone to marry you these days. So, what'd ya say? And James, I could grow old here waiting for the
Sorry. I'm going to have end this because Trelawney is looking furious at me. I'm going to see if I can get away with saying that I foresaw my death in the crystal ball and that I was putting my affairs in order. She might fall for that and I'm pretty sure I can get myself into some near tragic accident with Al's help…
A/N: Sorry! I got hit by a Next Generation bug and I had to right this. I'm especially sorry to those of you who are reading Messing with Time. I've been working on it for weeks and I just can't get it right! I'll update that as soon as I can. Anyway, to those of you who just read this, I would love you forever and ever if you tell me what you think of this. Oh, and I'd also like to know if you'd be interested in me possibly posting more of these. If I do that, it will not be very often. I am trying to work on another fanfic of mine and that comes before this. I'd only update this when I'm either hit by a writing bug or stuck on something else. In any case, please review and tell me what you think!
Thanks for reading!
-P.E.E.V.S.Y.
