They had come to a complete standstill, one of either side of the abused kitchen table. Two pairs of dark eyes met, neither willing to move. Stalemate. The staring contest ensued, both glaring as hard as they could, not to be the first to back down, to admit defeat in the face of the other man. Raidou gave in, his spiky head falling forwards as he spoke.
"It's not like I was asking you to build an empire overnight, Genma. All I asked you to do was cook something edible for dinner. Not hard."
"Well it's not my fault. I didn't know you were allergic to sushi. If you'd told me I-"
"Genma! I'm not allergic to fucking sushi! It's just that you obviously so plainly suck at cooking you don't know what a fucking knife looks like!"
"I know what a knife looks like. I don't think a kunai is much different."
"You don't sterilize your fucking kunai Gen! Knives are washed regularly. They are sharpened on one side." He wrenched the sharp knife out of the tabletop and threw it at his flatmate.
Genma barely dodged the flying knife, ducking to let it thud into the wall behind him instead of his head. "That kunai was clean! I wiped all the blood off it!"
"BLOOD? No wonder I was sick you stupid retard! You are the only person in the world fucking stupid enough to use a dirty bloody kunai to cook-"
"Hey! I wiped off all the blood!"
"Anyone with half a fucking brain cell would stop and think 'perhaps I should use a knife'" He picked up a second off the counter and flung it at the long haired shinobi.
Genma quickly pulled the first blade from the wall and used it to deflect the sharp projectile. "What is your problem man? And stop trying to cut my hair!" He ran a protective hand through the dark chin length strands.
"My problem you fucker," he grabbed a knife from the drying rack and vaulted over the table, holding it firmly in his hand. "Is that you," he swung the knife at Genma who raised the knife in his own hand to deflect it. "Didn't tell me," clang. "You can't cook," clang. "To save your sorry arse," clang. "And you just let me get fucking food poisoning!" Thud. He had thrown the knife as hard as he could and it had knocked the one Genma had out of his hand. Both were not embedded in the wooden floor.
Genma had the decency to look sheepish. "I didn't know where the knives were or which one I should have used even if I did find them and I figured a kunai was close enough." He trailed off, looking at the floor where one of the knives had fallen unnervingly close to his bare foot.
Raidou blinked. He hadn't- He stifled a snigger at Genma's misfortune, but the sound bubbled up and came out as a snort. He sniggered openly and began to laugh. "You could just have said you didn't know how to cook." He found Genma's arms around his waist and he breathed in the jounin's scent. Suddenly the world was perfect again.
