This song "Leaving You" left me a lil' sad, so I decided to make my first fanfic.

I hope you'll forgive the errors, as I'm not a native English speaker (I'm an Spaniard, you see).

This fanfic is a parody of the "Rocky" film series, and it will have two sequels. Fetaures a little charachters from other series.

I put annotations for the readers to imagine some kind of soundtrack.

And then, let's go with the story.

This story is based on characthers from Rumiko Takahashi works. Rocky is a trademark of United Artists.

ATARU I

CHAPTER 1- DUEL

It was a cold, foggy morning in Tomobiki. As ever, at Moroboshi's it was a little war: Lum had found that Penthouse Magazine colletion which Dad had hide under under an armachair, and she was accusing Ataru for buying them. He thankfully avoided her, and ran away to High School, hoping the mist to hide him from her fury. He was sad at that moment. He was thinking about a song called "Leaving You", that made him think about a possible end of his relationship with Lum. His Lum. (Now the song "Philadelphia Morning", from "Rocky" soundtrack starts to play as we see him walking).

It seemed it was going to be a normal day: falling asleep in class, fight Mendou, chase chicks, be beaten to death by the same chicks, bullying with Jariten, chase more chicks and sleep again, with some pauses to have a little meal. The live of a clumsy plyboy is some kind of monotone life, you know... But that day was going to be so different from the rest. That day, our "hero" 's life was gonna change for the rest of his days.

It was playtime, and Ataru was going to his favourite tree to rest and meditate about the mathematic formula to determine the average speed of an ascending drop of the liquid material inside the lava lamps (an interesting matter we all want to be answered! Ah, don't you?) when a very familiar femenine voice shouted in panic, imploring help. Like a Japanese Quixote he ran where the voice was coming. It was Lum sorrounded by one (yes, only one, but what a one, guys) of the shittiest, despicable guys of Tomobiki's dolce vita: It was Keitaro Hiribiki, aka Biglipsdude.

Some of you maybe remember a big, bald guy, with sunglasses and the widest lips you'd ever seen in an anime show, who appeared on UY a couple of times, and even fought Lum once. Well, he was holding the cow by the horns... Err... Well, I want to say that the big bastard was holding Lum by the horns, leaving her helpless, she wasn't able to fly, nor to zap...

He had to do it. It was his obligation as a man (what an old but noble idea!). He touched Biglipsdude's back with his index finger, and the bully turned around. Ataru's fist flew and impacted violently against his huge lips.

Biglipsdude fell backwards. He was K.O.

"Are you alright?" Atary asked Lum, who was still frozen in horror

"I... I..." And her face lighted up "Oh, yeah! Oh, Darling, you saved me as a fairy tale knight saves his princess!"

"Mmm... Oh, shut up, you silly girl" Ataru said in a sweet, mellow tone "I would made it for any woman in the world"

"No you don't"

"Yes! Wanna see it? Hey, Sakura, do you want to be saved a little, too?" Said Ataru, laughing and running to Sakura.

(We hear a fast-paced version of "Jaws" theme)

Lum started chasing him, flying, and willing to fry him like a frozen Chip but stopped abruptly when she saw Biglipsdude running after him, going to punishAtaruwithout as consideration as she. Ataru's mind was completely distracted with Sakura, so he wasn't able to note how that sunglassed gorilla was coming to him like some kind of Santa Fe Express. He didn't deserved that lesson.

"DARLING! ATARU-KUN! BEWARE! THE BIGLIPSDUDE! THE BIGLIPSDUDE IS COMING!"

(Now it's total silence, even without sound effects. Imagine this scene in slow motion)

When he looked back, he only saw a huge fist coming to him. The rest was pure reflex. He bended his knees, crouching down spectacularly fast. He heard the sound of the fist cutting the air. Then, the sound of a beat. He got up to see who or what had been punched. He saw Sakura flying on Tomobiki's cloudy sky. Far, far, away, until she dissapeared fom the view... When she was rescued on the top of Mount Athos by the Greek police, she was only able to say and repeat:

"Miracle! Miracle! I teleported myself , yes, I do! Like Uhura, guys! I knew I had powers! I knew it! I teleported myself to Arizona, and the Incredible Hulk came and punched me! Cool!"

Biglipsdude looked at Ataru. He was terrified to death:

"Inczedible! You'dze the fiszt mothezfuckez who managez to dodge one of Biglipzdude'z punchez".

"Oh yeah? Cool..." Said Ataru, his voice trembling

"Yup. And I just can't ztand zcrapz like you makin' fun of Biglpizdude! And not only that, don't allow me to touch cute hornz"

"Who, me?"

"Yez. Biglipzdude challengez you: He'z the national champion of a new zport: The X-dzeme boxing . Sudze you'dze not capable to beat thiz 17 yearz old champion of the Zenior categodzy!"

"Me? But... I..."

"Ah, you agdzee? 'Kay, so Biglipzdude zeez you the 7th of Madzch: thee months fthom now, on School's Gym"

"..."

"Bye, diggity daffodil"

(We can hear a version of that "I'm Leaving You" song, with imaginary music) All people at school looked at Ataru. He was crouching down the floor, no moving. They didn't know whether to laugh in a Nelson Muntz way for Ataru's bad luck, or cry for the poor classmate, who was always so happy and full of life, in the depths of depression. Actually, even Lum wasn't capable to do nothing. She only can hear his boyfirend murmuring:

"He's gonna kill me, He's gonna kill me, He's gonna kill me, He's gonna kill me, He's gonna kill me, He's gonna kill me, He's gonna kill me, He's gonna kill me,..."