Saturday, March 24,1984 Shermer High School Shermer, Illinois 60062
Dear Mr. Vernon,
We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was that we did wrong. What we did was wrong. But we think you're crazy to make us write a essay telling you who we think we are. What do you care? You see us as you want to see us... in the simplest and most convenient definitions. You see us as a brain, an athlete, a basket case, a princess, a criminal, and a rebel, correct? That's the way we saw each other at seven o'clock this morning.
We were brainwashed...
I hate school. That's what every sixteen year old would say, right? I mean, come on! School is a hell hole that's a prison for every one of us that hate school. Now for those of us who care, it's a place where we can learn and survive in the world.
Guess which one I'm in?
If you guessed that I was in group one, then congratulations! You have managed to find your brain and part of your common sense.
If you guessed number two, then go see a doctor or something 'cause your brain has not come back from vacation yet or you need one installed. I'm not trying to be mean, oh, wait, I am being mean, never mind!
Well, anyway, you get the gist. School is not cool and the big deal about your guessing skills yada, yada, yada. Yeah, yeah, I'm being over dramatic this time, but trust me, when I say something and I'm looking at you straight in the eyes, then I'm telling the truth.
Anyway, back to what I was talking about. I hate school because of the principle, most of the people in it, and Saturday detention. Principle equals trouble and stupidity, most of the people in school are either stuck-up snobs or jocks, and Saturday detention because of the stupid principle not letting me sleep in because I accidentally set his office on fire and proceeded to run away on my skateboard.
I did not know that plastic plants were flammable, alright? I just wanted to play with my light and...
I'm starting to get off topic, so back to the situation at hand.
I am currently walking to Shermer High School at six in the morning in bluebell jeans, tight black t-shirt, black elbow length warmers, knee length black combat boots, and a red half jacket. You could say I was very proud of what I have done to the school yesterday afternoon, but I'll tell you later. I walked into the parking lot about fifty-two minutes later with everyone already inside the building. I didn't care if I was going to get another day of detention, so I waited outside the library for Mr. Vernon.
Vernon walked into the library without noticing me there next to the library entrance in the shadows. Sometimes I wonder if he is anywhere near smart at times. He glanced around and started turning purple when he noticed I wasn't there.
Me? Slingshot plus tiny pebble equals very mad principle and a comedy show. So I took out one of my slingshots and one of my smooth pebbles, readied, aimed and fired. You should see the surprise and anger that erupted on his face when the pebble hit his smooth, round head. He turned around abruptly and saw me standing there with the goofiest smile on my face. He turned pink, then red, the finally a deep purple that caused me to snicker. I waltzed into the library with my goofy smile still plastered on my face and sat behind one of the biggest delinquents in school: John Bender. He was pretty cool if you got to know him.
He cleared his throat and started on his usual Saturday detention for all the people who are stupid (or smart enough) enough to get Saturday detention. Me? I was here for a few weeks and I already made a reputation that was probably right next to Bender's profile in the school. "Well, well. Since we are all here, I would like to congratulate everyone, except for Mrs. Cane, for being on time." He then turned toward me. "Mrs. Cane, you will get two more Saturday detentions for your little stunt earlier." I decided to piss him off some more. What can I say, it was fun!
I jumped up in my chair and went "YAY! MORE USELESS SATURDAY DETENTIONS!" I yelled at the top of my lungs. I then sat down with a fake innocent expression and sweetly said "And what did I do exactly, Mr. Vernon? Throw your sorry ass into the Caribbean? Cause that will do a whole bunch of good for this school." I sat back in my chair and watched as, once again, his face contorted into the anger colors of his face. "And you know what else I noticed?" I started with my fake sweet voice. I noticed out of the corner of my eye that everyone was trying to keep in their laughter - a couple of them actually looked horrified. "Your face is always purple. Is your favorite color purple? If you say no, I would just say you're lying cause your face says that it LOVES purple." I then sat back with a satisfied grin as I watched as Mr. Vernon yelled at me. He was saying something about two months of detention.
He calmed down in a few minutes and was going to restart his detention speech when the princess of the school, Claire, raised her hand and started talking without permission. "Excuse me sir, I think there's been a mistake. I know this is detention, but... um... I don't think I belong here." She nervously finished. The principle acted as though he didn't hear her and spoke to us. He missed the petulant pout that graced her face.
"It is now seven-o-six. You have exactly eight hours and forty-five minutes to think about why you're here, to ponder the error of your ways." He gave me a very piercing look. To anyone else, it would have been scary, but to me, it seemed as though he was trying to hold in his laughter. Seriously, it was hilarious! Check it out in my range of vision and you'll know what I mean. John launched a loogie in his mouth and caught it in his mouth.
Clair gasped disgustingly while Andrew looked like he was going to puke any minute.
"You may not talk," He looked pointedly at Clair. "You will stay in these seats," Brian, the brains of the school, moved to a seat in which I guess that he was in before Vernon walked in. Vernon walked towards where John and I sat. Vernon pulled the seat out beneath John's feet. "And you will not sleep." He walked towards Allison and kept speaking.
"Alright people, we're going to try something a little bit different today; we are going to write an essay. No less than a thousand words." He placed a paper and a pencil in front of Allison, who snapped to look up into Mr. Vernon's face. "Describing to me who you think you are." He continued to give the same materials to John and I.
'He's joking, right?' I thought as I looked at the blank piece of paper.
"This a test?" John asked but he was ignored and Mr. Vernon continued his little speech.
"And when I say essay," Vernon said as John placed his feet on the table. "I mean essay; I do not mean a single word repeated a thousand times."
"Damn it." I said under my breath. I looked over at John to see him smirk at me before turning back forward. This day just gets weirder and weirder.
"Is that clear Mr. Bender, Mrs. Cane?" Vernon asked pointedly towards the two of us.
"Crystal..." John muttered while I just laid back in a whatever kinda way.
"Mrs. Cane?" Vernon asked again.
"What? Oh, I'm sorry, then it'll probably be two or three words then." I smirked and watched the fiasco begin.
"You get another month's detention!" Vernon yelled at me.
I shrugged and said "I really have nothing else to do. So why not?" Vernon turned a few shades of purple and continued talking as if I didn't say anything.
"G-good." He managed to stutter out. "Maybe you'll learn a little something about yourselves. Maybe you'll decide whether or not you'll care to return." This principle is crazy, I have to admit.
Then Brian raised his hand, stood up, and spook without permission. "Ah, ya, I can answer that right now sir. And that would be no, no for me cause-"
"Sit down, Johnson." Vernon interrupted. Brian sat back down. "My office," Mr. Vernon pointed towards the doors of the library and down the hallway. "is right across the hall. Any monkey business is ill-advised. Any questions?" Wow, he said three whole sentences without blowing up at us. Congratulations, Vernon.
John started to speak. "Ya," He started. "I got a question; does Barry Manilow do your wardrobe?" I busted out laughing after that.
"I'll give you and Mrs. Cane the answer to that next Saturday detention." Whoop-du-de-do, Mr. Vernon.
So, this has been edited a bit. It's been a while since I've written anything for this fandom, so I decided to edit what I had first before posting anything new.
Any and all reviews from here to the third chapter will not be answered, as I am editing and do not think that it will be useful or constructive to answer them as I am editing. However, I do want to thank each and every one of you for your CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM of what I had at the moment - I am working to make sure that the story is easier to read and understand.
However, no, it is not changing all that much. Just little bits here and there, so ther we go :) Deal or no deal :D
I look forward to continuing this story :)
Disclaimer: I do not own anything familiar - just my OC and her background.
