Pretty Boys Villains Club: Watch What Happens Live!
*with all apologies to Bravo and Kubo Tite.
Summary: Parody time! Aizen talks about what's going on in the manga with some very special guests….
Somewhere in a jail cell….
Aizen: Hello once again, dear friends, to Watch What Happens where we discuss all sorts of issues. Once again, I'm your host, Aizen Sousuke…
Tsukishima: Where's your co-host? Don't you have any?
Aizen: …Excuse me.…why are YOU here?
Tsukishima: I think I just got killed off. Oh, and he let me in.
Aizen: Who? *then realizes* Oh no…..*face palms* Dear Hogkyou anyone but that asshole…
Urahara: Hey man! Long time no see! Heard you've been a good boy lately!
Tsukishima: By the way, I didn't bookmark him. Though I probably should've just did them all, huh….
Aizen: YOU THINK?
Urahara: By the way, Aizen-san? Yoruichi, Tessai and I are big fans of the show. We loved it when you had the llama on.
Aizen: I still smell Usagi's or whatever that thing was called, piss all over my Armani bedsheets. Thank you Urahara. I of course, blame you, as I do for everything in my life. Anyway, why are you two here for real?
Urahara: You didn't like the hooker I sent you?
Aizen: Oh yes. Mai-san…I must thank you for her company. She was quite charming until her teeth all fell out and she reeked of cat piss. If you're going to play jokes on me and laugh at my misery until I break out of this shithole, then at least do it right. ANYWAY back to things…So you finally got killed off, eh, doppelganger?
Tsuki: I think you got me confused with Ginjou.
Aizen: Don't care. *looks at volume* Ah. So your hand was dealt by Captain Kuchiki. Did you do your…thing on him?
Tsuki: I would've had him RIGHT in the grip of my hand if it weren't for a certain writer wanting to pander to Kuchiki Byakuya's fans….
Urahara: Well….you're good-looking, I'll give you that….
Aizen: Not to mention that you and your friend made that Kurosaki boy scream like a bitch…like I knew he would.
Urahara: …Did you plan all of this to happen?
Aizen: You'd think that I'd be all ok with someone who just basically ripped off my Kyoka Sugietsu?
Tsuki: But it gets you chicks!
Aizen: *coughs*dontfuckincare*coughs Point is….you're a bad guy. Your contract is up.
Tsuki: You already know about me….Sousuke Aizen.
Aizen: It didn't work last time, you twat. And I have a motherfuckin' ball that makes me immortal. You don't. Your presecence is invalid.
Tsuki: I'll get you yet, Sousuke Aizen. And when I do? You'll regret ever kicking me off your show! *leaves the stage.
Urahara: Sweet! This was entertaining. Like the time, you confronted the Captain Commander over why he wouldn't give you the Soul Key….or when you and Unohana were making hamburgers.
Aizen: Those burgers were a godsend too. I'll give you the recipe after this is over. Sprinkle some teriyaki sauce. Goes well with a nice glass of red Port.
Urahara: You're still wondering why I'm here, aren't you? *fans self* J
Aizen: That thought did cross my mind.
Urahara: I donated some cameras and some computer equipment to Avici. Thought it might do the prisoners some good to be creative. You're using equipment that's been donated by Urahara Shoten!
Aizen: HEY GUARD I'm DONE NOW. Seriously!
Urahara: That's right! Come down to the Urahara Shoten for all of your reigai and other needs. Say you watched the series I'll give you 10 percent off on anything in the store and a free box of candy!
Aizen: HA. Urahara, I'm seriously surprised that the government still lets you run that hole with all of your crappy candy that's stale as a rock. I've had Hollow kibble in Hueco Mundo that taste better than that shit. Anyway, thanks for watching!
Urahara: I'm LOCATED IN KARAKURA CHO! THAT'S KA=RA
*broadcast ends
I wasn't planning on doing a sequel to the First Pretty Boy story but people kept begging me. Originally this was supposed to be another Aizen/Tsuki exchange, but…being the lovable perv he is, Urahara stole the show. :D If anyone wants me to do more of these, I will, but only if I get at least five comments.
